“As in William Blake, the poet?”
“The same.” Adrian pointed to a tall maple tree, growing off by itself. “Blake said that a fool doesn’t see the same tree as a wise man.”
“Huh.”
“You asked for a quote.”
“So it all depends on the eye of the beholder?”
“Maybe. If you’re a tree.”
Laughing, they walked over to the maple tree with the old rope swing. Adrian nodded toward it and grinned. “Have a seat.”
“There?”
“Sure.”
“Why?”
“I’ll push.”
“You’ll push me and Nicole?”
“I’m strong. I can handle it.”
“Uh-huh. I guess the bigger question is whether the rope can handle it.”
The rope held, and she found herself laughing as Adrian pretended to struggle with their weight. The rope creaked and the breeze cooled Grace’s brow. Nicole laughed and clapped her hands. It was a rare moment of delight as Grace let go of her worries and stepped, for a moment, outside the endless circle of thoughts that plagued her.
As the afternoon progressed, it became obvious to Grace that Adrian was interested in courting, and she found herself warming to the idea.
True, it made her a bit nauseous to think of letting someone close. Perhaps the fluttery feeling in her stomach should make her run the opposite direction, but then she’d watch Adrian interact with Nicole and her doubts would melt away. Surely a man who could be so kind to a child wouldn’t break her heart?
Because that was one of the things that scared her. It had taken her nearly two years to recover from Kolby’s rejection. He hadn’t rejected Nicole, not really, because he didn’t know about her. He was long gone by the time Grace had realized she was pregnant.
How many months had she spent praying he’d come back?
Had she done something wrong, something to drive him away?
Or had he never really cared about her to begin with?
And which was worse?
Adrian and Nicole were pulling wildflowers from the fence line when Grace pulled her attention back to the present. Nicole looked up at Adrian and pushed the flowers toward his nose. Adrian laughed at Nicole’s insisting, “Smell, Aden. Smell.” Then he looked up at Grace, and in that moment, another part of the ice she’d carefully constructed around her heart began to melt.
Maybe it was time she took a chance.
Maybe it was time for her to trust what her heart was trying to tell her.
* * *
Adrian wanted to kiss Grace.
And yet...he didn’t.
He was still thinking about George’s advice—don’t go too slow, don’t go too fast, listen.
Her parents had gone home while Grace was playing volleyball. He’d never seen her play any game. He’d never seen her so relaxed. He was holding Nicole on the sidelines, cheering on Grace’s team, when her parents walked up, looking for their doschder.
“I’m happy to give Grace and Nicole a ride home.”
Grace’s mamm thanked him, then sent a knowing look to her dat. Perhaps Adrian wasn’t being as subtle as he thought he was. He didn’t much care. It didn’t bother him one bit if people knew that he had feelings for Grace or that he adored Nicole.
When the game was over, Grace collapsed in the grass beside him.
“I should probably get more exercise.”
Her hair was sneaking out from the sides of her kapp, her face was flushed and sweat glistened on her forehead. In other words, she looked prettier than ever.
It was later, when he was taking her home, that he started thinking about kissing her. Nicole had fallen asleep in Grace’s lap. She was curled there, in the last of the day’s light, a look of complete relaxation on her face. Why was it that only children slept with such abandon? Adrian kept glancing at them, thinking how glad he was that he’d purchased the farm next to Grace’s parents.
Thinking of how good Grace would feel in his arms.
Thinking that he’d been lonely before, maybe for years, but he hadn’t realized it.
He wanted to kiss her, but he also realized this was probably one of those moments when he shouldn’t go too fast. Grace had spent the entire afternoon with him, and she’d done so in front of all of their church members. That was a big step for her. He was learning that she was a very private person, and also very careful.
So instead of kissing her when he pulled up in front of her house, he set the brake and turned to face her.
“I had a gut time today.”
“We did, too. Danki for, well, for everything.”
“I have a question for you, if that’s okay.”
“Of course.” Her eyes widened when he reached for her hand.
He laced his fingers with hers, satisfied at the sight of their hands intertwined. Pulling in a deep breath, he gathered his courage and looked into her beautiful brown eyes. “I care for you, Grace. For you and Nicole. I was wondering... That is, I’d like to ask if—”
She waited, but she didn’t look away and she wasn’t shaking her head no. He took those as good signs.
“I’d like to court you, if that’s okay. If you’d like me to.”
She didn’t speak for a moment, and then she reached out with her other hand and touched his face. “I’d like that.”
“You would?”
“Ya.” She pulled her hand away, a look of concern shadowing her smile. “But here’s the thing, Adrian.”
She glanced down at Nicole, kissed her on the head, then looked up and met his gaze. “Nicole cares about you.”
“I care about her.”
“In my mind, she thinks of you like an onkel—a favorite onkel.”
“That’s gut, right?”
“Ya, but if this doesn’t work, if during our courting we find out that we’re not right for each other... I don’t want Nicole to lose her favorite onkel.”
