by Lisa Oliver
Cam rested his elbows on the desk, his fists evident between them. “I do know how things work. You’ve got nothing on Fergus, otherwise he’d be tucked up in a cell somewhere with no chance to call a lawyer. You came to me, claiming some sort of connection because I’d been in the military, hoping I’d spill secrets Fergus might have shared when we’re in bed together. You’re missing one big point. Fergus is exactly who he says he is.”
“What I can tell you,” Cam continued, “seeing as you’re so damn nosy about him, is he makes the best eclairs in the country – you can ask Rocky the town sheriff about them. His honey muffins will give you a mouth orgasm. He has pet names for people like Sensational Sarah who considers him the best boss in the whole wide world. He has never said a cross word, claimed a hatred of anybody, or never failed to stop and give people the time of day since he arrived here.”
The way Brown and Cannel leaned back in their chairs let Cam know they’d heard the same things. “If you’re investigating his family, then investigate them. Fergus hasn’t had anything to do with them since he was eighteen years old.”
“So, he has talked about his family, then?” Cannel perked up about that.
Nothing except that one comment about his mother. “Nope. I checked his social media pages which you should have done. There are no photos of him with any family member after he turned eighteen, the legal age for a shifter to be considered an adult. He’s gay. It happens. I’m sure you’ve come across hundreds of shifters who are kicked out from their group because of their sexual orientation.”
“Look,” Brown tried again. “We don’t want Fergus. We’re not out to cause any trouble for him. But there’re things going on with his herd…”
“Fold,” Cam snapped. “A Scottish Highland bull’s herd is known as a fold.”
Brown let out a long breath. “His fold then. They’re on our radar, we’re talking national security concerns, but no one from there will talk to us. From what we can work out, the only reason Fergus got away, or left, or whatever you want to call it, is because he’s not a full shifter.”
That was something Cam didn’t know, and he had to wonder where the council got their information from. But he didn’t let anything show on his face. “I’ve seen Fergus in his shifted form. He’s a big bull.”
“Some half-breeds can shift.” Cannel stood up, and after a moment, Brown did too.
Cannel dropped a card on Cam’s desk. “Talk to your mate. Encourage him to share more about his family and his life growing up in the fold, and when you learn something, get in touch.”
Cam’s expression was clearly saying “not on your fucking life.” Brown tapped the desk. “National security, buddy. You’ve been on the front lines and have shown your loyalty to this country for decades. Don’t let us down now. The fate of shifters everywhere could depend on it.”
Yeah, yeah and yet you still aren’t letting me know what Fergus’s damn fold are apparently doing. Cam followed the men out of the office, through the busy bar and watched as they went around the building to where their vehicle was parked. Moments later a large black town car sped out, spraying up gravel as it headed out of town. Fucking show offs. The day Cam was impressed by lousy driving techniques was the day he booked himself into a home for shifters with Alzheimer’s.
“Fergus was here,” Darwin said, coming up beside him. “He looked like shit, and frankly boss, so do you.
“We’ve only had one full day together since we’ve mated, and that was just after Fergus broke his back after being pushed out of a second story window,” Cam said, his jaw tight. “Now there’s more shit and council guards sniffing around although they are quick to admit my mate has done nothing wrong.”
“You need a break boss. You both do.”
“Yeah, well, while I can get people to cover me at the bar, there is no one Fergus can get to cover his baking even a couple of days a week.” Cam sighed heavily. He knew he needed to get to Fergus, but he was dreading the conversation he knew they had to have.
“What about Brutus?”
“Who?” Then Cam’s brain came back online. “Brutus the bear shifter, living with you guys? I thought he was famous for his chicken wings.”
“You’ve been listening to Rocky,” Darwin scoffed. “I swear that wolf has all people categorized by his favorite food types. Brutus is a damn good cook; makes his own breads and sweet stuff too. Rocky’s probably forgotten, because I swear his brain is always on his next meal, but before all the kids came along, Brutus used to have baked shit around all the time. It might not be as amazing as Fergus’s, but it would be damn close, and that young mate of yours needs a break, before he shatters.”
