So Then There Were None

by Annie Adams

It never came.

  I suddenly felt light and airy and a flutter passed through my chest. Our eyes were locked into each other. It felt like I was on fire inside. I was ready without any of the hesitation I’d felt when he first proposed. I opened my mouth to say “Let’s do it,” but he put a finger to my lips.

  His eyes were so warm and loving. It felt like I could just dive in and stay forever. There was no one else in the room at the moment. Were we even in a room? It felt like we were suspended in air, in the middle of a cloud or something. I had to tell him, I love you so much. Let’s get married, right now.

  He gently pressed his finger down, reminding me it was still there. “Before you say anything, remember who your mother is. And then, remember mine. They would kill us both if we eloped.”

  The cloud and the magical mist and anything else that felt warm and cozy disappeared. We were still sitting on a couch in the middle of lunch with a bunch of strangers. The weight of the truth of what he’d just said changed that stomach flutter to a stomach full of heavy rocks. I wrinkled my nose and sighed, then looked down at the list of 1920’s lingo.

  “And how.”

  Chapter Three

  I sat on the floor in a large suite, while Megan sat behind me on a window seat, styling my hair. I’d learned that all the bridesmaids were hosting a mini bachelorette party when I arrived at the room. Apparently it was mostly for my benefit, since I wasn’t able to attend the “real” one they’d had the week before. After hearing about the first party with the never ending bottles of wine, naughty gifts and the male dancers who’d arrived dressed as cops, I felt a sense of relief when the only party favors they brought out were fancifully decorated cookies, sparkling water and portable mani/pedi kits.

  Megan gave me a hand mirror and pulled me up from the floor so we could go look in the bathroom mirror. “What do you think?” she asked.

  “This is gorgeous!” In the reflection of the hand mirror I could see the back of my head. Megan had pinned and curled my long hair underneath itself so that I had a wavy, shoulder-length bob. She’d sculpted the bangs into gentle finger waves and then placed a gold headband of three strands of metal filigree on top of my head.

  “Oh, Quincy!” Pam had followed us to the bathroom. “You’re going to look like a goddess in your dress.”

  “Really? I haven’t seen it yet.”

  We shuffled out into the main seating area.

  “You haven’t seen your bridesmaid dress?” Megan said.

  “No, we did everything online. I sent my measurements to Christie by email and she said my dress would be waiting for me. I haven’t even been to my room yet. I hope it’s there.”

  “There’s no way I would wear a dress like that in public without trying it on first,” Jill said.

  Kourtnee came over and sat down. “I haven’t tried mine on either. What do I care how it looks? I hate wearing a dress period. I’m only doing it for Christie.”

  Jill didn’t make any attempt to stifle her obvious annoyance with Kourtnee.

  “Where’s your friend?” asked one of the girls—Eva maybe?

  “You mean, K.C.?” I said.

  She nodded.

  “She came and borrowed a comb,” Megan said. “She said she wanted to do her hair for the party tonight.”

  “Oh good,” said the blonde bombshell friend. Candee—maybe? “That means she’s staying. She’s so funny.”

  That’s the great thing about K.C. She’s the life of the party wherever she goes.

  “Too bad she’s missing the bachelorette party,” Candee said.

  “Some party,” Regan snarked. “Because of Jill we can’t have any more champagne, and all there is to eat are these little cookies.” She shoved a chocolate-dipped coconut macaroon into her mouth.

  “Those bridesmaid gowns are very unforgiving,” Megan said matter-of-factly. “Are you sure you want to exacerbate the situation even more, dear sister?” She pointed the tip of her parting comb in the direction of Regan’s thighs.

  Regan gave her a searing look. “You’re one to talk. Dan saw you naked one time and that’s all it took.”

  I looked over at Pam and felt my mouth drying out as it hung open. I couldn’t help but wonder if we would be breaking up a fist-fight. She leaned over and said, “Don’t worry, that’s just how they talk to each other. They’re fine.”

  “Oh.” I nodded and tried to pretend it wasn’t disturbing.

