“How so?”
His eyes lifted to mine, and he smiled sadly. Then he rose and walked to the bookshelf. As he came back to the table, I recognized the book he was carrying.
“That’s not the finance book I gave you, is it?”
“It is.”
Laughing, I took the book from him and shook my head. “You were so upset that day.”
“True, but reading this book later is what allowed me to make the choices I needed to make in order to move forward with my life.”
“What kind of choices?”
“Selling the property to pay off everything and have enough left over to go to school and buy Abuela a house.”
“And you bought this house too?”
He shrugged. “That was after I got the job.”
“You’re amazing.”
He winked at me. “You’re pretty amazing too.”
We sat in silence for a minute, staring at each other with lovesick expressions. Finally, Seth spoke. “I’d move back to the island for you, but knowing that someone else owns my family’s property . . .” He shook his head. “That part would be tough.”
I reached across the table and squeezed his hand. “I’ll think about opening a second bakery up here.”
“You will?”
I nodded, surprising myself. I’d never considered opening a second bakery. I had enough to do with just the one. Could I run two bakeries?
Seth pushed out a slow breath. “I’ll think about coming back to the island as well. We still own the little house on Chinaberry Street. We’re renting it out right now, but the renters are supposed to move out in a few months when their new house is ready.”
I smiled, appreciating his openness to moving back. I hadn’t considered that doing so would be painful for him. “We don’t have to rush into any decisions right now. We can just enjoy this time getting to know each other again. The drive is miserable, but we can always talk on the phone.”
“True.”
He let go of my hand, and we resumed our meal, eating in silence. Being with Seth was complicated. There were so many factors. We hadn’t even talked about our biggest obstacle, kids. Did Seth still want a big family?
“You okay?” Seth asked, glancing at me.
His gaze pulled me in. I wasn’t okay. I’d fallen in love with a man who was totally wrong for me, yet I couldn’t stay away.
“I’m fine. The steak is delicious.”
“It is, isn’t it?”
I smiled. We really didn’t need to decide on everything right now. We were still young and had plenty of time to figure things out. We loved each other. For now, that was enough.
Chapter 18
Seth
After three weeks of dating Vicki long distance, we decided to tell everyone about our relationship. Vicki thought Sunday morning during her family’s weekly brunch would be the perfect time and place.
I had to work the night before, but fortunately, things were slow, so I was able to get a few hours of sleep before my shift ended. Because King was already at the dog sitter’s, my plan was to leave straight from the fire station. Unfortunately, I forgot Vicki’s favorite sweater she left at my place last weekend, so I ran home to grab it.
As I was racing out the front door, Scarlet came up the walk. “Hey,” I said, confused to see her.
There were bags under her eyes, and it looked like she’d been crying. “Do you have time to talk?”
I didn’t, but maybe I could quickly deal with whatever she needed before getting on the road. “What’s going on?” I asked, trying not to sound rushed.
The tightness around her mouth told me this conversation wasn’t going to end well. She didn’t want to get back together, did she? No, she was probably being deployed again or worried about her dad’s heart condition. For a moment, I thought about inviting her inside, but I didn’t want to encourage her to stay longer than necessary.
Wrapping her arms around herself, she took a deep breath. “I have something to tell you that’s going to be hard to hear, so I’m just going to come out and say it.”
“Okay.” I braced myself for what she was about to say, but nothing could’ve prepared me for her news. Nothing.
“I’m pregnant,” she said.
“Pregnant?”
“Yes.” Her gaze didn’t falter as it met mine. Then, she exhaled slowly. “I know neither one of us wanted this, but I’m having a baby. I didn’t come here with any agenda other than to tell you that. I just thought you should know.”
I nodded, even though I didn’t understand. Not really. Was there a reason she was telling me this? We weren’t together anymore. She didn’t think the baby was mine, did she?
“Seth, say something.”