“That’s not going to happen, Grace.” His voice grew husky at the thought of not being a part of Nicole’s life, of Grace’s life. He’d only recently admitted how much they brightened his day. He couldn’t begin to imagine losing them now. They would be taking a risk by pushing their relationship toward something else. But it was a risk worth taking, and he only needed to convince Grace of that in order for them to move forward. He did understand Grace’s worry. What she was saying was about herself as well as Nicole. “We’ll always be gut friends. You have my word on that.”
“Okay.” She looked as if she wanted to believe him. “I better get her inside.”
He wanted to see her to the door, but she was already struggling out of the buggy, carrying a sleeping Nicole. She hurried up the porch steps, and in the last of the day’s light, she turned and waved.
Adrian didn’t remember driving home. The next thing he knew, he was standing in the aviary, putting seed into the finch feeder. Triangle had followed him into the birdhouse, and Kendrick was camped outside the door, waiting for his evening snack.
He thought about how not so long ago, Grace had shown up in the aviary, brandishing a rolling pin. She’d been so determined to not be a part of the tours. She’d been so afraid, and he still wasn’t sure of what. But she was calmer now. She was on board with the plan to host Englischers, and they’d even discussed expanding to an extra tour day. Business-wise, things were going very well.
Who would have thought that they’d end up courting? It sounded like something from the romance novels his youngest schweschder, Lydia, occasionally read. In other words, it sounded improbable, but it also felt like Gotte’s planning.
All Adrian had to do, if you looked at it that way, was not mess things up.
He spent that night creating a list of improvements he’d like to make around his farm.
Build and instal
l a swing for Nicole. There was a perfect place under the maple tree next to the camel pen. Reinforce the fencing around the garden. Maybe even add a few more plants. Ask Mamm how to put the vegetables up for winter.
Build a house.
He tapped his pen against the pad of paper, then circled the fourth item. That was the crucial thing. If Grace did fall in love with him, if they decided to marry, he couldn’t ask her to live in a barn. The home could be small, but there needed to be space to add on to it. He knew the perfect spot. The drive into his property angled off to the right, where the barn and animal pens were located. But he could grade another drive to the left, where there was a good half acre of land surrounded by trees. It sat up on a small rise and afforded a good view of the rest of the property.
He’d once thought of turning it into a pasture for miniature horses, but horses were happy wherever you put them, as long as they had grazing, a little shade and a trough for water.
But a house needed to be somewhere special.
Because that was where he’d spend the rest of his life with his fraa and where they’d raise their children.
But how would he manage to build a house while he was just getting his business off the ground?
How could he afford it?
He didn’t bother tallying up the costs. If they decided to marry, he knew a work crew would show up to help build a home. Hopefully he could save enough to pay for the supplies.
He could do that with the tours, especially if they added another day.
Was he thinking way ahead? Ya. He was, but it was better than not thinking things through at all, which, if he was honest, had been his mode of operation the last few years. That wasn’t good enough for Grace or Nicole, though. He needed to anticipate their needs and be ready with solutions.
Because he cared about them.
He picked up his Bible and turned to where he’d been reading the night before—Proverbs. Solomon was always a gut read. “Ponder the path of thy feet, and let all thy ways be established.”
Ponder the path of thy feet.
He stared at the page, thinking about how he needed to take more time to do that. Finally his thoughts turned to the look of vulnerability on Grace’s face when she’d brought up what might happen if their courting didn’t work out. Had she courted before? Had her heart been broken? And now she had to think not just of herself but also of Nicole.
Court Grace.
Spend time with Nicole.
Begin saving for a home.
Those things were more important than his other list. They also seemed pretty simple to him. The only question was what he would do if their courting didn’t work. Because he already cared about both Grace and Nicole, more than he would have thought possible. Since he was being honest with himself, it was time to admit that he couldn’t imagine his life without them. Even considering such a thing caused sweat to bead up on his brow.
Life without seeing Grace’s smile?
Days without hearing Nicole’s laugh?
Nein.
That just wasn’t possible, so he needed to commit himself fully to winning her heart. The time had come to show Grace how much he cared.
Chapter Ten
The next week flew by for Grace.
On Monday, she took Nicole in for her vaccinations and well-baby visit. Doctor Amanda assured her that Nicole was doing fine in every category.
She was a little ahead in her speech and where she should be as far as grasping objects, walking, even feeding herself.
“Though, more lands on the floor than in her mouth,” Grace said.
Doc Amanda smiled. “Every new mother should have a dog to clean up those messes.”
Grace thought of Triangle. Nicole loved Adrian’s dog, though she’d yet to master his name. It still came out “Angle,” but the little dog never failed to make her doschder smile.
Nicole’s weight was squarely in the middle of the chart.
Her height was below average, but then Grace was only five foot three.
“And her father?” The doctor smiled as she asked, adding another notation on the computer tablet.
“A little taller. I don’t know exactly how tall.”
