by Devney Perry
His cowboy hat dipped as he exchanged greetings, then my stomach dropped.
Because I knew that hat.
Son of a bitch. How was I supposed to avoid Easton in a bar this size? Wasn’t he supposed to be at dinner?
He walked inside, scanning the room and lifting a hand to wave at a few tables. Then he walked to the bar, taking off his hat as he pulled out the stool that had just been vacated. He greeted the guy directly on his left, then grinned at the bartender as she approached.
Easton’s gaze drifted past her and when he spotted me, the grin dropped.
Ouch.
I lifted my glass, giving him a silent salute.
Easton acknowledged me with a single nod.
My heart was in my throat as I took another drink, wishing I hadn’t ordered that cheeseburger. Wishing I was in any other seat than this where I had no choice but see him when I faced forward.
How was I supposed to avoid that strong jaw and those dark, dreamy eyes when they were right there?
“Here you go.” The bartender emerged from the kitchen with a plastic basket lined with parchment paper. At least I wouldn’t have to wait long for my meal. The cheeseburger was bigger than my face and the heap of fries was the equivalent of three extra-large potatoes. “Hope you’re hungry.”
I had been. “Thanks.”
I cut the burger in half as she returned to her post, leaning a hip against the bar as she focused all her attention on one man.
Easton.
I kept my eyes on my meal, but the claw of jealousy scraped deeper every time I heard her laugh carry over the music. Or when I’d catch his smile from the corner of my eye. I was chewing with rabid fury when she leaned in closer to whisper something in his ear.
He laughed. She laughed.
She smiled. He smiled.
I was most definitely not laughing or smiling.
No, I was his latest conquest, and he’d waited a whole three days before moving on to someone else. Or maybe go back for another round with a former lover.
She was gorgeous and fresh faced. Her blond hair brushed the tops of her shoulders in effortless, beach waves. Her tee dipped low enough to show a hint of cleavage and she had the perfect hourglass figure, curves I’d only dreamt of having.
But it was her smile that I envied most. It was carefree and effortless. A pretty smile. One that made Easton smile too, wider than I’d seen since arriving in Montana.
He didn’t smile around me, not like that. And as I’d suspected, it was devastating.
“Hey, sweetheart.”
I jerked, forcing my eyes away from Easton and the bartender as a man leaned against the bar at my side.
“How’s it going?” he asked.
“Fantastic,” I deadpanned, not in the mood to deal with stranger small talk and a guy who likely saw me as fresh meat.
He’d brought a beer along from wherever he’d emerged and tipped it to his lips as he grinned. “New in town or just visiting.”
“Visiting.” I ate another bite, busying my mouth so I didn’t have to talk, and cast a glance toward Easton.
His gaze was waiting, the tension in his jaw visible as he squeezed his own beer bottle to death.
For a moment, I thought he might come over, but then the bartender stood in front of him, giving Easton an eye-level shot of her generous breasts.
My appetite vanished and I tossed the uneaten portion of my burger into the tray, wiping my hands and lips with a napkin. Then I dove for my wallet, ripping out a hundred-dollar bill and slapping it on the bar.
I wasn’t sure how much a burger and a cocktail cost in Clear River, Montana, but that should cover it.
“Leaving already?” the man asked.
Not bothering with the obvious answer, I slipped the strap of my purse over my shoulder and—eyes forward—I walked out of the bar and into the fading evening light.
In a way, I should be happy he’d come to the bar. That he’d flirted with another woman in front of me. I’d been conflicted over what to do with Easton, but tonight had been eye-opening.
This was not the place for me.
Easton was not the man for me. As much as I liked my little cabin, I didn’t fit here. He’d been right all along.
I didn’t fit.
Spending three months here wouldn’t change that fact. Bet or not, I was leaving. He could gloat to his family while I was a thousand miles south, enjoying some California sunshine.
I’d stick around long enough to spend a few more nights with Katherine. But as soon as the groceries in my trunk were gone, so was I.
The light was nearly gone by the time I made it home to the cabin. The stars were out in full force and the temperature was dropping fast. Before unloading the Cadillac, I made a fire to warm up the cabin, then I busied myself with putting groceries away.
There was enough food here for a week. I’d invite Katherine over as often as possible and the two of us would have a bit more time together before I hit the road. If I was lucky, the weather would hold out and I wouldn’t get snowed in.
By the time the groceries were unloaded, the cabin was toasty warm and I poured myself a hearty glass of wine, lifting my glass to the empty room. “Cheers to another week. And a lonely Friday night.”
Tears flooded my eyes, and before I could pull them in, I was crying off my makeup.
This wasn’t why I’d come to Montana. This wasn’t why I’d started this journey.
I wanted to feel, but this? No, thank you.
But the dam had broken and there was no holding back the flood. Drops of ugly poured from my body in a stream of uncontrollable tears and broken sobs.
I stood there, in the middle of the room with my wine sloshing over the rim of my glass and cried.
I cried for the life I’d worked so hard to build. The life that had meant so fucking much to me three months ago. The life I’d left behind.
