Startled, Malcolm looks guilty as hell when he turns to me and raises my bikini picture in the air. "Sorry... Um, wow. You look-"
"Scrawny?" I add helpfully walking toward him to take the picture.
"Ah, no. Not scrawny," he says without finishing his sentence.
Taking the picture from him, I open the other half of Tyler then quickly bend it back again. "This was the only vacation we ever took together. And 5 minutes after this picture was taken, which was like 10 minutes after we arrived I had heatstroke and was horribly sunburned. I also had water poisoning from some ice cubes the very next day," I grin shaking my head to Malcolm just listening. "It was awful for me. And I spent the next 5 days so sick in bed I could only enjoy the last day we had there."
Thinking of that vacation from hell for me, I remember saving up for it, and being so excited when I booked it. I remember feeling like such an adult at 20 years old when we arrived together holding hands like a married couple on their honeymoon.
Jolting me from my memories, Malcolm asks, "Was he good to you when you were sick?"
"Yes," I whisper back until he nods, releasing me from our intense moment again.
"Well, you looked beautiful, Saige."
"Thank you. I didn't like wearing a bikini but Tyler bought it and insisted, so I couldn't say no. But I felt good, for 5 minutes anyway."
Taking the picture with me to the kitchen, I throw it in a drawer of miscellaneous crap and continue unpacking.
I don't know what to say, and I feel uncomfortable around Malcolm feeling sad about Tyler.
Saved by the downstairs buzzer minutes later, Malcolm lets the furniture movers in.
"Anywhere is fine," I look around at all the stuff everywhere. Really, I don't know where we have room to even put the bed frame together, but Malcolm quickly figures it out by just sliding my couch all the way into the kitchen with boxes on it.
After tipping the movers, I look at the 4 huge boxes and mattresses pushed against the wall regretting instantly not paying the extra fee for assembly. "I don't know where to start," I huff exhausted.
"Let me go get my toolbox from my truck. I'll have this done in less than half an hour, I promise."
"We'll see," I grin. "If it’s anything like IKEA furniture- the relationship destroyer- we'll be fighting in no time and the bed frame will be assembled upside down."
"That actually happened to me once with a girlfriend I had in my early twenties. We lasted about 4 hours after she bought a desk from IKEA. And the rest is history," he laughs. "IKEA really should put a warning on their boxes, or offer couples counselling with each 'assembly required' purchase."
"I know. I helped Selena with a bookcase when she moved into her place 2 years ago and by the end, we weren't even speaking."
"So I'll get my tools, and you stay away from me while I assemble. We should be safe if we don't make any eye contact once I begin."
"Deal."
An hour later, I can't stop giggling hanging my clothes in the closet. Malcolm is swearing nonstop and he has the Scottish spin on swearing my mum has. I really don't know how it's possible for Nessie to do that, but the imagery of the Locke Ness Monster humping sheep is hysterical.
Watching Malcolm strong arm the first mattress over to the frame, I attempt to help until he says, "It's not safe yet," which naturally makes me start giggling again while attempting to hide it with weird coughing noises.
"Done," he barks sounding so pissed, I try to hide my smile but can't. "Stop laughing. They weren't even in English, and the stickers were alphabetical all the way to M, but F and J were missing, so it should hold," he shrugs looking pissy, and deadly, and violent, and actually kind of cute all pissed off.
"Thank you. Can I sit on it?"
"Oh, Christ. I hope so," he says so seriously I barely hold in my laughter as I sit down gently, holding myself still and nervous until the bed doesn't break or even creak under me.
"I think we're good," I lie back exhaling deeply every annoying ache and pain in my entire body. "Ummmph!" When Malcolm jumps on the bed beside me, I'm tossed up then right into his side with the dip of the mattresses.
Laughing my ass off next to him, I eventually hear him talking about the bed holding, build like a pro, and he was never worried. I hear him rambling, but I feel his warmth and just snuggle into the side of his arm for a minute peacefully.
"I'm falling asleep.”
