by J E Mueller
“I think I understand what you were saying earlier. Actually understand, and not just accepting all the strange things going on here,” I said carefully. “And while I can’t change the world, I can at least show my acceptance. What do you want me to call you?”
Danny stopped, surprised. “I, um….” The words trailed off. Danny stared at me for a moment before shrugging. “I’ll get back to you on that,” And with that, led the way inside.
We took a step into the dimly lit room. The smell of sage and incense instantly consumed my senses. Thin curtains blocked most of the sun and shelves lined most of the room from floor to ceiling. Several small tables were scrunched up together in the middle and at the far end of the room sat a desk. Behind it was a tired looking woman, maybe in her mid-forties. Her hair was tossed up in some form of messy knot that looked like it hadn’t been touched in days. Her clothes were just as rumpled and disheveled.
“Allium.” Danny called, entering the room, “How are you this fine afternoon?”
She squinted as we approached. “Danial? No, no, Dannielle? What day is it anyway?”
Danny laughed, stopping in front of the desk. “It’s the Wednesday after the full moon.”
Allium nodded, glanced my way, and then looked back toward Danny. “The west winds have been restless lately. The anger of the spirits is on the rise.”
“We’re working on that. My friend here.” He motioned toward me. “Tella, she’s learning. I think she’ll be able to help Mist a lot.”
“Oh, that would be nice.” Allium nodded vigorously. “She’s certainly seen death, but what can she do to help a soul?”
Her words surprised me but Danny continued on unphased. “As soon as she’s ready, I’ll take her to Mist myself and we’ll find out.”
“Oh, good. We need to get this fixed. I love the wind, but it’s never carried this many voices.” Allium sighed before waving us off to the adjacent room. “Best get to it, then.”
“You’re the best!” Danny smiled and motioned for me to follow.
I nodded my thanks, not sure what else to say to the strange woman.
Opening the door to the next room revealed a small space. Shelves lined the walls, though most weren’t even close to full. Books, knicknacks, and strange looking pictures were spread out.
On a shelf close to me I picked up an old dagger. Traces of magic lingered on it, but it had no real power left. Putting it back I noticed a symbol engraved into the wood of the shelf. It looked like two fists coming together.
“What’s this symbol?” I asked curiously.
Danny closed the door and came over to look at it. “That was the symbol for those who regularly fought spirits. Certain spots seemed to attract such spirits regularly so they’d mark it with that symbol. Most of their weapons were placed on that shelf to be fixed or scrapped and reforged.”
I looked at the blade with dying magic again, wondering if it could still be fixed. “Are there many of these old weapons left?”
Danny nodded and went across the room. Several boxes lay under the bottom shelf and he gave them a light kick. “Whatever is left here. It looks like they were getting ready to move them, probably to be fixed, when something happened.” He stared at them for a moment. “I guess I missed a lot.” His eyes lingered on the boxes. “But I was needed at home.”
“You’re back now, so don’t worry about it. Maybe we can fix them.” I shrugged. “But that’s an idea for another time. What’s next to reach the spirit realm?”
Danny didn’t bite on the subject and instead went back a step. “We can’t fix them, even if you have the ability. The rituals are missing along with the spells. It’s silly to think it’s possible.”
“Maybe, maybe not.” I grabbed the chest out of my pocket. “I still have this and haven’t even looked through all the books yet.”
For a moment Danny’s eyes lit up, but then he shook his head. “I guess we’ll see. I won’t lay my hopes on that.”
“Understood,” I replied, hoping to prove him wrong later.
Danny sat in the center of the room. “First let’s see how you do, getting back into spirit form.”
Muttering to myself, I sat down across from him. I could do this. I had to. So, I closed my eyes and thought about the disc. It was easy to remember the cold and the sharpness of the magic. While it wasn’t a horrible feeling, it was very unpleasant. The sudden ice bath before feeling nothing…
For a moment all I could feel was my normal magic. The steady, happy hum of it buzzed through me. It was always a part of who I was. Again, I thought about the disc and tried to find a similar feeling. I couldn’t find anything similar.
Of course I couldn't, it was my soul I needed to try and find, not something with the magic within my body.
Everything about the realization felt absurd. I could feel my cheeks flush with annoyance but didn’t bother opening my eyes. Learning could be irritating, but I could do this.
Ignoring my normal magic, I quickly found the cold bit of magic I was looking for. The tingling familiarity of it was exciting, but I hesitated for a moment before plunging myself into the cold and then the nothingness.
“Why is it so cold as a spirit?” I complained, ignoring my body. At least it wasn’t a crumpled heap for once. Instead, I looked like I was lying down comfortably.
Danny laughed for a moment, laid down, and joined me. “It’s only half a second of unpleasant cold. No big deal.”
“Uh-huh.” I rolled my eyes. “Okay, I did it. Now what?”
“Back to what we discussed earlier.” Danny smiled happily. “You need to create a portal.”
“Okay then…” I got up to pace.