Before our mating shatters, you mean. But Cam didn’t voice his biggest fear, even though he considered Darwin a friend. “I’ll talk to him. We’d best get back inside.”
“I’d better get back inside, boss.” Darwin pushed on Cam’s back. “You need to get to Fergus. We’ll lock up here; just go be with him. I have a strong feeling he needs you right now.”
We need each other. Fuck. I hate putting more hours on Darwin. But Cam knew Darwin understood. The mouse shifter had resisted the need to be with his mate initially when he and Simon first claimed each other, because Darwin had this urge to prove he could be independent. But it wasn’t long before he’d come to Cam asking for less hours, which Cam was happy to organize.
Another push from Darwin, which really didn’t do anything at all given their differences in bulk, and Cam started down the street towards Fergus’s house. Our house, if I have anything to do about it.
Cam knew Darwin had been right the moment he stepped into the kitchen. Fergus was sitting at the small table, his eyes rimmed with tears, a pile of tissues sitting at his side. His small smile was watery at best and Fergus’s bottom lip held a hint of blood where he’d been bothering it with his teeth. But it was Fergus’s words on seeing him that broke Cam’s heart. “Do you hate me now?”
Moving faster than he thought possible, Cam had Fergus out of his chair and into his arms in the time it took to blink. Cradling his weeping mate softly, he strode into the living room, settling himself on the couch, and Fergus on his lap. “There is nothing on this earth that could make me hate you,” he growled. “Absolutely nothing.”
Chapter Fourteen
Fergus imagined a lot of things when Cam came home, and yes, he’d guessed his mate would leave the bar as soon as he was free from the officials. Hatred. Anger. Disgust. A demand for explanations. But there was none of that. The only thing Fergus saw in Cam’s gaze as he walked into the kitchen was relief and concern. A concern that was matched by his actions as Fergus was swept into his mate’s arms.
Much later Fergus would blame his fresh bout of tears on being so very tired. He hadn’t had more than three hours solid sleep since he’d met Cam and the stress of spending such long hours away from his new mate had taken a huge toll on his gentle bull who was still a herd animal at heart. Being in Cam’s arms was a heavenly feeling, and Fergus longed for nothing more than to curl up and never face the world again. But he’d known, deep in his gut, as soon as Darwin told him about the “official” men visiting Cam that the time for sharing his deepest secrets was long past.
“I would have told you.” Fergus sniffed and wiped at his eyes although he didn’t look up. Just having the steady thump of Cam’s heartbeat under his ear was comforting. “I promise I’ve never done anything criminal in my life. I can’t help the circumstances around my birth. I didn’t ask to be like this.”
Cam’s thick fingers, that had given his body so much pleasure even when he was too tired to think straight, were a soothing massaging presence in his hair. “Why don’t you start at the beginning, and tell me what this horrible thing is, that had you thinking I’d leave you because of it,” Cam prompted.
“I’m not a pure shifter.” Fergus squeezed his eyes shut, wanting to block out the slightest trace of negativity. “I shouldn’t even be in this town. No one w
ould want me if they knew. I’m a fraud. All my friends will turn me out when they know. Deputy Joe or Sheriff Rocky will arrest me, or maybe both of them together. I’ll be frog-marched out of town like a common criminal. Mayor Ra will post a huge notice up at the town hall telling people to shoot me on sight.”
“Ra’s mate Seth is a hybrid. He’s half fae half rabbit.”
Fergus stilled on Cam’s chest, although he didn’t look up. “Seth is mated to the mayor? Didn’t the townspeople know about his half breed status before they voted for Ra?”
