by Jessica Ames
9
Lucy
It’s two days before I see Nox again. I have no idea where he’s been, but the clubhouse has been a hive of activity and that worries me. I’ve asked multiple men what’s going on, but all I get in response is “club business”, which I’ve discovered means keep your fucking nose out.
I’ve been allowed out of my room and to the common room, but that’s as far as I can go. I tried to leave yesterday, intending to go to my place to grab some stuff, so I can hit the road, but Kyle, who wears a different vest to the other men, stopped me on the gate. He refused to let me out, so I guess I am a prisoner, despite Whizz saying I’m not.
The longer I’m here the more petrified I am of my secret coming out. It’s only a matter of time before the Sons discover Hank is clean and then all eyes will come to me. If they dig around too deeply, they’re going to realise my entire past is fabricated. The woman they know doesn’t exist. I have no idea what the Sons will do to me when that comes out, but I can’t be here when it does, nor do I want to see the look on Sasha’s face when she learns the truth.
Would they kill me for keeping secrets?
For endangering their club?
Will I be buried alongside my secrets? Honestly, I don’t think my relationship with Sasha will protect me. She’s likely to be just as mad at me anyway for lying all these years.
What I have learnt in the time I’ve been here is that the Untamed Sons are powerful, maybe as strong as Isaac, and that terrifies me, because one day, that power will all be directed at me.
I’ve been around men like this my entire life. I know the lengths they will go to in order to protect their empires, to keep the status quo in place. I’m not naïve like everyone thinks. I know I’m a threat to everything the Sons have built, because if Isaac finds out I’m here, nothing will stop him coming through that gate and dragging me out of here.
I need to formulate a plan to leave, but I don’t know how. I still don’t have transport—my car is being repaired by the club—and the gates, which are now fixed after I drove through them, are always manned.
I sag back on the bed, staring at the ceiling, my mind a flurry of activity. I’m fucked if I can’t get out of here.
A knock on the door brings my attention, and I sit up fast, cold pulsing through my body.
I swallow bile, clutching the comforter in my hands, trying to calm my racing heart as I stare at the door.
“Luce? You in there?”
Nox.
My heart rate slows. Nox makes me feel the most at ease out of all the brothers—and not just because we’ve kissed. His genial nature makes it easy to relax around him, even though I can see the darkness lingering in his eyes. Like all the brothers, he has demons, but his are mostly kept beneath the surface—unlike Ravage and Fury’s. Both men terrify me. I see the same dark in their gazes that I’ve seen in Isaac’s, and that makes my stomach fill with ice.
If they knew the truth…
I clamber off the bed and tug the door open. Nox is standing in the doorway, his forearms over his head, resting against the door jamb. He looks handsome, as always, with that slightly wild edge to him. My eyes trail to the Vice President patch on his leather vest and my stomach rolls. His loyalty will always be to his club first, not me.
He doesn’t give me chance to speak, stepping into my space and kicking the door shut behind him with a booted foot. Then like a lion stalking its prey, he moves towards me. I’m pressed against the wall, his hard body against mine and his fingers are tangling in the hair at the side of my head as he claims my mouth.
The kiss is hot, wet, frantic. There’s a definite edge of needy desperation as he takes what he wants. I should stop him, but I don’t. I’m not immune to his charms, and when he kisses me I can’t help but crash my lips against his.
I’ve never felt this kind of chemistry with another man. I thought I loved Isaac, but he never made butterflies beat frantically in my belly. He never made my mouth pull into a smile despite my fears, and he never made me feel safe. Nox does all of this without a word being spoken.
My thoughts scatter as he licks along the seam of my mouth, begging entry. I give into him, opening up and letting his tongue slide against mine. He tastes good, and I want to melt into him more.
Then he hoists me up and my legs instinctively wrap around his waist as I’m pressed harder into the plaster. My body contracts and pulses as needy desperation rolls through me. I want him, I can’t deny that, but the sensible part of my brain screams this is a bad idea.