Shaking my arm, Malcolm reminds me, "You need to buy food and take the truck back. And Selena and Griffin will be here in an hour."
"I don't need food, and I'll take the truck back later," I snuggle closer.
"You NEED to get food. You have nothing but a few slices of pizza and a can of ginger-ale."
"The perfect breakfast," I whine as my eyes close.
"I'm going to dump your ass on the floor if you don't get up."
"Please...?" I beg again actually feeling myself being pushed to the edge of the bed.
"I'm warning you. Ass meets floor in 3 seconds if you don't get up yourself. Three-Two-One. Saige!"
"Fine. Shit, I'm up okay. I just wanted to try out my new bed." Hopping off the bed I'm super annoyed and tired and just crusty as hell. I'm probably even a little PMSy though I'm not telling Malcolm that.
"Let’s drop the truck off now. It's after 6:30, so we have to go. Just drive behind me and we’ll drive back together."
Punching in my 4 digits after Malcolm dramatically looks away, we both watch the little house light up green on my phone again.
"This really is cool. Thank you so much," I squeeze his hand quickly before I turn to lock the door.
*****
"Okay, your bed is made, your apartment is getting there, and YOU have to get to bed," Selena points to Griffin. "We'll see Auntie Saige tomorrow, okay?"
"K," Griffin pouts before giving me a huge hug.
"Okay, your bed is made, your apartment is getting there, and YOU have to get to bed," Malcolm points at me as Selena starts laughing.
"K," I pout before giving him a huge hug on tiptoes. Whispering in his ear I don’t hold back. “Thank you so much for the alarm, for helping me move again, and for being the bestest friend a girl could ever have.”
"You’re welcome," he smiles. "Lock us out, and text me later."
"Will do. Thank you for my breakfast Griffin. I love Lucky Charms," I smile down at him holding the little baggie of cereal he insisted they bring me for breakfast.
"That's because you're a wee leprechaun," Malcolm adds like a smartass heading for my door cracking me up again.
"Good night, everyone."
Watching them leave for the elevators, Malcolm opts for the stairs so Selena and Griffin can go up, and after one last wave, Malcolm tells me to get in and lock up again.
Looking around my apartment, it's getting there. The corner of my kitchen holds a stack of empty boxes, and the makeshift living room looks like a living room with the exception of missing tables and lamps. But with my bookcases and books beside the couch it feels a little more like a home to me.
My new bedding doesn't match my couch at all, but it's all temporary I have to remind myself. Hopefully when I move to Cambridge I'll have an actual bedroom so I won't care about the all the crap everywhere.
Everything is temporary I have to remind myself almost hourly, especially when I see Malcolm talking to Griffin, teasing Selena, and being this constant huge, amazing presence around me.
This is all temporary.
Grabbing my phone after a quick shower I see a text from Malcolm.
'Good night, Saige. I hope you sleep well. Oh, and I think you owe me a comp'd dessert as well.:)'
'Deal. xo'
CHAPTER 21
“I never get to see you anymore, Saige. I swear, if I hadn’t invited myself to your birthday dinner with Malcolm, I wouldn’t have even seen you last week,” Selena pouts.
Laughing at her pout, I remember when Malcolm picked me up with beautiful flowers and a gift to Selena announci
ng she was ‘chaperoning’ us. Thank god Malcolm was humored and accommodating because her outrageousness could’ve been really awkward over dinner.
“Are you seeing Malcolm this weekend again for coffee?” She rolls her eyes as usual.
Selena still thinks all these nondates are funny. She keeps insisting Malcolm and I are actually dating, when in reality we actually are not at all. We may see each other almost daily but he's just my friend, and we never cross that line with each other. Ever.
"We're getting together Thursday afternoon when I'm done work to go to this recycle, refurbished place he knows where contractors drop stuff off to be reused. Hopefully, I’m finally getting a coffee table,” I huff. “Do you have any idea how much you actually use a coffee table?"
"No," she grins.
"Well, you do. Like for everything, and after 3 weeks without one I'm going crazy."
