by Eric Vall
“So, um, how long have you been out of the infirmary?” I asked Erin simply. I didn’t want to talk about anything incriminating with my guard dog stalking nearby.
Come to think about it, I hadn’t gotten a chance to get up to the infirmary myself despite everyone insisting I at least get checked out. The truth was I didn’t want a lecture from Meriden about my recklessness. What was even more true was my fear she had changed the same way Petyr had. No one seemed to be quite themselves, like they had all been reset after some traumatic event.
In all fairness, the fall of Hartmire was a tragedy, and everyone had been affected by it somehow. That was okay. People were allowed to feel the pain of loss, confusion, and anger. What didn’t bode well with me was how no one seemed to be talking about it. No one was thinking about changing the precautionary measures that should be taken so another devastating event didn’t take place.
No one besides us wanted to challenge the council.
Why?
“A few weeks now,” Erin answered and drew me out of my dark musings. “Meriden finally said I was fit enough to re-enlist myself for the monster response squad recruits.”
I faltered unintentionally. Simply hearing the phrase made the fact that I was trapped here sting something awful, and there was nothing I could do about it for now but play into whatever agenda Miriam Sharpay had. I’d vowed to figure something out, and I would, but it didn’t take the edge off the initial blow.
“That’s great news.” I smiled at her and hoped she found it convincing. I was proud of her, of course. That much was true, but I was also a little bitter she could get back into the action.
There were a few beats of silence before Erin quietly and discreetly grabbed my hand and made a hard right down a clear hallway. I barely had time to react before we were both sprinting, and we made another hard right before we dipped into a recessed door labeled ‘roof’.
I could hear my guard’s footsteps as he ran after us, and I caught a glimpse of him through a small window in the door as he checked the hallway we had run down. He barely skimmed over the door, however, and moved on with his search elsewhere.
Erin smirked in victory and motioned for me to keep quiet as we climbed the stairs to the top. It was a long climb, but it was worth it to get away from the guards for a little while.
Once we reached the top, the two of us burst into laughter as we stood overlooking the courtyard. This wasn’t the first time I’d been on a roof with a girl since coming to the Academy. In fact, I vividly remembered kissing Layla on the roof that overlooked the boys’ bathhouse.
Ah, good times.
Erin and I settled on the edge and allowed our legs to dangle over the side. The breeze of late summer brushed past my face and tossed her hair gently. It felt nice. It wasn’t outside of these walls, but it was the most amount of freedom I’d felt in weeks.
“I … overheard Nia and Layla,” Erin started now that we were alone, “and I know you were all suspended from the monster response squad list because of the council.”
Ouch. When she put it like that, it definitely didn’t feel good.
“Yeah,” I replied solemnly, “but hey, we should focus on our studies, right? After all, we’re still first year students. There’s a lot we could learn still.”
I tried to look on the bright side and keep an open mind for now, but knowing there was something wrong, something amiss in the world while I was trapped here under the watchful eye of the council didn’t sit well with me. It made the urge to leave and be a hero to the people burn inside of me.
“You’re trying,” Erin said with an understanding smile, “and that’s commendable, but it’s okay that you’re upset.”
I sighed. She’d really seen through me easily. Perhaps I’d put too much stock in my ability to hide my emotions. Clearly, that wasn’t working out for me.
“I have to do something,” I said with a bit of frustration. “There’s so much more going on than I really think I’m ready for. All of these politics, and then there’s rifts destroying Enclaves, a demonic angel monster with an agenda I can’t even begin to fathom … and that’s not even half of it. If I'm here and not finding out the truth of what’s going on, then what was it all for? Why did I bother hunting for ciphers and books and spend days researching what everything means if I can’t do anything about it?”
I had unintentionally spilled my heart out to Erin, who listened with nothing but understanding eyes and kindness in her heart. She considered me for a moment and even crossed her arms as she pondered.
“So, do something,” she said simply.
I balked at her, then laughed.
“Why didn’t I think of that?” I asked with a bit of dryness. I knew she was trying to help, so maybe that wasn’t fair, but of course I knew I should do something.
“You’re wondering what to do?” she asked, and I nodded. “Well, that’s not as simple, but the harder you think about it, the more you’re going to drive yourself crazy.”
I took in her words and let them stew with me for a moment. I knew she was right. I knew the answer would eventually come to me, but I had a patience problem when it came to authority, and I wanted to fix it now.
“What would you do?” I asked her quietly.
Erin stared long and hard at me as though she were examining every line and contour of my face, and I squirmed under her scrutiny.
“Well,” she started as she brushed her orange bangs from her eyes, “I would wait for the opportunity to present itself, and then do everything I could to see my ambitions realized. Everything has a place and a time, and if what you said about the world changing is true, then it is only a matter of time before you’ll get to shine and fight back at what’s holding you down. I guess what I’m saying is you might have had a setback, but you’re a fighter, Gryff. You’ll know when the time is right to make a move, but in the meantime, you have to be patient.”