Floating around was much easier this time. The room was filled with odd magics. The blades that felt nearly lifeless earlier had much more magic to them now. Still likely useless, but it was much easier to see how much life was in them. The boxes Danny had kicked glowed softly, more gray than blue. The symbols on the shelves seemed to have bits of magic in them as well. Instead of attempting to complete my task, I found I was caught up in the wonder of this strange magic.
“How is any of this magic even done?” I whispered, taking in all the varying shades of blues and grays.
Danny walked over to a shelf that had next to nothing on it. Without explaining I could see magic go to his pointer finger as he slowly engraved a symbol. A tree without leaves was the final product. “Basically, it’s inputting your own life force into an object. Too much will wear you down and you’ll need to rest.”
“What’s that symbol for?” I asked as I looked it over. A surprising amount of detail went into it.
“It’s a dual symbol. It can mean the end or the beginning,” he replied softly. “That’s exactly where we are at. If we can’t solve this, it’s the end. If we can, it’ll be a new beginning for those with our magic.”
We stood in silence for a moment.
“Why did you go home?” I don't know why I asked it. It didn't seem important. Likely Danny was only here still because he left the others for a time.
“My cousin died,” Danny said softly. He was at a loss for words for a moment. “I needed to make sure his murder didn’t go unavenged.”
That wasn’t the turn I had been expecting. “What did you do?” I asked. I had no idea where this conversation would lead, and wondered if I had done the right thing by asking.
“He was poisoned for sticking up for me.” Danny looked at his carving for a moment before moving to pace the room. “While I don’t flaunt that I’m trapped in the wrong body, many back where I grew up know who I am. Daniella is a much better name for me, but I’ve no idea how to adjust and transition. Adding in my strange magic makes many uneasy about me. I left home for what I thought would be the last time to get away from the negativity that latched onto that village. For the most part, many were understanding and kind, but those who could not accept it…”
He trailed off for a moment, looking at another carving acro
ss the room. “With the help of other spirits I found all the information needed to jail my cousin's killer.” He laughed, but no humor was in his tone. “The village actually wanted him hung, but I fought for his life. I don’t even know why, but I know it’s what my cousin would have wanted.” He shrugged and walked back over to me. “The whole thing took about eight months, and then I got caught up with the spirits in the neighboring areas. When I got the message to hide my gifts, I laughed. When I really learned why, it was nearly too late. I barely made it here. Spirits are one thing, but I cannot fight demons.”
“Demons are a different nightmare altogether,” I agreed.
“I never did thank you for being a distraction. I got here in one piece. It wasn’t until a day later word finally got to me about what you did.” Danny shrugged. “I’ve got no way to repay you for using such a risky plan.”
“Would have gone just fine if I hadn’t hit that wall shield.” I cringed thinking about it.
“I can actually show you how to get around that.” Danny smiled. “But I suppose we should get back to this first lesson.”
“Right…. That portal,” I grumbled.
“Yep, that annoying portal.” Danny chuckled, walking back over to me. “That portal that will whisk you away to the spirit realm.”
“Yeah, that portal.” I rolled my eyes. “Any helpful hints?”
“Stop overthinking it and just do it.” Danny laughed.
“That is not helpful,” I grumbled at him.
I tried calling this spirit magic to my fingertips and used it to slice through the air. For a moment it seemed to do something, but then it was gone.
“Wait, what just happened?” I looked at my hands in surprise.
“You did exactly what I told you.” Danny shrugged, continuing to be unhelpful.
“Okay how do I make it bigger and stay longer?” I asked, not giving up.
“Use more magic,” Danny mused.
I glared at him. “I see why teaching wasn’t your thing.”
“We really don't have time to go through months of training, so think of it as a blunt crash course.” Danny smiled sweetly.
I continued to glare but called forward more magic and closed my eyes. In my mind, I pictured the portal Danny had shown me earlier, but this time it was bigger. With a deep breath I opened my eyes and sliced my magic into the air, and for once I felt it actually cutting into the magic of the world around it. The cut grew and I was able to create a hole. Without commenting, Danny grabbed my hand and thrust it into the hole and I was suddenly whisked through it.
On the other side, Danny joined me and I finally saw her for who she actually was. There was no lying that the spirit realm showed one's true self. Her hair was long and braided. Her features were slightly softer and just a bit more feminine.
“Daniella.” I nodded before glancing down at myself. I couldn’t tell how much I had changed, if at all.
Daniella smirked, seeing my reaction, and conjured up a mirror. While I wanted to ask how, instead I was caught up by the sight of my own reflection. I looked older. My hair seemed darker and had more waves. It looked wonderful framing my face, but my eyes screamed of pain and sadness. It reminded me of all the spirits I had already seen and hadn’t been able to help.
“This is so… weird,” I finished lamely.
“It is,” Daniella agreed without hesitating.
“I don’t understand why I look so much older…” I looked back at my reflection once more.
“You’ve seen much, not just with spirits but also in your dealings with demons. Your worldview is shaped from a broad base of experiences and knowledge. Your soul is more refined than many your age, and there is nothing wrong with that,” Daniella offered an explanation.
I nodded, letting the words sink in. “What should I call you?”
