There was no way to put words to all the feelings running through my system, but it felt something like being sucker punched in the gut.
“I can’t sign with him, Cory.”
I slid my fingers behind her ear and swept my thumb across her tears, shaking my head. “You sure you didn’t hear her wrong?”
“She told me the guys at the label love our sound together. And they were freaked when I went missing Monday. Then I was late to the photo shoot. I guess they don’t trust me, but they don’t even know me.” She was back to her face-buried, shoulders-shaking status, and my gut was twisting harder. I held her close, resting my chin on her hair, trailing my fingers across her back, everything I was amped about earlier like some kind of a distant memory now. This was her dream, fizzling out and fading into something else right in front of my eyes. I wanted to save it for her, but what was I supposed to do? It was Kyle, or nothing. How was that right?
Just the thought of that kid made me want to punch something, let alone the thought of him touring the world with Lea, looking at her with that user smile, night after night on end. He was a punk who’d had everything handed to him on a silver platter. I bet he thought Lea was just the next course, didn’t he?
“Where is he?” I growled.
She trembled, twining her fingers behind my neck, shaking her head. “It’s not his fault.”
“I’d bet my paycheck he had something to do with it.”
“No. It’s my fault. I got too freaked after the interview. I shouldn’t have hiked by myself. You were right. I was being so selfish and stupid.” She dropped her forehead to my chest. “I’ll just pull out of the competition.”
“What did you just say?” Fire roared through my chest.
“Let him have it.” She shrugged. “It’s obviously what he wants, anyway, right? I can find another way to get a contract. Maybe someone will share a video of my performance and someone in the industry will see it.” She swallowed and lifted her face, her puffy eyes finding mine again. “At least I’ll still have you.”
I grunted, Garrett’s words reeling back through my mind. I’d given my word. I’d give up everything in the world to see her dreams happen.
“You’re not bowing out of anything, Lea. Give me a few hours, and everything’ll be back the way it was supposed to be.” Whoever was responsible for this needed to pay.
She closed her eyes and rested her forehead against my chin. “Don’t worry about it and just kiss me instead. I just . . . don’t want to think about it right now.” Something shifted in her eyes, and she was begging me to help her forget.
I tucked one of those rebel curls behind her ear and trailed her soft cheek with my thumb. If there was anything in the world I could do to ease her pain right now, I would, and kissing her wasn’t the worst thing on the list of possibilities.
Tilting her chin, I dipped my face until our breaths melded. I pressed my mouth to hers, releasing a sigh of relief. Kissing Lea obliterated all my brain function, but it made me forget all my problems, too.
Someone whooped near the lake, and we split up faster than a logger splits wood. I pulled her back farther into the shadows.
“Think they saw us?” she asked, through hard breaths.
I shook my head and wove my fingers through hers. “Not sure. We should probably head back, though. Just in case.”
She sighed and leaned her head against my shoulder for a minute, too quiet. I wanted her to tell me everything going through her mind, but I didn’t want to make her think about the negative. Lea was Lea. She’d tell me what she wanted to.
“Do you think I should really do it?”
Having her in my arms felt so good, I’d forgotten what we were even talking about before. “Do what?”
“Sign with Kyle?”
All the relief I’d just found rushed out of my body, hounded out by a jealousy I didn’t want to admit to. Especially not to her. The guy looked like a class-act user, and after our near-altercation, I knew she was in his sights. There was no part about her being around him I liked. Not at all. But I’d promised Garrett. I couldn’t let her just walk away from her dream, even if it came by a different path than she expected it to.
“You didn’t answer.”
I tensed.
She nuzzled her face into my neck. “I don’t like it, either.”
The faint echo of Pastor Gregg’s prayer from what seemed like a lifetime ago sounded in my soul . . .
Even for the ones who think they’re too far gone, Lord, show them that help’s never further than a prayer away.
“Lea?”
“Mm?”
“Wanna pray with me?”
