That someone was his woman.
She needed to understand what happened to her and she wasn’t able to grasp it. She was displacing it. Confusing it. Twisting it into something that made more sense to her. And of course thinking she was doped up in a mental ward would make more sense than what her reality really was. The moment he really focused on the piece of her soul he kept safe, Drake got it. He completely understood now.
He didn’t remember too much about going through the phases to become a Hell Hound, but he remembered surviving the transition and clinging to Baz like his twin was his only lifeline. Becoming a Hell Hound was fucking rough. After it had happened, Drake had been relieved, then he questioned everything because nothing felt the same. It took him a while to get right in his head again because of it too. And Baz went through a similar experience – going into denial, he’d freaked out at the end of his Merging Phase because he thought he’d been drugged by his owner again and none of it was real. Talk about a fucking rabbit hole to climb out of…
So yeah, Drake absolutely knew where Tilly was coming from. They all did in their own way. Cynics lived by the motto: If it was too good to be true, then it’s too good and most likely wasn’t true. Tilly was just like the rest of the pack.
Fuck, Drake needed to fix this pronto. He needed to put her pieces back together so she could understand what happened and accept it.
Drake cradled Tilly’s face in his hands, “Look at me,” he ordered. “That pain you felt was your merging. It’s the last of your human pieces breaking up and morphing you into a Hell Hound. Your senses would have been stripped. You had to gain them all back one by one. Did that happen?”
She nodded frantically, still clinging to him.
“Now, not everyone makes it, Tilly. Not everyone survives the last phase. You weren’t doing well and we all pushed our energy into you. You feel that?” He stepped closer and smashed their chests together. “We got one heartbeat now.”
She gasped. “Oh my god.”
“We all bonded. When we almost lost you, we… I don’t know what the fuck we did, but we did something incredible. And I feel you, even more now that I did before. Can you feel me?”
Her brow furrowed and she tried to concentrate. When she closed her eyes, Drake could feel her trying to put her faith in his words.
“Find me,” he whispered. “Focus and find me inside you.”
Calming her nerves down long enough to focus, Tilly tried to seek Drake out from within her. He was there, like a stone under a constant pummel of water, much like this waterfall.
Drake’s voice tickled her ear, “Feel for Valor now. Find your alpha.”
Tilly kept her eyes closed and tried to find –
There he was. Her alpha. Valor felt like a warm ember in her chest.
“Baz,” she murmured.
“Find him,” Drake laced his fingers with hers and kept her pressed close to him. Tilly concentrated and there Sebastian was, like a raging current just under her skin.
“Good girl. Now Bishop,” Drake nodded, “Find Bishop, Hound.”
Tilly found him almost too easily. With a long exhale, there was Bishop, a simmering volcano so deep inside her bones, her marrow warmed. “Oh my god. How is this possible?”
“I don’t know,” Drake kissed the top of her head. “But you did this, and I mean it in the best way possible. I’m not trying to sound like an assholey fuckaroo, Tilly. You’ve bound this pack in a way that’s only been done with one other.”
“Sara’s?”
“Mmm hmm.”
“So this is really all real. I made it. I’m a true Hell Hound?”
“Full blooded and fully fucking mated.”
Her eyes bulged, “Mated?”
Drake smiled down at her for a hot minute. “There’s no one else for us. It’s you. It’s always been you, woman.”
“We’re mates?”
“We’re pack,” he nodded. “And yeah, you’re my mate. You’re Sebastian’s, Val’s and Bishop’s mate too.” He lifted an eyebrow and glared. “You thinking of leaving this pack now that we’ve all shared you?”
“No, I don’t want out. I wanted this all along.”
“I know.” Drake kissed her head again and ran his hands up and down her back. “We found your letter to Val.”
Relief outshined her other emotions. This was real. All of this was one hundred percent real. And she was finally going to be okay. “Thank you for talking me through this.”
“Yeah, well. I learned talking things out is better than keeping shit in.”
