by E. L. Todd
I stared at her for a few seconds, but it seemed like minutes. I took in every inch of her, examining each feature more than once.
“Dibs,” Theo said, looking at her.
I glared at him while a growl escaped my lips. “No. Mine.”
“No, you get the blonde,” he argued.
“Fuck that. I want her.” She was a rare find, like a pearl that had just washed up to shore.
“Hell no. The blonde looks annoying.”
“And you’re annoying—it’s a perfect match.”
“I’m going for it.” He tossed his cup on the carpet, the wasteland of garbage.
I don’t think so. I tossed my cup then moved into the crowd, trying to get to her first. The number of people on the dance floor had increased, and since everyone was so drunk, it was a hassle to get through. I accidentally knocked a girl over, and I had to pick her up because I felt like an ass for slamming into her. When she was back on her feet, I looked for the girl again.
Theo was on the other side of the throng, trying to find her.
I searched for a blue blouse, relying on my peripheral vision to spot it. Nothing. I didn’t see anything. Instead, I looked for the blond girl. I saw her clapping her hands to the beat while she danced.
Theo spotted her at the same moment.
Immediately, we both rushed to her.
“Where’s your friend?” we both yelled at the same time.
She startled then moved back. “What?”
Theo and I both repeated the same question.
“I don’t know.” She was clearly irritated, probably annoyed that both of us preferred her friend over her. “She probably went to the bathroom. I don’t keep tabs.” She rolled her eyes then returned to dancing.
Theo gave me a look then darted down the hall to the bathroom.
I remembered the annoyed look on the brunette’s face. She clearly didn’t want to be at this party. It was obvious she’d been dragged there. And judging by her clothes, she wasn’t dressed for the occasion. I decided to take a risk and headed outside.
I burst out the front door then headed across the lawn. Then I spotted her getting in a taxi down the road.
I panicked. How would I find this girl again? I didn’t even know her name. “Hey, you!” I started chasing after her like a madman. “Wait! Stop!”
She turned to me and gave me a frightened expression.
I didn’t blame her. I probably looked like a psychopath. “Wait! You’re really hot!” Uh, why did I say that?
She got into the car and slammed the door. Then the taxi driver stepped on the gas and took off.
I sighed in sadness, bummed she was gone. But based on my poor moves, I wouldn’t have gotten her anyway. I stayed on the sidewalk and tried to think of a plan. Then I realized her friend was still inside. All the information I needed could be extracted from her.
When I walked back inside, the crowd on the dance floor had disappeared. There seemed to be too much garbage on the floor for anyone to move around. I searched for Theo but didn’t find him anywhere. And the blond girl was gone.
I spotted Cameron. “Hey, have you seen Theo?”
“Theo rhymes with Leo. Like Leonardo DiCaprio.” He laughed then slapped his knee like he’d said something extremely witty and funny.
“Yeah…have you seen him?”
“Nope.” He jerked his arm then splashed beer on his shoes. “Ugh, damn.”
I rolled my eyes then texted Theo. Where did you go? Hot girl left.
I settled for some other girl. Talk to you later.
I sighed then put my phone away. Theo hooked up with some girl and now I was alone. I looked at the girls before me and wondered if I should just settle for a girl I’d already had before.
At that moment, Chelsea, a girl I’d banged several times, came up to me. “I’m headed to the bathroom…” She batted her eyelashes at me then walked away.
I stayed in my spot and thought about the offer. Even though she didn’t excite me that much, she was an easy grab. There would be no effort on my part. We didn’t even need to speak. I shrugged then followed her.
90
Silke
I stood outside my apartment then glanced at my watch.
He was late.
I wore my black pants and thick jacket, something to keep me warm against the nighttime chill. The street was deserted and there weren’t any cars passing. Then I heard the distant sound of a raging muffler. As it got closer, I knew he was just down the road.
A black Harley came down the street then stopped in front of my apartment building. Arsen pulled off his helmet then flashed me a grin. “Sorry I’m late.”
“No, you aren’t.” I walked to him then stopped when I was an inch from his face.
“You’re right. I’m not.” He grabbed the front of my jacket then yanked my lips to his. He crushed his mouth against mine then sucked my bottom lip. I playfully bit his upper lip then pulled away. “Now sit your ass down.”
“Helmet?” I held out my hand.
He handed me his. “Look, I’m a gentleman.”
“No, you aren’t.” I put it on then fastened the clip.
“So, if we crash, you’re okay with me dying?” A playful look was in his eyes.
“It’s your own fault,” I said with an attitude. “You’re the one who crashed.”
He patted the seat behind him. “Shut up and wrap your arms around my waist.”
“You should invest the money on another helmet—since you’re always riding around with so many girls.”
He laughed. “You’re the only one, baby.”
I sat behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist. Then I rested my feet behind his.
“You ready for this?”
“I’m ready for anything.”
We headed to Boston, the wind moving through our hair as we drove on the highway. The lights from other cars were blinding, but that didn’t seem to bother Arsen. I kept my arms around his waist, feeling free and reckless.
