by John L. Monk
That’s when Henry’s eyes lit up.
“Wait a minute,” he said. “Cipher … Now I remember. We were working on a personality for the game. Another god, technically, but merely to allow him certain properties he’d need. He was supposed to be this sort of … I dunno … quest master. You know—urging players to greater glory, hidden treasures, that sort of thing. We scrapped the idea as too unwieldy and created Bernard instead. Oh good lord…”
“What?” I said.
Henry shook his head. “Someone must have put him in anyway. Probably by accident. We were all high as kites in those days.” He chuckled fondly. “If Everlife knew about this, they’d have to fix it.”
Rita blinked. “Wait a minute, you’re a developer! You can reach out the same way Cipher did.”
“If a way to communicate out is in the game now,” Henry said, “it was placed after my time.”
I thought some more. “What if you leave the game? Then you can tell Everlife and come back.”
“I’m stuck here, just like you,” Henry said sadly. “The game’s rigged. Only a very high-level person can get out, and only under a rare and specific set of circumstances. Jaddow discovered this before it was too late and … Oh … Hmm.”
Henry cocked his head as if suddenly realizing something important. His gaze flitted from me to Rita and back again.
“What?” we said in unison.
“This might sound strange,” he said, “but are you two in love, by any chance?”
I swore. “First Jaddow, now you. Why’s my love life so damned important?”
Instead of answering, he looked at Rita. “Do you love this man?”
Rita nodded. “Yes.”
“You’d do anything for him? No matter how painful?”
“I do that every day,” she said.
Henry turned back to me. “You love your wife too, don’t you?”
“What’s your point?”
Henry hopped down from his perch and said, “Ethan, I need you to excuse me while I talk to Rita in private. Please step out and give us both a moment.”
I started to protest, and Rita said, “It’s all right. I don’t mind.”
Henry’s smile was infuriatingly patient.
“Okay, fine,” I said, and stalked out.
Chapter Forty-Seven
Standing in the hall, trying not to feel like a third leg, I checked my game log of the battle with those ghosts and saw they were called “Spectral Wardens.” Killing them had awarded me a mere 15,000 points apiece, which seemed like nothing at all considering I’d lost sixty levels in the span of a minute.
I wondered what would happen if they’d stolen them all. Would I appear on Heroes’ Approach as a new retiree? Or would I die permanently?
The longer I stayed in this world, the more dangerous it got. No wonder Everlife made it so hard to win. If word got out that these worlds were created by sociopathic developers, nobody would come.
There was another door across from me with the name Harvonious Click on it. A curious name, it reminded me a little of Hieronymus Bosch. I wondered if this section was full of game developers, like Henry. Did they all get the same lavish sleeping chambers, or were they differentiated according to personality?
I was about to take a look when I heard Rita scream.
Henry’s door, when I tried it, was locked. I banged on it and shouted, “Dammit, let me in! Leave her alone! Rita!”
The door stayed shut. Rita screamed again, even louder than the first time.
Desperate to get inside, I started casting spells at the door, but every bolt, blast, or beam disappeared like a pebble down a hole.
“Henry!” I shouted, banging some more. “Let me in, or I’ll tell everyone I see exactly how to get here and where your room is!”
A glance down the hall showed the ghosts were back and drifting slowly towards me—hundreds of them moving silently with arms outstretched.
With Rain of Fire still on cooldown, all I had left were a few higher-level area-of-effect spells, but I couldn’t cast them safely anymore. After losing 60 levels—split across three classes—my sorcerer rank had dropped from 180 to 160. Aspect of the Swami was now too high level for me.
I backed against the door—ready to cast anyway—when Henry yanked me through and slammed it behind me.
“Calm down, Ethan,” he said. “She couldn’t do it herself, so she challenged me to a duel to get around the no-PVP flag. That’s why the ghosts came back. Gruesome work, but it’s over now.”
His hands were stained heavily in dark blood that disappeared when it hit the floor. Of Rita, there was no sign.
“Over here,” Henry said and started toward the upturned sarcophagus. “Try not to freak out so much. You’re going to need your wits about you.”
“What did you do to her!” I shouted, rushing him from behind, only to pass through stumbling end-over-end.
Still walking, Henry said, “I can’t hurt you, and you can’t hurt me. Nothing’s changed.”
Resting on the edge of the golden sarcophagus was a bloody lump of …
Oh my god.
It was a human heart. Next to it was a knife.
“Ethan,” Henry said, “if you’ll calm down enough to listen, I’ll tell you where she is.”
I pointed a shaking finger at the heart. “What the hell is that?”
Gently, as if talking to a mental patient, Henry said, “Rita left you a note on the back of Jaddow’s. Read it. Take your time. We have plenty.”
He placed the note next to the heart, stepped away, and sat down on the floor with his legs folded.
I picked it up and started reading.
Dear Ethan,
We had to lock you out so I could do it. Yes, that’s my heart, the only heart I have to give, and I’m giving it to you.
I came here to help you and I’ve done that. When you leave the game, please remember you still have a friend in me. If you decide to return, know that I’ll be here.