Tilly grinned and dipped her head down.
“Hey,” Drake lifted her chin, “Never look down.”
She exhaled and rounded her shoulder. “Never look down. I remember.”
“Good. Now, you ready to go back out there?”
Tilly nodded and followed Drake out from behind the waterfall. The rest of the pack waited for her to approach them. “Sorry about that,” she blushed. “I… can’t seem to hold onto reality for very long, I guess.”
“It’s understandable, lass. We feared this whole situation was a dream ourselves.” Valor swam over and wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her out of the water. “But this is our life now. Are ye happy about it?”
Tilly was shocked stupid for a second because she could feel each of them in her, all warming her up from the inside out. Valor shook her a little bit to rattle her out of her thoughts. “Well, mo leannan? Your alpha asked ye a question. Are ye happy with this pack or not?”
Tilly answered as best she could.
With a howl.
They swam for about an hour. The water felt good on her skin. Everything that touched her felt amazing, actually. When the sun broke through the starry sky, the pack headed back in.
Valor went into his office with Drake, Bishop went upstairs to do something “real quick” and Sebastian started doing the dishes that had piled in the sink for who knows how long.
“You wash, I’ll dry?” Tilly smiled.
Baz handed her a plate. They didn’t speak for a few minutes, then he finally said, “You got us all together.”
“Drake explained the bond to me. Well, as best as he could, I guess.”
“Yeah, but that’s not what I mean. I’m talking about earlier, upstairs.”
She dried that next plate extra good. Had she accidentally forced them to do something sexually they didn’t want to do? “Are you… okay about that?”
Baz smiled while washing the next plate. “Yeah, I am. I think you crossed all our lines and washed them away like waves over sand. Bishop’s never come at me like that before.”
“Hot, by the way. That was so fucking hot.” Just thinking about the two of them licking Sebastian’s cock had her wet again. Her nipples hardened immediately. To distract herself, Tilly dried the already dry plate.
Baz dropped a fork in the sink and had to fish around in the soapy water for it. Apparently she wasn’t the only one affected by that sexy memory. “Me and D,” he cleared his throat, “We’ve never… shared.”
“You guys are good at sharing.”
“We’re good at sharing you,” he corrected. “Sex with us isn’t easy. For anyone. But… you make it feel like breathing air. Natural. Essential.”
“Is that code for mind blowing? Because I’m pretty sure that’s what that was up there.”
Sebastian laughed and shook his head while he handed her the fork. “Agreed.”
“So are you saying you’d do it again?” Please, please, please.
“Are you offering?”
“Open invitation, Hound. All day, all night, forever.”
Sebastian grabbed the towel from her hand and tossed it on the counter. “I do have one bone to pick with you though, Tills.”
“What’s that?” She put her hands on her hips and waited for his response. How come standing naked in the kitchen doing dishes didn’t feel weirder? This felt totally natural.
“You didn’t give me a tur
n,” Sebastian’s playful smile lit up the kitchen. He practically prowled closer to her. Placing a hand around her neck, he kissed her like a hungry beast and backed her up, maneuvering the two of them around the kitchen until her ass hit the table. Then he spun her around, spread her thighs and bent her over. “Damn, woman, I love you so much.” He ran his hands down her back and she lit up from the inside out.
When he pushed into her, Tilly cried out and then shoved back to get more of him.
“Fuck, Tills.”
“Tryin’ to, Hound.” Tilly stretched her body as much as possible and kept her ass up, legs spread, pussy exposed, and she grabbed the edge of the table. “Fuck me like you own me, Hound.”
Baz needed dominance and she’d gladly give it to him. She’d give every Hound in her pack exactly what they needed, when they needed it, and she knew damn well they’d do the same for her.
They were in this life together now. Forever. And nothing was going to break them apart.
Chapter 33
Valor sat at his big, carved wooden desk and glowered at his computer screen. When Tilly stepped into the room with a glass of fine Scottish whisky, he clicked out of his emails and leaned back in his chair. “Come here, lass.” He patted his lap.
