by Jenny Rabe
“When I finally asked him about it, the pressure that had been building inside him exploded. He never hit me, but he came close to it. He apologized the next day and said he would look into getting help. The VA offered counseling, but it was hard to get in, and once a week wasn’t nearly the help he needed. The mix of prescriptions, the added pressure from our families, and my added frustration of not being able to help was too much.”
She buried her head in Brian’s chest and sobbed. He held her tightly against him, running his fingers through her hair.
Her voice was shaky as she continued. “Five months after we’d been married, Shawn shot himself in the room he’d holed himself in for weeks.” She looked up at him with swollen eyes. “I still remember how the sound shook the glass on the windows. That’s why I had to get away from it all. I couldn’t stay there.”
He pressed his lips to her hair. “I’m sorry you’re going through this.” She didn’t say anything more, and he didn’t ask. Instead, he held her, letting her cry. Finally, she pulled away and wiped her face with her shirt.
“Do you want to rest some more?” he asked. “I’ll stay right here.”
She lifted her head to him, their faces inches away. He wanted so badly to kiss her, but knew this wasn’t the right time.
“Mmm, yeah. I probably should.”
He smiled and moved a pillow to his lap. Without prompting, she snuggled against it, and he rubbed her back as her eyes closed. He ran a hand over her soft, sweet-smelling hair, interweaving it between his fingers. She sighed, and Brian couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this needed.
Somehow, he had to help Cambria. More than anything, Brian wanted to make sure she didn’t move away from Harker Heights. Even though the website needed to be finished, he would stay up and work all night if it meant he could keep her in his arms for now.
* * *
“Brian? Brian, wake up.”
He startled awake, reaching out for Cambria, but only pulled the throw pillow in his lap closer. Cambria stood next to the window, her hair wet and swooped up in a bun, her clothes changed. She wore a pair of overall shorts, a green shirt, and an orange, printed bandana across her forehead. Her colorful look was adorable.
She smiled at him. “Looks like I wasn’t the only tired person here. Your practice starts in thirty minutes.”
Brian checked his watch. Was it already that late? His equipment was in his car, but he didn’t want to leave. “Maybe I shouldn’t show?”
Cambria shook her head. “No way. I haven’t seen you practice in days.”
Wait, she wanted to come with him? That changed everything.
“Plus, don’t you have your first game tonight?”
Brian slapped his head and stood. He gathered his laptop and camera and headed for the door. His heart lifted when she followed with a pad and paper in her hands. “Wait, how did you know about my—”
“I kind of stole your baseball schedule.” Cambria showed him the screenshot of his schedule on her phone.
Brian grinned. This girl surprised him every day. “So you want to come with me?”
She beamed up at him. Rest had done so much good for her. “I do, if you don’t mind.”
Brian remembered she hadn’t eaten all day. He held up his index finger for her to wait and went back to the kitchen where he’d put away breakfast.
Her eyes questioned him as he returned with his hands full. He lifted the paper bag of sugary goodness. “Donuts, because you need to eat. Orange juice because it’s delicious. And a banana because I feel guilty handing you so much sugar.”
She laughed and took the food. “Okay, let’s go.”
On the way to the baseball fields, Brian stole a glance at her. “So, tell me, why the pad and paper? Do you really like my face that much?” Her cheeks turned watermelon pink, and he smiled.
“Well, I guess I should start at the beginning. But since you have a game in twenty minutes I’ll give you the fast version.” She told him how she had been going through a dry spell in her work, not finishing any of the faces in any of her paintings. And then proceeded to tell him about her feelings the day he bumped into her.
“It was like seeing your face jogged something in my memory, and I couldn’t let that inspiration go. So I went home, changed into that horribly hot jacket and watched you as you played.”
“Yeah that was a little unnerving.”
She bit her lip. “I know. I’m sorry about that. But that night, I was able to finish my first painting. But the next day, it was like the inspiration had fled during the night and I needed to see your face again.”
Hope fluttered inside Brian’s chest, awakening a beast he’d forced to remain dormant for too long. She needed to see my face?
“I started coming to as many practices as I could. I tried not to always hang around the bleachers so you wouldn’t be too suspicious, but that’s the best view, so I risked it sometimes. And then I saw you at the grief meeting and we got partnered together. I guess I was a bit spoiled to see you so much.”
Brian smiled to himself, pleased she felt something for him, even if it was only inspiration for her art. “Well, I’m flattered that my face could help.”
She snorted. “Well, don’t let it get to your head.”
He parked as close to the field as he could, but the parking lot was packed with people coming to their first game. Since May hated baseball and he had no one else to watch him play, it felt good knowing he’d have someone cheering him on. He walked her to the stands where excited crowds were gathering. The aroma of hot dogs and nachos gave the event the right nostalgic feel.
Before Brian left her in the bleachers, Cambria grabbed the front of his shirt and moved him toward her. For a second, he thought she would kiss him, but instead, she grabbed his face in her hands and pointed to the field. “Now, I don’t know much about baseball, but I do know a lot about perception. Rule of thirds. Imagine that the field you are staring at is cut into thirds. First base on one side, second, and then third. In art, we are drawn to the most important part of the picture.”
