by A. P. Moraez
Logan’s grin had morphed into a subtler smile. It remained there as the man brought Ash’s hand from his chest to right in front of his face and caressed the finger Ash’s engagement rested in. “Nothing,” he said, but his eyes said otherwise.
“What?” Ash repeated, poking Logan’s nose with his index finger.
Logan laughed and slapped his finger away, then pressed a kiss to Ash’s ring finger and let go of his hand to wrap that arm firmly around Ash’s waist again, bringing them flush together. Under the covers, their cocks touched, both hard now, and Ash suppressed a groan when Logan — on purpose, he suspected — rolled his hips.
They were so close, noses almost touching, and Ash lost himself in Logan’s eyes for a moment, until Logan leaned in and pressed his lips gently to Ash’s lips. Ash closed his eyes and brought his hand to rest on Logan’s cheek. The chaste kiss lasted for several seconds, until Logan leaned back and they were back to gazing into each other’s eyes.
“It’s just nice,” Logan said in a half-whisper, “being able to sleep late and being just us here, by ourselves. No security, no agents. Just us.” That little smile was back on his lips. “It’s nice seeing you all worked up about something inconsequential like a fucking suit, not because there’s someone trying to kill us.”
Ash nodded as he caressed Logan’s cheek gently. “I know. I still can’t believe it, and it’s been almost a whole month.”
A shadow crossed the sapphires, and then Logan was on top of him, their fronts touching everywhere. He propped his weight on his forearms next to Ash’s head and just studied him, as if in doubt about what to say. And he smelled sooo good. Ash wanted to spend the whole day like this: in bed, together, no suits.
“I love seeing you happy,” Logan finally said after a few moments in the silence of the bedroom. “Happy, safe, content.” He leaned down and pressed a brief kiss to Ash’s forehead. “If there’s just one thing that I could do for the rest of my life, I’d choose being able to see you smile and laugh every day, Ash Reid. I wanna give you the whole world. Every day.”
And what did one say to that? Where did he come up with stuff like that? Ash’s stomach was fluttering like it was infested by flies.
“I want the same,” Ash said. “For you, I mean. Not for me. That’d be narcissistic as hell.” He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to smite the awkward away. When he opened them, Logan was studying him with sparkling sapphires, that idiot grin back. “I want you to be happy too, always. That’s what I mean.”
Logan leaned down and Ash still felt his grin on his mouth when Logan assaulted his mouth and finally dropped his whole weight on top of him, pressing him against the mattress, just the way he knew Ash loved.
They kissed and kissed, and Ash was almost saying to hell with the soreness at his back side and begging for the man to fuck him for the two or so hours they still had to spare before having to go out, but Logan had other ideas.
“Come on,” Logan said, leaning back, breathing heavily. He pulled Ash up with him and, to Ash’s surprise, lifted Ash on his arms and started carrying him to the bathroom.
“Logan, put me down!” he squealed. “I’m too heavy for this.”
Logan snorted. “You? Heavy? Since when?”
In just a few moments, Ash was being deposited with the utmost care in the Jacuzzi that occupied the middle of the spacious room.
“Stay here,” Logan said as he turned on every one of the ten plus faucets and dropped two bath bombs in. “I’m bringing you a little snack. It’s still too long until dinner for you to go with nothing. And I feel you’re gonna need it today.”
“I’m gonna need what?” Ash asked, beyond perplexed, as Logan’s naked, gorgeous ass disappeared under the archway to the bathroom. “Logan!” he cried, “Why would I need whatever it is you meant?” Logan just started whistling and ignored him completely. “Logan!” he tried again. “Logan!”
Ash adjusted his too-expensive-to-his-liking suit as he exited the Lexus. Logan had parked behind Peter’s car, close to Tom’s front door. In just a moment he had rounded the car and was taking Ash’s hand on his.
They knocked at the doors and it wasn’t long before a very pregnant, very golden Cass — followed close by a very hipster Peter — received them with... with the weirdest face ever.
