At the end of the first day, Rachel hadn't been called to the witness stand, Nathan's barrister stating that Beth had entered a mutual relationship with Nathan and whilst it was a breach of the rules and the ethical code at the University, he had in fact committed no crime and the prosecutor was attempting to persuade the jury as the evidence against his client was without substance.
The second day continued with the prosecutor and it was the first time that Rachel would be brought up on the stand. The prosecutor had advised that Logan would be best presented as the lead on the case in fear of a bias argument coming from the defence. Rachel was too strong willed to be told what to do now and had insisted strongly that it would only be right for her to take to the stand.
The last time she had seen Nathan was the second before she became unconscious with his hand gripped tightly around her neck. She walked into the court room and couldn't prevent herself from looking at him, he refused to look back, staring straight down at the floor, as he had done the previous day also. She stood there waiting for the questioning.
'DS Rachel Lambert, you collected evidence from Catherine Holmes apartment. Can you clarify what evidence was that?'
Rachel answered the question without hesitation, almost robotic moving into autopilot as she would with any other case. The evidence was clear, the saliva and semen found in Catherine's apartment had been matched to Nathan after he had been arrested. It proved that he had been involved in a sexual relationship with Catherine.
'DS Lambert. Is it correct that you are the wife of the defendant?' the defence barrister questioned her.
'Yes, but-'
'Thank you DS Lambert,' he cut her off before she could continue. 'No further questions your honour,' he added before resuming his seat.
It was a bold move but the jury began looking at one another, shocked by the revelation. It had done the trick questioning the authenticity of Rachel's statements from now on. It had brought the whole investigation into question now and the Jason expected that to happen. He insisted that Rachel be removed from the witness list, but the judge refused to change now, there was no other option but to continue, Rachel adamant that the rest of the evidence would prove Nathan's guilt beyond doubt.
After a short adjournment, Rachel was back in the witness box and Jason was asking the questions. 'DS Lambert when you suspected it was your husband of Catherine's murder why did you continue with the case?'
'I had doubts whether I should or not. I considered it throughout the rest of the investigation. I asked to stay on the case.'
'What made you come to that decision?'
'Because I only suspected him, I had no definitive proof that he had murdered Catherine. I suppose in a perfect world I would have never been involved with the case from the start, but the if it was perfect world I would not have a job, would I?'
'Thank you DS Lambert,' Jason stated with a smile. He knew there would always be bias at some level or not. Can you say a juror who had lost a relative due to a drunk driver would ever be forgiving of anyone else committing the same crime? They wouldn't, they would be the first in line to throw the book at them. It was another imperfection in an imperfect world.
Jason pressed heavily now with the evidence, at the end of the day there was no hiding away from that and he knew when that was all laid down in front of the jury they couldn't deny that Nathan had murdered Catherine. Jason quizzed pathologist (check on name) about the red fibre that was found on Catherine's body. It matched the structure, content and colour of Nathan's favourite jumper that Rachel had discovered in the bottom of the wardrobe.
Rachel's and Nathan's home was searched after he was arrested and the jumper was immediately confiscated for evidence, it was been presented as evidence. Nathan was still focused on the floor, refusing to look anywhere else, he couldn't bring himself to accept the looks just yet. The bedside lamp, albeit in pieces had contained enough DNA to prove that it was the murder weapon and had Nathan's fingerprints all over it. There was now nowhere to hide and the defence barrister had run out of steam.
◆◆◆
Rachel woke up still laid on her settee in the lounge, she had not spent a night in the marital bed since she had been discharged from hospital over a week ago and today would be the day she finally got closure and could start making plans to move on. She rolled off the edge of the sofa moving onto her feet, her dressing gown covering her lose pair a joggers and a tiny vest top. She needed a shower, even though she was not at all dirty, she was having several showers a day, they never made a difference.
