by Susan Bliler
“Take your time,” Tallius offered. “No rush.”
Fffffuck! she mouthed and frowned at the bubbles on her knees. Why did he have to be so nice? Why was he making hating him so hard?
Forcing her thoughts from Tallius, she took a deep breath and sunk under the water.
In ten minutes she was scrubbed shiny as a new penny and redressed in the pj’s she’d had on earlier. Sitting on the lid of the toilet, she was brushing out her hair when a wave of exhaustion slammed into her.
Dropping her heavy arms, Mira lowered her chin and took a deep breath. Her wolf was back, Tallius had coaxed her out, but it was like she kept peeking in and out, coming and going. She was skittish right now, which meant Mira was only feeling infrequent peaks of strength. Right now, it felt like she’d bottomed out. Feeling physically weak like this was new for her. She worked hard, stayed in shape, and ate healthy to maintain fighting form. Being drained like this was foreign territory. Trying another bolstering breath, she chuffed a laugh at her “fighting form.” Right now, she doubted she’d be able to fight her way out of a wet paper bag.
“Mira?” Tallius’s voice sounded from just outside the door.
“Yeah.” She sounded tired even to her own ears. “Be right out. I need a minute.”
The brush she was holding slid from her fingers and clattered to the floor.
She whispered, “Shhhhit!”
Tallius’s voice was urgent when he said, “I’m coming in!” He didn’t wait for a response, just shoved the door open and stared at her with wide eyes. “You okay?”
Lifting her head, she let it fall back as she closed her eyes a moment. “Yessss,” she lied.
“You know”—Tallius’s tone was full of reproach—“you can ask for help when you need it.”
She didn’t get the chance to ask. She didn’t get the chance to do anything before he bent and tried to scoop her up. Head snapping up, Mira shouted, “Stop!”
Tallius stilled, eyes wide.
“You’re hurt,” she fumed. “Don’t make it worse by trying to cater to me.”
“I’m not hurt. I twisted my knee in the avalanche. It’s better.”
He made to lift her up again, but she shoved at his chest. “Don’t!” When he stilled, she glared up at him. “And don’t lie to me.”
“Mira,” he snarled, “I am not . . .”
“Carrying me around anymore,” she finished for him, shoving at his arms until he backed away from her. “What you can do is help me . . . if you’d like.”
Mira watched Tallius frowning down at her and thought he’d refuse, but after tense minutes he huffed out a breath and grunted, “Fine!” Making a bowing gesture, he said, “May I help you, Mira?”
With a soft snort, she hid a grin and said, “Yes, please.”
Tallius bent and helped her to her feet. Mira struggled not to sway because she knew she’d just won a small victory, and that it would be snatched back the instant Tallius thought she wasn’t up to the task. Leaning heavily on his arms that circled her, she glanced up and asked, “Is this okay?”
“It’s fine, Mira. I’m fine, Mira. I could carry you to Timbuktu and be fine. But if you need this, I’ll give it to you.”
When she snuck another glance up at him, he looked resigned to the fact.
“I’m not here to bully you,” he continued. “I’m just trying to help. It’s all I’ve been doing from the moment you got here.”
And she thought about that. He’d been patient with her, and him not forcing his will now was something new. She spent a lot of time around Alpha males, and they didn’t like being told no, especially when their strength was at question. Tallius wasn’t like that. He wasn’t puffing up his chest and putting himself at jeopardy just to show her how strong he was. He backed off when she asked him to back off. He let her try to prove herself when she wanted to, and it was refreshing.
As she shuffled out of the steamy bathroom, goose bumps blasted up her arms the second they hit the bedroom. They lingered until she and Tallius stepped into the warm sitting room.
Helping her get settled on the couch, Tallius bent and lifted her legs onto the soft leather before he pulled a blanket off the back and covered her legs and lap. Turning for the kitchen, he slammed to a halt when she turned sideways and slid her feet to the floor. Jamming a finger at her, he barked, “Stay on that couch, Mira. I fucking mean it!”
