Once a Soldier

by Mary Jo Putney

  Interestingly, Jean Marie was equally solicitous, riding on Justin’s other side and keeping a keen eye on him. He had the instincts of a really good personal servant.

  Will also cared about his friend’s welfare, but even more, he cared about San Gabriel and its defense, so he took Justin at his word. They rode at a brisk pace with few breaks, and those more for the horses than the riders.

  Sofia was intensely grateful when they finally reached the castle. Justin was gray with pain and fatigue and in danger of pitching headlong from his horse. Will helped him to dismount safely and held him upright until both grooms emerged from the stables, looking worried.

  “Mr. Ballard was wounded in an attack,” Sofia explained. “Miguel, help Corporal Paget get Mr. Ballard up to his room. Sancho, ride into town and bring Dr. de Ataide here as quickly as you can.”

  The grooms stared at Jean Marie in horror. “A French soldier!” Miguel said, aghast. “Have you gone mad, your highness? Is this brute threatening you?”

  “Señor Paget is no longer a French soldier,” Sofia said flatly. “He has pledged a solemn oath to San Gabriel. He will help you guide Mr. Ballard upstairs to his room.”

  Miguel opened his mouth to say more. Sofia cut him off sharply. “Do you question my judgment?”

  Miguel swallowed hard. “No, Princess.” He moved to Justin and slid an arm around his waist, while Jean Marie took a similar hold on Justin’s other side.

  Speaking English, Justin said with a whisper of mischief, “You sound more like a queen every day, my princess. The frightening sort.”

  As the men started moving him toward the castle, Justin’s coat fell away from his torso and she saw fresh bloodstains on his bandaged chest. Horrified, she said, “That means I can give you orders, you Scottish peasant! You are going up to your room and you will stay there until the surgeon pronounces you fit!”

  “Or you’ll have me beheaded? Yes, your majesty,” he said meekly, but his eyes glinted with humor before he started up the steps and had to suppress a gasp of pain.

  Biting her lip, Sofia followed Justin and his helpers up to his room. He groaned as they laid him gently on the coverlet of his bed and his eyes closed. He was still gray with exhaustion, but at least he was lying down rather than jostling along on horseback.

  Sofia thanked the two men, adding, “Miguel, you’re needed with the horses. You saw that we came back with more than we left with.”

  He nodded. “Skinny beasts, but with proper care they’ll be useful. What happened to their riders?”

  “Six renegade French soldiers made the mistake of attacking our party,” she said tersely. “Five of them didn’t live long enough to regret it. Jean Marie, will you help Mr. Ballard take his coat off?”

  Miguel left for the stables and Jean Marie gently raised Justin enough to remove the coat. The bleeding seemed to have stopped, but Sofia wouldn’t be happy until the surgeon had examined his wounds and given him fresh bandages.

  When Justin was resting again, Sofia said, “Jean Marie, you’d best take off your French uniform coat now. No one has forgotten the French invasion last year, and I don’t want you to be killed by accident.”

  “I don’t want that, either, Princess,” he said fervently as he peeled off his worn blue coat.

  Eyes still closed, Justin said, “If you don’t mind removing the bloodstains, you can have the one you took off me. It will be a little large now, but should fit well enough once you’ve put on some weight.”

  “You would give me your own coat, sir?” Jean Marie examined it. “It is a very fine coat.”

  “Made in London with good fabric and cut,” Justin agreed. “But I won’t be able to wear it again without thinking of being shot and stabbed, so you’re welcome to it.”

  “Thank you, sir!” Jean Marie pulled it on. The material was a dark brown so the stains didn’t show too badly, and it would fit well when he got some meat on his bones.

  “Welcome to civilian life, Señor Paget,” Sofia said.

  He stroked the fine wool of his left sleeve. “I was conscripted into the army against my will. I will not miss it.”

  “I think you will like being a Gabrileño much more,” Sofia said. “For now, go down to the stables and help with the horses. After, ask where to find Señor Oliviera and tell him I said to put you to work and find you a room and meals.” She waved a hand tiredly. “For the next few days, life will be rather chaotic.”