That said, I am not a homewrecker. Yes, I love you, but you’re married, and I didn’t honor that the way I should have. I’m sorry to Melody and I’m sorry to you.
Be nice to Henry. My deepest wounds are self-inflicted.
—Rita
I put the note aside and gazed at the heart: dark, glistening, and it smelled like blood.
“Give me your bag,” Henry said.
“Huh?”
“I need your permission,” he said, “or the game will think I’m trying to steal it. Please?”
Numbly, I pulled out the empty-seeming sack. I handed it to him and he placed the heart inside.
Henry wiped his brow with the back of his arm. “The game knows you need it, so reclamation hasn’t kicked in. But it can still rot if it isn’t in a bag. Here.”
“Why do I need this?” I said after he handed it to me.
“In a moment. Are you calmer now? Ready for more?”
“Probably not,” I said, then motioned for him to continue.
Henry squinted at me. “Wow, you messed up good. Why the heck did you put all those points in strength? You’re not a hitter. After level five, you get a quarter the benefit for every point!”
“You can see all that?”
He tapped his head. “Developer perk. Hold on a second, you’ll feel a slight…”
“What?”
“Pain.”
White-hot fire stabbed into my eyes, dropping me squirming on the floor as wave after blinding wave sizzled me from the inside. Then, after what felt like an eternity, it was gone.
“What the hell did you do?” I said, panting on my hands and knees. “I thought you said you couldn’t attack me!”
Henry laughed. “I didn’t attack you. Check your character sheet. I did the same thing for Rita before I cut out her heart.”
I gasped at the changes.
PLAYER LEVEL: 6000
CLASSES: Sorcerer (2000), Diviner (2000), Diabolist (2000)
I checked my spell lists in e
ach class and, sure enough, I had access to every single spell in each class.
Henry said, “You’ve just received close to twenty-four thousand game notifications in the span of ten seconds. They have a faint glow to get your attention, but stacked all at once…” He chuckled. “Guess they got yours, eh? All right then, let’s get your stats out of the way.”
Chapter Forty-Eight
In addition to leveling me up, whatever Henry had done also reset my stat points. He rattled off numbers and I applied them without asking.
“You can do what you want with the last hundred,” he said. “Me? I’d put them in comeliness. But if you don’t mind being ugly, you could add more to vitality. Stay away from strength, though. You have a spell now called Demon Strength. Hmm, what else? Agi’s fun, but a lot of items have that already, and you won’t spend much time naked … unless you’re a truly awful player, of course. Or lucky in love, hah hah!”
Henry launched into a short lecture on various “builds” based on future gear choices, none of which made immediate sense.
“What about the heart?” I said when he stopped for breath.
“Ah, yes,” Henry said. “You have a very special spell now called Greater Gate. Have a look.”
There were two spells available in the Gate series: normal, with no prefix, and Greater. Neither version had been in any of my spell lists. The normal variety was castable by all classes three times a day and would teleport a player anywhere in the first three wards for a single mythereum gem.
The greater version was something else altogether:
Spell Name: Greater Gate
Discipline: Special
Rank Available: Special
Cooldown: Special
Duration: Special
Component Cost: Very Special
Description:
If you’re reading this, you’re a lucky player indeed, because it can only be granted by a developer. Don’t blame us, blame the government. So, if you’re sick of being fried alive, or boiled alive, or pierced by tiny little splinters, simply cast this spell and you’ll be teleported past the nigh-unbeatable Domination, straight to the exit rune.
Greater Gate lasts forever until used. You can only cast it once—ever—so use your head.
Now, because this is Mythian, there’s a catch. You must hold aloft the physical heart of someone you are MUTUALLY in love with. If you don’t love anyone, go out, mingle, and find that special someone for you. Then, when they’re not looking, cut their heart out and leave them forever!
I stopped reading and focused on Henry. “What the hell is wrong with you people?”
“What do you mean?” he said.
“Never mind. So that’s it, huh?”
“Yes,” he said. “You’re leaving now, I hope. I’d rather not be tormented for eternity if I can help it.”
I almost nodded, then remembered he could detect lies just as easily as me.
“That makes both of us,” I said instead—then pointed at his sarcophagus. “Can I help you with that?”
Henry looked at the golden coffin as if for the first time. “Oh, that … Don’t worry about it. It’ll right itself when I go to sleep again.”
“Do you really want to do that?”
“Now more than ever,” he said. “But I’ll tell you what: I’m canceling Rita’s geas. She doesn’t strike me as the sort to send a river of power-hungry noobs my way. Also, if she ever needs me again, she has my permission to wake me up—particularly if it’ll keep me from being tortured for all eternity.” In a stage whisper, he added, “And splinters!”
I smiled politely, held out my hand, and we shook on it.
“I’ll let her know,” I said.
“Before you leave?”
“If I see her again,” I said.
Yes, I had the power to leave the game now, but I still needed to rescue Melody. But before I did that, I thought it wise to get a feel for my new powers.
Once out of the mountain, I cast Godlike Ice Guard. Cold as it was outside, my skin felt downright toasty afterward.
