“Indeed they are. Reminds me of Cinnamon.”
“My child reminds you of your camel?”
“Hear me out.” Adrian brought her up-to-date on how nervous the camel had been when it had first arrived at his farm and the progress they’d made since then. “I believe she was afraid of people, though I have no idea why she would be. Perhaps the man I purchased her from only interacted with her to feed her or milk her. Did I tell you about the milking?”
“Ya. I still can’t believe it sold for so much. I’ve never even heard of people drinking camel milk.”
“Anyway, at first she’d stand across the pen and stare at me suspiciously. Now, if I’m alone, she trots right over to me.”
“How does she get along with the other animals?”
“I believe she’s taken a liking to Triangle, my dog.”
“I know who Triangle is. That’s an odd-looking mutt, but I’ll admit he grows on a person.”
“She doesn’t seem to like Kendrick, though.”
“Your llama has bad manners.”
“Does not.”
“Does Kendrick spit at her?”
“Now that you mention it...”
They again shared a smile, and Grace was suddenly glad that Adrian had stopped by. It was nice to talk to someone other than her parents, and Nicole... She wasn’t able to hold up her end of a conversation yet.
Grace had never been good at talking to men. Perhaps that came from being raised with only sisters. She wasn’t sure. She did realize now that she’d been very shy as a teen, and she’d dated only in groups. Perhaps that was why she’d fallen for Nicole’s father so quickly. He’d paid attention to her in a way that she’d never experienced.
That had immediately been followed by her year in exile.
And now she was home. She was older and more confident in some ways, and she suddenly found that talking to a boy—to a man—didn’t seem nearly as intimidating as it once had.
Not that she expected anything to come of it, and maybe that was a plus. Maybe by taking the word relationship out of the equation, she was able to relax. She would like to be able to count Adrian as a friend.
Not that it would last. Adrian would eventually marry, and his fraa wouldn’t want him gallivanting next door to wash dishes with the neighbor. But she was tired of worrying about the future. Perhaps, for just a little while, she could learn to appreciate the moment for what it was.
* * *
Adrian hated to ruin the nice conversation he was having with Grace. He could practically feel her relax, and she’d actually smiled a few times. It occurred to him that her life must be lonely here with her parents.
Why didn’t she get out more?
Why didn’t she date?
He nearly groaned in frustration. He was doing it again—trying to figure out how to fix her life.
Just get to know her.
One thing he understood for certain was how much she cared about Nicole, and that was the reason he’d come to talk to her.
“Would you like to take a walk?”
She looked at him as if he’d sprouted wings. “A walk?”
“It’s a nice evening, warmer than it has been.” He peered past her, out the window. “Gut sunset. Thought we might take Nicole to see some flowers I spied near your front lane.”
She continued to look at him questioningly but stammered through a response that seemed more yes than no and ended with, “Let me fetch our sweaters.”
At first they walked slowly down the lane, Nicole toddling between them, each holding one of her hands.
“She’s not very fast yet. At this rate, we’ll reach the fence line by sunrise.” Grace attempted to pick up Nicole, who was having none of it.
She squirmed in her mother’s arms, arched her back and said repeatedly, “No, no, no, no.” Then she changed her chorus to, “Aden, Aden.”
When Adrian reached for her, Grace’s eyebrows arched in surprise, but she happily handed her over. “Fair warning—she grows heavier with each step you take.”
Adrian was once again struck by how adorable and precious Nicole was. He thought maybe she was small for her age, but what she lacked in weight and height she made up for in attitude. Though she’d plopped her two fingers into her mouth, she pulled them out to shout unintelligible words at various things.
“Any idea what she’s saying?”
“Not really.”
When they reached the wooden fence that bordered the front lane, he led them to where he’d seen wildflowers—blue violets, Virginia bluebells, and a small white flower his mother called “spring beauties.”
“Is it okay to let her down?”
“Sure, ya. Maybe she’ll wear herself out.”
Nicole glanced up at them, then toddled sideways, holding on to the bottom slat of the fence. When she squatted to pick one of the flowers, Adrian and Grace shared a smile.
“She’s a pro at that now.”
“Indeed.”
“Emerson said that ‘the earth laughs in flowers.’”
“What does that mean?”
“I don’t know, but it comes to mind when I see so many.” Adrian stuck his hands in his pockets, but his arms felt unnatural and awkward. He pulled them back out, then crossed them. Good grief. What was he so nervous about? “Say, Grace. I wanted to talk to you about Nicole.”
Which was probably the wrong way to begin the conversation, since Grace instantly froze, the expression on her face one of caution and worry.
“It’s nothing bad. It’s just that I was thinking about what you said—about not wanting Nicole around Englischers.”
Still she only looked at him, and he knew then that she was expecting him to argue with her, to tell her how silly she was, to point out the importance of the tours.
He didn’t do any of those things.
“My youngest schweschder, Lydia, she loves babies. She takes care of her nieces and nephews all the time. I was thinking that I could bring her over on tour nights, and she could stay with Nicole in the house, so she wouldn’t have to be out with all the Englischers. I’d be happy to pay her out of my portion of the profits.”