His eyes focused in on her lips as she talked, rosy and smooth. So kissable.
She snapped her fingers and then smiled when his eyes lifted to meet hers. “See, focus. The reason you can’t catch any balls is because your focus is on the hitter, not where the ball will land. Most hitters do not hit straight across. That’s too easy. If you focus slightly to the left or right, you’ll see your mistake.”
Brian blinked. “I think you’ve been watching me too closely. I’m pretty sure you have a thing for me.”
Cambria opened her mouth. “Why would you thi—” She continued to sputter as he left her on the bleachers. Other fans were showing up, ready to support their own baseball player. “Remember, rule of thirds.”
Brian spun around, an idea growing in his mind. “Let’s say you’re right. If that works and I catch a ball, you have to go out with me tonight. Dinner. Nothing fancy. Just eating and talking.”
Cambria folded her arms across her chest, but he knew he’d won. “Okay, fine. If you catch a ball, we can get dinner afterward.”
Brian turned back around before he fist-pumped the air. The thought of being with her after the game buoyed him up.
Now if only he could catch a ball.
“Dude, you came with the girl?” Rob said to him as he entered the dugout.
Brian looked to the bleachers. Cambria’s head was dipped low, sketching a new picture. Of what? Of him? A shiver of excitement rolled down his back.
“Yeah. Can’t explain it. I guess we’re friends now. The flowers worked their magic.” They couldn’t really be more than that right now. That was okay with him. Just being near her made him happier.
“Friends?” Rob scoffed. “Yeah right. She grabbed your face and pretty much kissed you. Just now.”
Brian shook his head. No, she hadn’t. He would’ve remembered that. “She was teaching me about some art rule. Rule of thirds or somethi
ng.” Rob looked more confused. “Never mind. She was trying to help me with my catching skills.”
“She was?”
Brian shrugged. “Made sense actually. We’ll just have to see if it works. If it does and I catch a ball, she said we could go out.”
“So you’re more than just friends, then?”
“No, just as friends.”
Rob made a grunting noise. “Sounds like you’re dating her.”
Brian shrugged, remembering how exciting things with Violet had been in the beginning. Just because Cambria wasn’t a news reporter didn’t mean she wouldn’t turn him in as soon as she knew his secrets. “I don’t know if I should after everything that has happened.”
Rob grinned. “Not every relationship will end up on the news. Give her a chance.”
His friend had a point. “I guess I better catch something then.”
During halftime, his phone flashed with a text from an unknown number. His heart sank. Not again. With some hesitation, he read the message.
Looks like you have a new girlfriend. Maybe we can do an article on her next.
Brian whipped around. Who was watching him? Families of the players were everywhere, grabbing food during the break and talking with each other. The first game was always the best attended. No one’s eyes seemed trained on him, except for Cambria’s. She smiled and mimed catching a ball, probably because he hadn’t caught one yet. But should he, now that he knew someone was watching? The last thing he wanted to do was tie Cambria into something messy.
No one looked his way, but Brian knew someone was there. They must be. How else would they know? He looked back to Cambria, but she’d gone back to her sketching.
Someone had found him, and now they were after Cambria. He didn’t want her grief to be discovered and smeared across newspapers. If he had any say in it, that wouldn’t happen. She’d been through enough.
Chapter Fifteen
Cambria
Cambria stood up and cheered with the other fans as Brian lifted his glove and caught his first ball and the other team’s third out.
“Way to go, Brian!”
His team members patted him on the back as he came running toward the dugout, the caught ball held triumphantly in the air. He’d done it.
The bases had been loaded with the other team’s players and there were only a few minutes left on the clock. Since Brian’s team, the Texas Rangers, were in the lead, his magnificent catch meant the game was practically over.
She gathered her sketches and slid them into her bag. After her special army project, she knew exactly what project she wanted to move on to next. The many faces and poses of baseball players. It had been so much fun observing Brian and his teammates play. They were so funny, licking their lips, rubbing the home plate before they swung their bats, and even Brian, his mouth full of gum. She didn’t know so many superstitions were involved with baseball.
After the game ended, she waited by the back fence for him, not wanting to be in the way. What a day it had been. This morning when she saw Brian at the door, she never thought the day would end with a smile on her face. But now . . .
So many possibilities lay ahead of her. She never thought she’d be interested in anyone after Shawn. But this morning had shown her that there was still room in her heart. The other night, the guilt of being interested in another man overwhelmed her. How could she move on when Shawn couldn’t live? But then Brian had showed up the next morning, a ray of sunshine and hope.
She almost didn’t open the door to him when she saw him through the peephole, but some feeling inside pushed her to do it. When he took over, making sure she rested, her heart melted, and she knew she’d been wrong. If nothing else, she knew Shawn loved her, even in his worst moments. He wouldn’t have wanted her to be unhappy. She wasn’t sure where things were heading, but she knew she had Brian’s friendship.