Instead of taking the time to choose my words carefully, I blurted out, “Are you saying it’s mine?”
Tears filled her eyes, making me feel like a jerk. Still, it was a valid question, wasn’t it?
She smoothed down her jeans. “I’m positive it’s yours. I haven’t been with anyone else like that. If you want to get a paternity test, you can, but I promise you, the baby is yours.”
I shoved a hand through my hair. I knew Scarlet was telling the truth. She had her faults, but lying was not one of them. If she said the baby was mine, I believed her.
“Trust me, Seth, I’m just as shocked and bewildered as you are. A baby is the last thing I wanted. I thought about not having it, but my doctor did a sonogram and . . . I saw him.”
Her voice cracked. “I saw the baby. He’s this tiny, real human being with a heartbeat and a brain and little hands and everything.” Her eyes filled with tears.
“Here,” I said, holding open the door. “Why don’t you come inside? Can I get you anything to drink? Water or juice?”
“Juice would be nice.”
We headed into the kitchen, my pulse pounding. Scarlet was pregnant with my kid. How was Vicki going to feel about that?
My hand shook as I poured a glass of orange juice for Scarlet. We sat at the kitchen table, and I exhaled slowly. “So, you already went to the doctor? Is everything okay?”
She took a sip of the juice and nodded. “Yes. Let me show you the photo.” Setting her glass down, she dug through her purse and pulled out a sonogram photo. As she handed it to me and I looked down at the 3D image, something inside me shifted. This was my kid I was looking at.
Overcome with a barrage of emotions, I stared at the image and swallowed hard. The first time I ever saw a sonogram image like this I’d been seven. This is your little brother, my mom said. This is Robbie.
“If you want to be involved in the baby’s life, you can.” Scarlet’s words interrupted my memory. “You don’t have to. I can raise him on my own. It’s up to you, but like we talked about before, all kids need a dad.”
I sat back in the chair, still in a massive state of shock. “You keep saying him. Do you know for sure it’s a boy?”
For the first time since arriving, she smiled. “Yes, it’s a boy.”
I sucked in a ragged breath as a tear slid down my face. Wiping it away, I tried to get ahold of my emotions.
“Oh, Seth.” Scarlet covered her mouth with her hand. “I didn’t mean for this to happen.”
I nodded, embarrassed by my tears. Scarlet thought I was crying because I was upset about the baby. That wasn’t it at all.
No, I was crying because my parents and brother would never know this child. My son, my beautiful baby son, who was barely the size of a peanut, would never know my family.
“Are you okay?” Scarlet asked, sitting very still, her eyes on me. “What are you thinking?”
I glanced back down at the photo. “It’s overwhelming.”
“I know. I’m really scared.”
Not sure what to say, I offered a sad smile as I handed back the picture. She shook her head. “You can keep that. They made two copies.”
“Okay. Thanks.”
“Like I said, you don’t have to be involved. I�
��” Sniffing hard, she swiped at the tears flowing down her face. Then, she gave in to them and sobbed into her hands.
“Hey.” I patted her back. “Don’t cry, okay? We’ll figure this out. I promise.”
“I’m scared. It’s not like I have a mom or sisters or any friends with kids to show me what to do. How am I going to know how to take care of a baby? And what if I get really bad postpartum depression like my mom?”
Scarlet didn’t know all the details, but according to her dad, her mother’s postpartum depression was so severe it had destroyed her marriage as well as her desire to be a mother. For that reason, Scarlet had been raised by her father and had spoken to her mother only a few times.
Pushing out a slow breath, I rested a hand on Scarlet’s shoulders. “Things are different now. Doctors have a better understanding of depression than they did in the past. So if you need help after the baby comes, we’ll get you help.”
She nodded, but I could tell she was still scared.
“Look, Scarlet. You’re not alone in this. I’m just as responsible as you for making this baby. I’m going to be there for both of you. I promise.”
“You are?”
