It was impossible to digest it quickly, that’s what I remembered. In fact, I’d swooned at the sight of the priceless desk—it really had seen the like of kings and queens. And now it was mine. Of course, I covered it with paper every time I worked on it, but I wasn’t as afraid of it as I had been when I’d first come to Scotland.
There were times when it did all seem unreal. I put my finger on the edge of the desk. It was real.
“Sis?” Wyatt said.
“I know. Pretty cool, huh?”
“Unbelievable that my nerdy sister … anyway, it’s really great.”
“Thank you.”
“This is so you!” Mom said. “If I could have picked a room for you to work in, it would look just like this room.”
I smiled. “I love that.”
“Do you get antsy, claustrophobic?” Dad asked.
“Well, it’s not a wide-open wheat field, but it’s not too small, and it has windows.” I pointed up.
“It’s quite the room,” Dad said, though I could sense that he felt the packed shelves could close in on him.
I laughed. “You’d get used to it.” Though, I wasn’t sure he ever would. And any indoor work space would be too small for him if it was any smaller than a Kansas plain. I needed to keep that in mind in my pursuit of convincing them to join me in my new country.
Mom stepped closer to a shelf I’d recently stacked with some small bejeweled jewelry boxes. I was pretty sure the jewels weren’t precious stones, but not completely convinced. I hadn’t figured out the answer, and when I had time to work on the project, I wouldn’t be surprised to find something valuable. I’d found a Fabergé egg last month, on the back of a shelf, tipped over and reminding me of Humpty Dumpty, but, fortunately, without the cracks.
I remembered the egg and Edwin’s surprise at its discovery. He hadn’t remembered ever owning it. At first. He had remembered it eventually. It seemed he remembered most things, eventually, but perhaps not everything.
Angus’s book had been away from the shop for at least twenty years. Maybe that was asking too much of anyone’s memory. But it was such a memorable book.
It’s so much darker when a light goes out than it would have been if it had never shone.
The bookish voice was from John Steinbeck’s The Winter of Our Discontent. It was about loss, but not the loss of something like a book. It was about a bigger loss, something heart breaking.
My mind, dreams included, had had been filled with Nessie and Norval since the moment I’d seen the cards on the ground by the church door. Angus and his priceless book had taken up some of my thoughts, but I wondered if that bookish voice was trying to tell me about Angus and the loss of his grandfather. He’d waited so long to open the trunk that held the book and note that the discovery had probably been like losing him again. It was sometimes better to leave things in the dark. Sometimes we found ourselves illuminating things we didn’t even know were lacking the light.
“Delaney,” Mom said. “You with us?”
“Oh. Sorry. Yes,” I said.
“My girl still has her moments, huh?” Mom said.
I looked at Dad as Mom turned to face the shelf again. He and I shared a smile as he furtively put his finger up to the side of his nose. I liked our continuing secret.
“I guess so,” I said. “What were you saying?”
She turned toward me again. “I wondered if your job would be over when all of this is organized, though I doubt that will happen any time soon.”
“I haven’t asked that question.” I looked around. “Maybe I’ll make sure I never finish.”
“Oh, you don’t have a thing to worry about. You’ve found a place and people who will welcome you forever. Besides, you have the pub too, if you ever need a job,” Dad said.
“That’s true. We’ll see, but I’m not worried.” I wasn’t. At all. However, business ownership would certainly be different than anything I’d ever done before.
“Tom served us some of his favorite whisky the other night. I didn’t know I liked whisky,” Mom said.
“I didn’t know you liked whisky either.”
“Well, I’m not interested in drinking a lot of it, but if I’m going to drink any at all, I want something that tastes like that.”
“Delaney, have you seen these?” Wyatt held up some old handcuffs. “I bet there’s a story here.”
“I have seen them, but I haven’t researched them yet.”
“So cool.” He placed them carefully back onto the shelf.
I heard muffled noises coming from the other side that included an uptick in the tone of Rosie’s voice. We hadn’t consciously intended for that to be a signal that she might need some help, but when I heard it now, I hurried over to check on her.
I herded everyone out of the warehouse, locked the door, and led the way up the stairs. The door at the top opened just as I was reaching for the knob.
“Oh! Hello,” she said.
“Everything okay?” I asked.
“Aye, aye,” she said. “There’s a woman here tae see ye.”
“Who?”
“I didnae get her name, but she said she had tae put her ears in. She’s old, that’s all I know.”
“Okay.” I turned back to my parents and handed them my keys. “Feel free to go back and look around all you want but lock the door when you’re inside and when you leave, three turns of the key.”
All three of them sent me questioning looks. Why had I made them leave in such a hurry only to send them back? It had been unconscious, a habit made from being so aware of the warehouse and making sure it was always locked up, always secured, for the past year. They chose to go back and explore some more.
As my family turned to head back down the dark side stairs, I followed Rosie down the other side.
Our visitor sat in Rosie’s chair behind the front desk. She held a happy Hector as she scratched behind his ears. He noticed me but sent me a rare “Do Not Disturb” pair of eyes. He did not want to be removed from his new person’s attention.