Selling the company and leaving Boston hadn’t been a mistake, but for the first time, I mourned. Because twelve million dollars in the bank hadn’t made me any less alone.
The tears came faster. The sobs wracked harder. My knees were seconds from giving way, collapsing me into a pathetic puddle, when two arms wrapped around me and kept me from falling.
Easton pinned me to his chest, holding me with one arm as he took the wine from my hand and set it on the table beside us. Then he let me soak the front of his green shirt with my tears.
I held tight, letting him keep me standing, because I couldn’t seem to pull it together. No matter how many deep breaths I sucked in through my nose, they exhaled in a mess. Until finally, minutes later, one of them stuck. Then another. And the tears just . . . ran out.
Even when I stopped crying, Easton didn’t let me go.
“I’m okay.” I pushed him away and wiped my face dry, turning my back to him because he’d witnessed rock bottom. “Sorry.”
“What was that, Gem?”
“Nothing.” I waved him off. “What are you doing here?”
“You left the bar upset.”
Honestly, I was surprised he’d noticed. And that he’d come to check on me. Or maybe he was here for a hookup. Regardless, I was such a train wreck that I hadn’t even heard him drive up. “It’s nothing. Sometimes women cry.”
“Bullshit. What the hell is going on?”
“Nothing. It’s been a long week.”
“Gemma.” He took my elbow and spun me to face him.
“What!” I batted his hand away. “It’s nothing.”
He stood there, unwavering, and leveled me with a look that said he had no intention of leaving until he got his answer.
The stubborn ass. “You were flirting with the bartender.”
“Liz?” He barked a laugh. “I don’t flirt with Liz. She’s been my friend since we were in diapers.”
“That was flirting. You smiled at her. You were laughing and whispering.”
“Yeah, she told me the guy three seats down smelled like cheese. I l
aughed because she’s funny and easy to hang out with.”
Long-time friend or not, I didn’t want to hear about how much he enjoyed another woman’s company. “You don’t laugh with me.”
“You’re not funny.”
I poked him in the pec. “I’m being serious.”
He scowled and rubbed the spot where I’d jabbed him. “So am I. Say something funny and I’ll laugh.”
“But I’m not funny.” The tears came again and this time, they just made me angry. “Goddamn it!”
He shook his head, coming closer as I furiously wiped my eyes dry. “You were jealous.”
“Yes,” I admitted. “I have some issues when it comes to men.”
“Let’s get one thing straight.” He clasped my shoulders, looming and waiting until he had my undivided attention. “There are no men. There’s one man. Me. And if you have an issue with me, we’ll sure as fuck talk it through.”
I dropped my head into my hands, the shame no doubt showing on my face. “Sorry.”
Easton took my wrists and pulled them away. “Should we talk about why you’ve been avoiding me this week?”
“You wouldn’t take me to your bed.” Apparently, there was no stopping the truth flood tonight.
“Huh?”
“You screwed me against the wall.” I flicked my wrist, motioning to said wall. “And made me come on that bench in your garage.”
“Three times.”
“Three times.” I rolled my eyes. “But you wouldn’t take me to your bedroom.”
He shook his head, blinking as he tried to make heads or tails of my nonsense. I didn’t blame him for the confused look on his face.
“Ugh. Never mind.” I threw my hands in the air. “I’m losing my fucking mind. Welcome to the mixed-up world of Gemma Lane. This actually feels like your fault. What are you doing to me?”
“The same thing you’re doing to me,” he grumbled. “Driving me fucking insane.”
I laughed.
It wasn’t funny but it was funny.
“I worked so hard to not be crazy. To not be my mother. I left her house and decided I would never be out of control again. I’d prove that I was better. So I worked hard and showed the world—myself—that I would never be her. I succeeded. I am a millionaire. I am in control of my destiny, and I am not the person she tried to make me. I am not her.”
“You’re not her.”
I shook my head. “No.”
There was a comfort in saying it out loud. And for the moment, that was enough to soothe some of my jagged edges.
Mortifying as it was, I was glad the person here to witness it was Easton.
“I’m sorry,” I said again. “Forget about all of this. Please.”
“I can’t do that.” He lifted his hand and cupped my cheek. “You said you don’t want to talk about it. I get that. But this is the second time you’ve cracked the door to your past, darlin’. I think it’s time to open up and let me in.”
“It doesn’t matter. The whole point of this rant is that I might be having a crazy moment, but my mother was certifiably insane. No one rescued me from her. So I rescued myself. And part of that meant shutting out the world. But here things are so . . . different. I can’t hide from you in my work. I don’t have work. I wanted to feel things and here I am, feeling again. It’s an adjustment.”
He studied my face, his eyes softening. “That goes both ways. You’re all I’ve thought about for three days and I know the smartest thing for me to do would be to walk out that door. But . . .”
“But what?” I whispered as his thumb traced a line of tingles on my skin.
“But I’m going to take you into the bedroom and make sure you know that the reason I fucked you against that wall and in my garage was not because you don’t deserve the bedroom.” He bent and brushed his lips against mine. “But because when it comes to you, I have no control.”
Chapter Eleven
Easton
“Morning, boss,” Rory called from the hayloft before tossing a bale down. “You’re here early.”
