by Susan Sands
“So, Sabine has proven with her deeds that she is a person of substance and good intentions, yes?”
“I thought so,” Ben agreed.
“Maybe our Sabine has carried around so much baggage of her own that she hasn’t been fortunate enough to have someone like herself to help her solve the burden.” Mom was still solving out loud.
“Your mother has a pretty solid point there, son.” Howard poured a substantial shot of whiskey into the dainty teacup Mom slid his way. He offered the bottle to Ben, who shook his head. The last thing he needed was a fuzzy mind and a hangover.
“I left out the worst part—she’s married, Mom.”
Her mother’s face fell. “Oh, honey. I’m so sorry.” She came over and sat next to him, taking his hands in hers. “I’ve seen the two of you together, and I can tell you that whatever the state of her marriage, it can’t be especially viable. She’s been here going on two years without a husband. Technically, she might be married, but she doesn’t have a marriage. No one can be apart that long and keep things on track.” Howard coughed, perhaps reminding her how long they were apart before finding one another again.
“But she didn’t tell me. Granted, we haven’t been close for very long, but it feels so wrong. I thought she was such an honest person,” Ben said. “And we’ve been—uh, close.”
His mother patted his hand. “Honey, people do things in desperation sometimes—often because they believe there isn’t another solution.”
Howard came over then. “Benjamin, I was involved in some seriously secret shit for more years than I can say—because it was secret, you understand—and there are lots of reasons folks keep important information to themselves. Often, it’s a matter of not trusting others with their secrets because secrets can be dangerous in the wrong hands. Now, I’m not sayin’ Sabine has some deep, dark something going on, but if this family feels she’s worth giving the benefit of the doubt then I’d be of a mind to extend that opportunity to her.”
“So, I should hear her out instead of shutting her down like a whiny ass that got his feelings hurt?” Ben asked, realizing his mother and stepfather were right.
Sabine might be in trouble. Surely his pride could move aside long enough to give her a chance to explain herself. Especially since he’d felt such a bone-deep connection from the moment they’d met. Didn’t that deserve a chance at more discovery? Surely his forever intuition meter couldn’t be that flaky. Because if it was, he would require far more therapy than at first he’d believed.
“So you’ll give her a chance to explain?” Mom asked.
“I will. I really care about her, and you know how long it’s been since that’s happened.”
She leaned over and kissed his cheek. “I know. I’m your mother, and I keep my eye on these things. And what I don’t see, your sisters keep me informed of.”
Ben stood. Coming here was absolutely the right decision. “Thank you both for listening and for your good advice. I know it’s the right thing to do.”
Howard thumped him on the back with his huge hand that resembled a bear’s paw. “Son, I never had a family of my own until now, and I’m doing my dead-level best to catch up on all this fathering.”
Ben laughed because he understood how genuine Howard’s words and his heart truly were. He loved their mother and wanted only her and their happiness. “Thanks, Howard. I’d call you Dad, but it might be a couple decades too late.”
Howard laughed, a big, booming sound. “It’s never too late, son.”
“Night, Mom. Love you.” He hugged his mother.
“I love you, Ben.”
Sabine barely slept. Her mother had called to let her know she would be out late, so there hadn’t been an opportunity to spill her upset when she’d gotten home.
So, she’d gone to bed and cried herself to sleep—something she hadn’t done in a very long time. This morning her eyes were beefy and swollen. She tried a cold rag and green teabags.
“Dear, what are you doing?” her mother asked from behind.
Sabine nearly shrieked. “Mom, don’t sneak up on me like that.” Sabine wore her robe, slippers, and had a towel wrapped around her wet hair. She stood, by the kitchen sink steeping teabags for medicinal purposes.
“Yes, but what are you doing?”
“My eyes are all red and swollen. I’m going to put teabags on them.”
“I’ve got some cream for that. I’ll go get it. In the meantime, you can come up with your best explanation as to why your eyes are red and swollen.”
“I’d rather not. I don’t want to be late for work.” But her mother had disappeared into her bedroom.
She continued with the teabag cure. “Ow.” Who knew green tea burned?
“I told you not to use that. Your eyes are too irritated. Here, try this.”
“Thanks.”
“Out with it.”
“Fine. James stopped by the office yesterday and we argued.”
“Why is he here?”
“More of Dad’s messengering, I guess. But I think he’s gone rogue. Anyway, I showed him the door, and Ben saw it. I told Ben I was married and who I really am.”
“Well, no wonder you’re all smushy this morning. I guess our hero didn’t take it very well?”
“No. He just seemed—so disappointed. Told me he believed I was the ‘real deal.’”
“Honey, Ben is the real deal, and he will get over his wounded pride. Anyone who knows you at all would believe you’ve kept things from them for a good reason. Give him a little time. I guarantee he’ll come around and want to know the whole story.”
Sabine wouldn’t count on that after seeing the look in Ben’s eyes just before he drove off, but her mother’s words did give her some hope. “Thanks, Mom. I hope so.”
Sabine brought the eye cream to her bathroom and carefully applied it to her poor eyes. Her mother’s words did bring some comfort. As did her eye cream.