I nodded, relieved to see the smile on her lips. She had a pretty smile, not as pretty as Vicki’s, but . . . I wouldn’t think about Vicki right now. I couldn’t think about Vicki right now.
No, right now I needed to do the right thing by my kid. I needed to take some time and figure out a plan with Scarlet.
Then, I needed to go to the liquor store and buy the best bottle of whiskey to celebrate. Scarlet couldn’t drink, but I certainly intended to commemorate this news with a drink.
A baby.
I was going to be some kid’s father. The thought both terrified and excited me.
Chapter 19
Vicki
Sitting in my car after church, I checked my messages, saddened to see that Seth wasn’t going to make it to brunch. In fact, most likely, he wouldn’t be coming to the island today.
“I’m so sorry,” he texted. “I was really looking forward to it, but something came up. I’ll call and explain as soon as I can.”
My heart sank. Today was the day we were going to tell my family about us. Our plan was for him to be at the family ranch when we got home from church. What a disappointment.
“Everything okay?” I texted.
I waited a few minutes for him to respond. When he didn’t, I tossed my phone into my purse and headed up to my family’s ranch.
*
That evening, while I was sitting on the couch in my living room, enjoying a cup of tea and a good book, Seth knocked on my door. I hadn’t been expecting him, and right away, I could tell something was wrong.
I ushered him inside and closed the door. “What is it?”
He shook his head and pulled me against him. For a long time, we stood there, holding each other. Finally, he released me.
“Is it work?” I asked. “Did you have a bad call?”
“No. Nothing like that.” He shoved his hand through his hair. “Can we sit down?”
I nodded, and we walked over to the couch. Once we were seated, I asked if he wanted something to eat or drink.
“No, not right now. I just want to tell you what I have to tell you.”
“Okay, go ahead.” My hands shook as I placed them in my lap and laced my fingers together. Whatever he needed to tell me was going to be okay.
“I didn’t come to brunch today because Scarlet came to see me just as I was leaving.”
Every hair on the back of my neck prickled. Keeping my voice calm, I simply said, “Oh?”
“Yeah.” He pushed out a slow breath and met my gaze. “Vicki, I’m so sorry.”
My blood turned cold. “What are you sorry about?”
“She’s pregnant. With my kid. It happened before you and I got together.”
I sat back, trying to wrap my head around what he was saying. “She’s pregnant?”
“Yeah. I’m so sorry. We were careless and stupid, and now she’s pregnant.”
Seth’s words felt like someone had taken a bat to my stomach. My mind raced with a thousand questions. “What are you going to do about it? I mean . . . where does that leave us? What happens now?”
“I don’t want this to affect our relationship, but I know it changes things. I still love you and want to be with you. I also want to be there for my son. I want him to grow up knowing me.”
“Of course. I understand that.”
“You do?”
My throat clogged, and I swallowed hard. “You’re going to be an amazing dad, Seth.”
“Thanks for that.”
I scooted close to him and just let him hold me. He wrapped his arms around me, making me feel warm and safe. Seth was going to be a father, something he always wanted. Without a doubt, this was going to change everything.
*
Two weeks later, I sat at the dining room table of my family’s ranch. Glancing at my phone, I hoped to see a text message from Seth. He should’ve been here by now. I knew he wouldn’t make it in time for church, but I was disappointed he’d missed brunch as well. If he didn’t show up soon, everyone would be gone by the time he arrived, and once again, we wouldn’t be able to make our big announcement.
Looking at my phone, I made another quick calculation. He’d texted this morning to say he was on his way. So, where was he? Had he gotten stuck in traffic? Had there been an accident? Had he changed his mind?
“Who are you texting?” Bianca asked, leaning toward me.
I quickly shut off my phone and stuck it in my pocket. After shooting Bianca a mind-your-own-business look, I turned my attention to Jillian, who was talking about her latest phone call with Keith. “He thinks they’ll be home on schedule in about two months.”