She heard a knock at the door, without looking at the clock she knew it was around eight, Tanya had been there at the same time all week, she had been taking advantage of the favour she had been owed and was now into her second week of being released from duty.
'Are you not ready?' Tanya observed when she was greeted to Rachel standing there in her dressing gown.
'Yes Tan, I'm going like this, what's up?'
'I'm not taking you to court like that,' she responded looking disgusted. Rachel shook her head, while she invited Tanya inside.
Twenty minutes later and Rachel and Tanya were leaving and heading back to York Crown Court. Rachel had handed the keys over to Tanya, she was not in the mood to drive, sat in the passenger seat fiddling with the stereo much to the annoyance of Tanya.
'Will you pick a station Rach. I know it's not going to be the best of days, but keep doing that is starting to piss me off,' she said calmly.
'Well I thought I would be the one with the attitude today. What's going on?' Tanya looked forward, concentrating on the road ahead, 'come on Tan, what the hell is going on?'
She coughed, 'I'm just worried about you Rach. Do you think you need to go today?' she continued. 'Inside I know you are hurting Rach and you haven't said anything about it all week. Nathan tried killing you and you haven't shown any emotion,' she paused while Rachel looked through the windscreen this time. 'I know you are not that strong and I'm really concerned that you have reached the edge of the cliff and I don't want to watch you jump.'
'Tan-'
'I'm just saying we can always go and watch one of those tacky rom-com's where everybody ends up happily ever after. We really don't need to be there today.'
'Tanya! I need closure. I...I need...I don't know what I need!'
'You do. You know exactly what you need. The dashboard can take your frustration.' Rachel gave a gentle punch to the dashboard, barely hard enough to even make a sound. 'That's not a punch Rach,' Tanya said chuckling. 'Where is the anger?'
Rachel shook her head, 'I am angry. I'm angry all the time Tan. I don't know what else to do though. What would you do? We all cope with our problems in a different way and I need to see the bastard get what he deserves. That's why I'm going to that court today.' This time she hit the dashboard with venom.
'OK. Don't set of the airbag though in the process, we'll be there before you know it.'
Nathan was dressed in his finest suit again with a fresh crisp clean white shirt and an highly polished pair of black shoes that gleamed so much he could see his own reflection in them. He was escorted to the dock has he had been all week and was standing when the judge entered. He had accepted the guilty verdict long before the jury had even been decided. He knew what he had done and he was ready to face the truth. He had given up, he knew he was going to be facing jail time, it was now just a question of how long!
The judge began is summary, a list of why Nathan was a threat to society, he wasn't listening, he had tuned out. Rachel and Tanya were standing in the public gallery, Nathan knew they were there, still not looking at either of them but feeling their presence there. He had so much he wanted to say to Rachel, she wouldn't listen and he knew that, but he still wanted to speak to her. He had held it in all the time he had been there, he was damaged and he didn't know how to start to make amends. The tears began to run uncontrollable, he didn't want to but they just simple ran.
'I'm sorry,' he said hesitantl
y.
'Please Mr Lambert can you refrain from offering comment at this time?' the Judge asked.
'I'm so very sorry Rach,' he said a bit louder. 'Please forgive me,' he looked up at her.
She stared hard back at him with venom in her eyes. 'You don't get to ask me that you bastard!' she shouted from the public gallery.
'I will not tolerate...' the Judge began to speak but before he could finish Rachel turned and stormed out of the court followed shortly by Tanya.
'I will continue now I hope there will be no further interruptions.' The judge continued to sentence Nathan, he sighed when the announcement came. Nathan had been sentenced to twenty-five years without the chance of parole for at minimum term of fifteen years.
Chapter 49
Rachel arrived back home, exhausted and left with a giant hole inside her, she had hoped that being in court over the past three days, may have brought her some form of closure to the matter. She had been wrong. She walked through the front door of her marital home, the place where her and Nathan were building a life together. The place she expected to fetch her first child home to. The spare bedroom, which had wardrobes for extra storage for the pair had been planned as a nursery since the day the pair bought the three-bedroom semi-detached property in a respectable part of York.