I tune that out and continue to devour his mouth, my fingers moving over the layer of scruff covering his head. His aftershave fills my senses, a scent that is wholly masculine.
Lack of oxygen eventually forces me to pull back and take a breath. He does the same, panting heavily.
“You miss me?” he pants out, his eyes meeting mine and I warm under his heated eyes.
“Yes,” I breathe out, not even attempting to lie. I have missed him, which is petrifying. I’ve let myself get too close. I let him in and I shouldn’t have, but now I have, I don’t want to push him away. It feels amazing to have a man who wants me for me, not because I’m a prize to be won. I’m drunk on that feeling.
It’s not real, though.
Keeping Nox at a distance is probably for the best. It’ll make things easier when I come to leave. I don’t want to hurt him, though inevitably that will happen.
He walks me over to the bed and puts a knee to the mattress, taking me with him, then his hand goes between my legs, rubbing me through my borrowed joggers. I moan as my pussy jolts with electricity. When his fingers slip under the waistband and against the smooth skin of my belly, I’m lost to him.
Feeling wanted is something I haven’t had for a long time. Maybe even ever. Isaac wants me, but not in that way. He wants to own me, to control me. Nox wants to pleasure me.
I push his kutte off his shoulders, my movements jerky as I try to concentrate while his fingers push aside my underwear, slipping through my folds. I gasp as two move inside my pussy, my back arching off the bed. When his fingers continue to stroke me, I see stars as my climax hits embarrassingly fast and I come, calling his name.
He kisses me as my thighs tremble and when he pulls away, I peer into his face. Isaac’s smug grin flashes across my mind and I freeze, my veins turning to ice.
“Lucy?” Nox says my name softly, but there’s a hint of concern in his tone.
I blink up at him. It’s Nox, not Isaac. I don’t need to be afraid and I won’t let that bastard get inside my head.
“You okay?”
I nod. “Keep going.”
I watch dismayed as he leans forward to kiss my forehead then pushes off the bed. He picks up his kutte from where he dropped it, shrugging back into it.
“Ain’t never going to make you do shit you don’t want to.”
“I know that,” I say quietly, shame burning my cheeks.
“Ain’t that kind of man.”
“I know that too, but I wanted it.”
He climbs back on the bed and pulls me against him. I go into his arms willingly, just letting him hold me.
“Your words say that, but your body tells me something different. I don’t know what hurt you have in your past, sweetheart, but I’m never going to be the one who gives you hurt in your future, understand?”
If he knew the truth about me, knew who I really was, he might not share this sentiment. It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell him my whole sordid life, but I swallow down the words, instead blurting out, “I know.”
Because I can never tell Nox, or anyone, that Isaac Blackwood is my husband.
10
Nox
“Hey, Nox.”
I stop and turn at the sound of my name and see Sasha striding up the corridor towards me. She looks good. The strain she had when Sin was still alive is gone. The fear, the underlying feeling of being covered in the filth he left on her no longer exists. Her smile is easy,
radiant even. Killing that bastard was worth every second to get her back. She’s the old Sash now, the one I grew up with—though with scars.
“Rav know you’re at the clubhouse?” I demand as I move towards her. My tone is a little sharp and she rolls her eyes at me, like I’m being ridiculous. Maybe I am, but I feel a wave of protectiveness when it comes to her, although she’d kick me in the balls for thinking she needs taking care of.
“What do you think?”
“I think the last thing I need is my president losing his shit over his old lady being here without permission.”
Things are still hot with Lucy’s assassins, but so far, we haven’t turned up shit on Hank. If he’s dirty, he hid it well. So far, no one has come here looking for Lucy, so we’ve let down our guard a little, relaxed the reins, but we haven’t relaxed it enough for Sasha to be here.
“Ty would keep me locked up forever if he could—killer assassins on the loose or not. I want to see Lucy, check how she’s doing.”
While I love that she cares, her being here when things are so unsettled is dangerous, and I won’t let anything touch her—not again.