A slow grin spread across my face. Erin was right. I was overthinking this ordeal. It was a shitty situation for now, but if things were as bad as I feared they were getting, then the chance to act on it would come sooner rather than later. I just needed to take the time to form a better plan of action that didn’t involve flying by the seat of my pants. Sure, that was my specialty, but there was no harm in taking the time to have something to set in motion once the opportunity did arise.
“Have you always been this smart?” I asked Erin as I smiled at her cheekily.
“Maybe.” She shrugged with a tilted smile, and I was sure it was the cutest thing I would see all day.
Seeing Erin smile like she hadn’t spent months in recovery in the infirmary, well, it warmed my heart, and perhaps made it skip a little. It was nothing short of dazzling, and I couldn’t help but be swept away in how the sunlight caught her hair. Erin looked like the embodiment of fire and passion rolled into something sweet.
My fingers danced along the edge of the building and found hers. Her skin was soft to the touch, and she was much more pale than I was, even without the sickly glow that had accompanied her for the last few weeks. Now, she had a different type of glow. Erin was like a beacon of hope and positivity in a place where everything just seemed to be getting more and more shitty.
Our fingers laced together, and my heart slammed into my ribcage. My pulse jumped at such a small amount of affection, and I suddenly wanted to hug her again.
But something happened then, a spark, perhaps, and I instead wondered what it would be like to kiss Erin, and not as an excuse to offer her my summoning magic. I hoped maybe she felt it too, because she licked her lips and batted her lashes as I cupped the back of her neck and drew her closer to me.
There was no resistance, no hesitation as our lips connected. A wave of tingles raced through my veins in a way only Erin could make me feel thanks to her mimic powers. She could control it, of course, but I was glad for the light rush that had me gasping as she slid her tongue over mine.
Even as we pulled apart, I
still felt my body tingle delightfully. That certainly was worth skipping class for.
“Don’t think about it,” she whispered, and her breath hit my lips from still being so close. “It will come to you.”
“Right,” I sighed blissfully. I couldn’t help but think her little line was also an allusion to what just happened between us, but it worked.
“I should make myself scarce,” she laughed as she sat up. “Can’t keep up this facade of being smart if I don’t actually learn something.”
“So, you aren’t that smart?” I teased with a chuckle.
“I guess you’ll have to wait and see.” Erin smirked.
“I suck at waiting,” I whined mockingly.
Erin stood and nudged me with her foot.
“I guess you need to get good, then,” she replied with a bit of snark.
I laughed loudly and stalled. I didn’t want to go back down, but I knew if I skipped too many of my classes I’d hear it from the girls. All of them. I’d go to Arwyn’s class at least, but I didn’t have a class with her until tomorrow.
“Are you really going to stay here all day?” Erin asked as she started toward the door we had taken to get to the roof.
I thought about it for a moment, then nodded.
“Just for today. I need more time to process things,” I admitted.
“If you say so,” she sighed as she smiled at me.
I watched her as she descended the first few steps and then disappeared into the building. I knew Erin was right, and I knew I’d be okay, but as much as I wanted the company of someone to sit with me, I also needed the space to think.
It was just for the day, I told myself.
Lunchtime came up sooner than I’d expected. I hadn’t realized I’d dozed off until the bell rang, and then the students started to fill the courtyard once more before they were forced back inside for afternoon classes. As for myself, I finally stood up and wandered back down the stairs myself and into the hall.
Walking into the dining hall was still surreal. I just stood at the end of the line of tables and stared. Everyone was going about their normal business like it was a regular school day, but to me, it was a day being wasted stuck in the education system when there were bigger things at hand.
I felt weird being this small again. It was like standing on the inside of a snowglobe and looking out into the world knowing there was more to see than what was inside the bubble of glass you were being kept in. Everything seemed to move in fast forward, and I was stuck in slow motion. I knew what Erin had said was right, but it still didn’t sit right with me.
“Gryff … ?”
Layla’s face came into my vision, and I shook my head to clear my thoughts. Then I put a smile on my face and tried to act chipper.
“Hey, how was class?” I asked, but all Layla did was frown.
“I mean, it was okay, I guess,” she said lamely. “I didn’t really pay attention.”
I laughed, but there wasn’t much mirth to it.
“Couldn’t concentrate?” I asked knowingly.
“You could say that,” she sighed.
I didn’t need to question her any further. I knew she was having as hard of a time adjusting as I was, or any of us were, and I was beginning to think we should have taken a page out of Braden’s book and just stayed in bed.
“Hey, where’s your guard?” Cyra came up on my other side with a carrot in her hand.
“I ditched him,” I replied simply. “I suspect there will be an uproar about it later, but for now I’m enjoying the peace of not having a stalker.”
Cyra snorted.
“Are you all okay?” Nia’s voice came up from the other side of Layla. She looked antsy, like she wanted to go places and do things, but wasn’t able to get away because of the responsibility of school.
I knew she wouldn’t skip a class thanks to the reputation she needed to uphold, though, so the suggestion to go back to bed would fall on deaf ears when it came to Miss Kenefick.
I considered asking Layla, though. She was always down to cuddle, and I could use a good cuddle session with her.
