by Meghan Sloan
He rubbed his hands over his face.
“She’s infuriating. Beautiful, fiery, kind and compassionate, doesn’t suffer fools gladly. But infuriating. Suspicious. Single-minded.”
“Flaws are often outweighed by the good things, depending on the person,” Norman pointed out.
“She’s not the type of woman I would pay attention to in normal circumstances.”
“You wouldn’t have met her under normal circumstances.” Norman paused, tilting his head. “Is it because you can’t have her that you find her attractive?”
“I thought about that, and I don’t think that’s the case. I felt it here,” Gabriel rubbed his chest, which was still feeling tight, “when I first saw her. When she literally bumped into me. She’s...she’s something else.”
He did have it bad. And Gabriel hated it. His father had said while they were arguing and Gabriel was being thrown out of the house that when he finally found someone he could fall in love with, he would experience that it wasn’t as simple or as foolish as Gabriel had once declared. He was beginning to find that out now, in harsh reality.
“What am I going to do?”
“You’re going to have to step back and leave her be,” Norman said solemnly. “Your brother wants to court her, and you were the one who put them together in the first place. You need to step away.”
“I know, but…” Gabriel closed his eyes, “I’m not sure if I can.”
“You’re going to have to. What are you going to do? Marry her yourself?” Norman grunted. “That’s going to be interesting with you in charge here and her father in charge of the other.”
“Who said anything about marrying her?”
But the thought of marriage didn’t scare Gabriel as much as he thought it would. If it had been anyone else - that woman Jessica Gibson, for instance - Gabriel would have balked. The idea of marriage with his old self didn’t sit well. His parents had been pestering him to find a good, respectable girl and settle down. If he didn’t, they would have found her themselves.
However, marriage to Cassandra...that wasn’t as frightening as Gabriel thought it would be. And that was very sobering, because he knew that he could never really have her.
“I’ll instruct my carriage to take you home.” Norman shot to his feet and threw Gabriel a glare. “You do that again, and you can forget about the agreement to buy this place. Like I said, I don’t deal with drunks.”
#
“Miss Seton.”
Cassandra turned, and her heart sank. Percy was approaching her across the terrace, looking at her in concern. She had hoped she could have a moment outside, away from everyone. It had felt like everything was pressing in on her, and Cassandra hadn’t been able to concentrate.
She didn’t want to ruin the Duke and Duchess’ ball because she wasn’t feeling up for socialising. Percy had invited her along as his guest, and she hadn’t wanted to disappoint him. This was meant to be a chance to get to know him more.
But all Cassandra could think about was the kiss with his older brother. And it was consuming her to the point where she couldn’t enjoy a social gathering with the man she was supposed to be seeing romantically.
She swallowed back a hard lump in her throat and managed a smile.
“Mr. Tattershall. You seem to be in the habit of coming to find me when I wander off on my own.”
“I noticed.” Percy stopped before her, his eyes drifting over her face. “You seemed very distracted while we were dancing.”
“It’s…” Cassandra bit her lip. “It’s been a difficult time so far.”
That was an understatement. It was all Cassandra could do not to blurt out to Percy that she had been having thoughts about his brother. He would be upset, and angry, and Cassandra knew it was her fault.
She shouldn’t have returned the kiss. She should have been pushing him away, slapping him and telling the man not to bother her again. But that hadn’t happened. Instead, Cassandra had kissed him like she was starving.
She had never been a wanton woman before. It was just whenever she was around Gabriel, Cassandra was very aware of herself as a woman. One who wanted a man she should have no business wanting. Gabriel was the last person her father would approve of as a match, due to his past and family history. That should have been the end of it for Cassandra. They couldn’t be together. Both of them knew it.
So why was it so difficult to put it aside and chalk it up to a mistake?
“Difficult?” Percy frowned. “Your father’s not unwell, is he?”
“What? Oh, no, he’s perfectly well, all things considered.” As well as anyone could be preparing for a funeral. “I...I’ve just got a lot of things on my mind.”
“I understand.” Percy touched her shoulder, his hand warm through his glove. “I know you love Seton’s, but you need to remember that you’re not in charge. You don’t need to worry so much.”
“I suppose…” Cassandra stopped. What did he just say? She stared at him. “You knew? How did…?”
“Father knew. He has a few friends who frequent Seton’s.”
“And the fact my father is in charge of a gambling hall doesn’t bother you?”