“Lucy’s fine,” I tell her. “Where’s Lily-May?”
The little girl is the spitting image of Sasha, but she definitely has her father’s temper. I’ve seen the tantrums she throws and they ain’t pretty. Even so, I want even a fraction of what they have. Family is important as fuck to me. I grew up with a big one—both blood and club. I want that for my kids, too. I’d love a daughter or a son to follow in my footsteps.
“Briella is looking after her.”
Briella is Levi’s little sister and is a total motormouth. Getting her to stop talking once she starts is impossible. She’s also barely nineteen and has a habit of getting into shit she usually needs the club to get her out of.
“Bree’s trouble.”
“She’s just young. We’ve all been there.” She dismisses my concerns. “I need to see my best friend.” There’s a pleading tone to her voice that begs me not to snitch on her. She knows I can’t do that. Rav is not just my friend, but my President, and my first loyalty is always to him. “She nearly died, Nox. I can’t leave her to deal with this shit alone. Lucy was there for me through everything.”
That’s something I’ve always loved about Sasha—her unfaltering loyalty. It’s why I never believed she cheated with Sin. It just never made sense to me. She wasn’t that kind of woman, never had been. Plus, the way she was with him just felt off, wrong. If they’d legit hooked up she would have been less volatile towards Sin.
She sighs and holds up the bag she’s carrying. “I stopped at the shop and bought her some clothes. They’re not perfect, but they’ll do until she can get her own shit.”
“She’ll appreciate that.” I like seeing her in my clothes, but Sasha’s right. She needs her own stuff.
Our conversation is cut off as Melody steps out of the common room in shorts that barely cover the globes of her arse and a shirt tied under her tits that exposes her midriff. On her feet are bright red high heels that make her long legs look even longer, shapelier. She’s a beautiful woman on the outside. Too bad she’s a rotten bitch on the inside.
She smiles at me, but that smile fades when she sees Sasha and I don’t like that it does. Sasha’s family. Melody is here by invitation.
I watch as her nose wrinkles, as if she’s smelt something unpleasant, but when Melody turns back to me, she’s all smiles again. Fucking cunt.
I know her type. I’ve seen them time and time again coming through the clubhouse doors. Bitches who want just one thing. To bag themselves a patched brother. Becoming an old lady is the ultimate goal of all club bunnies, but Melody’s desperation is always so obvious. She thinks she has Titch and Whizz wrapped around her little finger, but I know both brothers would drop her like a ten-tonne anvil if Rav told her she was gone tomorrow. I don’t like her much, which is why I haven’t parked my dick anywhere near her for the past six months. I don’t do crazy.
“Nox, are you busy?” Her voice is pitched high, annoyingly so, and she curls a strand of red hair around her finger as she glances at me beneath her fake eyelashes. The coy thing might work on the others, but I’m not so easily swayed by snatch.
Sasha scoffs, folding her arms over her chest as she glares at the woman, which has Melody snapping her gaze towards her. There’s no love lost between them ever since Melody tried to get her claws into Rav. She’s lucky Sash didn’t scalp her that day.
Melody meets her gaze and bites out a nasty, “What?” at Sasha, who either doesn’t notice it, or doesn’t care. Probably the latter. Sasha is a ballsy bitch, and her tongue can be fierce at times.
“The desperation is really pathetic, sweetheart,” Sash tells her, her lips curving into a smirk.
Before shit can erupt, I step in, moving between the two women. Not that I think Melody would go off on Sash. She’s not that fucking stupid. Touching an old lady is a fast track to out of here, but if there’s one thing I’ve learnt over the years, it’s that bunnies can be unpredictable as fuck.
“Time to get gone,” I tell Melody, who scowls at Sasha before giving me a radiant smile. She knows better than to argue with a patch, especially an officer. I could have her out of here in seconds.
Melody’s smile is thin as she realises I’m not going to take her corner. She flicks her hair over her shoulder, then sashays up the corridor, glancing back to give me a beaming grin. I ignore her, turning my attention back to Sasha.