“Your schweschder?”
“Sure. You remember Lydia. Only I guess—” he glanced up at the trees, doing the math “—if she’s fourteen, which I’m sure she is, and you’re...”
“Twenty-three.”
“So you’re nine years older, which means you were out of school when she started.”
“I know Lydia, Adrian. We all attend the same church meetings.”
“Right. Of course.”
“And that’s a very kind suggestion.” She took a crushed flower that Nicole pushed into her hand. “But why...? Why would you offer to do such a thing?”
“Because you’re concerned about Nicole, and I want to ease your mind. If I can.”
Grace studied her doschder, then turned and looked at Adrian.
“It would help, probably more than you can imagine. I would definitely worry about her less if she was, you know, playing inside.”
“Exactly, and Lydia is happy to do it.”
“You’ve asked her already?”
“I suggested that I might know someone who needed her help a couple hours a week. I didn’t make any commitment on your part. I wouldn’t do that without checking with you first.”
Nicole became suddenly mesmerized by a butterfly. She reached a chubby finger out to touch it, laughed when it fluttered up and then back down again. Looking at Grace, she said, “Bird.”
“Butterfly.” Grace picked her up and kissed her neck, inhaling deeply.
Nicole stared over Grace’s shoulder at Adrian, stuck the requisite two fingers in her mouth and watched him solemnly. When Grace turned back toward him, he knew that he’d finally said and done the right thing.
“That was very thoughtful of you, Adrian. Danki.”
“Gem gschehne.”
“We accept.”
“Wunderbaar.”
“On one condition.”
“Uh-oh.”
“I will pay Lydia from my earnings.” When Adrian tried to protest, she held up a hand like a traffic cop. “It’s only fair, since she’ll be watching my doschder.”
He loved that about Grace. She treated Nicole as her own. He might never know the details of Nicole’s birth, but he did know with certainty that the little girl in front of him would never lack for love or family. Grace would see to both of those things.
“All right, but my intent wasn’t to lessen what you earn.”
“I know that. You want your tours to be a success.”
“Yup.”
“Which means no more cooking mishaps.”
“Your last meal was delicious.” For some reason, he was no longer angry when he thought of that first meal, maybe because that particular fiasco hadn’t been repeated.
“No more bees,” Grace added.
“Bees don’t really scare me.”
“And no more goats.”
“I have to admit, it was rather funny when Nelly tried to snatch the woman’s purse.”
“You’ve named your goats?”
“Well, ya. Every animal appreciates...being appreciated.” He was suddenly aware of the way the last of the day’s light played across Grace’s hair. Of course most of it was covered with her kapp, but a good bit of the part at the front had escaped.
Why was he surprised that her hair was somewhat curly?
He looked at Nicole, then back at Grace. The two looked very much alike... That must be a coincidence. Well, probably Grace’s cousin looked like Grace, so it would make sense that her cousin’s baby girl would look like Grace.
He wondered again about that situation. Why had Grace agreed to raise Nicole? Would her natural mamm want her back at some point?
“You’re too good-natured, Adrian.”
“Can a person be too good-natured?”
They were walking back toward the house, the sky afire with orange, purple and blue clouds as the sun set upon what Adrian thought had been a very good day. Which had nothing to do with the woman and child walking beside him. It was more that the conflict in his life had suddenly dissipated. Adrian wasn’t a fan of conflict. That might be why he sought the company of animals and occasionally avoided people.
Animals were predictable—except for the goats and possibly Cinnamon. Kendrick could be a challenge at times. Mostly, though, he understood why his animals did what they did. Cinnamon hadn’t been properly socialized. Kendrick was a little bored. Animals were fairly easy creatures to figure out.
People, on the other hand, were much harder to read. He often didn’t understand why they acted the way that they did. But Grace? Grace he could understand. Regardless the reason for her raising Nicole, there was no doubt that she dearly loved the child.
They’d nearly reached the porch steps when he thought to thank her for dinner.
“You don’t have to thank me, Adrian. I would have cooked anyway.”
“Still, it was nice of you to share.” He shifted a sleepy Nicole to his other arm. “I love my farm, and living in the barn isn’t a problem, but you know what I really miss?”
Grace shook her head, then ran her fingers up and down her kapp strings and waited, almost as if she were interested. He took that as a positive sign and pushed on.
“Ice cream.”
“Ice cream?”
“Ya. I have a small refrigerator but no freezer.” He rubbed a hand over his jaw. “A pint of Ben & Jerry’s would hit the spot.”
“Ben and Jerry’s? You go for the good stuff, then.”
“I do. Salted Caramel Almond is my absolute favorite.” He slipped Nicole into her arms, and for a moment, they were standing closer than they ever had, close enough that he could smell shampoo and soap and the freshness of the spring evening that seemed to have settled on Grace. She glanced up at him, a smile playing on her lips.
“That’s a real tragedy, Adrian.”
“It is.”
“Maybe you should build a house someday.”