“Not really,” Percy shrugged. “Father was dubious, but you impressed him. And you certainly impressed me.”
That was something. Cassandra felt some relief lift off her shoulders. If only that could make her feel any better. She swallowed and tried a sly smile, but it fell short of what she wanted.
“Did you think I was going to be uncouth and unladylike?”
“We weren’t sure what we were going to get, if I’m honest,” Percy’s expression warmed. “But we’re pleased with how you presented yourself.”
“I can be ladylike when I need to be.” Cassandra lifted her chin. “But just be aware that the other side of me will come out and I’m not one to hold back.”
Percy chuckled.
“I’ll remember that. Although I think I like the sweeter side of you.”
He would. Percy was just sweet all over. He was still a little awkward socially, and Cassandra had witnessed it throughout the evening, but it was endearing. Percy was just a sweetheart, and it was a wonder no woman had seen that.
They just saw the awkwardness and the lack of charm Percy seemed to have when he initially attempted to start a conversation. Once that stumbling block was gone, he relaxed and he was just a completely soft-hearted man with good intentions, and a kind smile and a gentleness that would make any man pale in comparison. Any woman who saw that could fall for him.
But he wasn’t Gabriel. Gabriel wasn’t soft, or gentle. He was anything but, and yet he was the one who made Cassandra’s pulse race and those smiles of his were enough to make Cassandra feel lightheaded.
Why couldn’t she have this attraction for Percy? It would make things so much simpler. He was just the perfect man for her, in her father’s eyes. Ernest would certainly approve. He wouldn’t approve of Gabriel.
And yet…
You should be focusing on Percy, the man before you. Not the man who knows how to kiss a woman and leave her wanting more.
“What’s on your mind, then?” Percy’s hand lowered from her shoulder. He was still watching her closely. “You’ve been very distant tonight. I was getting worried about you.”
“Oh. It’s nothing, really. Just...female troubles.” Cassandra saw Percy arch an eyebrow. He was skeptical already. “Nothing to concern yourself about, Mr. Tattershall.”
“Are you sure about that? I can be a very good listener if you need to talk.”
“I’m sure. But there are some things that women should not share with men.” Like the fact I kissed your brother and I want to do it again. “Men have blanched over the very simple things, or they get incredibly bored. I don’t want to do either with you.”
If it had been anyone else, they would have accepted this and walked away long before. But Percy was still there. He was like his brother in that aspect; stubborn. Cassandra didn’
t want to be harsh to him, but she wanted to get away from him. She wanted to be left alone until it was time to head home. Maybe she could feign being unwell and would have to go home. But Cassandra didn’t want to ruin Percy’s evening, and he seemed to be having a good time now he had his nerves out of the way.
She was stuck, and Cassandra had no idea what to do without upsetting someone. She certainly didn’t want to upset the man before her.
“You’re normally a rather secretive person, aren’t you?” Percy said.
Cassandra shrugged.
“I would say that yes, there are times when I am. It’s not often that we can keep secrets because people like to share a little too much nowadays. When we can, those secrets are treasured.”
“I will not argue with that. It is difficult to keep things quiet from anyone nowadays,” Percy sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, I hope you let me in on those secrets one day, Miss Seton. If we’re going to be...well, I’d like to think you can come to me.”
Cassandra touched his arm and gave him a smile.
“Thank you, Mr. Tattershall. You’re very kind.”
“I like to think so.” Percy gestured over his shoulder towards the open terrace doors, the sound of orchestral music floating through the air. “Are you coming back in? I don’t think we should stay out here alone for too much longer. People are going to talk.”
Talk. If they knew what Cassandra had done, there would certainly be a lot of talk. Cassandra shook her head and straightened up.
“I’ll stay out here a moment more. I’m still feeling a little faint.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure. It’s a little too warm in there,” Cassandra managed another smile. “Besides, people really would talk if you and I went in at the same time. Even if it’s innocent, you know how people react.”
“I know. It’s like they have nothing better to do,” Percy sighed. “Very well, I’ll take my leave for now. When you’re ready inside, you’ll find me in the dining hall.”
“All right. And thank you, Mr. Tattershall.”
Percy’s eyes twinkled as he reached for Cassandra’s hand, raising to his mouth for a kiss. His lips were soft and warm, Cassandra feeling the heat through her gloves. But that was it. She felt the warmth, but it didn’t do anything. No shot of attraction through her body, no shiver of anticipation. Cassandra felt nothing.