“Everyone knew and didn’t care.” Cam’s chuckles shook Fergus’s whole body. “Ra met Seth when Seth was being hunted by his colony. Let’s just say Ra’s no slouch when it came to tracking his mate down, although Seth wouldn’t let the tiger claim him before the whole sordid business came out in the town square. Alpha Simpson, the rabbit leader claimed Seth was unnatural because he’s a half-breed lop-eared rabbit, told everyone he was adopted, which poor Seth didn’t know at the time, and basically washed his hands of him.”
“Oh no.” Fergus’s heart hurt thinking about a poor rabbit in that sort of position. Especially a lop-eared one that was so small and cute. “Did the townspeople run Seth out of town? How did Ra get him back?”
“The townspeople voted to banish Alpha Simpson out of town, especially after he and his son Gareth caught up with Seth in the library one day and beat him badly. Gareth was only allowed to stay because Seth spoke up for him, and said his father was forcing him to do it. Besides which, Gareth turned out to be Barney’s mate, from the library, and Barney offered to keep the young rabbit in check.”
Fergus’s head was swimming and he had to sit upright. Cam didn’t look upset. In fact, he seemed perfectly happy considering the bombshell Fergus had dropped on him. “You’re telling me, even though this Alpha Simpson person was a full rabbit and the leader of the rabbit colony in town, the townspeople voted to banish him, and Seth was allowed to stay?”
“It’s not what you are, it’s what you do that matters in this town,” Cam said calmly. “What Alpha Simpson did was wrong on so many levels it wasn’t funny. Not only did he beat Seth and could have caused damage to his unborn cubs, but Simpson insisted the members of his colony only mate with other rabbits. He refused to accept same sex matings. He bribed the mayor and sheriff at the time, trying to get them on his side, but the townspeople prevailed and voted against him. That’s the way it is in this town.”
“So, everyone would have to vote on whether or not I’d be allowed to stay in town?” Fergus tried to work out what percentage of the townspeople he sold his baking to.
Cam’s fingers framed his face. “Babe, I promise you, the townspeople only vote to banish people who do something wrong. It’s part of our laws here. The whole town votes before someone is banished or punished for any wrong doing. Being a hybrid is just a fact of life. It’s not a crime. You’ve got as much right to be here as anyone else who lives in Arrowtown.”
“But I’m not a full shifter.” Fergus couldn’t believe it could be that easy. He’d carried his secret for years, made to feel ashamed about his heritage before he understood what the concept meant.
“You shifted the day I met you, into the most beautiful bull I’ve ever seen.” Cam was so calm, so self-assured, but Fergus got a hint through their bond that he might have upset his mate slightly when Cam asked, “Why would you think you couldn’t be accepted here? How could you think I could hate you for having a secret like that?”
“Years of social conditioning? I genuinely thought right up until two minutes ago, every shifter felt the same way my fold leader did.” Fergus shrugged but Cam’s facial expression didn’t change. Wiggling a bit, to get more comfortable which wasn’t easy with Cam’s length distracting him by poking him in the leg, Fergus laid his head on his mate’s shoulder, and took a deep breath.
“I guess it’s time to tell you a story. Once upon a time, in a far-off land, a young heifer was enjoying her time at college. She knew there was a mate chosen for her, back at the fold, as was the tradition of her group, but no one knew about that at the college so she was free to have fun and enjoy life like any young shifter should.”
“She sounds like a sensible young heifer.” Cam’s arms came around Fergus’s waist and settled there.
“She tried to be; she really did. But this was the first time the young heifer had been away from the fold and her family. There were so many people around, human and paranormal alike. She joined groups, made friends, and over time she made a very special friend. She knew their relationship wouldn’t be sanctioned by the fold leader, but she was young and in love for the first time…”
“These things happen,” Cam said when Fergus trailed off, imagining his momma in love. “What happened to the loving couple?”