While she and Sebastian gave the kitchen table a work out, Valor had gone upstairs to put on some clothes. Tilly, however, was still decked out in her finest outfit.
Skin.
When Tilly obeyed and sat on his lap, Valor inhaled the perfume of woman, pack and sex. He swallowed his groan and kept his lust under control. They needed to discuss something important, so he needed to stay focused. “How do ye feel now?”
“Better,” she tucked her hair behind her ears, “Drake explained that we’ve bonded. That you all pushed your energy into me.”
“We did.”
“Was I really dying?”
“Ye were,” he rubbed her back because he needed to touch her. “I’ve a gift, lass. One I doona use often because the cost is great. After my Merging, I discovered I had the gift of life.” She turned so she could look at him while he explained, “I doona ken why I was given such a power, but I doona like to use it unless I have no other choice. I felt that with ye. I could see ye struggling, your aura was fading and I panicked. The others did too. We all grabbed ye, like if we held on tight enough, we’d not loose ye again.”
She gulped.
“The night Drake found your body in the woods, I was too late to save ye. Your soul was already gone. The level of despair was too deep to breathe through that night... for all of us.” He felt her skin heat and could tell she was growing upset, but he needed to say this. “I think had we not been given a second chance with ye, this pack would be lost. We would have never survived our grief.” He leaned back in his chair with a sigh. “Ye said that when ye died, ye had no intentions of trading your soul. Yet ye did. In the end, ye came back to us.”
She nodded.
“I ken we still have much to learn about each other, Tilly, but ye must understand that this pack is everything to me. I’ve never truly loved before. Not until I got my Hounds. And then ye came into our lives and turned it all around. Ye never tried to change a single one of us. Ye took us as we were, faults and all. Ye were pack long before ye died, mo leannan.”
He pulled out the letter she’d left him. “Bishop and Drake found this.” Valor carefully opened it and laid it on the desk. Tears pricked her eyes as Tilly read her note. She’d written it three weeks before she died.
Running her hand over her letter, she said, “I never belonged anywhere until I came here. Never belonged to anyone until I found you guys.”
“We understand, our own stories are much the same.”
“I can’t tell if I’m grateful to have died or not. I’m not happy with how it happened, but… the ending was way happier than I probably deserved.”
“Ye deserve only the best of what this world has to offer, lass.” Valor kissed the top of her shoulder. He needed to approach this cautiously. “Ye ken who murdered ye.”
She nodded.
They all did. Pascale. Valor already ran the name through several databases trying to find Pascale’s location, but hadn’t been successful yet. No last name made it more difficult, but there hadn’t been time to bring it up again. They only knew the name because Tilly mentioned it during her Haunting. She wouldn’t remember saying it though.
“When I was lost in the dark, during The Merging,” Tilly tucked her hair behind her ears again, “I grabbed onto the thought of revenge. I’d have sunk my teeth into it if it was possible. I latched onto the victory of staring her in the face and getting even.” She frowned and looked up at Val, “Does that make me a bad person?”
“It makes ye human.”
“But I’m not human anymore.”
“Our moral compass is still intact, mo leannan. We’re righteous creatures. Sometimes lines are blurred between revenge and righteousness.” He cleared his dry throat. “Do ye still desire it?”
“To kill her?”
Valor nodded.
“I want to say yes, but I can’t. I feel like… I just want closure. I want to know why. It doesn’t make sense. We weren’t friends, but we certainly weren’t enemies. She was so cold and cruel and—” Tilly burst into tears. “I just don’t understand why she’d betray me like that.”
Valor knew much about betrayal. After all, look how his brother killed him and all of Valor’s clan. When Valor got a second chance at life, he never went back to get revenge. He put his faith in karma serving justice to Mackenzie. His purpose on earth wasn’t to go after a human monster with an expiration date. His duty was to help Satan keep the balance between good and evil.