  “Anything you wish of me, you have but to ask, Princess.” He bowed deeply, then left the room.

  As he did, a small furry gray shape darted inside the room. Sofia breathed out her tension in a long sigh as she scooped up the cat. “Querida Sombra!” she said as she rubbed her cheek against the soft, striped fur.

  “Someone else is your querido, my princess?” Justin’s rusty voice asked.

  Smiling, Sofia perched on the edge of the bed. “My watch cat has arrived. When I’m not here, he spends his time in the kitchen, where he works diligently on the mouse patrol, but he always knows when I’ve returned and he finds me.” She held the cat out and talked to him seriously. “Mi Sombra, stand guard over this man. Keep him company, offer comfort, and if he tries to get up, bite him!”

  She set the cat on the bed. Sombra promptly marched up to the pillow and began licking Justin’s chin. “Sombra thinks you need a shave,” Sofia said. “He’s right.”

  Justin laughed and began scratching Sombra’s head and neck. He was rewarded with a mattress-rattling purr. “I see I have a rival for your affections. Your bedmate, I presume?”

  “Indeed he is.” She took Justin’s hand. “I’ll stay here until the surgeon arrives. With an invasion on the way, I have much to do. I have a thought. Would you accept Jean Marie as a body servant? You’re going to need extra care for a few days.”

  Justin considered. “I like the idea. He seems inclined to please, and he knows a well-made coat when he sees one.”

  “He is also desperate to find a place where he belongs,” Sofia said softly. “If he is treated well, he will serve you all his days.”

  Justin squeezed her hand. “You have a gift for inspiring loyalty, my princess. As Athena said, you turned an enemy into an ally.”

  “Would that I could do that with the rest of the French!” She sighed. “I’m frightened, Justin. Terrified. Baudin returns with many soldiers at his back and a desire to claim San Gabriel and me. If he becomes entrenched here before Colonel da Silva returns, he will be hard to dislodge. There will be a war with many deaths.”

  “Don’t underestimate Will. He’s a fine officer, skilled at getting the most from his men.” Justin paused to catch his breath. “And your people are fighting for their homes. That gives them extra strength.”

  She hoped Justin was right. She prayed he was right.

  * * *

  “Justin? How are you feeling?”

  Will’s quiet voice drew Justin from his tangled dreams. He woke and blinked at the canopy over the bed. “I ache,” he said muzzily. “The blasted surgeon must have given me laudanum. I wish he hadn’t. Sofia probably insisted.”

  Will chuckled as he moved into Justin’s line of sight. “I have the same reaction to laudanum. It’s nice the pain is reduced, but the scrambled wits are a nuisance.”

  Justin glanced at the window. “How long have I been asleep?”

  “Only a couple of hours.” Will leaned against the heavy post at the foot of the bed, looking tired. “Just long enough to miss the storm of horror and shock that blazed through the castle when people learned of the imminent invasion.”

  Justin frowned, wishing he could think clearly. “How widespread is the news?”

  “Mostly just the royal household. We don’t want to risk the general population knowing too soon in case the news should somehow reach Baudin. Without the element of surprise, San Gabriel hasn’t much hope of staving off the invasion.” Will moved to the table by the bed and poured a glass of water. “You look thirsty.”

  Jus
tin downed the whole glass in one long swallow. “I was and didn’t quite realize it.” He held out the glass for a refill. “That cleared my wits a bit, as well as removing the laudanum aftertaste from my mouth. I assume that you and Sofia’s people have been working on more detailed plans?”

  “Yes, we’ll evacuate the farms near the Spanish road and move as many people as possible into the sanctuaries on Friday. Guards will be set on the road to Spain to prevent anyone from leaving the valley heading east, as well as to watch for Baudin.”

  Justin drank the second glass of water more slowly, then cautiously pushed himself up to sit against the pillows. His head didn’t seem bad except for a dull ache, and the knife wound was merely painful, not agonizing. “I’ll be ready to join your forces by Saturday night.”