“I hate that bitch,” she mutters, watching Melody turn the corner and disappear. “She’s a parasite.”
She is, but I’m not interested in Melody or any of the shit that spews out of her mouth.
I bring the conversation back to what we were talking about before. “So, Rav has no idea you’re here.”
“Of course not,” Sasha waves a hand at me. “He’d never let me come to the clubhouse, not with all this shit going on.”
And that is a good decision. Lucy’s attackers haven’t come here yet, but that’s not to say they won’t. She’s on their radar now and we have to be careful. Sasha being here is an unnecessary risk.
“You know I have to tell him, right? And you know he’s going to be pissed you ignored his orders.”
“I don’t take orders from Ty or anyone, Nox, so you do what you have to do. I’m going to find Lucy.”
I watch her stride into the common room and fire off a message to Rav, telling him Sash is here. A reply comes back a few seconds later with three words—“For fuck’s sake”.
Yeah, he’s pissed.
I don’t blame him. We all feel a little protective towards Sasha these days. She’s been through so much, and not just with Sin, but with getting Lily-May well again. The transplant from Fury was a success, but that doesn’t stop us worrying about that little girl, or the toll her being sick took on Sasha.
But Sash is good for Rav, even though she pushes his boundaries. She keeps him on his toes and she doesn’t roll over and give him his way all the time. I’ve never seen my best friend as settled as he has been since Sasha came back. The demons that always lingered on the edge of being unleashed are buried deeper, even though he gained new ones from what he had to do to his brother. Those scars will take longer to heal, but Sasha keeps Rav level, something I’ve never been able to do.
I pocket my phone, then step into the common room.
Daimon is sitting in the corner, a cigarette between his lips, flipping through a newspaper. As Treasurer, he likes to keep an eye on the business market in Kessington, see who is up and coming, see who we need to clamp down on, who we can use to gain a profit. Every day he sits and reads the papers from cover to cover, seeing who we can move in on.
He gives me a lift of his chin as I enter before he disappears behind a cloud of smoke.
The only other person in the room is Kyle. The prospect is stocking the bar, cleaning the sides down and keeping himself busy. I like the kid, but we’re all a litt
le leery after what went down with Zack. Trust is a precious commodity and when it’s broken, it’s nearly impossible to fix.
My eyes move to the other side of the room and stop on Lucy. She is sitting at the table I’ve come to think of as hers because she’s always there, and she’s hugging Sasha as if she’s her lifeline. Seeing that, I can’t be pissed that Sasha risked herself coming here. Lucy needs this. She needs to know she hasn’t been forgotten, that people still give a shit about her.
They start talking excitedly, and I hang back in the doorway, watching them catch up, my mouth pulling into a grin. I’m glad Lucy has this, a friend willing to go to the edge for her. I get the impression from listening to Sasha talk about her that she’d done the same for her and Lily.
The door opens behind me and I twist to see Rav, who is huffing like a raging bull. I put a hand to his chest, stopping him from stepping further in.
“She’s okay, Rav.”
“She shouldn’t fucking be here.”
No, she shouldn’t, but Sasha came for her friend and I respect the hell out of her for doing that.
“Ain’t nothing going to happen to her while we’re here.”
He calms slightly at this realisation, tearing his tie out of his hair, so he can rake his fingers through it.
“Have a beer with me,” I say, hoping to calm him down.
He’s reluctant. I can see the urge to get Sasha out of here playing across his face, but I nudge him towards the bar and he starts to move.
As I slide onto the bar stool, Rav doing the same, Kyle grabs us two bottles of beer, placing them in front of us before moving away.
“We need to get a couple more prospects in here,” Rav mutters, taking a long pull on his drink.
We do. Zack’s murder left us with a hole in our ranks. The kid was close to patching too, which means we’re going to be short a patched member for another twelve months at least.
“Take it to the table,” I say, “see if one of the brothers have anyone in mind.”