"What else are you doing?"
"Ah, I was going to ask you if your mom could babysit Griffin on Saturday night so you could come to a party with us. Bring Dave if you want," I quickly add.
Nodding already, I know she’s in. "What party?"
"Malcolm's freakily tall brother Tatum is throwing his own 40th Birthday party. And apparently it's a must go, and I was invited because Tatum thinks I'm a cute wee leprechaun," I laugh when Selena starts howling. "So, will you guys come? I think it'll be pretty wild, and their entire family will be there and I couldn't say no. But I know I'll feel a little out of place knowing only Malcolm and Tatum."
"I am soooo in. And I know Dave'll come because he's still in the honeymoon whatever YOU want, Selena, phase of our whatever."
"It'll probably be a very loud, drunk, Celtic nightmare."
"Then I'm TOTALLY in. Plus, I've got to meet the man who makes Malcolm look small and wimpy, which I still have to tell Malcolm you said about him," she teases again.
"Trust me, I'm sure he even thinks that next to Tatum. I asked Mike, too, but he can’t get out of work. Oh, and Malcolm says he won't be drinking, so he's driving, and you guys can come with us if you want?"
"Perfect. I'll wear my sexy black dress," she muses with a dirty grin I'm sure is more for Dave than me.
"Which one? You look sexy as hell in all your dresses," I pout.
"Thanks, Kiddo. Oh! You have to wear that beautiful green wrap around dress you bought last year with me. Remember?" Nodding, I know exactly what dress she means. It was an 'I'll never wear this but I LOVE it, so I have to have it' dress. "Will you wear it?"
"Maybe."
*****
On Thursday in the middle of a giant warehouse I have to know if I'm officially crazy. "Malcolm, is it weird that I love a door?"
Laughing, Malcolm shakes his head no, but does find me funny regardless. "No, wee Saige... It's a fine look’in door," he brogues which still makes my heart melt.
Tilting my head to look at it again I admit, "I'm here for a coffee table, but I love a door. I'm thinking I've lost my mind this summer."
"Or you could buy the door, and together we can make it an amazing coffee table for you? I'll show you how to sand it down, repaint it, and even how to add the tempered glass in the panels to make it an even surface."
"Really?" Feeling excited I keep looking at the damn door, and I just want it. I can't explain it, and it makes no sense to me whatsoever, but there's just something about the age and shape of it that I love.
"You don't even need to paint it if you don't want to once the old paint is removed from all the moldings. You could just stain it natural dark wood again."
"You don't mind? Is it annoying or like time-consuming to do?"
"Please... It's what I do. Among thousands of other things," he grins to my growing excitement.
"Okay. I'm buying a door. But can you take it home with you?"
"Absolutely. We can start on Sunday if you want?"
"I want. God, this is exciting. I've never made, or sanded, or done anything like this before," I kind of bounce in the aisle.
Lifting the huge door to balance on his shoulder Malcolm starts walking through the aisles of unused, leftover, recycled stuff everywhere you look. Almost like an indoor junkyard, it has so much stuff everywhere, I don't even know where to look. And unbelievably only $65 dollars later we're leaving.
"How much is a new door?"
"Like this old one? Probably close to a thousand. But a newer generic door is only a couple hundred."
"But how do they make any money charging me only $65 dollars?"
"It's all dropped off and donated. Everything is as is, so the overhead is minimal. Just salaries I would guess. Plus the building is old, and there's no heating or air conditioning as you know."
"I know. I almost passed out in there. I was soooo not made for heat," I fan my still sweaty face in his air conditioned truck listening to some funky 70's music.
*****
"Um, how have you been with the nights? You don't really say anything anymore."
Looking over at Malcolm, he glances my way and quickly back to the road. Thinking, I realize it would be so easy just to say I'm fine because I should say that. But I like talking to Malcolm.