His tone was grating, but the warning in his words had her stilling. He’d let her walk on her own to the living room. He’d been willing to give her that, so she was willing to give him this.
Tallius stalked into the kitchen, and Mira watched him over her shoulder until her neck started to ache. Turning, she lifted her legs back onto the couch and side-eyed him. He got a tray from somewhere before shoving his hands into oven mitts and pulling a plate from the oven and putting it on the tray followed by a glass of milk, a napkin, silverware, and more of the garlic bread he’d made for dinner.
Coming back into the living room with the tray, he said, “I kept your food warm for you. You need to eat.”
She wanted to argue but didn’t have the energy, so she just shot him a scathing look as he settled the tray on her lap. Grabbing the garlic bread, she bit off a huge chunk and glared up at him while she chewed.
With a pleased grin, he murmured, “Good girl.”
And even that simple statement had her hackles up because deep down, some part of her was glad that she’d pleased him. Fuck! Tearing her eyes from his, she ripped off another hunk of bread and frowned at her plate. Around the bite, she ordered, “Talk.”
When Tallius just frowned down at her she swallowed the food in her mouth and demanded, “Distract me. Tell me something.”
“Like what?”
Dropping her eyes to her spaghetti, she swirled some noodles onto her fork. “Like why you got the room with the jetted tub while I got the one with the shitty shower.”
“When you first got here, I tried to tell you that I thought you’d like that room better, but nooooo. You were too stubborn to listen to anything I had to say. You thought you were too good to . . .”
Letting her head slump back, she breathed, “Jesus, Tally. I-I don’t have the energy for this right now. Can you just not . . . not poke at me?” For some dumb reason, stupid tears pricked the back of her eyes and she had to keep her eyes closed tight to keep from exposing her emotion.
***
Mira was trying to act tough, but the second Tallius had stepped into the bathroom, he’d felt the exhaustion that was plaguing her. It was odd. He’d never felt another shifter’s emotions before, but he could feel Mira’s in the bathroom, just like he could feel them now. She was feeling super vulnerable, and that coupled with her weakness had concern washing away his cocky grin. Mira’s face had gone pale again, and one sniff told him that she’d overdone it. It made him feel like shit for teasing her and even worse for letting her walk herself to the sitting room. Quickly, he removed the tray from her lap and lifted her off the couch.
“Wh-what are you doing?” When she peeked her eyes open, she was staring at him in confusion, and to be honest, he was a little confused too.
“I . . . I don’t know. What do you need?”
With a small huff and a shake of her head, she breathed, “Put me down.”
He did, and once she was settled back on the couch, he stepped back with a muttered, “Sorry. I just . . . How do I fix you, Mira? Tell me what it is you need.”
“I’m fine,” she said, and then amended it to, “I’ll be fine. I just need to rest.”
But the frequency and length of her naps was really starting to worry him. Honestly, when he scented her wolf’s return earlier, he thought things would be getting better.
Kneeling beside Mira, he placed a hand on her shoulder and applied a little pressure before he said, “Let me see.”
She glanced at him before she sighed and sat forward.
Lifting the back of her shirt, he eyed her bruise. It wa
s still there, but now it was a deep red, almost the color of strawberries. It didn’t tell him shit. He didn’t know if the color meant she was getting better or getting worse. Lowering her shirt, he asked, “How you feeling?”
“Tired.”
“Aside from that!” he growled in frustration. “I need more than that, Mira.”
“She’s gone again,” she breathed almost mournfully. Lowering her head, she whispered, “Without her, I feel like half a person. Like half of me. I feel like that bruise on my back has leaked into my soul. I feel . . . wrecked.”
Her admission had Tallius swallowing down the emotion that thickened his throat. His wolf had never abandoned him before, and just even thinking about being without his beast left him feeling hollow. Grabbing her hand, he gave it a squeeze and promised, “She’ll be back. She’s just skittish right now.”
Mira’s head lifted, and she blinked at him with some unknown emotion on her face.
“I was just thinking that in the bathroom,” she admitted quietly.