She was old, older than Rosie, but there comes a point where sometimes eighty and ninety have an equal shot at being correct. Her short, gray hair peeked out from under the red scarf over her head. I thought she should be wearing a warmer cap to match her thick, fleece winter coat and her dark woolen, fingerless gloves. Bright green eyes behind thick glasses looked up at me when she was able to pull them away from Hector.
“Och, lass, I love the wee dogs,” she said.
“Hector’s especially wonderful,” I said, recognizing her voice, I thought.
“Aye,” she said a beat later.
I noticed hearing aids, but I also thought she had read my lips.
“I’m Delaney,” I said when she was looking up at me again. “Are you here to see me?”
“I am,” she said. “You were in my cottage up by the loch. Ye rang me a couple hours ago. I was coming into town anyway. I thought I would see what’s so important that ye’ve rang me twice now, as well as visited me at my home.”
“Ava. I wondered.”
“Aye. I cannae hear well on the telephones, and my neighbor told me ye seemed particularly inquisitive. I read yer note and ye seem like a sweet young woman. I had tae see so for meself.” She squinted at me playfully. “Ye look awright, but I have a question before ye ask me what ye wanted tae ask me.”
“I’m listening.”
“Ye didnae take even one wee slice of the bread. Why?”
“I thought it would be rude.”
“Och, then ye have a lot tae learn. If someone bakes a bread, that someone wants it eaten and enjoyed. Next time, ye should take a piece.” She smiled.
“She’s right,” Rosie added. She hadn’t even tried to pretend to look busy doing something else. “It’s an insult ye didnae cut a piece.”
“I’ll do better next time,” I said, wondering if the rules were the same in Kansas. I’d have to ask my mom.
“Good. Now, what is it ye want tae ask
me that ye’d ring me twice and then drive all the way up tae see me?”
“I have questions about Norval Fraser,” I said.
Ava’s smile saddened but remained in place. She looked down at the contented dog on her lap. “Norval Fraser was the love of my life, even though I didnae have much opportunity tae know many a young man. But him not coming home again tae stay was the best thing that ever happened to me. I married, had a child of my own, my boy. My husband’s long gone now, but it all turned out for the better. I heard the news about Norval being arrested for killing his great-nephew, but I have no way of knowing if he was capable of such a thing. Is that what ye wanted tae know?”
“Well, not really,” I said. “Though I’m sorry to hear that he left behind a sad story.”
She’d watched my mouth again and her eyebrows lifted ever so slightly. “Weel, it wasnae him as much as it was his father’s abandonment. I ken who was tae blame.”
I looked toward the front door and then back at Ava. “How did you get here? Your son?”
“No. Train and cab today,” she said as if I should have figured that out already.
“I’ll make sure you get home easily, but can we move to the back of the bookshop, where there’s a little more privacy?”
I felt bad that I asked her to move, but she stood and walked easily. The train and cab probably hadn’t been a challenge. She kept hold of Hector and resumed scratching his ears when she sat again. I excused myself for a moment to get her some tea and to let my family know I would be busy for a while. I told them they could join us, but they didn’t want to overwhelm Ava; they decided to stay and explore the warehouse, a place my dad seemed to find more interesting and less claustrophobic each minute that passed.
I called Edwin, who’d left for lunch too, and asked him to join us if he could. He could and was already headed back, arriving only a few minutes later. Hamlet also came in, and after he introduced himself found things to keep him busy away from the back table. In her always reliable way, Rosie placed some shortbread on the table that she’d made just that morning. Her Scottish shortbread deserved accolades and blue ribbons.
I also called Elias and asked if he would take Ava back up to Wikenton when we were done talking. It was a huge favor, but he didn’t mind, and I knew he would have been offended if I hadn’t thought of asking him.
I hadn’t meant to make such a big deal about our visitor from Loch Ness, but every step I took to make sure our conversation was somewhat private and that she was comfortable gave me time to think about the questions I wanted to ask her. She’d known Norval and his family a long time ago, but since she wasn’t a part of his family, maybe she had some emotional distance that would help clear up some of the mysteries.
And, she’d been in the film, not to mention the photo in her house.
Edwin and I sat at the back table with Ava and Hector. Rosie hovered nearby, and Hamlet went over to the dark side to make sure my family was doing okay.
“Ava, can you start from the beginning?” I asked. “Back when you first knew Norval. You knew him, then, before his father left, right? They moved to Edinburgh shortly after that, correct?”
“They left Wikenton a few months after Angus disappeared. Norval and I were wee-uns, only seven, eight by the time the family left. Norval and I were connected from the verra first. We were born on the same stormy Scotland night.” She chuckled once. “Or, that’s the way our parents told the story. For all we knew, it could have been clear and beautiful, but this is Scotland and stormy gave it more drama. I asked Norval’s sisters once if the story was true, but neither of them could claim tae remember the weather. All they could remember was the screaming child that joined their family and that he and I arrived at aboot the same time.” She paused and sighed.
“You were always friends then. Close?” I asked.
She nodded slowly. “We were always close, aye, but we both took our coorse turns.”
I knew she meant “naughty,” and was pleased I didn’t need a translator.