"I've been way better than I thought I’d be in my apartment. My alarm certainly helps," I say as he grins. "And I guess the fact that I'm walked directly to my car by either Mike or Hershal helps. Plus, someone makes me text him the second I start my car, then talk to him as I run from my car into the building, so it's a lot easier than I thought it would be," I whisper squeezing Malcolm's leg as he takes my hand. "I still have that weird feeling of being watched, or like something is going to happen to me, which I know is just paranoia but-"
Exhaling, I try to focus on reality again. "Um, the only time I get really nervous now is running for my apartment, but with you just waiting silently on the phone, I feel much better- like you'll hear me get hurt and get to me quick or something. Which is stupid, I know. It's not like you live particularly close to me, but it just seems like you'd get to me quick, or get Selena, or the police, or something for me if anything happened again," I fade out when he squeezes my hand on his leg again.
"I would get to you quick. Or something, Saige. That's why I make you call until you get in your door and set the alarm- it eases me too. Especially since you won't keep the knife or Taser on you," he glares which makes me laugh.
"Il-leg-al, as I've told you a hundred times. I appreciate the thought behind them, but I can't. I have to stay a law-abiding citizen, Malcolm," I tease again after calling him a gangster one night last week when we argued over the Taser.
Looking out the window, it's still daylight even at 7:00. Its daylight and I feel like the last 7 weeks of my life have just flown by in terms of what little I've accomplished, but they’ve also crawled by because of all the fear and anxiety all the time.
"You know... This is the only summer in 4 years I've done nothing. Every year after school I was an intern at Dunsdun and Hallway Law Firm, and before that I either took extra credits or I volunteered my first year at the police precinct on Croft St."
"So why didn't you intern again? Because of what happened?"
"No. I actually chose to do nothing this summer but work. This was the last summer I had before Law School, so I wanted to spend it, um-"
"With Tyler," he exhales slowly.
Nodding, I barely find the words. "See, I'm going to be in school full time and interning every summer for at least the next 4 years. Then hopefully I'll intern in a placement with the ability to advance until I set up a case history that I can use to approach the City D.A.'s office. I need a portfolio and courtroom history to be hired as a Public Attorney.
"Anyway, this was it for me, for at least 6, maybe 7 years. I have the grades and the determination to get there, but like most occupations there's an element of nepotism. And I have no ins, except for my portfolio."
"So you wanted to spend time with him before you were too busy."
"Yes. And admittedly a little for myself as well.
I needed just a little break to rejuvenate before I threw myself back into it for years. Anyway, when Tyler told me he wanted me to take the summer off to be with him, I agreed because I wanted a break myself. I would never admit this to anyone else, but sometimes it's hard keeping everything up all the time. My grades, my job, my studies even. Sometimes I get a little tired, but I'm not allowed to be so I force myself to continue. Even if I'd like to just relax and take a breather, or maybe just be a little more normal like other people my age are, I can’t."
Well, that was the most honest I've ever been with anyone else my entire life. "But I'm not complaining or anything. I just wanted a little break, and then things changed so quickly for me between Tyler and what happened to me that now I feel like the awesome 4 1/2 months I was supposed to enjoy have been pretty shitty."
"I'm sorry you feel that way," Malcolm says pulling around the corner to my apartment.
"Do you want to come up for dinner or something?"
"No, thanks. I've got plans later, but I'll see you Saturday."
"Oh, okay." Feeling disappointed, I'm dying to know what his plans are and why he doesn't want to come up with me. Malcolm never turns down hanging out with me. "You're sure?"
"Yeah. I'll call you on Saturday before I pick you up. Text me the second you get in," he smiles quickly then just waits with the truck idling.
"Thank you for taking me today."
"You're welcome," he huffs a little before nodding toward the door.
Stepping out and down, I feel totally abandoned for some reason. Almost irrationally so. "Um, take care of my door table," I grin stupidly.
"I will. Go get inside Saige, and text me when you're in."
"Okay."
Running up the front steps, I have my key ready and my pepper spray handy. Waiting by the elevator, I know Malcolm can see me through the glass windows so I wave one more time though I can't see him at all through his tinted windows.
(Mis)Trust Page 24