“What happened?” Ash shot, chill running down his spine, “Is everything okay?” He clasped his sister’s upper arm. “Is it the baby?”
“Uh, what?” Cass said, throwing a tremulous smile at her boyfriend. “What you mean? We’re all fine,” she said, beaming at him, natural as her golden hair color for the day. “Everything is fine,” she finished with an exaggerated nod. “Isn’t it, darling?” she threw at her boyfriend.
Peter had wide eyes darting from her to Ash and her again as they interacted, hands deep inside his pockets and shoulders almost meeting his ears. “Sure,” he responded. “Of course. Everything is fine. Peachy. Perfect. Peach-perfect.” The man had never — ever — had such a toothy grin on his face; not that Ash had seen anyway.
Ash caught the tail-end of a scowl when he looked up to see what Logan’s reaction was being to all of it. The man quickly schooled his expression, though, and brought his warm hand to the small of Ash’s back.
“Since when do you call that one darling?” Ash demanded of his sister, indicating Peter with a jut of his chin.
“Since... since always.” Cass frowned, blushing. She cleared her throat. “We’re just happy for you two,” she said, fanning herself, “that’s all.” She threw another weird-ass look at her boyfriend and took a step back. “Come on in. It’s getting colder by the minute. It won’t do for you two to catch a cold on your engagement party day.”
Logan and Ash complied and Ash winced as his eyes adjusted to the lights. The so-called party would be taking place upstairs. It was a Sunday and, as such, O’Farrell’s didn’t open to the public, but Martha had insisted on keeping things cozy and as normal as possible upstairs. And thank God for that — and thanks to Martha, of course, for knowing him so well. She knew he didn’t like too much fuss and different. Especially on his account.
“Everyone here already?” Logan asked as they followed the couple toward the doors that led to the stairs.
“Yep,” Cass squealed, and man why was she so freaking weird today? Was it her pregnancy? Did all pregnant women suddenly turn a little bit coocoo when approaching the half point of having a creature developing inside their bodies? “Jeff got here more or less an hour ago. Everyone is just waiting upstairs.”
They’d had a bit of a delay. Logan’s fault for not knowing how to control himself and making them spend ten precious extra minutes on mutual blowjobs after their shower.
Cass and Peter threw them another one of those wide-eyed glances before they shot upstairs ahead of them. Their shoes were brand-new and they hadn’t seen much more than Logan’s underground garage, the floor of the Lexus and O’Farrell’s itself, so Ash thought it’d be okay to keep them on before following the crazy couple.
He was about to lift his foot to take on the first step when Logan stopped him with a gentle but firm grip on his upper arm and turned Ash around so they could face each other. Ash lifted an eyebrow, confused. And why were the sapphires so watery and deep? What did it mean, that fleeting way they shot upstairs before locking on Ash again? And why did he just lick his lips, like he was nervous? Logan was never nervous about anything. Ash was the person in the relationship who freaked out and got all the air out of his lungs, now and then, because of anxiety. All this unusual vibe of them was weirding him out. This was just supposed to be a fancied-up version of the traditional O’Farrell bimonthly gathering, nothing more.
Logan studied him for one more moment before that hand he had clasping Ash’s arm slid up over his shoulder and stopped on the column of his neck. Ash leaned into the touch instinctively. He loved Logan’s warm, big hand, when he touched him like this. Like Ash was precious to him.
“You remember
what I told you before, right?” Logan asked. “That I’d give you the world, every day, if I could?”
Ash nodded, his stomach fluttering. What the hell was going on? He threw a nervous look upstairs, but then Logan brought that hand that’d been on his neck to cup his cheek and guided Ash’s eyes back to him.
“I love you,” Logan said, then leaned down and pressed a quick, gentle kiss to Ash’s lips. “I love you more than anything.”
“You’re scaring me.”
“Go ahead,” Logan said, voice low and hesitant.
“Why?” Ash asked, nerves eating at him. “This is our party. We should go together.”
“Trust me. You’ll wanna go first for this. I’m right behind you.”