“Danni works.” She smiled. “It is the shortened version of my name either way.”
I nodded again, turning away from my reflection to take in this new realm around me. It was empty and vast. Silver-blue nothingness stretched as far as I could see. There was no ground, or sky, or anything at all to mark where we could be.
“What now?” I asked softly.
Danni smiled. “We get to play a little game called make the newbie hate us.”
“What?” I turned toward her, confused.
“You can’t see anything, correct,” she stated rather than asked.
Still, I answered, “Correct. There’s nothing here.” I motioned toward the empty around me.
“You see, the spirit realm is smart. It knows we’re not dead even though we’ve made it here. So it allows you to view it in a dreamlike state. Dreamers have sometimes happened upon this place, because magic is weird, but they see the nothingness you see before you,” Danni explained.
“So what do we have to do to change that?” I asked curiously. I didn’t like the idea of having to trick a whole realm into being visible, but she seemed to know what she was doing.
“Turn back toward the vastness,” Danni instructed.
I really hated the sound of this. “What are you going to do?”
“Kill you.” Danny laughed.
It sounded so absurd. “You can’t kill a spirit.”
“Correct.” She smiled pleasantly.
With a sigh, I turned away from her. I guessed the worst she could do was kill me, but since that was impossible, I had little to worry about. It struck me that spirits that were ‘killed’ were actually sent straight here… It was too late for me to react when the thoughts caught up to me. A blade was plunged deep into my back, and for a moment I felt intense pain, and then again nothing.
I turned to scream at her. “What was that for?”
Laughing, she moved to retrieve the blade. “So you could see.”
“Wha-” I turned to see Danni was right. There were many spirits watching us with amusement. The empty room was no more - they were now everywhere. Some spirits floated nearby and many more were aimlessly milling about further away. In the distance I could see structures. Rooms and buildings were floating in what appeared to be random spots giving the place a really otherworldly and creepy vibe. What had I gotten myself into now?
“I suppose that is an acceptable reason to be stabbed,” I muttered, not sure how else to respond to everything.
“Good. Less anger now means we can continue on much more easily.” Danni smiled and started to head forward. “This way.”
I followed behind. “How do you even know where you are going?” I took note of how things were literally floating by just the same as we were.
“Training. We know how to find each other,” Danni replied honestly. “I’m really not sure how to explain it. We give off a different vibe, so it’s just a matter of seeking that odd vibe out. Like normal magic, everyone has their own signature. It’s a combination of that off-ness and the signature you’re looking for.”
“What if they weren’t here?” I asked curiously, happy that Danni didn’t seem bothered by my questions while she searched.
“That’s the beauty of this place, you’d actually know where they are.” Danni smiled. “Usually we can set up an example, but until you’re used to this place I wouldn’t advise traveling here alone.”
“So, say I do end up here alone sooner rather than later…” I saw the look Danni gave me. “What? We’ve had a lot of bad things happen lately. Let’s just be prepared for a change!”
Danni sighed deeply but gave in. “Okay, what’s the question now?” She stopped and waited for me to ask.
“How would I go about finding someone, finding a particular spirit, and getting out?” I asked all at once.
“I guess we can use Lliam as an example here,” Danni replied, thinking out loud.
“Where did he wander off to anyway?” I hadn’t seen him since we went to lunch.
“Well, try and seek him out with your magic. You should know exactly where he is.” Danni smiled. “And when you do find him, give his mag
ic a tug and he’ll come this way.”
I knew how to do that part well. Growing up, I used to do that with Marc and Lee all the time, and with Lydia when she was home. I couldn’t remember who learned it first, likely Lee since he was the oldest, but I always remembered knowing how to use my magic that way.
Finding Lliam was a bit more difficult. I hadn’t really interacted with him on any magical level. We had only spoken, which I supposed was true about all my magic interaction with the spirits. What would his signature feel like? I tried to recall him always popping in at random, and sometimes at really useful times. Lliam always seemed tired, if I was being honest, but he also had a sense of righteousness, pride, and honor about him.
Using this group of thoughts and feelings, I tried to hone in on where he was. To my surprise, a very specific thought came to mind. He was back at Reawakening, watching Lydia do her training with another in a field. Not sure exactly how to get his attention, I tried tugging at the momentary connection between us. It felt like he tugged back, so I let go and looked at Danni.
“I think I did it,” I said, still unsure, but what else could it mean?
“Should only be a moment then.” Danni shrugged and continued on. I followed closely behind.
“Where exactly are we going?” I asked.
In that moment Lliam joined us. “So, you actually made it, huh?”
“Only took half a day of practicing.” I smirked. “What were you doing watching Lydia?”
“Would it make sense that I miss my mission, doing normal Blessed things, and hate being stuck mostly dead with little to do to aid the cause?” Lliam replied honestly.
He had a point, so I nodded.
“We’re heading to Mist. Would you like to tag along? I had Tella call you here to teach her how it can be done,” Danni explained.
Lliam nodded. “Sure, I’ll come with you. Maybe there will be some real answers there.”