As she finished getting dressed, she kept checking her phone, though there wasn’t any real reason to believe she would hear from Ben.
By the end of the day, she was back to feeling a little emotionally ragged again. When she stepped out of her office to lock the door, she sensed someone behind her. Heart pounding, she turned, pepper spray at the ready. Just before she released the trigger, Sabine realized it was Ben.
“Oh, my gosh, I nearly doused you with police-grade pepper spray. Don’t sneak up on me like that.” She noticed his expression was grim, and not at all his normal, teasing, smiling one.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I came because I want to know what’s going on with you. Clearly, you’ve got a whole history you’ve kept from us all. If you want to clear the air and explain yourself, I’m willing to give you that opportunity.”
“I’m not sure you want to know.” Sabine sighed. “Obviously, I’m not who you think I am. I mean, I am, but there’s a lot about me I haven’t told you. And I don’t know if you’ll ever want to speak to me again once you know the whole story.”
Ben’s expression was somewhat as she expected; hurt, angry, but mostly he appeared curious, which she hadn’t anticipated.
“How will I know if you don’t tell me?”
Sabine’s heart beat heavily in her chest. She tried to control the tiny bloom of hope taking root there. He hadn’t outright banished her from his life for her lies. Surely that was promising.
“Could we go someplace quiet? It’s a long, sad tale.”
“How about I pick up some food, you go home and change out of your work clothes, and meet me at my house? That way, we won’t be interrupted and you can leave whenever you want. This sounds like it might turn into a long evening.” Ben’s expression was still dark and serious, but he hadn’t kicked her to the curb.
Sabine tried a smile, but it fell flat on her lips. “Sounds like a good plan. I’ll bring along a few things to show you from home to better explain the situation. And Ben—” Their gazes connected. “I’m really sorry abou
t this. I’ve been planning to tell you everything, but the timing hasn’t worked out before now.”
“I’m willing to hear you out. But I can’t say I’m not hurt and extremely disappointed by all this.” He shook his head.
“And I appreciate it,” Sabine said. She’d been such an idiot to not let him know sooner who she was. Of course, her real feelings and trust in him was just recently confirmed as a viable thing. Before, Sabine’s opinion had been so colored by her patients’ experiences and gossip about him that her angst and confusion about who the real Ben Laroux was had clouded her judgment. He’d proven to her over and over during and since how truly honorable he was. Trustworthy and solid. She’d be a fool to let a man of his loyalty to family and friends get away. Plus, he was about as hot as they came.
Now, how to break it to him that she was everything he believed she wasn’t? And more?
They parted ways and headed to their respective vehicles.
Ben picked up the ribs from their favorite barbecue place, doing his dead-level best to dodge a few folks who tried to engage him in conversation. But, damn it, they just wouldn’t leave him be. “Ben, my man, I hear you’re seeing the hot therapist. Dude, she’s awesome. Shawna swears by her. Says Sabine keeps her ‘focused’ on what’s important. I swear Shawna was planning on leavin’ me before therapy. I even went a few times. I guess it’s not a good idea to go to the bar every night after work.”
Ben pasted on his listening face he used in court when he was impatient with a witness. “Wow, that’s fantastic, John. I know Shawna’s a great girl. You’d better treat her right and hang on to her.” Ben slapped John on the back and headed out the door.
Any dumbass, especially a mid-level intellect like John, who was lucky enough to marry a girl as smart and pretty as Shawna Gates ought to know hanging out in bars every night was a really bad idea.
Which brought him back to Sabine. She gave great advice to others. Good, sound, honest, and helpful advice. It just confused him even more. How could a person be such a walking, talking dichotomy? Unless there was a really good reason. He was hanging on to that. It had better be a good one. Normal people didn’t lie about their husbands, their identities, and whether or not their fathers were dead.
Sabine seemed very connected to her mother, and from what he could tell, their relationship appeared similar to that of his sisters with his own mom. They laughed and talked comfortably, touched, and hugged. Ben was intuitive about noticing small details as people interacted, and he’d not noticed anything strange between Elizabeth and Sabine. Except, maybe, they shared some pretty knowing looks between them. If they carried secrets, that made sense. Ben had just assumed it was a mother/daughter silent understanding thing.
The smell of the substantial orders of ribs, smoked sausage, potato salad, and baked beans were causing his brain’s focus to switch unwittingly to his stomach as it growled in protest and refused to be ignored.
When he pulled into his driveway, he saw that Sabine had already arrived. She hadn’t taken much time at home before coming here straightaway. The expression on her face when Sabine had confessed her secrets would stay with Ben a long time, maybe forever. She’d been so ashamed. Her fear of his reaction hurt him.
He parked and carried the bags up to where she waited on the front porch.
She hardly met his eyes. “Thanks for suggesting we come here. I really do want to have the chance to explain myself,” she said, and then raised her gaze to his. It conveyed a lot because, despite all he didn’t know about her, Ben believed he knew her heart.
“Well, I’m starved, and from what I know about you, you likely are too. And neither of us will be at our best on an empty stomach.” He put his key into the lock and opened the front door, and motioned for her to precede him.