She tightened her grip around my torso. “Yeah.”
I bowed my head, searching for the words to pray over her, but finding the right ones seemed near impossible.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do, God.” Lea’s voice broke through my attempts at a decent start, and she blew a heavy sigh. “I’ve been running from You, so I don’t even know if You’ll want to help me now. I’m sorry, though. For my freak-out after Dad passed. For the way I’ve been making all these decisions without You.”
I rubbed her back and just listened to her, this beautiful, broken girl pouring herself out to a God she believed was really there. I did, too, but man. I’d never told God straight-up how I felt, the way she was telling Him now. Like He was standing right beside us. I’d never felt this close to Him before.
“I want to be who I was before all of this. Who you made me to be. But it’s so hard. Especially without Dad.” She went quiet, her shoulders shaking as she dropped her head to my chest again. “I miss you, Jesus. So much. Please help me. Tell me what to do about this whole contract thing. You know I can’t stand Kyle, and maybe that’s wrong, but it’s true. Please show me what to do.”
I rubbed her shoulders and cleared my throat, my heart racing at the thought of praying out loud, and in front of Lea, but I had to. For her. “I’m a man of few words, God. So I’ll just trust that you know my heart. Uh . . . help Lea. Guide her through this. Give her everything she needs to use that voice You gave her. Don’t let me, or Kyle, or any frilly record agent get in her way. I know without a doubt You want her to use that voice. Help her do it. Help me help her. And thank you. For letting us cross paths up here. For the time we’ve had together. Amen.”
“Amen,” she whispered into my neck.
I didn’t think I’d ever lived inside a more sacred moment—holding the girl of my dreams while she poured her heart out to God. It was a feeling I could get used to.
“How did fishing with Garrett go?”
“Better than I hoped.”
“Yeah?”
“He basically gave us the green light.”
“What?”
A slow grin pulled across my mouth, and I released a contented breath. “Yup.”
“So, we’re good? We can do this for real?”
A chuckle rolled from my chest, and I pressed my lips to her hair one last time. “We’ll make it official after your camp week’s over.”
Soft laughter poured out of her mouth, and she pushed me back, slapping my arm. “You jerk. You could’ve started this whole conversation with that!”
“Maybe.” I released a contented sigh and gave her hand a squeeze, the light on the lake from earlier doing passes across the bridge now. “We’d better get out of here. I’m still a staffer, and you’re still a camper.”
“Forget it. I’ll hightail it out of this place so fast.”
“No, you won’t.” I cupped her face and held her strong gaze. “You’re gonna stick around, and you’re gonna show Kyle up at that competition.”
A wave of doubt flickered through her eyes. “Am I, though?”
“Without a doubt. And I mean it. If he doesn’t crawl off that stage crying like a baby, I think I’ll have to reconsider this whole thing.”
She scoffed and rolled her eyes, and then she threw herself into my arms and squ
eezed the living daylights out of me, showering my lips with little kisses that stole my breath. “I meant what I said yesterday. I love you, Cory.”
I closed my eyes and held her close, my heart drumming out a cadence I’d never felt before—wild, and heavy, and full of fire. There was no other girl in the world I’d rather be with, and she deserved to hear how I felt. “I love you, too, Lea,” I whispered. “I have for a long time.”
LEA
“You guys said the l-word?” Taylor asked mid-bite at lunch the next day.
“Mm-hmm.” It came out all low and raspy, and there was no way of describing how good it felt to be Cory Griffin’s unofficial-official girlfriend. I popped a strawberry into my mouth and my blood warmed just thinking about it. I couldn’t stop reliving the way he’d said it since we’d split paths last night. I had it on a loop in my mind, and aside from the downer news about my solo career turning duo, I could honestly say this was the best week of my life.