Eyes narrowed, Ash shook his head more to himself than to Logan himself, and spun around. He climbed the stairs hesitantly, afraid of what he’d see at the end.
The small foyer that blocked the view to the ample living room and kitchen beyond was empty, and that gave him the creeps by itself. By this time, Jeff was normally already here, assaulting him with his hour-long bear hugs and giving him hell. This time, eerie silence. Well, eerie silence but for a few hushed whispers that, to his trained musician ears, sounded like the beginning of a song he wasn’t sure he wanted to hear.
He rounded the corner and turned to see the room filled with his family but… but they were all standing, eyes glued to him. But it wasn’t just them. Everyone had come. Duke, Henry, Diana. They were all the first ones Ash saw, all in this corner next to the top of the stairs. The weather was turning more agreeable now that February was coming to an end. Agreeable to Hoofslope’s standards, of course, but at least the snows were, for the most part, gone. Both Duke and Henry were wearing what Ash had come to describe as their classic bad-boy outfit: jeans, leather jackets over Henleys, heavy-duty boots. Diana was a looker, though. All high-heels and fancy red dress that did wonders to her bronze skin and platinum hair. Her makeup was, as always, flawless.
“Hey! I didn’t know if you guys would make it!” Ash hugged all of them tight, having missed them more than he thought he would. And yes, even Diana got a hug, even though she flinched a little from the surprise of it.
Duke punched him lightly in the arm once he stepped back. “Wouldn’t miss it, kid,” he said. “Especially because Logan would probably kill us if we did.”
They shared a laugh, and it didn’t escape Ash’s eyes how Diana clasped both hands in front of her and fidgeted, eyes like saucers, glued to his every move, and then… then they darted to somewhere behind him, before quickly going back to Ash himself. Diana wasn’t a person who fidgeted.
Exasperated, he spun around to see the rest of his family. He barely registered Cass and Peter, standing side by side, hugging each other by the waist. Or Jeff holding Trav in his arms, his other beefy arm around his wife. Or Tom and Martha standing side by side a few feet away from them. Or Billy, standing a few feet apart, Logan’s third pair of gifted shades in place, arms crossed over his chest as he leaned against the wall. Even Grace and Lauren, to Billy’s left, didn’t hold his attention. No… because his eyes landed on the old lady in the middle of them, standing there with tears in her eyes, hands clasped in front of her baby-blue dress with the pattern of baby-pink flowers. And when the right memories slotted in place and the right synapses clicked, Ash made some sort of sound he couldn’t even describe and fell to his knees. He’d brought his hand to his mouth and it was shaking as much as the rest of him. Because this had to be a dream. Things like this didn’t happen outside of fairy tales where the hero’d win against the villain and then everything would end perfectly. His life wasn’t like that. Nothing was ever real and things just didn’t even get close to perfect endings. But she was there, under the fluorescent lights, as elegant and noble as ever, now all-white hair pinned in a bun on top of her head.
Ash was shaking his head and trying to deal with the stream of tears that had burst through his eyes and wouldn’t stop coming. And she came to him. She came to him and delicately, like an angel — his angel — dropped to her knees. Her soft, light hands felt heavenly against his skin. Soft, aery, like a dream.
“Ms. Baker?” he let out in a choked voice, because how, because who; how. “Is it really you?”
“I’d never think,” she said, voice equally cracked, “that you’d turn out so handsome, my boy. Look at you.”
In retrospect, he probably shouldn’t have jumped and attacked an old lady — that now was probably in her mid-sixties or — the way he did, like if he didn’t jump and hug her with all he had in that moment, he would never get another chance. But that was exactly what he did. And she hugged him right back, both kneeling over Martha’s soft Persian rug.
Ash couldn’t form words, his world suddenly reduced to whimpers and tears and snot and hugs and the feel and touch and smell of a woman that’d once meant the whole world to him; someone he thought he’d never get to see again. Never get to thank in person again for everything she’d done to him.