Her home still smelt of him and at the same time didn't smell of him. His Hugo Boss cologne was distinct enough for her to recognise immediately but it wasn't that what she was smelling. It was the smell of home. The mixture of his Hugo Boss cologne with her Chanel perfume and the Lavender candle that had been burning away in the kitchen mixed with the smell of last nights Chinese in the rubbish bin and the smell of laundry powder was ever in the air and proceeded
All of them combined were her and Nathan's scent of home. It was that smell that reminded her of him as she walked through the door. It was the smell that made her want to disinfect the every inch of the house. If she had the energy or motivation she probably would have been too. She had filled a bucket of warm water and washing up liquid and it had been on the side in the kitchen for two days now, the water was no longer warm. She had refused to allow herself to sleep in their bed. She considered taking it to pieces and having a large bonfire in the back garden.
The day of Nathan's arrest, after she had returned from the hospital after being checked over by the doctors, she had cleared the wardrobes and drawers of his clothes and thrown them in large black bin bags. She had filled almost ten bags in total with clothes, pictures, anniversary presents and little trinkets given to her by him. She was angry. She wanted every shred of him out of the house.
She hated the smell, on the fridge was a magnetic small notepad and pen, she wrote 'candles' on it. The first of her new items she wanted to buy herself. She wanted the smell gone and the best way she thought of that being accomplished would be to fill the house with new scents, cinnamon, lemon or peppermint. She didn't care which scents, she just wanted a different one. She opened the fridge, looking inside, she had not been grocery shopping and the shelves were now bare. Some leftover chicken she cooked four days ago and was very cautious about eating now, a small block of cheese, half a tub of Greek Yoghurt, a couple of cans of fizzy pop and a bottle of unopened white Zinfandel. Take away and a bottle of wine for supper tonight, she thought to herself.
She moved into the living room lifting the orange checkered blanket, spread across the sofa and wrapped it around herself. She had her favourite Chinese takeaway menu in her hand and her mobile phone in the other, glancing down at the dishes on the menu she decided to order a mixed starter, king prawn mushrooms and a side order of fries and prawn crackers. She was hungry.
With her supper ordered she lifted up the remote for the satellite television and after turning the television on, she began searching through the list of movies available to watch. She was not in the mood for watching a movie. Romantic comedies would remind her off her marriage or disaster of a marriage. Action would only bore her. Fantasy, she didn't have the concentration for and horror would only give her nightmares.
She cushioned herself deep into the padding of the sofa, hoping in some small way to be sucked up whole by it, her mind racing now with ridiculous thoughts. She couldn't help it and no matter how much the logical side of her brain kicked in and warned her that the current path could be very slippy. She was unable to steady herself. The clock on the wall above the television ticked away at its usual constant rhythm.
One minute had passed, then five, then ten, before she knew it almost thirty minutes had gone by in the blink of an eye. She couldn't recollect a single second of the documentary that had been playing away on the television and now the credits were rolling upwards set to a sultry piano melody. She watched the final credits finish scrolling up and then kept her eyes on the following advert. With a singing cat on her screen, she was drawn away by a knock at her door.
She lept up grabbing her purse from her handbag that she had left on the chest of drawers behind the lounge door and made her way to the front door, her stomach grumbling all the way. She opened the door blindly looking at her purse whilst sorting through her money ready to pay the delivery man, 'how much do I owe you?'
'Depends on how long you want me to stay,' replied a familiar female voice.
Rachel recognised the voice instantly, 'all night if you want?' she replied.
Tanya was standing on the doorstep with her arms open out wide ready for Rachel to fall into them, she flopped uncontrollable almost sending Tanya backwards off her feet.
'Glad to see you too Rach!' Tanya said whilst steadying herself. 'I've brought wine, thought you may fancy a drink or two.'
