His unexpected hesitation has me second-guessing myself. But I don’t see the harm. It’s a gesture, a kind one at that. How much could Dominic possibly resent it? Within a few knocks she answers, but I can tell it was a struggle for her to get to the door. Her hair is a braided mess over her shoulder, black half-moons of sickness lay prominently beneath her eyes. She stands in a pale blue robe and matching pajamas, her gaze filled with clear accusation when she darts them to me.
“I had my treatment last night,” she snaps, her tone laced with embarrassment, as she pulls her robe more tightly around her. “I don’t need a ride.”
“Hey, Delphine,” Tyler greets as she drinks him in slowly before eyeing the dozen or so plastic bags in his hands.
“What are you doing here?”
Tyler remains mute, looking her over carefully before lowering his gaze. He seems at a loss for words, so I speak up on our behalf.
“Here to see you, we were just at the store and—”
She slices her hand in the air, effectively cutting me off, her unforgiving gaze on Tyler before rolling back to me. “I need nothing.”
“You need this,” I say softly. “And if you don’t, I do. So, please let us in.”
After a painful silence, she takes a reluctant step back just enough to let us through. Tyler carries the bulk of the load through the living room, setting the bags on the counter. He’s no stranger to this house. When I think about it, it’s no surprise, Dominic grew up here. Tyler told me during our hood errands that he grew up with Dominic and Sean in the same neighborhood, that they played together as kids. His childhood home is a few streets over from hers, which is why I asked him to help me today. I knew he would know the way.
Sean would’ve probably tried to talk me out of it, so I went with the safest option. And I’m happy about my choice as a bold roach crawls over the lip of the bag I just unpacked. I jerk back before smashing it with a can of bug spray. Delphine joins us in the kitchen as I shudder and shove the empty bag into the trash. Tyler remains mute, unpacking the rest of the bags, tension rolling off his shoulders. Delphine views me with speculation as I strategically stack dinners in her freezer.
“This will not earn you any points with my nephew.” She speaks from behind me, her French tongue laced with disdain.
“Then let’s not mention it to him,” I reply. I’m not insulted by her assumption. I can only imagine how many women she’s chased off over the years. But it’s not Dominic I’m the most concerned about at the moment. Tyler either, although he seems pretty ill at ease. I might have asked too much from him.
Delphine hovers in her kitchen, her focus drifting between the two of us, but I can tell her defiant stance is taking some effort as a thin veil of sweat starts to coat her translucent skin.
“Or maybe it’s not my nephew you’re fucking?”
Tyler snaps his head her way, and I lift my hand.
“No, it most definitely is your nephew I’m fucking.”
Her eyes drift over my shoulder to Tyler, who seems surprised by her reaction to us. She shakes her head and walks out of the kitchen as we share a weary glance before we resume our work.
Once we’ve fully unpacked, we divide to conquer. I start in her bedroom, filling a trash bag full of junk under her eagle-eyed scrutiny before I gather my arsenal of cleaners. I’m halfway into scrubbing out a carpet stain that looks like a lost cause when she sounds up behind me.
“Why are you here?”
I decide to give her a dose of Alfred Sean Roberts honesty. Something tells me she’ll appreciate it a lot more. I glance over my shoulder and meet her assessing eyes. “Because I don’t like the state you’re living in. You’re not well. You’re fighting a sickness while allowing yourself to live in an infested house.”
“Who are you to criticize me?”
“No one of authority.” I stand and face her fully. She’s so thin I can see the deep purple vein in her neck. Chemo has taken a scary toll since the last time I saw her. “You can tell me to leave, Delphine. And I will.”
She crosses her arms, her thin robe accentuating her gaunt figure. “I’m doing what I’m supposed to. I’ve taken my meds.”
“I’m not here to police you.” Simple, honest, to the point. The woman can smell bullshit from a mile away.
“Fine,” she flips her hand. “Do what you will.”
“Thank you.” She frowns at my reply and turns on shaky legs, walking back toward the living room.