When we arrived at the bar, I left his helmet on the handle. “Smooth driving.”
“I know what I’m doing.” He hooked his arm around my waist then we headed inside the smoke-filled room. Pool tables were against the wall and the distinct smell of cheap liquor hung in the air.
“Two shots.” Arsen knocked on the counter. “One for me, and one for my pretty lady.”
I moved to the stool next to him.
The bartender handed us the glasses.
Arsen grabbed his then clinked it against mine. “Bottoms up, lovely.”
I lifted the glass to my lips then downed it. I didn’t make a face or even notice the burn as it went down my throat.
“That’s my girl.”
“We can’t get too drunk,” I said. “Otherwise driving that Harley will be a mistake.”
“It’s called a taxi,” he said. “But don’t worry, I’ll still fuck you the way you like when we get back to my place.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not sure where you get your cockiness from.”
He leaned against the counter, looking like a younger version of James Dean. His dark brown hair was messy in a sexy way, and he had nice shoulders and a muscled chest. He was tall, and I liked tall guys. “It’s from girls like you wanting me all the time.” He accompanied his words with a dark, smoldering look.
I wasn’t sure what I saw in Arsen sometimes. He was a classic bad boy that couldn’t be tamed. He had trouble written all over him. Yet, I couldn’t stay away. “Girls like me?”
“You know, the snooty college girls who want something fun, not those stiff and boring Harvard dudes. Something that will burn out just as quickly as it begins.”
There was a lot more to him than the façade he put on. He tried to act like a jerk, an asshole that only cared about himself, but I knew there was more to him than that. “Maybe girls like me know you can offer a lot more.”
He laughed. “Baby, we both know I can’t.” His eyes scanned the
room and landed on a brunette with big tits. Not caring that I was there or the fact that I could see him, he blatantly checked her out. “She has a nice rack.”
I rolled my eyes. “You’re just doing that to make a point.”
He turned back to me. “I am?”
“Yeah. You’re afraid to get hurt. Someone obviously already broke your heart once. Maybe you can fool everyone else, but you can’t fool me.”
He turned away, watching a group of guys play pool. His hand gripped his glass even though it was empty. Something was going through his mind, but I wasn’t sure what it was. “And why does a beautiful girl like you spend time with me? I’m obviously no good for you. Sounds like someone else had their heart broken. You’re accepting less than what you deserve.”
“No, I’ve never had my heart broken.” I’ve never even had a boyfriend. Finding a guy I was genuinely attracted to was almost impossible. There was always something I didn’t like about them. Ironically, Arsen had a million qualities I didn’t like, but I was still drawn to him like no one else.
“Really?” He seemed incredulous.
“Really.”
“I don’t mind being a heartbreaker, but I really don’t want to be the first one to break yours.” He said it in a serious and threatening way. He turned his blue eyes on me, searching me.
“A true jerk wouldn’t care to begin with.”
“Maybe I’m not the worst guy out there, but I’m certainly not the best. Either way, we both know how this ends. Yet, you keep coming back for more.”
“Maybe I think there’s more to be had.” I tapped the bar. “Another.”
The bartender passed us two more shots.
Arsen drank his without thinking twice about it.
I did the same.
“Silke, there’s not.” He gave me a firm look. “You should find a nice guy who treats you right. That’ll never be me.”
Why couldn’t it be? “Maybe you should try to be that guy.”
He looked away. “No. Sorry.”
I hated myself for being so infatuated with him. In the back of my mind, I knew this relationship was suicide. But in the back of my heart, I hoped he would change for me, that something would happen between us to make him realize he couldn’t be without me, and that if I walked away, he wouldn’t know what to do with himself.
Unable to look at him, I stared at two men who were throwing darts. In my periphery, I saw Arsen staring at my face. He was trying to be discreet about it, but I noticed. He was a paradox. He said the most hurtful things but did the sweetest things at the same time.
“Want to play pool?” he asked.
“Why not?” I left the bar then grabbed a pool stick.
He grabbed his then set the game. After he broke, he dropped in a solid. “You’re stripes, beauty.”
“Alright, beast.” They were playful nicknames we had for each other. He was pretty on the outside, but on the inside, he was an ass—hence, beast. He dubbed me as beauty, saying I had the looks and grace of a queen.
I didn’t agree with it, but it was nice to hear him say it anyway.
We spent the next hour playing until we were down to the last few balls.
“You’re the best girl pool player I know.” He bent at the hip and lined up his shot.
“No, I’m one of the best pool players you know—not the best girl pool player. Knock that sexist shit off.”
He chuckled lightly then made the shot. “My apologies…”
The ball went in the pocket.
Arsen whistled. “It’s getting close…”
I walked to my ball and studied it.
Arsen stood behind me then forced me to bend over. He held the stick over my hands, guiding me. I knew how to play and so did he. He was doing this for an entirely different reason.
“Keep your elbow back.” His lips were at my ear, warm and inviting. “Now line up the shot.” He pressed against my backside, his erection noticeable.
“I know how to play, Arsen.” I kept up my indifference even though I loved anytime his body was close to mine.