“That’s fantastic.” My mother buttered another one of the buttermilk biscuits I’d brought to go with my dad’s fried chicken. Buttermilk biscuits and fried chicken were two of Seth’s favorite foods.
Again, I snuck a peek at my phone. Still nothing. When the doorbell rang, I let out an audible sigh. He was here. Seth was finally here.
“Who’s that?” My mother pushed away from the table. “I didn’t hear the dogs bark, so it must be someone we know. Walter? Are you expecting anybody?”
My father shook his head. “I left the dogs in the barn because Lady’s hip is hurting and—”
“I’ll get the door,” I shouted before anyone could stop me.
As I raced through the house, my heart felt like it might explode. In a few minutes, my family would learn that Seth and I were together. Hopefully, they’d be happy for us. And hopefully, they’d understand that even though Seth was having a baby with another woman, he loved me.
The only person I thought might have a hard time with our relationship was Marcus. Marcus and Seth had once been so close, and I worried that my brother might feel betrayed by Seth’s secrecy. Then again, Marcus was halfway around the world. By the time he came back home, he’d have more than enough time to process everything.
Tingling with anticipation, I threw open the door, shocked to find not Seth but two formally dressed army soldiers standing on the front porch. Not understanding, I glanced over their shoulders, looking for Seth.
“Ms. Morgan?” The shorter soldier spoke with a stiffness that seemed wrong. My heart began to pound out a slow, steady, ominous rhythm.
Behind me, Travis spoke in his darling little boy voice. “It’s two army men, Mom.”
Anna picked up Travis and propped him on her hip even though he was almost too big for that. He didn’t protest, however, as everyone else crowded around the door.
Her eyes wide, Jillian placed a hand on her belly. “Yes, gentlemen. Can we help you?”
The short soldier nodded. “Yes, ma’am. We’re looking for Anna Morgan.”
Anna sucked in a sharp breath. Pulling her son close, she lifted her chin. “I’m Anna Morgan.”
The soldier’s eyes so
ftened as he gave a slight nod. “Ma’am. The Secretary of the Army has asked me to express his deep regret that your husband, Marcus, was killed in action in Iraq. The Secretary extends his deepest sympathy to you and your family in this tragic loss. A—”
The officer continued speaking, but the words failed to register in my brain. Blood swooshed against my skull.
Marcus was dead? How was that possible?
*
The minutes and hours following the news of Marcus’s death were a blur. It all seemed like a mistake. Any minute, I expected the phone to ring with news that Marcus was okay.
According to the notification officers, Marcus had sacrificed his own life when the commander’s vehicle came under attack. Because of my brother’s bravery, both the commander and a reporter had walked away unharmed.
While Anna took the news quietly, Jillian and my father questioned the officers for more information. I wanted them to stop talking. Who cared how it happened? Marcus was dead. Dead. Knowing how many times he’d been shot and at what time wasn’t going to change that.
Holding back tears, Anna signed some papers and was told a casualty assistance officer would be contacting her shortly. If she had any questions, there was a number she could call.
Any questions? The phrase seemed absurd.
After that, our pastor from church arrived as well as several family friends. We told them everything we knew as more friends and spouses of other soldiers arrived.
My mother asked me to help her make coffee and find something to feed our visitors. Grateful for the task, I went into the kitchen, which was full with friends from church.
“Aunt Vicki.” Travis tugged on my shirt. “Will you tie my shoes? Grandpa said I could help him feed the dogs if I put on my shoes.”
“Sure.” I knelt down, suddenly overcome by his little shoes and little shoelaces. How many times had I tied Allie’s brothers’ shoes like this? Marcus would never tie his son’s shoes like this again.
“You have to cross them, then make the rabbit ears,” Travis said, jolting me back to the present.
“Oh yeah.” I quickly tied his shoes, determined not to think about Allie, her brothers, and even Marcus.
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