“Greater Seek the biggest dragon in fifty miles!”
The spell required 23,000 mana, but I had more than 200,000 now, and my regeneration was half that per hour.
A beam of light blazed from my hand, and an overlay of a distant location appeared floating in the air. The area in the visual was a burning section of forest, and it was easy to see why: there was an enormous dragon in it spouting fire everywhere. Though red, its skin was so dark as to seem almost black.
Centered at the bottom of the scene was the caption, “16 Miles East.”
“Glintz, I summon you!”
The air filled with the perfumed smell of roses, and a female demon lord with sleek golden skin and feathery black wings slowly materialized about ten feet away. She was quite naked, sporting delicate devil horns, luscious breasts, and everything else.
Ah, but her face…
Saying she was beautiful—though true—would miss the mark. Young men would call her stunning, gorgeous, ravishing, a knockout. I hadn’t felt so young in all my life.
Glintz was both an attack demon and a utility demon. She cost a single mythereum gem to summon, and the description said she flew incredibly fast. However, it hadn’t even hinted at her appearance. Almost like the designers wanted to surprise whoever summoned her.
“What do you command, oh master?” she said in a seductive voice that teased me to distraction.
“Wait a minute, you can talk?”
Glintz gazed at me with a feral intensity. “You’ll find I can do a great many things with my mouth, if you’ll but let me.”
I swallowed hard and tried to clear my head. There was something mesmerizing about her—as if she were a lesser version of Myrialla. At least with the dryad, I could avoid the purple mist by breathing into my bottomless bag.
Shaking my head to clear it, I said, “Is there a way you can, ah … tone down the, uh … attraction? I have to concentrate.”
Glintz made a pouty face. “You’re no fun at all, master.”
A second later and she was no less gorgeous, but I could breathe again.
“Much better,” I said.
“Can I call you Ethan, master?” she said.
“No,” I said, because boundaries were important.
Glintz’s smile turned naughty. “Oh, you prefer master.”
“Fine, call me Ethan,” I said. “Now pick me up—carefully—and fly me where I say to.”
Chuckling, Glintz swept me off my feet into her arms—pressing me against her breasts in the process—and we shot like a rocket into the sky.
Chapter Forty-Nine
Glintz made Rita’s airspeed seem almost turtle-like. In no time at all, we could see the burning forest shown in Greater Seek’s display. A bit longer and we heard the dragon’s roaring.
“It’s a big one, Master Ethan,” Glintz said. “Do you want me to kill it for you?”
Maddening, how everything she said sounded sexual.
“Are you still toning it down?” I said.
“You wanted me to keep suppressing my nature?” she said, laughing. “You have to be more specific. Our kind are deliciously literal.”
I pointed to a clear area about three hundred feet from the beast.
“Land us there. Don’t attack, but if it looks like I’ll lose, save me. Got it?”
“I understand,” she said. “After that, we shall make love on the heat of its carcass!”
I let that pass.
“Stay back here,” I said when we landed.
Glintz smiled and seemed content to wait.
After casting my most powerful personal shield—Godlike Shield 5—I strode into the smoking clearing directly toward the dragon.
“Hey!” I shouted at it. “Get over here, you stupid lizard!”
Though truly massive, the creature moved with the speed of something half its size. It whipped around and speared me with its reptilian gaze. Then, with a roar, it
opened its cavernous maw and bathed me in dragon fire.
My new shield flared silvery-white, wicking the damage away with room to take thirty more blasts with no problem.
From my now-full list, I selected a level 2000 non-series sorcerer spell that cost 10,000 mana and had a two-minute cooldown. It also caused 15,000,000 points of damage. In theory, I could cast twenty of them before running out.
“Soul Rend!” I shouted.
The smoking sky above the dragon split open to reveal a glowing cobalt world beyond. From deep within the rift, a beam of crackling energy smashed the dragon to the ground like a bug, slaying it instantly.
ENEMY DEFEATED, Enormous Red Dragon, 11,000,000 EXPERIENCE POINTS
Yesterday, that many points would have leveled me twice in a row. Today, it was but a tiny drop in a very large bucket. I’d need five billion points to reach level 6001.
My shield was truly amazing, in that it was now healing up—regenerating the damage the dragon had caused. If I wanted even more protection, I could cast Aspect of the Sorcerer, but with a shield like this, who needed it?
Glintz landed at my side a few seconds after the kill.
“Well done, Master Ethan!” she said, bouncing around and driving me crazy.
“Thanks,” I said. “Okay, Glintz, begone. No hard feelings.”
“But we didn’t make love…,” she said as her body faded from sight.
A heavy weight lifted from me, and I took a deep breath. Silently, I promised never to summon Glintz again. The last thing I needed was another temptation in my screwed-up life.
A golden treasure chest lay on the ground next to the defeated dragon, but I left it unopened. With such power at my disposal, there was nothing in it I needed.
The normal-variety Gate spell possessed qualities of my diviner spell, Seek, in that it could take me almost anywhere I wanted, simply by specifying where-to. I considered taking it to find Rita, but held off. She’d done enough already, and I didn’t want to cause her any more pain.