Aside from the l-word news, I’d told Taylor everything about what happened with Genevieve too. She was as peeved as I was about the whole thing. We decided to call it The Mega Deception. Tay wanted to go find Genevieve and tell her how bad the idea was, but I’d stopped her. Cory was right. God had given me this voice for a reason, and signing with the label meant I’d still be using it for Him. I just had to decide if I could put up with The King as my co-lead for longer than the hour rehearsals I’d barely been making it through so far. My skin itched just thinking about it.
“I’m so happy for you, girl.” Tay wiggled her brows at me, sitting back in her chair, studying me with a glint in her eyes, and bringing my thoughts back around to Cory.
Ah, Cory . . . Cory, Cory, Cory, Cory.
“Isn’t it the best feeling in the world?” she asked.
“I’ve been going through a million of them. Which one are you talking about?”
“The in-love glow, girl.” She gave a little, “whoop, whoop,” and bobbed her shoulders. The in-love glow she was talking about more than radiated off her own smile. She and Ryan were back together and making plans for transferring to the same school in the fall.
I couldn’t stop my goofy grin, but I didn’t care. I’d wear it proudly if it meant everyone knew I was with Cory. Well . . . not yet. But in the matter of two days, I’d make sure that every girl in sight knew the hot fishing-tour guide they were all whispering about was with yours truly.
“We prayed together, too,” I added, wiggling my brows.
“Why are you wiggling your brows? That’s weird.”
“I never knew how smoldering praying with a guy you care about feels.”
“I hope you guys stayed a Bible’s width apart.”
“You sound like a granny.”
“Grannies rock, so thank you.”
“Yeah. And like you and Ry were a Bible’s width apart on that zip line the other night.”
“We had onlookers.”
“Anyway. I was thinking of asking him to be my date to the reveal dinner after the competition tonight. Do you think it’s too risky?”
“Aren’t you going with Kyle?”
I grunted.
“Did you just grunt?”
“Too Cory-ish?”
Taylor busted up laughing and shook her head. “If you start wearing waders, I’ll know you’re beyond help.”
“Don’t tempt me.” I closed my eyes, remembering the way those suspenders framed Cory’s wide shoulders so beautifully.
“Daydreaming about me again, I see.” Of all the voices present at camp, that one had to be the worst voice to break up my thoughts about Cory.
“What do you want?” I turned my attention back to my breakfast, stabbing my bacon with my fork and sawing it with my knife. One glance at Taylor told me she was just as irritated as I was by Kyle.
“Just came to see the better half of the smokin’ new band, Have Mercy.”
“Have Mercy?”
He shrugged. “They’re going over names. That was one of the choices circulating.”
“First off, ew. That’s so not the name, and second, when did she tell you?”
“Right now. Tell me you’re in.” He crossed his fingers and closed his eyes, lifting his face to the heavens like a little kid who’d asked for a crazy cool bike for Christmas and was about to open a package big enough to be the exact same one.
I grunted again.
By the way, I could get used to this whole grunting thing. It was way better than having to come up with a good zinger on the fly. Not that it would take me longer than two seconds to come up with one for Kyle. Gah! I couldn’t believe I was actually contemplating going on tour with this guy.
He peeked an eye open and stared at me. “You’re not saying anything.”
I took a deep breath and glanced at Taylor. “I was thinking about working on my solo by the lake in a minute. Want to come?”
“You know it.”
I stood, so did she, and Kyle groaned, following behind us as we made our exit.
“Come on, Lea. Why would you even think about hesitating?” he asked.
“Oh, I don’t know, Kyle. Maybe because you’re a grade-A jerk with a fetish for ruining my life.”
“What? You’re joking, right? Lea. I adore you. You’re like the hot little sidekick I’ve always wanted.”
“Ew. He didn’t,” Taylor muttered.
“Right?” My skin crawled. We made our way toward the lake, and I spotted Cory out in a rowboat with a couple campers. My heart stuttered, and my lips buzzed with the ghost of his, and I knew what I had to do. For him. For me. For every single fan that would’ve come to a concert hoping to get something genuine out of it. I stopped in my tracks, Kyle skidding to a halt behind me. I turned to face him and shoved a thumb backward over my shoulder. “See that guy out there?”