Most of the crowd had cleared out by the time Brian had gathered his things and said his goodbyes. She brightened as he came toward her. His head was down, typing something into his phone.
“Hey there,” she said. “It’s too bad you caught that ball. Now someone owes me dinner.”
Brian looked up for the first time, not meeting her eyes. “Yeah, your trick worked. Thanks.”
Cambria’s smile disappeared. Something was wrong. “Everything okay?”
Brian glanced at his watch. “Yeah, everything is fine. Dinner will have to wait though. A few things came up.”
Cambria tried to hide her disappointment. Dinner with him was all she could think about since he was sent to the outfield. And now they weren’t going?
They were quiet as they walked to his truck. She stared out at the window as she waited for him to get in. Maybe she had been wrong about everything, and he was only interested in being a good friend. That wasn’t the worst thing ever, but it sent her mind into a spiral of unhappy thoughts.
After he started the car, he turned toward her. “I really hate going back on my word, but I promise I’ll make it up to you.”
She shook her head.
“It’s okay, really. You’ve been so great. Thank you for being there for me today.”
He was probably just tired. It had been a long day. A long, wonderful day and she didn’t want to end it by doubting herself.
Finally, he met her eyes, his eyes sparkling like emeralds in the fading sun. “It really was a good day. I took some pictures of your work, and I should have your website up and running by tomorrow.”
Cambria widened her eyes. “Really? That’s great. I can’t believe I slept for that long.”
Brian nodded. “By this time tomorrow, all of your paintings will be up for the world to see.”
Cambria gave a tentative smile. “Does that mean I’ll be seeing you tomorrow?”
Brian pulled up to her house and killed the engine. “Yeah, for a little bit.” His frown returned, and all the uncertainty that Cambria had pushed down deep came rising to the surface.
The Walkers waved at them from their front porch. Oh boy! What would they think of Brian?
“Well, thank you again for all of your help.” Cambria leaned over to hug him.
Brian hugged her back, but it felt forced. “Of course. I would do the same for anybody.”
Cambria backed away. The temperature in the car rose ten degrees. She was overthinking this. Of course he would be nice to a struggling widow. She looked down at his hands. Would he have spent hours holding other people, playing with their hair, and helping them start their own business too?
“Okay,” she said, drawing out the word. “See you, then.”
A frown crossed his face, but a second later, it had cleared of all emotion. “See you.”
When she closed his truck door, the snap sounded too harsh.
“Everything okay, sweetie?” Mrs. Walker called out to her.
She nodded but pursed her lips together. Things had moved too fast in Cambria’s head, and she had scared him off. She escaped inside, not turning back to see Brian drive away as she closed the door.
After a deep breath, she spun around to look at the picture on the wall. Shawn’s eyes didn’t seem as accusatory as last night, but she still felt horrible. She moved down the hallway, not wanting to stay in the entryway too long.
She stopped moving as one painting caught her attention, the one of the baseball player. It was hanging with the others. Brian must have hung it up. Maybe that had freaked him out, and that’s why he was pushing her away. She sighed and headed into her workroom. It also meant the painting would be on the website. Maybe letting it go would help.
She grabbed her laptop and stared longingly at the paint supplies she needed to continue her project. Even though she had plenty of finished paintings, she felt there were at least half a dozen more she needed to add to this collection.
She reluctantly added a few supplies to her shopping cart and paid for them with her only credit card. She cringed as she stared at the final amount on the screen. Taking
a deep breath and whispering a prayer to herself, she submitted the order and closed the laptop.
If her paintings were going on sale tomorrow, and she even sold one by the end of the week, it would more than cover the expense of all of her purchases. She may have struck out with Brian tonight, but hopefully her luck hadn’t run out altogether.
Chapter Sixteen
Brian
Hi,” Cambria said when she opened the door the next morning. “Ready to sell some paintings?”
Brian’s eyes traveled from her face down to her barefoot toes. She had a navy blue blouse on and jean shorts. A smile started to grow on his face before he could stop it. “Wow, your hair. I’ve never seen it so straight.”
She ran a hand through it, sending a whiff of strawberry shampoo toward him. “Glad you like it.”
Brian frowned. He didn’t need to like her anymore, especially when he was under the scrutiny of a potential enemy. “We better get started. I have a busy day and need to get going soon.”
“Okay.” Her shoulders fell a bit as she led him to the kitchen bar and sat on a stool.
He stared at the seat next to her and then moved to stand across the counter. It proved difficult when pointing things out on his computer, and eventually, he stepped a little closer.
He opened up her website and slid over the laptop. He studied it as she saw it for the first time. Muted navy, green, and white checkered patterns decorated the bulk of the screen with a crème bar of tabs. They included a Biography tab she still needed to fill out, Art for Sale, and a Giving Back tab.
She clicked on the Giving Back tab.
Pictures of their graffiti project popped up, the before and after pictures, and even some he’d snuck of her power washing the wall.
“Wow, that’s—” She stopped talking and stared at him.
Her praise made his toes tingle. He’d spent all night making sure everything was perfect. It was the least he could do after the way he’d treated her.