by Wendy Clarke
What She Saw
A gripping psychological thriller with a heart-pounding twist
Wendy Clarke
Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Chapter 41
Chapter 42
Chapter 43
Chapter 44
Chapter 45
Chapter 46
Chapter 47
Chapter 48
Chapter 49
Chapter 50
Chapter 51
Chapter 52
Chapter 53
Chapter 54
Chapter 55
A Letter from Wendy
Acknowledgements
For my husband, Ian
One
Leona
I have no warning that anything bad is going to happen to me today. No premonition. No sense of something shifting in the shadows of my mind. As far as I’m concerned, this day is the same as the one before except for the swathes of purple bluebells that have appeared, as if by magic, beneath the trees that line the roadside.
The village shop is a mere ten minutes from my terraced cottage in the shadow of Langdon Fell and I’m enjoying the walk, pleased to have a break from soldering clasps onto the ends of silver bracelets in my workshop. Sometimes, on days when the rain sets in, dragging the sky down to meet the Cumbrian peaks, it’s easy to believe that it will never stop. It’s not like that today, though. Today is beautiful, a whisper of spring on its breath. The unfurling of the leaves, and the return of the birds to the hedgerow, a reminder that I’ve emerged safely from another winter.
Deep down inside, I still feel like me. Nothing has changed. I’m still Leona, mother of Beth. Leona, wife of Scott. Wife. Although it’s in name only, as we’ve never signed a marriage contract, I like to call myself that. A piece of paper won’t make me love him any more than I already do.
As I walk, I trail my hand along the swags of blackthorn blossom at the side of the road. Seen from a distance, the hedgerow looks as if it’s been covered in a light dusting of snow – the blackthorn winter, the locals call it. Scott tells me it’s because the white blossom often appears at the same time as the bitterly cold weather that turns the mountains of the Lake District white. It’s not cold today though and, if I choose to turn and look back the way I’ve just come, I know the snow that’s been clinging to the peaks all winter will have all but disappeared.
There’s no one else walking this way and only one solitary car has passed me. It’s how I like it and I savour the feeling of contentment. Hugging it to me as though it were a newborn. Contentment. The word conjures up images of sleeping dogs or grandmothers nodding over their knitting, but it will do for me. I’ll take contentment over the alternative any day.
High above me, in the light blue sky, a bird of prey hovers, wings spread. It’s seen its prey, somewhere in the scrubby grass and is waiting for its moment. I watch it until it gives up and soars away.
Unzipping my red walking jacket, I free myself from its waterproof prison, pulling my arms out of the sleeves and stuffing the coat into my shopping bag. I carry on, past the row of seventies houses high on the grassy slope to my left, their small glass porches overlooking the valley, and past the entrance to the campsite at Blackstone Farm. Last week there were only a few tents in the field up by the wash block. Today, I notice, more have sprung up like multicoloured mushrooms.
There are few people about. It’s Friday afternoon and most of the locals are at work. Not that many people actually live in the village now: most of the properties that cluster around the church are holiday rentals. I pass a cottage with a blue plaque on the wall telling anyone who happens to stop and read it that it’s owned by Love the Lakes Holidays. If I look through its window, I know I’ll see a cold slate floor with maybe a rag rug beneath a stripped pine dining table. And it’s a safe bet its stark white walls will be hung with pictures of Coniston Water or the fells in their splendid autumn colours.
It’s what the visitors expect, but we locals prefer a warm carpet to step onto when we come downstairs in the morning to make our tea. Not that I’m really a local. I guess it takes more than nine years to be classed as that.
A strand of blonde hair blows across my face and I tuck it behind my ear. I should probably have it cut, but Scott likes it like this. My ‘Rapunzel look’ he calls it and, in a way, I think it suits me. My life is, after all, like a fairy tale – one made famous by the Brothers Grimm, not Disney.
As I walk, I’m humming. I’m not aware of the tune to start with – it’s not the type of thing you’d hear on the radio and Beth would probably never even have heard of it. It’s only as the words start to form in my head that I realise what the song is. The melody is haunting, dragging me back to a time I’ve tried to forget so, before that can happen, I force myself to hum something else.
In a field beyond the drystone wall that follows the edge of the village, a group of lambs stand with their mothers. I stop and watch them, my elbows resting on the hard, grey slate, fascinated by their spindly legs and bottle-brush tails. A little one with a black face races its sibling to an outcrop of rock, where it stands for a moment before running back to its mother and searching for her teat.
It’s that picture I have in my mind as I push open the door of the small village shop and nod a hello to Graham Hargreaves who’s leaning against the counter, a copy of the Westmorland Gazette spread out in front of him. The top of his bent head shows a round bald patch that shines in the sunlight that’s coming through the window.