He sighed. “Oh, what? The fishing hick? You’ll never make it with a guy like that.”
“That guy’s a freaking man, Kyle. And there’s no way in Hades I’m missing out on time with him so I can go tour the world with your fake butt.”
He sucked a sharp breath. “Officially offended. Why would you say I’m fake?”
I waved a hand from his head to his toes, frowning. “You don’t give two cents about Jesus. You never have. But you always play the part so you can get in the spotlight. Are you talented? Super. But you’re out here for yourself, and maybe the record label can’t see that. I mean, your acting skills are beyond amazing. But I see straight through it. And I’m not spending a second of my career with a total hypocrite.”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“No? What about the whole ‘date me, Lea’ plan you had going? The one where we’d have better odds at a contract if we were together. Odds at what? Leading people’s hearts in worship, or getting a chance on the big stage? Guess what? As much as I used to care about the big stage, I care way more about being real now, and I can’t fake any part of standing in front of a crowd full of people who need hope. I was born to give it to them, and someday, I know I will, but not right now. Not like this. Sorry, not sorry. I’m out, Kyle.”
His jaw dropped.
Taylor’s eyes bulged in that panicky look she gave me whenever I was going off on another crazy rant, but I wasn’t crazy this time. Cory was right about my voice. God gave it to me. But He didn’t give it to me so I could waste it on trying to make it big with a guy who couldn’t care less about anyone else. He gave it to me to use it for Him. And that’s exactly what I was going to do at my performance tonight. Right before I announced my withdrawal from the competition.
“Lea, you might want to think about this,” Taylor said.
Kyle folded his arms across his chest. “Maybe she doesn’t need to. She’s right. I don’t care how I win, just as long as I do.” Something weird passed through his eyes. He almost looked haunted.
“Congratulations, then, Kyle. For whatever reason, they decided it’s the both of us, or it’s just you. Hope you enj
oy it. But more than that, I’ll be praying you realize how huge of a deal it is to be able to bring light to aching souls. That you’ll turn your heart to what’s real and stop worrying so much about yourself.”
He shrugged, toed the ground, and held my gaze. “You’re crazy, Lea, and yeah, I’m good on my own, but we’re better together, and you know it. I hope you realize how dumb you’re being before the competition.”
Fifteen
CORY
“She’s doing what?”
Taylor stood in front of me, breaths pounding and sweat trickling down her cheek, probably from her run around the lake to hunt me down. “She went to find Genevieve. She’s pulling out of the competition.”
I was out with a couple campers, and I really didn’t have the freedom to leave my post and put Lea to rights again. That girl was a loose canon. I’d always known it, but I’d never expected her to go to this kind of an extreme. “Did she say why?”
“She called Kyle a fake, and said she wasn’t risking time with you to spend time with him. She said she didn’t care about the big stage anymore.” Taylor worried her bottom lip and huffed a breath. “Aren’t you going to stop her?”
The girls in the back of my boat giggled and whispered back and forth.
I grunted. “This is a really bad time.” I glanced at the campers and back to Taylor. “An obvious bad time.” Hopefully, she picked up on my word choice. Even if I’d give my left leg to stop Lea from ruining her future, doing that right now could mean exposing us, and exposing us would mean a trip to Pastor Gregg’s office, and a trip to Pastor Gregg’s office would mean the end of my work up here.
I couldn’t afford to lose this job. Not financially, and definitely not where the Navy was concerned. Getting canned over dating a camper would probably be the worst possible choice I could make right about now.
“You have to stop her, Cory. She’s about to ruin everything she’s worked her whole life to get, and she’ll never have a chance like this again.”
Falling In Hard: Book Four in The Bridgeport Lake Summer Series Page 13