  Will shook his head. “You’re not going to be part of the ambush.”

  Before Will could continue, Justin’s usually mild temper flared. “I’m a tolerably good shot, and I’ve had enough experience with war and bandit attacks that I’m unlikely to break and run. You’re going to need every steady soldier you can find, damn it!”

  “Yes, sorry, I know you’d be valuable,” Will said apologetically. “But I have a more important task that you’re best suited for.”

  “What is more valuable than fighting off the French?”

  “Getting Sofia out of San Gabriel and down to Porto,” Will retorted. “If we fail to stop the French from overrunning the valley, the first thing they’ll do is try to capture her and drag her to Baudin’s bed.”

  Justin gagged at the thought. “The castle is virtually impregnable.”

  “Yes, but if she’s besieged inside, Baudin can take his time securing the rest of the country, and he may set up an ambush of his own to attack Colonel da Silva and his men when they return. If you take Sofia to Porto, with your help she can rally British and Portuguese support if that becomes necessary. I assume you know high-ranking Portuguese officials. You can also send word to our influential British friends to drum up support for the gallant and beautiful princess in exile.” Will grimaced. “I hope it won’t come to that, but it’s best to be prepared.”

  Justin hesitated. “I see the value of helping her escape, but it feels like cowardice. You have even better connections with the British establishment, and you would be a bodyguard without equal to get her safely away.”

  “If the situation gets that desperate, I’ll be dead,” Will said tersely. “You’re the best hope for Sofia and San Gabriel. She won’t want to go for the same reasons you don’t want to go. She would die for her country. Your job is to persuade her to live for her country. Between you and Athena, you can convince her to leave if necessary.”

  “That would get Athena away to safety also,” Justin observed.

  “A thought that hasn’t escaped my attention,” Will agreed. “You’ll have noticed that Athena is also an effective bodyguard. Along with a couple of Gabrileños with combat experience, you’ll be able to travel fast and light.”

  “You’ve persuaded me.” Justin smiled wryly. “To be honest, dying nobly doesn’t really appeal to me that much.”

  Will laughed. “Once I thought it would be noble, but no longer. Yet ever since I joined the army, I’ve assumed I’d die fighting. If my time has come . . .” He shrugged. “At least it won’t be a surprise.”

  “A soldier’s life produces a rather shocking degree of fatalism,” Justin muttered, trying not to show how rattled he was by Will’s calm acceptance of likely death. “I think you’ll survive because you and your brother are both apparently unkillable.”

  Will grinned. “Would that were true.”

  Justin threw back his covers. “Pull out the chamber pot. I may need help not to keel over. Damned laudanum!”

  Will caught his arm as Justin slid from the bed. “I’ll tell Jean Marie to make sure no one gives you any more. He’s appointed himself your personal attendant. The only reason he’s not here is because I sent him off to find some food and assured him I wouldn’t let you die on my watch.”

  “I’m becoming fond of the lad,” Justin said, swaying a little. “I may keep him.”

  One of his laudanum dreams slid across his mind. An image of a petite woman who reminded him of Athena. He blinked and considered the image. “I’ve been thinking about friends back in England, and I may know who Athena’s father is. . . .”

  Chapter 28

  The day had been long and tiring and it might already be too late, but Athena couldn’t delay any longer. She might not have another chance. She undressed and donned her long night robe, then unpinned her hair and brushed it loose over her shoulders and back.

  Quietly she stepped from her room into the long corridor that led from one end of the floor to the other. The castle was silent, and enough moonlight entered the windows at both ends of the passage that she didn’t need a candlestick to light her way.

  Soft-footed as Sofia’s cat, she made her way to the far end of the corridor and tapped on Will’s door to alert him, since she was sure that startling an experienced soldier wasn’t a good idea. When she got no response, she tried the handle. The door opened easily and she stepped into the bedroom.

  A wide swath of moonlight splashed across the bed, limning Will’s bare, powerful torso with silver light. He lay on his side, one arm over a pillow and the lower part of his body covered by a blanket. “Will?”