“So, you’re married? Tell me about that.” Ben hit her with the question as soon as they’d sat down at his kitchen table and dug into the ribs. The same table where they’d shared scrambled eggs and laughed together after giving his king-sized bed a workout Sabine would never forget.
She took a long draw from the bottle of water in front of her. Might as well start there. “Technically, yes. We’ve been apart since I’ve been here in Ministry. Richard and I met when we were both very young. He was a progeny of my father. This is going to be a long, complicated story.”
“I’ve got time,” Ben said.
He’d demolished a slab of ribs already and was now working on the links of smoked sausage and potato salad. Clearly, talking and eating wasn’t a problem for him.
“Obviously, my father is Jean-Claude Prudhomme, former district attorney of New Orleans. Right now, he’s in the federal prison camp not far from here.”
“I’m familiar with his case and the facility. So, you and your mom are living in Alabama to be near him?”
“Well, that’s only the beginning. We’re mainly here to get away from all the craziness my father left behind in Louisiana. Here seemed near enough to keep an eye on what was happening with Dad, knowing we would need to go to the prison from time to time. We could never have any peace unless we did.”
Ben stopped eating then. He wiped his mouth and pushed his plate to the side. “Why did you leave your husband?”
“He was caught with a prostitute—well, two prostitutes, at the same time.”
“So, instead of behaving like the dutiful political wife and standing by your man, you skipped town.”
“No one knows about the prostitutes. The scandal never broke publicly. My father managed to clean up Richard’s mess before it got out.”
“So, Daddy, with all his faults took care of his little girl.”
Sabine rolled her eyes. “I kind of wish Richard had been shamed in front of the world. It would have given me a perfect excuse to leave him, because then, nobody would’ve blamed me for walking away from my marriage.”
He nodded. “So, what has he told his constituents?”
“That I’ve taken some time to recover from my father’s trial and public humiliation, and that I’m reevaluating political life.”
“So, you’ve had a nervous breakdown, according to your dear husband.”
“Something like that.”
“And you’ve allowed it to stand?”
“At first, I just wanted to run away from the anger and humiliation. Then, I was just so happy to be as far away from him as possible. I’d recently had a miscarriage and was extremely fragile from that.”
Ben’s eyes changed then. “I’m so sorry, Sabine. How horrible for you to endure losing a baby and then have your sleazebag husband behave that way.” His disgust was evident for Richard’s behavior.
Sabine smiled a little sadly. “I’m very glad those days are behind me. Richard had changed. Politics changed him, even from the very beginning. The power and popularity of public life became his lifeblood. He drew breath from it. The man I loved and married shriveled and was replaced by an egocentric caricature of his former self.”
“I’ve seen it happen to some of the attorneys who’ve gotten into politics, unfortunately, as well as professional athletes. It’s as if the rules of ethics and decency no longer apply to them.”
“Exactly. I believe that’s what happened to my father too. He became so powerful within the legal system that he believed he could control it.”
Ben nodded. “Sounds like he did for a long time.”
“Unfortunately, all the convictions during his tenure were overturned. Some of them will never be retried, causing dangerous criminals to be set free, which is the opposite of his original intention.”
“But he thought he was above the law and manipulated those convictions,” Ben said.
“Yep. If he’d let justice work, they’d most likely have been put in prison anyway,” Sabine agreed.
“But some of those convictions gained without due process likely put citizens away who were innocent of the charges,” Ben said.
“My dad figured they were guilty of something and h
ad slipped through the system already, and should be locked up, which is why he went to such lengths to circumvent the steps. Makes no sense to those of us who work hard to make sure we do things the right way.”
“But he’d seen too much by then. Too many violent criminals get off on technicalities and too many victims. I see more than I’d like to as an attorney, even though I don’t prosecute. But we must follow the laws and rules as written or put forth legislation to change them. It’s all we can do to make change.”
“It was vigilante justice, which never bears fruit. He didn’t trust the system to do its work.”
“Sabine, I see why you wanted to get away from your husband, but it’s been two years. Why haven’t you divorced him?” Ben asked.
Sabine hoped she could make him understand. “Richard doesn’t believe in divorce. Well, in our case he doesn’t. He also doesn’t think he’ll be reelected without a wife. So, he’s refused to grant me one until now. And he’s threatened to expose my lies here. He knows me well enough to understand that lying low and licking my wounds was tantamount to my healing.”
“Let me get this straight; he cheated with prostitutes, which is a deal-breaker in any marriage, yet he doesn’t believe in divorce?”
“I know. Maybe it’s not that he doesn’t believe in it, but that he is a hundred percent against it in his own case. But, I didn’t push it while I worked through some of my own emotional crap and, for a while, he left me alone. But I’ve recently demanded a divorce. Problem is, he’s blackmailing me into appearing with him at the Louisiana governor’s ball coming up in ten days or he’ll blow my cover and rain down the media circus on my quiet life.
“He agreed to the divorce with some pretty stiff contingencies, but wants to talk turkey on the details and have me by his side to demonstrate to the world that I’m still a hundred percent in support of his candidacy. I’m not sure I believe he’ll really grant me a divorce once I get there. It may be a ruse to get me to return.”