  “Speaking of naked bodies,” Jill pulled out a silver flask and poured some liquid into her sparkling water flute, “where are the men? I’ve got some dollar bills burning a hole in these yoga pants. I wanna’ see some flesh,” she said loud enough for the whole lodge to hear.

  “I’ve got you covered, girl, don’t you worry,” a voice said from the hallway.

  I tried to make my search for an alternative exit as inconspicuous as possible.

  “What is it I agreed to do?” a very recognizable voice said from the hall.

  “Woo! Now we’re talking,” Jill said as Alex appeared in the doorway.

  “What’s going on in here?” Alex asked innocently.

  “Nothing, until you got here,” Candee said.

  Stripper music began to play from somewhere. Don’t ask me how I knew it was stripper music. Somehow, it’s just one of things you know as soon as you hear it.

  “Take it off,” Regan shouted.

  “Take it all off,” Jill said.

  His face turned a shade of crimson, but he still wore a grin a mile wide. “I think there’s been some kind of a misunderstanding.”

  “How cute. Is the innocent, naïve thing part of your routine?” Audra said.

  “Look, Christie,” Regan said, “This is your last day of freedom, better take advantage of the moment.”

  Alex’s eyes scanned the room, a look of fear passing over his face, until he saw me.

  “Uh, Quincy, could I talk to you about something? Outside?”

  “Absolutely.” I practically ran out of there.

  “What room from hell is this?” he asked.

  “It’s the bridal suite. We’re having a bachelorette party,” I said in a voice that ensured he knew how much I didn’t miss it. “Apparently you were supposed to be the entertainment.”

  “I was talking to that guy, Monte in the hallway, when the golfer chick came by and asked what we were doing. Monte disappeared. Anyway, I told her I was on the way to change my clothes and she asked me to come with her to do a favor.”

  “Quite a favor you were willing to do,” I said.

  “Who said anything about willing?”

  I looked at him doubtfully. “When are you ever unwilling to do a favor? Especially one for a pretty girl?”

  “Okay, so I didn’t say no. But that was because I didn’t know what she wanted me to do. She just said she needed my help in a room down the hall.”

  I shook my head at his uncharacteristic naiveté. And instead of making a sarcastic joke by pointing out the obvious innuendo, I decided to let that topic be. We had a short time to stay here and I didn’t want to waste it by arguing.

  “You’ve been the unlucky innocent bystander a lot on this trip. How’s your gargoyle injury?”

  “You can’t even see it. It really looked much worse than it was. And besides, how many people even get to say they have a gargoyle injury?”

  I laughed. “You’re a member of an exclusive club now. Such a weird thing to happen, though. It’s not like this building is ancient. I think it’s me jinxing things for you. Whenever I’m around, stuff seems to go wrong.”

  His mouth wrinkled into a frown. “Everything is right when you’re around me. Hey, your hair looks nice.” He pulled me toward him so we were facing each other. “What do you say we go mess it up?” He bounced his eyebrows up and down suggestively.

  I felt my face flush and my auto-grin kicked in. It did that whenever he was irresistibly charming.

  “I need your help in a room down the hall.” He brushed his hands up
the outsides of my arms, then leaned in.

  As I lifted my chin to kiss him, I could swear a cold breeze blew past, causing me to shiver.

  “Did you feel that?” I asked.

  “You mean the shivering? I have that effect on women.” The left side of his mouth hitched up in a grin just before he kissed me.

  “Get out!”

  I jerked my head over my shoulder to see who had whispered in my ear.

  “What is it?” Alex asked.

  “Didn’t you hear that?” I said.

  “What are you talking about?”

  I looked from side to side and behind where Alex stood.

  “I could swear someone just whispered in my ear.”

  “You mean like this?” Alex cupped his hands next to my ear and whispered, “Q, come to bed with me.”

  His breath tickled my ear and gave me a different kind of shivers. “No, she said—”

  “Now it’s a she?”

  “This isn’t funny.”

  “You’re right,” he said. “We’re wasting precious time.” He scooped me up and carried me down the hall. “All this talking instead of undressing is not a laughing matter.” He jogged us toward our room.