I resume my scrubbing as the house remains quiet and the tension builds. She finally speaks up, calling out to Tyler who’s working his way through her kitchen. I hear the distinct clink of a bottle to glass where she speaks from her chair.
“Never thought I’d see you again. Are you still a traitor?”
“If you mean a Marine, then yes,” he replies, clear mirth in his voice. “You haven’t forgiven me yet?”
“No.”
“Maybe if I get these dishes sparkling, you’ll forgive me.”
“Those dishes are older than you. They no longer sparkle.”
“Well, you certainly know how to keep hold of things that aren’t worth a shit.”
My ears perk at his comment.
“You wear both tattoos like badges of honor, but which house do you really serve?”
“This house, today,” he replies without pause. “And I explained to you a long time ago I wanted to serve both.”
She huffs, indignant. “They are not one and the same. They’re contradictions of the other.”
“That’s what we’re trying to change.”
“You know better.”
“I refuse to give up, and you have no place lecturing anyone on that.”
I can feel the tension his scorn causes. The house goes silent again as I make my way toward the bedroom door and peek out, seeing just enough of Tyler as he kneels down in front of her. I’m too far away, but I swear I catch her features soften as he whispers to her from feet away.
“I’m sorry I haven’t been back.”
He pulls the drink from her hand and sets it on the table. Tentatively, she reaches out and palms his cheek, and he covers it with his own.
“I had high hopes for you.” She pulls her hand away, and he sighs.
“Keep them high, along with your expectations, but you have to live to see me meet them. What in the hell have you done to yourself, Delphine?”
She leans in on a whisper, her eyes finding mine over his shoulder before I jump back into the bedroom and head toward the bathroom to finish my task.
So, Delphine is in on the secret.
Interesting.
But I’ll never be able to use this to my advantage. She’s just as closed off as Dominic. I’m not enough of a crowbar to try and breach her barriers. I know this without even trying.
After spending endless minutes scrubbing her bathroom and setting out roach bait in every corner, along all the baseboards, and in her closets, I move to join them in the living room. Tyler’s clearing a thick layer of dust from one of her floating shelves. “How do you breathe in here, Delphine?”
She lifts her vodka bottle and pours an inch into her glass. “Breathing is overrated.”
He shakes his head and peers down on her, his voice full of authority. “Stubborn ass woman.”
“Careful, have some respect for your first crush,” she says softly.
He tilts his head, his eyes brimming with affection until she averts her gaze.
“Bet you never thought I would end up like this.”
“I have no pity for you,” he clips, “the woman I knew would fight this shit with her eyes closed. You are choosing this.”
“I chose the wrong man.” Her lips curl into a sad smile as she takes another sip. “You fight this for four years and then come lecture me about it. Cancer is very much like a cockroach. They always come back to the one who hosts them best.”
“First of all, he was a piece of shit,” Tyler supplies, a sharp edge to his voice. “An
d secondly—” He stops berating her when I walk into the room.
“By all means, carry on,” I gesture, “I heard every word.”
Delphine laughs, lifts her glass, and drains more vodka. She doesn’t even look phased by the alcohol. Clearly, she’s earned her tenure as a drunk. After a long swallow, she nods toward me. “I like this one.”
“She’s fond of you too. Don’t know why.”
“Sure, you don’t.” She smirks, and I see the subtle upturn of his lips. The air grows thick again and I get an inkling, and study them collectively.
“All done in there, Cee?” His eyes drift from me to Delphine and back again.
“Yeah.” I bob my head.
Tyler resumes his cleaning as I cross the living room to inspect his job on the kitchen. It’s sparkling and reeks of lemon disinfectant—Marine clean. Enough to eat off the floor.
Even if she doesn’t appreciate it, I’ll sleep better, selfish as it may be. I’m thinking Tyler will be sleeping better as well. He clearly has affection for her. I just can’t understand why Dominic wouldn’t try to do this for her himself.