“I know.” He pushed against me again. “Just trying to help.” He stepped back, taking his warmth with him.
I made the shot and sank the ball in the pocket. “You got some competition, Arsen.”
“I’ve always had competition.” He gave me a wink then approached the eight ball. “But this is where I win.” He held his stick and prepared to hit the ball.
I walked around him then stood behind him.
“You looking at my ass, beauty?”
“Maybe…”
He chuckled then pulled back his elbow.
Just as he was going to sink the ball, I grabbed his ass and squeezed.
His stick went sideways, and his ball rolled the opposite way he was aiming. He turned around and gave me a playful glare. “That was cheap.”
“All is fair in love and war.”
He grabbed my ass and pulled me close against him. “You want me to take you right here on this pool table? I will.”
“I. Dare. You.” I met his gaze with my own, unflinching and unafraid.
A grin spread his lips. “You drive me crazy, beauty.”
“Likewise.”
He tossed his stick on the table. “Let’s go.”
“We haven’t finished the game.”
“I’ll let you have this one.” He leaned close to me, his cologne evident. “We both know I would have won anyway.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the bar.
One hand was wrapped around my waist while he rocked into me. His face was pressed to mine. He watched the redness flush my face as I bit my lip, stifling my moans so I didn’t piss off his neighbors. I gripped his shoulder and dug my nails into the skin.
He brushed his lips past mine, teasing me while he groaned and moved inside me. “Beauty…”
My lips found his and I gave him a long and hot kiss. The physical chemistry between us was volatile and explosive. I’d never felt the same passion with anyone else. Arsen excited me in a profound way. Just a look made me simmer and groan. I knew he felt the way I did, felt the connection between us that expanded past the physical act of lust.
“Arsen…” My nails were digging him into him so hard they almost drew blood.
He kissed my neck as he continued to move into me. He removed his hand from my waist then gripped one thigh, feeling the smoothness of my legs. His nose was near my ear and I could hear him breathing hard, an occasional moan escaping his lips. The sound excited me just as much as what he was doing to me.
“Come on, beauty…” He thrust into me, making the bed shake. “You’re almost there.” He stared into my eyes, the dark look overcoming his features.
My body clenched up at his words. He was awesome in bed, but he highlighted his moves with words that made my spine shake. Only he could say things like that and pull it off. The fact that he knew the moment I was going to explode before it actually happened was a testament to his skills. With him, I always felt comfortable. I could be open with my sexuality as well as my feelings. I pressed my face into his shoulder while I held on, biting his skin. One arm was around his shoulder and the other was around his waist. I sank my teeth into his skin while my body shook with the tremors that rocked through me. The dynamite was lit, and my skin was burning. A loud moan escaped my lips, and I didn’t hide how good the orgasm felt. It was absolutely wonderful. Even after it faded, the aftershocks still lingered on.
As if he was waiting for just the right moment when I was done, he released a satisfied moan and took his final thrusts inside me. His lips were pressed to my ear, so every sound was amplified. I loved hearing the pleasure in his breath, knowing it was because of me. “Always a pleasure.” He pulled out and disposed of the condom. Then he lay in bed beside me.
He had a small apartment on the bad side of town. Rather than having a big-boy job, he paid the bills by illegally growing weed and selling it. He said he refused to work for the man. I knew he was
never a guy that I would bring home to my parents, but I still wasted my time with him. I had no idea why.
There was a lot more to him than he let on. He was smart, really smart, and he was witty and fun. A lively spirit existed inside him. Since he didn’t play by anyone’s rules, he was free, doing what he wanted when he wanted. He had more compassion than most people I knew, but he tried to downplay it in front of other people. He was determined to be as detached as possible, saying he preferred the life of a bachelor. But I didn’t buy that. There was no way we spent so much time together, had such a great time doing absolutely nothing, for him to want someone else. I guess I was reading between the lines rather than listening to the words out of his mouth. One day it would ruin me. But that didn’t keep me away.
He lit a cigarette then handed it to me.
I took it then inhaled a puff.
He lit his own then leaned against the headboard, letting the smoke slowly escape his lips. Even when he did that, he looked sexy.
I wasn’t a regular smoker. I just did it in social situations. It took the edge off, but I never let it turn into an addiction, not like the kind I had for Arsen.
His hand rested on my thigh while he stared at the ceiling. He took another hit then let the smoke dissipate from his lips. “Nothing like a drag after an orgasm.”
I inhaled mine and remained silent.
His room was cluttered with random clothes, posters of rock bands, and acoustic and electric guitars. The place was never clean. His kitchen was even worse. Dirty dishes were constantly in the sink, and his refrigerator held food that had been expired for months.
“Can I sleep here tonight?” I asked. Arsen attested he didn’t do sleepovers. It wasn’t his thing, apparently. But he let me do it.
“I don’t want to wake up early and drive you back.”
“Well, do you want to take me now?” I knew the answer even if he didn’t say it.
“You have a point.”
“You can stay at my place, you know.” It was hard to get him to stick around.
“Nothing to do in Cambridge.”