  Chapter Four

  “Just a little higher,” I said.

  Alex moved his hand a fraction of an inch. “Here?”

  “Ahh, that’s the perfect spot.”

  “What in the holy heck are you two doing out here in public?” K.C.’s voice echoed down the hall.

  “What does it look like we’re doing?” Alex asked while still facing the wall.

  His voice had a bit of an edge to it, due to the fact we still weren’t in our room doing what he had planned when he dashed me down the hall in his arms.

  Unfortunately, as we had joyfully rounded the corner, my foot caught the edge of a silk flower arrangement. I hadn’t even felt it.

  Neither of us saw the carnage left behind, we just heard the crash and then looked back. Luckily nothing shattered, except maybe Alex’s plan for adventurous bedroom escapades. What little time we would have had for his plans was spent rearranging an entire wall display after figuring out how to re-hang the shelf.

  “It’s certainly not what I thought it would be from what I overheard,” K.C. said.

  I tugged at Alex’s sleeve, having caught the full view of the “change of clothes” K.C. had spoken of earlier.

  Alex made a startled gasping noise. “I—wow, is that a—”

  “Flapper costume?” I interrupted, before he made an innocent, but possibly painful slip of the tongue.

  “It sure is. I’ve been trying to tell someone this whole time that I brought this costume for my change of clothes because I knew the theme.”

  She sparkled from head to toe in ruby red beads and crystals. Her large bosoms were partially covered in a gravity defying, bustier-topped dress, with a dropped waist and a skirt made from fabric strips and strands of beads. Her hair had been sculpted into perfect rolling waves, encircled by a red, sequined head band accented with a rosette made with a crescent of feathers and sparkly jewels.

  “Wow,” Alex said.

  I turned and gave him a look. He seemed at a loss for anything to say.

  “I like your hair,” he finally managed.

  “When did you have time to do those waves? It takes hours, doesn’t it?” I asked.

  “I’ll let you two in on a little secret. And mum’s the word or else it’s curtains, see?”

  We agreed and she continued.

  “It’s a wig.” This was no secret. She had wigs in every style and color imaginable. “I have several, but this one is my flapper girl. What do you think?” She patted the bottom of her dark golden bob.

  “It’s spectacular,” I said. And I meant it in every possible way.

  “Well, you two had better get ready, the rehearsal’s going to start in less than an hour.”

  “Where did you get ready? Did you get your own room?” I asked.

  “Oh, no. Pam let me change in her room while you gals were at the bachelorette party. I’m sorry I missed the entertainment. I had a few dollars to tuck under a belt,” she opened the clip on an ornately jeweled coin purse and pulled out some green bills, “but I missed the boat. How was it? Any hot bodies I’ll regret missing?”

  A sickly groan came from over my shoulder.

  “He was very handsome.”

  “Really?” she said wistfully.

  “And what a body.” Alex gave my shoulders a squeeze and then cleared his throat.

  “Damn. Sounds like I missed a good one.”

  “You did. Too bad you can’t tell him yourself,” I said as I looked over my shoulder and winked.

  There was no mistaking the look that he gave me. I wouldn’t push my luck by revealing his secret.

  The three of us went to our room. K.C. wanted to leave her things there until after the party.

  “Oh, look. It’s your dress,” she said.

  Buttery satin flowed into a dropped waist that continued on to a three-quarter length skirt. The front was delicately embroidered in an ornate pattern with metallic gold thread. With a bridesmaid’s dress this intricate, I could only imagine what the bride’s dress looked like.

  "Isn't that lovely?" K.C. said. She rushed over to the dress, which hung on the door to the closet. "I'd be afraid to eat anything in this dress, Boss."

  "You’re right, I'm afraid to move in that dress." Given my knack for little accidents, it wasn't too far-fetched to think I might find an easy way to ruin it. "Oh well, I needed to lose a few pounds anyway," I joked.

  "No you don't," Alex said. "You're perfect just as you are."