Maybe he has, and gave up like she did.
Dom’s home is always spotless, and his room is as well. That she lives this way by choice is what’s so hard to accept.
Satisfied with our job, I write down an inventory of the groceries we bought for quick reference and leave the list on the counter for her. Delphine’s draining another drink when I reach her. Her Bible open on her lap before she lifts her eyes to mine. Her expression is full of hope.
I fight the emotion budding in my chest and manage to school my features as Tyler wipes the debris off the window ledge next to her. He reads the situation and glances back at the two of us in a stare off before he tosses the rag over his shoulder.
“I’m going to hit the other two rooms.” He excuses himself, his gaze lingering on Delphine before he disappears down the hall.
However, it’s Dominic’s aunt who keeps me captive because the fear in her eyes is real, and it makes me just as fearful for her.
Despite her flippant comments, she’s afraid to die.
If only that quack were real. The one who has proof of His existence, then she wouldn’t be so scared to take the journey. But all she has is faith. All she needs is to keep the faith of the book in her hands. And that has to be enough. This point right here is when faith becomes her burden and possible breaking point. I might have needed to sterilize her environment to feel better about her situation, but what she truly needs isn’t in plastic bags.
She doesn’t bother to ask, and she doesn’t have to. I kneel next to her as she flips through the pages and begins to read.
Back in Tyler’s truck, we collectively stare at the house. She’d thanked us and hugged Tyler for several seconds before she’d given me a slight smile and closed her door. I eye the plants on her porch as he turns the engine over.
“Shit, I forgot to water her porch plants.”
“You’ve done enough.” His whisper is covered in melancholy. I could have asked for directions because I’d forgotten the way, but I needed back-up. It’s a hard situation to deal with, especially letting a stranger in, and I needed that familiarity from Tyler to get through her door. But even with him there, it was still hard, and it’s just as hard now leaving her alone to waste away in that house, especially knowing how scared she is. She may have chosen to stop fighting and die alone, but she doesn’t want to be alone when she gets there.
“She needs to believe,” I look him over. “She’s terrified.”
“I know.” He turns and meets my gaze. “Do you believe in all that shit y’all were talking about?”
“I want to. And if I were told I might die, I damn sure would be praying for my salvation every day. I guess that makes me a hypocrite when it comes to religion. I am because I’m only faithful when it’s convenient.”
His nod is solemn as he peers back toward the house as we continue to idle. “She’s changed a lot, but I can still see her in there.” A reminiscing smile tickles his lips. “And you will never be the heathen she was.”
“You know I have secrets of my own.” I swallow and brave a glance his way. I see no judgment, which only endears him to me. He squeezes my knee briefly and winks.
“You’ve been corrupted.”
“Willingly corrupted.”
“You are good people, Cecelia.” His eyes drift back to the house. “Dominic’s tried for years to get her to start living right. They—” He clears his throat and darts his gaze away, “tried.” He’s in pain. Real pain. And that’s when I know I was right. His eyes light up when he speaks. “You might not see it now from the shape she’s in, but eight years ago, she was one of the most beautiful fucking women to walk this Earth. Her ex ruined her, and she let him.”
“She wasn’t just a crush, was she?”
He slowly shakes his head. “I was comfort for her, but she’s the one who crushed me. Despite being a punk-ass eighteen-year-old, I knew I loved her. He’d left her years before we hooked up. She was already heavy on the bottle and when she sobered up, she made it clear to me I was a mistake. I enlisted right after.”
“Oh my God, Tyler, I’m so sorry.”
He wipes his hand over his face. “It was never going to work anyway. The military was always my plan, and she was too far gone by the time we happened. I—” He shrugs, though I know the weight on his shoulders is too heavy to shake away. “Can’t help who you fall for, right?”
“Ain’t that the truth.” I study his stark profile. “Did Dom know?”