  He came awake instantly. “Athena, what’s wrong?” He pushed himself up to a sitting position. As the blanket slid lower, it was obvious that he was quite gloriously naked. “It’s too quiet to be the French invasion come early.”

  Her lips twisted ruefully. “A different kind of invasion.”

  She stepped forward into the moonlight, wishing she had a tenth of her mother’s allure. “We could easily have been killed on the trail. It made me recognize how foolish my doubts and fears are. I discovered that I don’t want to die without . . . without sharing your bed.” Her voice faltered. “That is, if you still want me. I wouldn’t blame you if you’ve lost interest. . . .”

  “Want you?” His smile lit up the room as he extended his hand. “My dear girl, I can’t imagine a day when I won’t want you. Come to me.”

  Weak with relief, she stepped forward and clasped his hand with her shaking fingers. Unsure what he believed about her, she said uncertainly, “I’m not a virgin.”

  “Neither am I.” He pulled her down onto the bed and embraced her, his arms enfolding her with strength and tenderness. “Please tell me this isn’t a dream.” He buried his face in the loose waves of her hair, his warm breath teasing her throat. “No, if it is a dream, don’t tell me. I don’t want it to end.”

  She laughed a little, relaxing in his welcome. “This is real. You’re very real. I have trouble remembering why I resisted you so intensely when I wanted you so much.”

  “From what you’ve said about your childhood, your doubts were understandable.” He pulled back a little so he could study her face in the moonlight, his gaze probing. “Danger has a way of stripping away lesser concerns, but when danger has passed, it’s easy to regret actions taken when death seemed imminent. If you think you might have regrets later, now is the time to retreat.” His mouth twisted. “I don’t want you to go, but neither do I want you to have any regrets.”

  “The only regrets I’ll have is that I’ve waited so long,” she said honestly. “Don’t hold anything back, Will.”

  His brows arched. “Maybe you should clarify what you mean by that?”

  With difficulty, she said, “I told you that I would never want to bring an illegitimate child into the world, but I’ve realized that I want rather fiercely to have your baby.” Her smile was self-mocking. “In other words, I’m as selfish as my mother. Though I think what she craved was any child, and I want only yours. That’s unlikely when we have so little time, but I will rejoice if it happens.”

  He sucked his breath in. “That’s the greatest compliment I’ve ever received. If you’re su
re . . .”

  “I’m sure.” Growing impatient, she rolled forward and pressed her lips to his.

  He responded as if she was a spark and he was tinder. “Athena,” he breathed. “Goddess . . .”

  He kissed her more deeply, drawing her against him so that their bodies pressed together and his great, warm hands roamed over the curves and valleys of her back and sides. “So elegant and strong,” he murmured. When his exploring hand slid under a fold of her robe, his voice changed. “And you are most interestingly naked under your robe!”

  She ducked her head in embarrassment. “One of the alarming pieces of maternal wisdom Delilah gave me was that very few men can resist a naked female body. Perhaps that’s how she seduced my father, the dreadful duke. I’m sure this method was more reliable in her case, but I . . . I thought that if you were undecided, I could take off my robe. Just to make my humiliation complete if you still rejected me.”

  She could joke about it, since he hadn’t rejected her. She hadn’t even had to drop her robe.

  Will laughed. “There is truth in her words, but not the whole truth. Female nakedness is always interesting, but even more important is that the female be interesting. And you, little owl, are the most interesting woman I’ve ever met.”

  “I’m not a little anything!” she protested.

  “A long and lovely owl? True, perhaps, but not as good a pet name.” He gently pushed her onto her back and untied the sash of her robe. “You are a banquet, my lady,” he said, his voice thickening. “Strong and lithe and exquisitely female.”

  He caressed her bare body from shoulder to hip before returning to her breast. She gasped as he thumbed her nipple. It hardened instantly, sending jolts of sensation to deep, secret places.

  His hand moved to her other breast and he leaned in for a kiss that began with warm lips and sliding tongues, then moved. “A banquet of irresistible taste and texture,” he said huskily.