“Rory, what are you doing here?”
“Oh, uh, Johnson called to see if I’d cover his shift today. He’s sick or something.”
Sick, my ass. Johnson didn’t like Saturday mornings because he was usually at the bar too late on Friday nights. He’d probably shown up not long after I’d left to chase Gemma last night, then stayed until Liz kicked him out at two. This was the second time in a month I’d come to the stables on a Saturday expecting to see him and finding Rory instead.
If Johnson wasn’t careful, I was going to fire him and give Rory a hefty raise.
Rory was due one anyway. He showed up on time and worked hard. His attitude was unmatched. Hell, it was better than mine.
“When you’re done up there, come on into my office.”
“All right.” He nodded and tossed down another bale.
I left him to his work and retreated to my office. The room was cold, so I turned up the baseboard heaters before shrugging off my coat. Then I eased the door closed to keep the warmth inside and settled in behind my desk.
Doing paperwork and checking emails was not my favorite task, let alone on a Saturday morning before seven, but after slipping out of Gemma’s bed this morning, I hadn’t wanted to go home.
She’d been out cold, her hair spread across the pillow and her face burrowed under the covers. I’d lit a fire to warm up the cabin, then driven away with the image of her sleeping peacefully in my mind.
Last night had been intense. Finding her sobbing, breaking down, had destroyed me. I knew she’d been embarrassed, not that there was anything to be ashamed of. And as much as I’d wanted to dive deeper into her past, the moment I’d kissed her, the chance to talk had flown out the window.
The two of us had spent the night exploring each other’s bodies and the sex had been just as intense. She met my desire with a raging passion of her own.
That woman had me twisted as tight as the braid on a bullwhip.
So this morning, I escaped to the stables because the distraction of work might be my only hope of getting my head on straight.
After the night Gemma had driven out to my house, I’d given her some space, not wanting to come on too strong. Last night, I’d begged out of family dinner because I hadn’t wanted to make her uncomfortable in front of my family.
Maybe giving her that space had been a mistake.
But I was glad I’d found her at the bar.
Had I been flirting with Liz? I’d known her since we were kids. Her family was as local to this valley as mine. She was my friend. We’d shared a fumbling kiss sometime during middle school, but besides that, our relationship had always been platonic.
Liz touched my arm a lot, and she always hung out near my end of the bar when I was in, but did she have feelings for me?
No. No way. Liz didn’t act anything like a woman who wanted me in her bed. She was a friend. Nothing more.
Gemma was the only woman who’d be tangled in my sheets.
She put on such a strong façade. She was fearless and wild. But beneath it all, she was scared. Of me. Of her future. She hid her fears well, but last night, I’d been given a glimpse. Would she run from those fears? Or would she stay here and face them?
Would she let me in?
Rory appeared in the door’s window and I waved him inside. He shrugged off the Carhartt coat he’d been wearing and hung it on the hook beside my own.
“Thanks for coming in today,” I said.
“No problem. I like the hours.”
I steepled my fingers in front of my chin and took a long look at the boy. Though he wasn’t really a boy anymore. Maybe because I’d seen him grow up, I still saw him as the kid who’d chased Mom’s border collie, Max, around the yard. But Rory stood nearly as tall as me at six three and if he kept working like he did, he’d fill out his lanky frame.
“I’m giving you a raise.”
His jaw dropped. “You are?�
�
“An extra two dollars an hour.” There was no need to wait on his raise. He’d earned it. And it was time to give him more responsibilities too. “I want you to start shadowing Cash in the afternoons when he’s not on a ride. You’re a natural with horses but I want you to get more experience with breaking the younger animals.”
If this new horse facility worked out, Rory would be a good asset for Cash. It would suck to lose him here, but I wasn’t going to cost the kid an opportunity at a better job because hiring stable hands was a pain in my ass.
“Okay.” A grin stretched across his face. “You got it.”
“Good. Focus on the stables this morning. Then I’d like you to take Oreo out for a long ride. Work him hard. Cash said he was a real shit the other day for one of the guests. Maybe he just needs to burn some energy and get a reminder about who’s in charge.”
“Will do.” Rory stood from the chair and grabbed his coat but paused as he opened the door. “Thanks, Easton. I sure do appreciate the raise. And the opportunity.”
“You’ve earned it.”
He nodded, closing the door behind him and leaving me to my emails. There wasn’t much for me to do on a regular basis in the office. Thankfully, our bookkeeper made sure the bills and employees were paid. It allowed me to be out where I needed to be, on the land with the animals and with the staff.
But there were days when desk work was unavoidable. The schedule needed to be drafted for next month so I could send it to Katherine. We’d have a three-hour meeting to pair my staff with her resort activities and guest needs. Then I’d fill in gaps to make sure all the ranch work was covered.
I rolled up my sleeves and dove in, putting in the couple of hours necessary to work it through, while I ate a few granola bars I kept stashed in my desk. After the schedule was penciled into the calendar, I fired up my computer and scrolled through the emails I’d been ignoring for the last week.
Most were deleted and I’d almost cleared through everything when the ding of an incoming message filled the room.