  "Aww." K.C. pretended to wipe a tear from her eye. "I'm touched, I really am touched by your admiration for each other."

  Alex blushed. "I need to get dressed. Mind if I use the bathroom first?"

  "Oh don't mind me. I won't get in the way. Go ahead and do what you would do if I weren't here. A lot of people just change their clothes right in the middle of their room." She looked at me and winked.

  "Very funny. Should I be flattered or scared?" he said.

  "You never know, darling. Probably a little of both," K.C. said as she wiggled her tented fingertips like an evil genius.

  I knew she was kidding. I think.

  Alex grabbed his suit and dashed into the bathroom.

  I pulled the dress down from where it hung. "This fabric is so silky. What's-her-name wasn't kidding when she said it would show every flaw. I'm afraid every single freckle will jut out of this fabric."

  "Don't be silly, Boss. You're going to knock 'em dead in that dress. It was practically made for someone with your slim figure. If you had any bosoms to speak of it would look awkward, really."

  Aside from the fact that K.C. has a knack for stating the obvious with no reservation, she was right, I didn't have bosoms to speak of. At least, no one I knew ever spoke of them, probably because they weren't that easy to detect with the naked human eye.

  I turned the dress over to look at how it fastened, and when I turned it back around, I noticed three ugly yellow stains right in the spot which would rest upon one of my non-descript bosoms. They looked like cigarette burns.

  "Oh no! How did I do this? I’ve hardly even breathed on this dress and I've already stained it.”

  “Lemmee see.”

  I handed it over to K.C.

  "Looks like cigarette burns. The way it hung on the door, the fabric must've been folded over. They're plenty obvious now. Those are right in front."

  "What am I going to do? I don't even know these people, and half of them probably don’t like me that much. Should I find Christie?" I grabbed a tissue a tried to dab at the stain, hoping it wasn't what we thought it was.

  "No use doing that, those are definitely burn marks," K.C. said.

  I looked at her, hoping that my desperation would somehow force a miracle solution to magically appear. "What am I going to do?”

  “I don’t know
, but time’s ticking. Just put it on and we’ll figure something out.”

  I stepped behind the closet door and changed into the lacey undergarments that came with the dress, then carefully slid into the dress itself. I was inspecting the burn marks in the mirror as Alex came out of the bathroom.

  Dapper was one word that came to mind. Along with handsome, heart-stopping, and others. The light wheat color of his suit, with high lapels and flap pockets reminded me of Robert Redford in The Natural. He hadn’t yet buttoned the matching vest on top of a cream colored shirt with gold pin stripes. The gold bowtie dangled untied on either side of his white collar.

  “Hubba, hubba!” K.C. said.

  “Wow,” Alex said as he looked at me.

  K.C. clasped her gloved hands together, “Aren’t you two adorable?”

  He opened one of the two large boxes which sat upon the dresser and pulled out a pair of oxford shoes in brown and white. He wrinkled his nose. “What’s this?” He pulled a jewelry box topped with a glittery bow from the larger container.

  “What’s the matter?” I asked.

  “Nothing—I guess. Is it weird to get jewelry as a gift from another man?”

  “Oh, it’s never weird to receive jewelry from anyone,” K.C. said. “What is it?”

  He flipped open the lid to reveal a pair of mother of pearl cufflinks.

  “Those are gorgeous!” I said.

  “This is all a bit too much, isn’t it?” Alex said.

  “You’re asking the wrong bridesmaid, I still don’t know why I’m here.”

  “Well, how about we quit looking this gift horse in the mouth and get down to the rehearsal?” K.C. said.

  I looked in the mirror one more time. “I can’t go like this.”

  “What’s wrong with this? You look fantastic,” Alex said.

  “Aww, you two again. I’m gonna lose my lunch. You can’t tell me you didn’t notice those cigarette burns over her mini-mound.”

  “Real nice, K.C.”

  “I didn’t notice,” he said.

  “Oh, come on, you’re a heterosexual male, of course you noticed,” K.C. said.

  “I didn’t notice the dress. It’s not the outer layer I’m thinking about.”