‘Want a basket?’
Without taking his eyes off the page, he leans over and lifts one from its metal cradle. I take it from him.
‘Thanks.’
Still there’s nothing to make me concerned. No warning sign. No aura. In fact, as I move between the narrow aisles of tinned peas and boxes of cat food, the random assortment of goods you find in a local village shop such as this, I have a smile on my lips, the lamb’s cute black face still in my mind.
‘Need help to find anything?’ He always asks me this, even though he’s seen me shop here nearly every day since he took over three years ago.
‘No. I’m fine.’
Pulling a scrap of paper out of the back pocket of my jeans, I run my finger down the short list to see what it is I need to buy. There’s no order to the shop, or not one that I’ve ever worked out. Kitchen rolls are wedged up against boxes of Rice Krispies and bottles of anti-dandruff shampoo, and I have to step around the economy-sized packets of loo roll and bottled water
that have been placed on the floor, being careful not to dislodge things as I pass. I put a carton of orange juice into my basket and let my mind drift to the afternoon ahead. There’s a silver bracelet that still needs finishing and the last of an earring and necklace set in a silver leaf design, ready for the craft fair in Ambleside.
The eggs are on a shelf next to me. Lifting a box down, I open the lid to check them. One by one, I take each egg out of its cardboard nest, making sure none are cracked. But, as I lift the last one out, it slips through my fingers, falling to the floor with a soft crack that makes me wince. I don’t move – just stare at the yellow yolk as it spreads across the tiles, mingling with the glutinous albumen. Bile rises and I cover my mouth with my hand. I look over at Graham, scared he’ll be annoyed.
‘No need to worry. I’ll sort it.’ With a scrape of metal on stone, he gets up from his stool and comes over, clutching a wodge of blue kitchen paper and a plastic bag to his chest. With a grunt, he kneels and, with a sweep of his hand, cleans up what he can. I turn away, unable to watch.
‘Here.’ He hands me another box of eggs. ‘Take this one instead.’
Trying to empty my mind, I follow Graham to the till and lift my basket into its cradle, relieved that the nausea has passed. There’s a basket of overpriced, cellophane-covered fudge on the counter, each bag tied with a curl of red ribbon. The fudge, along with the postcards that hang from a rack by the door and the boxes of shortbread biscuits with their pictures of Windermere and Colwith Force on the front, is meant for the tourists. Visitors who have already started to arrive in Church Langdon in cars and camper vans full of walking boots and gaiters. Visitors my husband Scott needs if he’s to make a living.
‘Want to try a piece?’ Graham pushes a plate of misshapen brown pieces towards me. Samples to entice people to buy.
‘No, thank you, but I’ll get some for Beth.’
I add the fudge, in its crinkly wrapping, to my basket before remembering that, in the last few weeks, my daughter has been on some sort of health kick. I presume it’s just a phase she’s going through, but recently I’ve been worried about her, noticing how the ridges of her collar bones are as sharp as those on Causey Pike. I’ve seen how she folds her arms across her chest, as though ashamed of its fullness, and when she walks, her body is hunched as if to make herself appear shorter.
I know I should talk to her, but the closeness we once shared seems to be slipping away from us. I consider taking the fudge out again, then change my mind, deciding Scott might like it.
‘Beautiful day, isn’t it?’
Graham leans his back against the shelves of cigarettes and nods across the small parking area towards the distant peaks. I hear the soft click-click of the window vent as it turns and notice the way the sun streams through the window, picking out the cracks in the wooden counter.
‘It is lovely, yes.’
‘Scott out today?’ He scratches the side of his cheek, his fingers rasping on the whiskers that grow there. His weekend stubble he calls it, even though the weekend is yet to begin.
‘He’s taking a party of four out to Castle Crag this afternoon. The nearer it gets to summer, the busier he’ll be.’
‘Well, it’s certainly the perfect day for walking.’
I wonder if Graham Hargreaves ever walks. I doubt it. Like many of the people who have lived in the Lakes all their lives, a walk to him is a Sunday afternoon stroll along the flat path beside the River Brathay. The people Scott takes out are tourists seduced by pictures in the cottage brochures of majestic peaks and sky-blue tarns, the clouds reflected in their mirrored surface. I don’t say any of this to Graham, just check my list.
‘Hold on a sec. I’ve forgotten the frozen sweetcorn.’