Immortality did wondrous things to time. It sped it up, made it irrelevant, and overshadowed the past. Eventually, Valor stopped wondering about his brother because the bastard was dead and buried and was most certainly in Hell’s prisons. Valor never went to check on him to make sure either. There was no need. In this, Valor put all his faith in Lucifer and never second guessed the fact that Mackenzie would rot in Hell for all he’d done.
“What would you do, Alpha?”
Her voice snapped Val back to attention. “It’s not up to me, lass. If ye want it, go get it. If ye think ye can move past this, then do that instead. Whatever ye decide, I’ll support ye.” He knew the pack would be disappointed though. As males, they wanted to rip the throats out of whoever hurt their woman. As Hell Hounds, that murdering piece of shit deserved to be taken out because it could be classified as protecting the living. You didn’t have to be a malanum to still be evil. “Bishop and I never went back to seek revenge for our deaths. But ye ken verra well what the twins did.” The twins razed their entire town. Wiped it away from the world in a blast of Hell’s fury.
“I want it. I need to do this.”
Valor’s heart sank. “So be it.”
Chapter 34
They arrived in Paris by lunch time. Jack and Tanner greeted them since they’d taken over for the Paris pack who were still in Hell.
“How’s Asher doing?”
“No better, no worse, I think,” Tanner stuffed his hands in his back pockets.
“Bloody hell,” Jack cracked his neck, “I feel like we’re chasing our tails all day and night. Why isn’t Lucifer doing more?”
“What more is he supposed to do, Hound?” Valor’s long gait matched Jack’s, “He’s stuck and his brothers haven’t taken over. He’s weakening.”
“And we’re on a revenge kick,” Tanner murmured. He flinched and looked over at Tilly quick, “No offense. I get it. I’d go back and kill my stepfather all over again if it was me. Fortunately, we died together the first time around.”
“So he’s in Hell?” Tilly asked.
“Most likely.”
“You never checked?”
“Fuck no. I put all my faith into fate. Fate wouldn’t let me down. Never has before.” Tanner rubbed his chest, “Fuck, I miss Beautiful. Af
ter this, we’re switching with Kalen and Eli. We need time with her.”
“Agreed,” Jack practically growled. “Valor, I’ve been meaning to ask, have you talked to Chloe at all?”
“Aye.”
“Who’s Chloe?” Tilly still didn’t know and didn’t bother hiding her sudden jealousy. She was possessive of her pack.
Valor’s grin went a mile wide when he saw Tilly’s face burn with jealousy. “She’s a Medium, lass. She’s the one who sent us to all the places we ended up seeing ye while we searched for the twins.”
“Oh,” Tilly bit her bottom lip.
“And no, we never fucked her,” Drake answered the unasked question perched on the tip of her tongue.
Tilly waved his answer off like she didn’t really care about that. It wasn’t like she could be mad if they had. What they did before she came along didn’t matter now. They weren’t even the same species back then, for crying out loud. Still, it didn’t make the possessiveness roaring in her go away. She just hoped they hadn’t noticed.
“That reminds me, what is a burning witch?” Valor took over the conversation and switched topics.
Jack slowed his roll. “Who’s asking?”
“There were twin girls with whoever took Drake and Sebastian and most likely Sara. One of them was at Tilly’s old house, holding onto a man dangling from a rope in the foyer.”
Jack stopped walking. “Bloody Hell. Did you tell Lucifer about this yet?”
“Haven’t seen him and then shit went crazy just after.” Valor rubbed the back of his neck. “Chloe possessed the child. Told us to run.”
“I don’t get it,” Drake frowned, “those girls were so young. One had her neck snapped right in front of us while we were in the catacombs. The other helped show us the way out of there.”
“She’s been popping up,” Bishop added. “I… I confused her with my Katie.”
“Fuck,” Tanner whispered. “I’m so sorry, Hound.”
“So what’s a burning witch?” Valor pressed again.
Hard to Kill (Hell Hounds Harem Book 6) Page 27