“Well, you’re right. She’s had a rough go, but you’re as tough as they come, beautiful Beta. Give her a minute.”
Mira ducked her head, and it had Tallius scratching absently at the back of his head as he glanced at the table then back to her. He didn’t know why he kept using terms of endearment with her. It just felt natural, but once the words were out they left him feeling awkward. Standing, he said, “If you think you’re done eating, I’ll move you to my room. It’s yours now.”
“Keep your room. I’ll take the couch. I don’t plan on being up here much longer. Soon as my energy comes back, I’m heading out. I just need a minute.”
“You need more than a minute,” he snapped impatiently. “You were buried in an avalanche. You’re hurt, Mira. Admit it or not, it won’t change. You’re not ready to leave, and I’m not letting you.”
He knew that last part would provoke her, and it did.
“Let me?” Her voice was deadly calm, but he could see the first hint of color coming back as her cheeks flared with a weak flash of anger.
Just as fast as it had come, though, the color quickly faded and had Tallius worried that he’d made a mistake by taunting her too soon. He hadn’t meant to provoke her.
“Just rest, woman! I don’t want to fight.” He jerked his thumb toward the door. “I’ve got several days’ worth of digging still to do! You can’t leave if we can’t get out.” She opened her mouth, but he held up his hands. “Mira! Give it a rest.” Lifting both hands, he raked roughly at his hair. “Ffffffuck! I’m worried too.”
“I’m not worried,” she bit out.
Tallius shot her a look. “No one knows what happened up here, and I don’t know about you, but my Alpha trusts my judgment and my timing. He’ll give it a good week before he sends anyone up to look for me.” It must have been the same for Mira because she swallowed hard and lowered her head.
“We’re gonna get through this, and we will get out of here, but we’re gonna have to work together. And for now, that means you doing as I say because I can’t worry about you and deal with the mountain of snow on top of us.”
“You got us in the cabin somehow,” she countered. “Why can’t we just get out the same way?”
“And then what?” he asked. “I could shift and make it down the mountain, but what about you?” He tossed a hand in her direction. “You’re hurt, Mira. You wouldn’t make it far.”
“Then go without me and bring help back.”
He couldn’t mask the incredulity in his tone. “What? You begged me not to leave you alone, and I’m not going to!”
“It’d take you less than a day to get down to some help.”
Her sudden change of heart at being left alone told him that maybe, just maybe, she was starting to feel some of the connection to him that he was feeling toward her, and it was scaring her just as much as it was scaring him. Lowering his chin, he growled, “I am not leaving you here alone, Mira! When we leave, we’re doing it together. End of discussion.”
Stalking into his room, he slammed the door and then disappeared into the bathroom, which was a mistake. Mira’s scent filled the space and had his balls drawing up tight even as he balled his hands into white-knuckled fists. She was going to be the death of him. The avalanche didn’t need to do the job because Mira was going to fucking kill him either with her stubbornness or with the worst case of blue balls he’d ever experienced.
Stripping quickly, he bypassed the tub and blasted on the shower in the corner before stepping in and beating his shit like it owed him something. He didn’t even bother stifling the groan that wrenched its way up his throat and tapered into a growl as he envisioned Mira’s wet, slick body pressed up against the shower stall, her parted legs wrapped around his hips. Just the thought of exploding deep inside her had him erupting like a fucking volcano.
Chapter 13
Jamming double middle fingers at Tallius’s bedroom door, Mira inwardly screeched. Her anger jerked her wolf to the fore where she paced just beneath the surface. Coarse fur brushing the underside of Mira’s skin made it feel like she was being pet from the inside out. It was comforting and terrifying. Every time her wolf surged forward, Mira wondered if it’d be the last time. Lowering her hands, she quietly whispered, “I should have taken better care of you. I’m sorry.”