She managed to keep the smile on her face as Percy went inside, and then she slumped down and buried her face in her hands. This would be so much easier if she was attracted to him. Percy was such a dear man. For all of his awkward faults, he was the sort of man any woman would want to be married to. The awkwardness could make it hard, and Percy withdrew as a result, but there was no reason why he couldn’t have a wife who could love him for him.
It just wasn’t going to be her. And Cassandra was really trying. She wanted to love Percy, and she did. Just a few meetings with Percy Tattershall, and she liked him. But she couldn’t love him as he deserved. That love couldn’t turn into something deeper. Cassandra so wanted it to, but it was like her heart wasn’t in it.
Because you’ve already given it to someone else.
“That was such a sweet sight.”
Cassandra jumped and spun around. She hadn’t realised that someone had joined her. But there was no one there. Cassandra peered into the darkness.
“Is someone there?”
There was a rustling of clothes and then a dark-haired woman stepped onto the terrace. She was dressed in a gorgeous dark red dress that fitted to her body, and her hair was gathered up on her head, revealing her long, swan-like neck. There was a glass of something in her hand.
Cassandra hadn’t realised that she was around. She frowned.
“Miss Gibson?”
“Who else?” Jessica took a sip of her drink, fixing Cassandra with a sneer. “You don’t think one Tattershall son is enough? You have to seduce the other one?”
From the way she was holding herself and the slightly slurred words, this drink wasn’t her first one. It was very bad form and embarrassing for a woman to get drunk at these engagements, and Cassandra knew that the Duke and Duchess of Suffolk kept a close eye on the alcohol.
They weren’t keen on it themselves, but always put a small amount out when hosting. It was odd, but nobody seemed to mind. Each to their own. If they knew one of their guests had somehow swiped more alcohol than she was supposed to, then the Duke and Duchess weren’t going to be too impressed.
“I thought you were going to live on the south coast.”
“I asked to attend this ball before I left,” Jessica gestured towards the ballroom with her glass. “I’m a friend of the duchess.”
Cassandra doubted that. But this was Jessica Gibson. She seemed to be stuck in a world where she thought everyone owed her a favour and that she was the one with all the connections. Cassandra wondered if the Duchess of Suffolk even knew what Jessica looked like.
“You were supposed to have left a while ago. You’re just delaying the inevitable.”
Jessica’s lip curled.
“That’s none of your business.”
“Just like the Tattershall family is none of your business. I’m not cavorting around with Gabriel, so you can stop with that.” Cassandra hoped that it was dark enough that Jessica couldn’t see how flushed she was. “Percy Tattershall and I are in the process of courting.”
Even that sounded hollow to her ears. Jessica looked disbelieving.
“I see. Does he know that you’re involved with his brother as well? With my man?”
If it had been anyone else, Cassandra would have simply walked away. But with her mood, and the fact this woman had already embarrassed her in public once before, she was not interested in having a civil conversation. She stepped towards Jessica, feeling a flush of pleasure when the other woman stepped back with a flicker of worry passing across her face. She was a woman of sharp, cruel words, but she couldn’t deal with the backlash.
And there would be a lot of backlash from Cassandra. She wasn’t in the mood for this.
“Your man? Did you just describe your former lover as your man?” Cassandra snorted. “Don’t be pathetic. Everyone knows that Gabriel Tattershall doesn’t want anything to do with you. That you were just a passing token of affection. And there is no ‘involvement’ with him, either.” She was too annoyed to be embarrassed at the images flying around in her head. “He and I are acquainted, and that’s it. I don’t socialise with men like Gabriel Tattershall.”
No, you just kiss them until you can’t think straight anymore.
Not now. Stop.
Jessica’s eyes narrowed. She was starting to get some of her bravado back.
“Keep it that way. My move to the south coast is merely a temporary thing. When I come back to Ipswich, Gabriel and I will be together. We both know it.” She patted her hair, preening herself. “We’ll be married, and then I’ll make sure you keep away from him.”
Cassandra wanted to throttle her. There were people who needed their heads knocked against something hard in the hope common sense would return, and then there were people who were simply delusional. Jessica Gibson fit firmly in the second category.
Cassandra growled, which had Jessica jumping and almost spilling her drink. Cassandra folded her arms and watched her with a glare.