“Or at least purchase a proper refrigerator.”
Her laughter did more to lift his spirits than a dozen pints of ice cream. As he walked back to his place, it occurred to him that caring for God’s animals was all good and fine, but people needed the companionship of other people.
The question was whether he was willing to do anything about it.
His mood sank at that thought. Every woman he’d tried to date had quickly pointed out that he spent too much time and money on animals, that he didn’t live in a proper house, that he had his priorities wrong. Women didn’t understand him. If he ever found someone who did, he would probably have to compromise, make some changes to his life.
Was he willing to do that?
Things were finally going well.
Which was why it would be ridiculous to entertain the idea of courting anyone now. Maybe in a few years. Maybe when he’d built a proper house, with a proper refrigerator, with a freezer that could hold several pints of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream.
Chapter Six
The next day’s tour went perfectly. Grace actually enjoyed cooking the meal, the tourists were pleasant, and her mamm once again sold quite a few items—including some market bags and prayer shawls she’d quickly knitted up. She also sold a couple of lap quilts that Grace’s oldest schweschder had sent over. Greta was a very talented quilter, something Grace had never mastered. Oh, she could attend a frolic and do her part, but she didn’t put fabrics together the way that Greta did. Her schweschder had a real gift.
But more than all those things, Grace was happy about having Lydia to look after Nicole. Lydia was sitting on the floor playing with her doschder when Grace left to oversee the dinner, and she was rocking her in a chair in the bedroom when she returned. The two seemed to have bonded instantly.
Lydia was thin, nearly as tall as Grace and wore glasses with blue frames. The fact that she carried a book in the pocket of her apron made Grace laugh.
“There’s always time to read when you’re waiting on someone,” Lydia explained.
Grace couldn’t have asked for the evening to have gone better. She still wasn’t convinced that Englisch tours were something they should be doing. It continued to feel odd turning their home into a commercial venture, but since her parents had already made up their minds, she might as well get on board.
Then the next morning, Nicole woke in a fussy mood.
“Maybe she’s teething again,” her mamm suggested.
But she wasn’t teething. That was always accompanied by excessive drooling. Grace had even sewn up some bibs to put on her during those times. This was different. Nicole whimpered, didn’t want any of her toys, wouldn’t even look at her daddi, who always made her smile, and insisted on Grace sitting down to hold her.
“You know what they say.” Her mamm was knitting a new baby blanket at breakneck speed. She’d just cast it on that morning, and she had already progressed a good twelve inches. The colors were a soft, variegated baby blue, yellow and pink.
“I’m afraid I don’t.”
“Cleaning, quilting, cooking... Those things will wait.”
“They will?”
“But the years when you can hold your child in your lap, those will pass in the blink of an eye.”
By midafternoon, Nicole’s cheeks were two red spots and she was tugging at her ear.
“Best take her in to the doctor,” her mamm suggested.
“Do you think it’s that serious?”
“Fevers usually rise at night, and the poor thing seems so miserable.” Her mamm stored her knitting needles,
pressed a hand to Nicole’s cheek, then kissed her softly on the top of her head. “I’ll go and ask your dat to ready the buggy.”
Her mamm drove and Grace held Nicole in her arms. The day was overcast with a slight drizzle, and the temps had turned cooler once again. Grace had rather enjoyed the week of warm, sunny days. Now the skies seemed to reflect her feelings—worry pressing down on her heart as the clouds pressed down over the fields. She knew the weather and her mood wouldn’t last, but for the moment, she was practically overwhelmed by concern and sadness and fear.
“Do you think it’s serious?”
“It could be many things, Grace. Doc Amanda will know what to do.”
Doc Amanda had been Grace’s doctor. She’d set up practice in the Goshen community before Grace was born, which meant the woman had to be getting up in age. Grace hadn’t had a need to see her since returning home, though she had called and made Nicole’s fifteen-month appointment for the following month. The pediatrician in Ohio had been a young man whose office was a bit austere. Although he seemed like a good doctor, and Grace had faithfully taken Nicole for her checkups, she’d never felt completely comfortable there.
So she walked into Doctor Amanda’s office with some hesitancy. It didn’t last long. There were low tables with toys for children, new magazines for harried parents, even a coffee center set up behind a counter with a sign that read Help Yourself.
They had been waiting only a half hour when the nurse called Nicole’s name. As Grace juggled her purse, diaper bag and child, her mamm stood and pushed a wad of bills into her hands. “From the mason jar.”
“But Mamm...”
“That’s what the emergency money is for, Grace. Now go.”
She expected to wait a long time in the small examining room. The walls were decorated with growth charts and animal pictures, which immediately reminded her of Adrian. But Nicole wasn’t interested in measuring her height or looking at animals. She sat curled up on Grace’s lap, her fingers in her mouth, an occasional whimper escaping her lips.
The nurse popped into the room with a bright smile. She wore scrubs covered with rainbows and unicorns, and her hair was pulled back into a high ponytail. She asked the standard questions, entered the information into a tablet, then took Nicole’s temperature, which was a disturbingly high 102.
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