Leaving the basket, I walk to the tall freezer cabinet and as I do, the bell above the door tinkles, making me turn. A young woman backs into the shop, struggling to drag a pushchair over the threshold but, as the wheels get stuck on the step, Graham lifts the flap of the counter and comes to her rescue. Shouldering the door to keep it open, he grasps the front wheels of the buggy with his free hand and lifts it over. I hear the woman thank him. She’s not from round here – I can tell by her accent. Her back is to me but I can’t stop staring at her long dark hair. It’s like a magnet to me.
Dragging my eyes away, I reach out a hand to pull open the freezer door. I hear the woman’s footsteps in the aisle and that’s when it happens. In one heart-stopping moment, Ria’s face is reflected in the glass – just as I remember it. She’s standing behind me, her dark hair falling to her shoulders, her eyes wide in terror. The shock is like a fist to my stomach.
Instinctively, I turn, but the young woman has moved away and all I can see is Graham Hargreaves rooting around in a basket of discount DVDs. When I look back at the glass door, Ria’s face has gone, but the feeling I had when I saw her hasn’t. My hand is still raised to the door and I see it’s shaking. I stare at it as though it belongs to someone else. With a great effort, I try to still my racing heart, but instead of lessening, the feelings become stronger.
‘Are you all right, Leona?’
Graham is by my side, but it’s as if his voice is coming to me through a fog. I want to answer him, but I can’t. I feel light-headed and disembodied, as if at any moment I might float away. My fingers close around the handle of the freezer cabinet and I’m scared to let go.
‘Is something wrong?’
The sense of terror I feel is debilitating. I’m unable to move, the nerves and muscles of my body unable to respond to the messages my brain is sending to them. Graham Hargreaves has his arm around me. He’s saying something else, but I can’t hear his words.
The young woman is there too now, standing beside Graham, unsure what to do. Now she’s closer, I see she’s nothing like Ria. How could she be?
‘Do you know where she lives?’ she says. ‘Should we call someone?’
Like a dramatic scene on a stage, I’m watching it all unfold as if from a great height. I’m pressed against the freezer cabinet, the others hovering like extras, and their outlines are blurred as though viewed through dry ice. What’s wrong with me?
Graham is asking me something, his face too close to mine, his breath smelling of the salami I saw half-open on the counter when I came in. He reaches into his pocket and, through the tears that make my eyes swim, I see he’s holding out his mobile. He says the word Scott. He must be asking if he should call him.
I picture my husband on some windswept fell and I know how his forehead will crease with worry when Graham tells him he should come. He’ll turn to the party he’s leading and say he’ll have to go back – that his wife’s ill. And, when he gets here, I will have to explain all of this to him.
Every part of my body is screaming to run out of the shop, to get back to the safety of my cottage, but I make myself turn and look at Graham Hargreaves’ worried face. ‘Please. I’m fine now. You don’t need to ring him.’
‘You don’t look fine, Leona. Can I get you a glass of water?’
‘Yes, yes thanks. Just give me a moment. I expect I’m coming down with something, that’s all.’
The girl has come back, her baby in her arms, and I close my eyes for a moment to stop the images that keep forming. Opening them again, I force a smile and she looks relieved. How could I think she looked like Ria? She’s too tall, her face too round.
‘And you’re certain you don’t want me to call Scott for you?’ Graham has come back with the water. He hands it to me, but he looks uncertain. Probably nothing like this has ever happened in his shop before.
‘Yes, honestly, I’m fine,’ I say again. If I repeat it enough times, he might believe it. We all might.
‘Well, if you’re sure.’
Taking my arm, he guides me back to the counter. He takes my purchases out of the basket and places them into my shopping bag, ringing them up as he goes along. My hands are still shaking and, as I open my purse, I drop a couple of pound coins as I take them
out. The sight of them rolling under the counter makes me want to cry again.
‘Don’t worry,’ Graham says quickly. ‘I’ll fish them out later. Look, I can lock up and give you a lift down the road if you like?’
‘Thanks, but it’s not necessary.’ I’m embarrassed enough as it is. I just want to forget today ever happened.
Picking up the plastic bag with my few things in, I turn and walk to the door, feeling the dark-haired woman’s eyes on me. When I get outside, I breathe in deeply. A cloud has passed over the sun and the pikes that were a vivid green earlier are now darkened by shadow. I try to bring back the feeling of calm I had when I walked here only fifteen minutes earlier, but it won’t come. Something is stopping it.
And I know that the something is Ria.
Two
Beth
The house was in darkness when Beth let herself in. Reaching her hand behind the curtain that hung just inside the front door to stop the cold air from coming in, she switched on the light. With any luck, her mum wouldn’t realise how late it was.
‘Mum?’
On the settee, their cat, Wainwright, stretched, his claws catching in the tassels of the cushion he’d been asleep on. Beth bent to stroke his head.