She continued. “We were together all the time, with no other bairns around our age. It was a small community. And when my da went off to war and his—Leopold—didnae, the families became even closer. With all the men gone, we had tae look after each other. Leopold looked after many families. He was a good man, until he made that terrible decision tae run away with Flora Folsom.”
“Did you know Flora?”
“Everyone knew Flora. ‘Flora the Floozy,’ I believe we all, at one time or another called her. Even us kids. She was young and beautiful and when her husband went off tae fight, she became bored quickly. Och, probably not her fault. She was so very young. Too young tae be married and then left on her own.” Ava blinked before her eyes unfocused in thought. “There are days that I remember that time like it was yesterday. The sirens, the bombs. The sounds were terrifying, and they never leave ye.” She looked at Edwin and me. “It made sense tae me when the men came back different. How could they not?” She shook her head. “Anyway, my da didnae make it back. In fact, he was killed only two weeks after leaving tae fight. Leopold took care of us all. And when he left, we all had tae figure oot how tae pick up the pieces, particularly Norval’s mother. My mother was there for her, and though my mother would never take the credit, she probably saved them from a fate worse than the streets. She made sure they had money before they came here, tae Edinburgh. She was a good woman.” She shook her head again.
I looked at Edwin with a question in my eyes. He nodded that he thought she would be okay.
After a few moments, I asked, “If they moved to Edinburgh shortly after Leopold left, how did you and Norval remain friends?”
“Once he could figure out how to get rides from his sisters or others, he was there every weekend, searching for the monster. Many times one of his sisters brought him, but not all the time. I went with them on their explorations. It was a natural friendship at first, but then it turned romantic.” She tsked and smiled wryly. “One of his sisters should probably have come with him every time tae save us from … We … well, we were young and nothing happened that caused any problems. Anyway, believe it or not Norval wasn’t as … obsessed before the age of about eighteen. He was curious and wanted to find Nessie, of course, but the real obsession didn’t begin until he was almost eighteen. Before that, we all just spent a lot of time having a good time.”
“What happened at eighteen?” Edwin said.
“He quit believing, I suppose.”
“In the Loch Ness Monster?” I asked.
“Oh, no, lass, he would have never quit believing in her. No, he quit believing that the monster would give him back his da. That was a difficult pill for him tae swallow. I thought it was something else too, but Norval would never admit it—I think he, deep down, came tae believe that his father might have truly abandoned him. I think his obsession became more about proving the monster did take his father, than finding his father. If the monster took Leopold, then he didn’t leave by his own accord. So many men left, but the only one in our village who chose tae leave was Leopold. It ruined Norval, and ruined us eventually. The realization ruined his relationships with everyone. His family had tae take care of him. He couldnae keep a job. He would have been on the streets if not for them.”
“That had to be tough,” I said.
“Aye. ’Twas.”
“I don’t understand,” Edwin said. “Did he just become mature enough tae change the way he thought or was it something else? An event?”
“I believe that Nessie, herself, told him.”
I cleared my throat. “Nessie spoke to him?”
“Not with words so much but she can communicate. Her eyes are a funny blue. Ye can spot them under water.”
“Did you … do you talk to her much?” I asked.
“I havenae in decades. I told her tae leave me be. Once Norval wasnae a part of my life, I couldnae bear tae even see her swim by.”
There was no hesitation with her words, no
tone of apology as if she might be weaving some sort of fabrication. No wink.
“And all you had tae do was tell her tae go away?” Edwin said.
“Aye. She was friendly tae us. We were friendly tae her. Once she’s been seen, she kens she cannae hide anymore and she likes company. Or she used tae—too many people nowadays. Toys, pictures, lies, cameras everywhere.”
I thought about Norval’s collection. Was it research or a tribute?
I still didn’t believe in the Loch Ness Monster, but I knew World War II, that time in history, was traumatic in many ways, and there was no doubt in my mind that all the trauma that Norval and his family, and in some way Ava, went through, was bound to affect them all, one way or another.
I’d seen pictures now. I’d heard stories. I’d read first-hand accounts. What would it take to convince me? I wasn’t sure.
“Do you know if Norval ever heard from his father again?” I asked.
“No. My mother and I exchanged some letters with Leopold over the years. Just a couple. They were brief. He was apologetic, but not coming back, that was certain.”
“Where did he go?” Edwin asked.
“He and Flora went tae America,” she nodded at me, “yer neck of the woods, though I dinnae ken if the place he went tae is close tae you. America is such a big place.”
“Do you know what city?” I asked.
“Oklahoma,” she said. “Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. It’s funny sounding.”
Not far from Kansas, it turned out, and even closer with the Internet. My fingers itched to do some deeper research.
“Did he ever come back to Scotland, even just tae visit?” Edwin asked.
“Not that I’m aware of,” Ava said.
Edwin sat forward and leaned his arms across the table. “Ava, I have a strange question if you don’t mind.”
“Aye?”
“Do you, by chance, remember if Leopold Fraser, or anyone in the Fraser family, was particularly interested in the legend and stories of King Arthur?”
The Loch Ness Papers Page 23