“Yeah,” Layla piped up with a falsely bright smile that Nia fell for, “we were just deciding where to sit.”
We were?
I looked to the table where the three of us plus Braden had always sat only to find it occupied by a group of enthusiastic first years. As they chatted away, I felt as though I had been gutted.
It wasn’t their fault, but a small, childish side of me wanted to kick them out of our table. That was our spot, and it had been through all of last year. We laughed and cried at that table, told jokes and secrets at that table, and now someone else was making memories there.
“Let’s just eat outside,” I suggested as I tried to keep a positive outlook. I walked past the newcomers who didn’t know any better, then stood in line and waited for food like everyone else.
At least there was braised beef sandwiches today.
Eating outside wasn’t the worst thing in the world. Sure, the presence of the guards was a little more prominent, but it wasn’t nearly as stifling as sitting in the dining hall and having students stare at me the whole time. At least out here there was fresh air, and there was a minimal amount of staring because the people who sat outside usually wanted to be left alone, and I was more than okay with that.
The four of us chatted about things that didn’t completely suck, like music and traveling festivals, and our desire to all go as a big group and forget that the world was falling apart for a few hours. Cyra talked about her little silver dragon, Kalon, who had been asleep in her cloak for nearly the entire day thus far and only now emerged for something to eat.
“She’s gotten big,” I commented as Kalon crawled her way over the grass to me and nestled her head on my boot. I ran a finger down her back, and she chirped happily.
“She won’t get too much bigger, though,” Cyra noted. “She’s not like a typical dragon who grows over time. Kalon can manipulate her own size. That’s the beauty of a familiar.”
“I still can’t believe you found her.” Nia smiled. “It’s like she was meant to be yours.”
“That’s what I like to think anyway,” Cyra laughed and fed the small dragon a bit of beef.
Kalon sniffed it, then nearly took Cyra’s finger off as she swallowed the meat whole.
“Still working on table manners,” Cyra joked, and the rest of us laughed as Kalon huffed and plopped back down on my boot.
Eventually, the bell to signal lunch was over rang, but Nia and Cyra were the only ones who moved to get up.
“Are you going to class at all today?” Cyra asked me with a bit of exasperation as she collected Kalon back into her cloak.
“Sorry,” I apologized with a rueful grin, “not today.”
To my surprise, Nia’s features softened a little, and she offered me an understanding smile.
“Don’t make a habit of it,” she said sweetly. “That’s all I ask.”
“I won’t,” I replied with a bit of relief. “I promise.”
“I’ll see you both later?” she asked, and Layla and I nodded in unison. Then we watched as she and Cyra walked back in to start the next half of their day before we turned to one another.
“You’re not going to class either?” I asked. Obviously, she wasn’t, but I wanted to hear it from her.
“Of course not,” she snorted. “To be honest, I want to go back to bed and just forget about the world today.”
“You’re perfect,” I blurted out, and I didn’t miss the red flush that spread on her cheeks quickly as she took the compliment.
“Don’t say that,” she whined and smacked my arm.
“Okay, okay,” I laughed, “but seriously, do you want to come back with me, and we can just sleep?”
“You’re the perfect one,” she sighed dreamily, then laughed. “Yeah, I’d love to.”
As everyone headed into the main building, we walked in the opposite direction back into
the dormitories. We wandered quietly as we snuck down through the halls and back into the room I shared with Braden.
We didn’t need to speak. There wasn’t anything to say. Layla stripped down to her underwear, and I to mine. I wandered over to Braden’s bed to make sure he was still breathing before I crawled into bed, then Layla after. She pulled the covers up over us, and I was thankful for the blanket Braden and I had hung over the window shortly after I’d gotten here so we could sleep in cool darkness during the day. Oh, we had curtains, but they did little to keep out the glaring afternoon sun.
Layla snuggled up to me, and I kissed her forehead as I put my arm around her. This had become a regular thing for us, and I didn’t mind it one bit.
“Hartmire was a mess,” she whispered. It was the first chance we’d really gotten to talk about it since we’d returned to Varle.
“I bet,” I answered as I rubbed small circles along her spine.
“We helped a lot of people, but for every person who managed to survive, there were at least ten who ended up dead.” She paused and took a deep breath. “We did everything we could while we were there. I don’t think we slept more than a small handful of hours a night. We cleaned up debris, gave medicine to those who needed it, and I spent most of my time with Nehra in the lab making medicine so our supplies wouldn’t run out.”
I listened hard to her every word as she spoke. It had been too long since she’d been able to open up about anything to me, and I wanted her to know I was here for her if she needed me to be. I always would be, too.
“What was it like working with Gawain?” I asked to try and lighten her mood.
She took a moment to think about what she was going to say.
“You know, it wasn’t all that bad,” Layla admitted with a quiet laugh. “I mean, he’s still a complete and utter ass brush, but he really cared about the work being done and was really kind to the survivors. He even went as far as to stay the night with a little boy who had lost both of his parents to the belial, and his grandparents were still MIA.”