Silently, her wolf slunk away, receding deeper inside her until Mira was left cold and alone with a hollow feeling centered in the middle of her chest. She was fucked and she knew it. She needed to get back to Fury territory to nurse her wolf back to form, but she wasn’t getting off this mountain, not anytime soon. It meant she wasn’t getting away from Tallius either, and she wanted away from him like she wanted her next fucking breath. He made the air thin. He made her head hurt. He made her heart ache with the memories of her old pack and their devastation at his hands. Yeah, he’d been following his Alpha’s orders, but so what? It didn’t change anything. He’d admitted that he’d suggested attacking when her FourClaws were at their most vulnerable, and for that alone she’d never forgive him. Never!
Yet . . . Swallowing thickly, she couldn’t deny some underlying compulsion to understand his motives. Everything with him was so fucking contradictory that it left her reeling. She wanted to hate him and she wanted not to.
Sliding down onto the couch, she pulled the blankets up to under her chin and winced as she rolled onto her side. Her muscles were sore like she’d worked out after being on a long hiatus. Her back was super tender, but she ignored the pull and resulting ache that ripped through her when she drew her knees up and curled into a little ball. She felt so alone. Tears pricked the back of her eyes, and without anyone there to see, she let them come.
She’d had a plan when she’d come here. She was going to confront Tallius. She was going to show her wolf that he was just a shifter like any other. She was going to prove to herself that he wasn’t the dark menace her nightmares had built him into. Then she was going to go on vacation and buy herself lots of girly cocktails with olives and umbrellas and too much alcohol as a reward for her bravery. But none of that was happening. Her plan of putting the memory of Tallius to bed once and for all would be impossible now. She wouldn’t lie to herself and pretend she wasn’t attracted to him, because she was. Hell, attracted might even be too weak a word for what she was feeling. Part of her prayed it was some fucked-up form of Nightingale syndrome. He’d rescued her and cared for her, and there’d be gratitude for that regardless of her preconceived beliefs about him. Right?
Sniffing, she used the back of one hand to swipe at her cheek and begged her wolf, “Pleeeease! Please come back? The longer you’re gone, the longer I’m stuck here, and the longer I’m stuck here, the harder it is to hate him.”
And she wanted to hate him. She wanted to remember exactly how she’d felt that night or the day after when her world had been turned upside down.
Aydin told her living in the past wasn’t healthy, but he also encouraged her to use he
r hate to make herself stronger. He didn’t really know what she needed though. No one did, not even her sometimes.
Tomorrow, she promised herself. Tomorrow she’d steel herself and remember why exactly she’d come here. She’d stick to her plan. She’d pick a fight with Tallius if she had to. She’d get him so angry that he’d want her to leave, and then she’d take off. Meeting him here was foolish, but she could still rectify that mistake. It wasn’t too late.
Chapter 14
Tallius barely slept. He kept thinking about Mira out on the couch. He wondered if she was comfortable and warm enough. He wondered if she needed anything. He wanted to go check on her so badly that he had to grind his back teeth together and clench his hands into fists to keep from acting on it. She didn’t want his help. She went out of her way to prove it to him at every opportunity. Arguing with himself about whether he should respect that or not had him up until the room started to lighten with the sunlight that peeked under the door.
Shoving up out of bed, he padded in bare feet to the bathroom, where he pissed, washed his face, brushed his teeth, and then braced his arms on the vanity to glare at himself in the mirror.
“Why can’t you shake her? What’s so fucking special about her that you can’t just accept that she hates you and live with it?”
No answers were forthcoming except for one. Inwardly, a voice echoed through his head, “She is fucking special.” He grit his teeth, and his lip kicked up in a snarl before he shoved away from the mirror and stalked out of the bathroom wearing nothing but his jeans. Snatching his shirt up off the edge of the bed, he shoved his arms into it and pulled it on before he grabbed his socks and thick-soled boots and quickly donned them as well.
Jerking his door open, he expected to find Nora resting on the couch. Instead, she was dressed in ass-hugging jeans, tiny hiking boots, and a soft-looking purple sweater that hung off one bare shoulder. Her suitcase was on the couch and she was zipping it up.
Crossing his arms over his chest, he leaned a shoulder into the doorframe and drawled, “Going somewhere?”