“No. No one. You’re the only one I’ve ever told. And she…well, she’ll take it to her grave. She’s the best at keeping secrets. Better than any one of us.” He takes one more look at the house before pulling out of the driveway. “She was only twenty when she…became a reluctant parent.”
My age. I can’t imagine.
“But she did what she could. The irony is it’s her ovaries killing her anyway. One big life fuck you. I wouldn’t have given a damn about her age, then or now, if she would have let me in. Fuck, I hate seeing her like this.”
I cover his hand on the seat with mine. “I’m sorry I dragged you into this. If I would have known, I never would have asked you.”
“No, I’m glad you did. I thought it was best to stay away, but now that I’ve seen her…I know better. I’ll do better and I won’t let her suffer alone anymore. She dismissed us and broke my fucking heart, and then I turned around and gave up on her in return. The eighteen-year-old me didn’t understand it. I do now.” I study his profile as he drives us out of the neighborhood.
“You still love her.”
He nods. “I have since I was sixteen. But Cee, this is our secret to keep.”
“I will. I swear to you, Tyler. Thank you for trusting me with it.”
Silence follows and I know he’s hurting—I can feel it pouring from him. Even after all these years, even in her wretched state, he still loves her.
For the first time in my life, I don’t see the beauty in tragedy. I see the cruelty of it. He drives on, silent and reflective, the whole way back to the shopping center, only addressing me when he turns into the parking lot. He grins, shaking his head ironically. “Life is crazy, isn’t it?”
“Never know where a day can bring you, especially around here,” I repeat his words from the day we met. “You okay?”
“I’m good. Swear.” The light in his eyes returns briefly, along with a peek of his dimple. “And I’m here for any favor you need, Cee. I’ve got your back.”
“Same, Tyler, same.”
“YOU ARE ONE LUCKY BITCH.” I palm my stomach, admiring the snug fit of the dress I bought specifically for tonight. I spent half of another shitty paycheck just to see that shop owner, Tessa, light up. It was a reward in itself. It’s a dangling two-piece, a halter that shows a little side boob, along with a flowing black skirt. It’s a little risqué, and I decide Dominic will love it. The occasion is speci
al. It’s for our first date.
A real date.
His idea.
If that isn’t evidence of progression, I don’t know what is. I try not to question anymore the why of the three of us.
For the life of me, I can’t understand why these two gorgeous guys with so much to offer have settled on me. It can’t be just the sex, because I’ve seen for myself just how capable they are of getting any woman within a five-mile radius. I want to believe that their interest is genuine, that they truly do respect me and are okay with this arrangement because I can’t imagine having to choose between them. I get no grief in return for this tradeoff, absolutely none.
My rainy days with Dominic are scarce because he stays so busy with running the garage and with hood business, sometimes I have to wait days just to lay eyes on him. That’s why tonight is so special, and I’m soaking up every minute because there’s an inkling inside of me that reminds me one day this will all end—whether it be the day that I leave Triple Falls for college or whether they leave me for someone else.
I rarely let my mind go there because just the thought of it ruins me.
My dreams are filled with them, riddled with them every night. Lately, I’ve been brushing up on my French with a new app, and Dominic sometimes entertains me when we’re together, though he’s rusty himself, the moody Frenchman.
But he does, they both do, they indulge me, and they’ve allowed me this time to be selfish, and it’s been the best summer of my life.
So tonight, I’m going to try like hell to live in the now.
The unmistakable sound of his Camaro tearing down the drive has me smiling as I survey my appearance one last time. Today had been especially hot, but I left my hair down because he likes it this way, constantly pulling the hair ties out when I have it up and throwing them in the trash. He isn’t a fan of makeup either, because he also tosses it when I leave it in his bathroom.
The motherfucker.
But there’s so much I love about Dominic. About the way he communicates with me without saying a word.
I can read him more easily now, gauge his moods, his dislikes, his preferences. Outside the bedroom, you wouldn’t know we are together. Inside the bedroom, he doesn’t go more than minutes without his hands and lips on me.
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