It felt like hours and hours passed before he made himself let her go. She’d probably been smart and put on water-proof makeup before coming here, because her face, albeit more wrinkled than he remembered, was wet with tears, yeah, but not one single trace of runny mascara.
“I can’t believe you’re here,” Ash said, probably looking way worse than she was. He lifted his arm to clear a bit of tears and snot. “I didn’t—” He had to stop himself and take a big breath. His heart was beating so fast, it felt like he was about to die. To die. “I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.”
“That one came to visit me a few days ago,” she said, shaky index finger pointing to some point above Ash’s shoulder, kind eyes luminescent. “We had a long talk.”
Ash took a quick peek at where she was pointing. Logan was standing with his arm wrapped around Diana, and she hadn’t been as careful as Ms. Baker, judging by the clear dark path the eyeliner had left on its path down her cheeks. Logan was smiling a trembling smile at them both, bottom lip between his teeth, sapphires melting.
“It didn’t take much convincing to get me to come, though.” Ash brought his eyes back to her. “I can’t believe how beautiful you are,” she repeated, then brought him into a new hug.
He squeezed her with all his might — which, again, he probably shouldn’t have done, but he wasn’t thinking clearly right then.
“I’m so sorry,” Ash found himself saying. “I’m so sorry I left. I shouldn’t have left. I shouldn’t have left without saying goodbye in person. I felt horrible. It was horrible. What happened after, it was—”
“Shhhh.” She was squeezing him and smoothing his back, pretty much how she’d done all those years ago, every time he’d run to her in seek of a little bit of love and solace, since he could never get that at home. “I know. Logan told me everything. It’s past now. It’s over.”
And the knowledge that she knew had him bursting out in tears all over again. And for several minutes everyone was crying and sniffing and sobbing. It was a mess. Ash wouldn’t have traded it for anything.
“Come on,” she said after they finally broke off their hug, “my knees are on the verge of suing me.”
Ash helped her stand up and they just... just smiled at each other, and it was bizarre that he was taller than her now. She’d always seemed so tall and powerful and solid. Now she stood a couple inches shorter than him. That austere, wise aura that she’d always had about her was still there, though. One more thing about her beside her floral dresses that apparently hadn’t changed even after all those years.
She grabbed him by the hand and started leading him to one part of the couch. “Martha here has been telling all sorts of stories,” she said, taking a seat and bringing him to seat at her side. “About your concerts and about a certain owl that had you running around on the streets.”
Ash gasped. “It was the middle of the night, okay? Owls are scary.”
Everyone shared a laugh as they started taking t
heir places all around him. Even Trav, the poor little sweet boy, was wiping tears off his little eyes.
“You should tell me your version, then,” Ms. Baker said, adjusting her dress. “I wanna know everything.”
And that’s what he did. Over the whole delicious meal Martha had prepared for the night, surrounded by family and friends and holding the hand of the love of his life, he told her all the stories she wanted to hear.
Dinner was excellent, as to be expected. Martha had prepared a delicious pasta-bake with her special Guinness sauce that no one but her knew how to prepare. For dessert, she’d made chocolate pudding. Ash was so stuffed he’d had to loosen-up his belt after dinner.
Almost an hour had passed since then and, even though everyone knew it was a special occasion for Logan and him, they made sure not to bring too much attention to it, and Ash was thankful. Of course, they’d still taken turns to take photos with him and Logan as a couple, and it’d melted Ash’s heart when Trav asked to take a picture with them alone and Logan lifted him into his arms before the boy could even ask. They’d been steadily forming a strong bond, him and his uncle Logan, over the months, and just thinking about it got Ash’s stomach all funny.
At some point, they’d all moved along back to the living room, where Tom promptly asked for Jeff’s help to move all the couches and chairs closer to the walls to make room for dancing. Billy, already seeming completely integrated to the crazy family and the mechanics of the home, plugged his phone on the sound system and settled on a playlist filled with all the ABBA songs that Martha was addicted to.
It was a good choice for dancing, if Ash was being honest. Everyone was having a great time, even Diana, who was dancing with Henry on a spot next to the window.