Fergus shook off his romantic musings. “The ending wasn’t pretty,” he said, his heart feeling like the lump in his throat. “The paranormal wooed her with promises of forever love and a bond. She was so excited, thinking she could leave her fold forever and share her life with someone who loved her as much as she loved him. One night, two others suddenly appeared in the room they were sharing, the sheets still damp from their love making. ‘It’s time to come home,’ they apparently said, and the man just got up and got dressed. When the young heifer cried, asking about the promises he’d made, he laughed in her face. Said the babe in her belly would turn her into a fat cow he had no intention of staying with, let alone taking as a bond mate. He was still laughing at her when him and his friends just disappeared. She never saw him again.”
Cam’s head rested on the top of Fergus’s skull. “I’m so sorry. Some people are just assholes. What happened to the young heifer? Did she go back to her fold?”
“She didn’t have a choice. The college wouldn’t allow her to stay when they found out she was expecting, and she had no money of her own. The leader was very angry, claimed no other fold youngster would ever go out into a corrupt world again. The mate that had been selected for her was forced to go through the bonding, but the young heifer became nothing more than an unpaid servant for the fold leader.”
“And the baby from this union – what happened to them?”
Fergus took a couple of breaths to center himself. He’d spent a long time with his memories packed away and it hurt to bring them out again. “He was born into a world where the only safe place was his momma’s arms, where the only words of love he heard were from his momma. He was shunned by the others and grew up never knowing why everyone around him was so mean to him when they weren’t to others. It was only when he shifted for the first time, so proud of his lovely bull form that stood strong and proud among the others, that he realized the true depth of the fold’s hatred for people of mixed heritage.”
“Oh, hon. I’m so sorry.” Cam’s arms around him tightened.
“It wasn’t so bad.” Fergus took a shaky breath. “The leader was getting more and more demanding of the fold members, restricting when they could work, and what they could do with their money. His distrust of the world outside the fold got worse with every passing year. But momma was really good at squirreling away a dollar here and a dollar there. No one cared when I went out and got a job because I wasn’t useful for fold security or anything like that. We scrimped and saved and dreamed of freedom under the big oak tree in the leader’s back yard…” Fergus’s eyes filled with tears.
“Shush, shush, hon. It’s okay,” Cam soothed. “What happened to those dreams you shared with your momma?”
“Her bond mate smashed them.” Fergus felt physically ill. All the feelings he’d felt at the time came back as though it’d happened yesterday. “On the morning of my eighteenth birthday me and momma were supposed to meet at the edge of the fold territory. It was only two miles walk to the nearest bus stop. I had a change of clothes for both of us, and the money we’d saved together. But when I got there, momma was already there, along with her bond mate, his two brothers and the fold leader.
They were holding her so tight; they wouldn’t even let me hug her.”
“The leader wouldn’t let her leave with you?”
“That’s not what was said at the time.” Silent tears rolled down Fergus’s cheeks, soaking Cam’s shirt. “The leader said he wasn’t going to allow any member of his fold to be corrupted by the outside world. That shifters mated with shifters and because I was a hybrid and thereby cursed, I wasn’t welcome in the fold. He said the moment I stepped outside of the fold territory I was permanently dead to them all and would be killed on sight if I came back.”
“Your momma wouldn’t have accepted that, surely. Why didn’t she go with you?”
“She pushed me over the territory boundary,” Fergus sobbed. “I thought she was coming with me. The leader pushed her towards me. I went to grab her, to help her cross the line, and she pushed me. I stumbled over the boundary and her mate and brothers pulled guns on me. That’s when they dragged her away. She was screaming she loved me and to always remain fabulous. It took me five years of searching, to find a way to contact her again and when I did, it was only then I learned the leader had threatened to chase us both and kill us the moment we left the territory unless she stayed and tried to have more calves with her bond mate. I didn’t realize she’d barely let him touch her the whole time I was growing up. Now, I have a half-brother and a half-sister I’ve never seen.”
Fergus gave in to his grief then. The pain of being away from the only woman who’d loved him, the torture she’d endured just because she’d given her heart to someone who didn’t cherish it, the life she’d led after he’d gone, all the pain she’d gone through for most of her life, all because of him.
Chapter Fifteen