Rachel loosened her grip around her and stepped back into her home. Tears were beginning to build in the corner of her eyes and once safely inside she allowed them to roll down her cheeks. She began feeling a wave of relief flood over her. She led the way into the lounge. Tanya followed closely feeling the tension radiating from her friend with her shoulders pitched upwards.
'What did you have planned for tonight Rach? Drinking and a takeaway?'
'You know me too well Tan. That's exactly what I have planned. I can call and add to the order if you want?'
'It's OK Rach, already had something to eat. Thanks anyway!'
Rachel nodded and took up her seat on the sofa, while Tanya walked across the room and plunged into the armchair. The padding consuming her petite frame and she let out a sigh, 'I'm taking this chair home with me Rach. Mine is as hard as rock in comparison!'
'Good luck putting that on the back of your motorbike,' Rachel said laughing. It felt good, the first time in a week she has felt natural laughter break from her. She has place a brave face on when asked by friends, relatives and colleagues the inevitable question, 'are you alright?'. She hated that question, it was always said in a sympathetic tone, clearly knowing the answer to be no. She never said no though. She was fine! She was coping! She was fighting through it! Several different ways of saying she felt like shit really but didn't want to talk about it!
A moment later there was a knock at the door, Tanya jumped up telling Rachel to stay put and ran off towards the door. She had already gone before Rachel had had the chance to grab her purse, she could hear voices and then seconds later Tanya's head popped around the corner of the lounge door. She wasn't able to say a word before Rachel had pointed over to the chest of drawers were she had dumped her purse on when she walked back into the lounge with Tanya.
Twenty minutes late and there were just empty boxes and cartons left laying on top of the glass coffee table sitting in the middle of the lounge. Rachel, who had not previously been eating properly, had sunk her teeth into the takeaway like a ravenous wild animal. She felt better with a full stomach, it wasn't a solution but for now it was pain relief and so was having Tanya there.
'So Rach. You and Logan buried the hatchet?'
'You mean other than his skull?' she replied as the pair of them giggled. 'We have an understanding.'
'You know me Tan. I'll bounce back,' she said twirling her wedding ring around her finger.
'You need to take that off Rach,' Tanya said observing and looking down at her fingers.
Rachel looked back up at Tanya. 'I don't know if I'm ready,' she said, her voice drained of all emotion. 'I took it off the day we arrested him. Left it on the bathroom windowsill.' She stood up from the sofa and moved over towards the fireplace. Nathan had made it from combining three old railway sleepers into a n-shape and then hand carved delicate rose heads in full bloom along the front. She was so proud of him when he had finished it. The first time he mentioned it to her she raised her eyebrows, not expecting him to be able to carve, but he had. It was the centerpiece of the lounge and anyone who visited complimented it.
They were building an home together and now it was destroyed, burned to the ground all around her and she no longer had the will or strength to sweep away the ashes and rebuild. On top in the middle was the picture of her and Nathan on their wedding day, both with huge smiles and starring deeply into one another's eyes, straight out of any romance novel. It had been the happiest day of her life, it was cliched, but still true. She had never been one to chase marriage. Nathan had changed that. She had fallen instantly for him, his eyes, cheekbones and rounded jaw made him appeal, she could have looked at that face for hours.
She lifted up the photograph, filled with anger, sorrow, frustration, despair, regret and finally relief. The emotions came in waves, not one for any length, all for short periods and in sharp rigid bursts leaving her confused at how she was feeling and when the waves had calmed and the wind had seized, she was left numb, vacant in a lost wasteland. That feeling she hated more than the others. It stripped her of who she was, the determination and motivation, the passion and the desire, the fun and laughter, everything! She was left slouched on the sofa like a fish out of water, breathless and with no option but to watch the light pass her. Raising the photograph with both arms above her head, she threw it as hard as she could into the empty fireplace, with the sound of smashing glass filling the void.
Catherine Page 25