The doctor glanced up at her, cocked her head, then set the tablet aside. She was sitting on her little stool that rolled easily around the exam room, and now she scooted closer to the wall, rested her back against it and focused on Grace.
“You’re not the first mom to be a single parent, Grace.” When Grace only shrugged, the doctor added, “I have at least three children under my care right now—all of them are being raised by single moms.”
“Are they Amish children? Are they Amish single moms?”
“No. They’re not. Which isn’t to say that I haven’t had other single moms who were. You have to remember I’ve been in this community a long time. This isn’t a new issue.”
“It’s definitely new in my family.”
“You live with your parents?”
“Ya.”
“And how are they reacting to having you and Nicole in their home?”
“Gut. My parents are great, actually. They don’t...don’t want to talk about what happened before, but they’ve been very supportive since we moved back.” Tears pricked her eyes as she added, “They’re kind to me, and they adore Nicole.”
Nicole looked up at her name. She’d been playing with a toy the doctor had handed her to test her dexterity skills. Holding up one of the plastic animals that looked like a llama, she said, “Kendrick,” and then she plopped it into the correct hole.
Both Grace and the doctor laughed, though Doc Amanda couldn’t have known about Adrian’s llama.
“I’m happy to hear things are going well with your parents.” The doctor picked up her tablet and walked to the door, but she paused and turned back, her hand on the doorknob. “Just remember, the way life is today isn’t the way life is always going to be.”
And then she was gone, leaving Grace to wonder just what she had meant by that parting statement. But of course she knew. As she drove back to her parents’, she wondered if she believed it.
Life was a bit lonely now. Would it always be?
Certainly it was hard at times. Could she hope it would get easier?
And if she were honest with herself, occasionally the future stretched out like a road that continued forever in the distance, never deviating left or right, up or down, just an endless line of sameness—laundry and dishes, cooking and sewing, six days of work followed by a day of rest where she didn’t quite fit into any group.
Did she see her life changing for the better?
Adrian believed it was possible.
At times, he seemed naively optimistic to her, as if you could decide a thing and it would just happen. Purchase a farm and turn it into your life’s dream. Build a zoo and the animals would come. Fall in love and walk off into the sunset together.
Grace wanted to believe in those things, but it was frightening to get her hopes up. It was actually quite terrifying to allow herself to care again. What if everything went south? She probably wouldn’t be any worse off than she had been when she was alone and pregnant, but she didn’t want to once again endure that sort of pain. It had been too hard to recover the last time.
Sometimes, feeling nothing was better than making her heart vulnerable.
She just didn’t know if she was brave enough to risk that kind of disappointment and rejection again.
What she did know was that when she was with Adrian, life seemed better. The burdens she carried around on her shoulders seemed a bit lighter.
Was that love?
Monday gave way to Tuesday, and she found herself looking forward to the tour guests.
For Tuesday’s dinner, she made Swiss Mushroom Chicken and corn fritters, with a fresh salad and blackberry cobbl
er. There were no leftovers to put up. On Thursday, she cooked bacon-ranch pasta salad with grilled ham sandwiches, and peanut butter fingers for dessert. Several of the women claimed they’d love to buy a cookbook if she had one. Grace had found the recipes in the book from the library, but she’d swapped out a few ingredients and adjusted a few others.
Could she write a cookbook?
How would she even do such a thing?
She would ask Adrian’s opinion on Saturday. He would be honest with her, and he was good at weighing the pros and cons of something—though he always tilted toward the pros. He was taking her out to dinner, and her mamm had insisted on watching Nicole.
“It’s hard to court if you take your child with you.”
“But we’re a package deal—me and Nicole.”
“Of course you are, but trust me, time alone is important for every couple, whether you’ve just met, are courting or are married. Plus baby girl and I could use some girl time.”
“Hey. I’m sitting right here,” Grace’s dat chimed in.
Which caused Nicole to toddle over to her daddi, who scooped her up, then set her on his lap and proceeded to read to her from the Budget in funny voices, as if it were a children’s book.
Adrian had spoken with Grace and her parents about adding more tour dates. They agreed that it needed to be a unanimous decision, made by all involved with the tours. So they scheduled a meeting for Friday afternoon at four o’clock. Grace baked oatmeal bars, made raspberry tea and brewed a fresh pot of coffee. She had never hosted a meeting before, but she was as ready as she was going to be. Adrian’s idea to expand to Saturdays sounded good on the surface. In theory, if they went from two tours a week to three, they could increase their profits by 50 percent. But there were still only seven days in a week, and giving up another day might be hard on some of their group. It was best to address all concerns up front.
Old Saul showed up for the meeting fifteen minutes early, which wasn’t a problem because he immediately fell into a deep discussion about cows with her dat. Seth arrived next, claiming he could barely find the place without a buggy full of tourists. He joined the men out on the porch. Then George Miller arrived, representing the Goshen Plain Tourism Committee. Her mamm and dat were also sitting in on the meeting. Which left only Adrian. Where was he?
The Baby Next Door Page 11