by Lee Wardlow
The Sherwood Series
Ben
Elijah’s story was sweet and filled with romance, right?
Mine started out that way then all hell broke loose.
Jasmine left our daughter with Elijah and Jenny. I became a single father. Me. The one who didn’t want the child in the first place but then I held hr in the hospital and fell in love with her. I muddled through single fatherhood with Seth’s help.
Then I saw Disa Riley at the store where I was buying supplies for Asia. Disa and I had a past that I had been running from for six years. She was the one that got away. I had tried running to Jasmine to escape the pain of losing Disa. Not my brightest idea. You see where that got me?
I wouldn’t change a thing though.
I kissed her. Drunk off my ass at Dad’s pub. I kissed Disa in the men’s restroom. What was she doing in there with me? You’ll have to read my story to find out. She had secrets though that would haunt our happiness.
My family did too. Secrets that had torn us apart six years ago. I was angry at their betrayal. It’s hard to stay angry when your Mom is kidnapped, and your vigilante brothers AJ and Heath have something to do with this hell you are living now. I just wanted to live an uncomplicated life. The Hatfield’s apparently don’t know how to do that.
Ben
The Sherwood Series
By
Lee Wardlow
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used factiously. Any resemblance to actual events, or persons living, or dead is coincidental. The suggestion or actual use of a business or place is used only to further the author’s story not to promote them.
Copyright © 2018 by Lee Wardlow. All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce, redistribute, or transmit in any form, paperback or digital or any other feasible means possible.
Dedication
My best friend Tammy who keeps pushing me when I want to quit. She picks me up when I’m sad. She’s like a sister to me. Best friends just doesn’t cut it.
I love you girl. That rocking chair is waiting for you. It’s been a rough one.
Chapter 1
This wasn’t the way to handle things, I knew but I couldn’t seem to stop myself right now, not while my head was a mess. I was surprised Dad was giving me the beer. If Seth drove me home, he was letting me wallow in alcohol while I tried to get my act together.
Six weeks had passed since I had held my daughter in my hands. I was one miserable son-of-a-bitch. I wanted to be a father to her but I still resented Jasmine and that woman’s lies. I also felt like she tricked me, but it wasn’t Asia’s fault. I wanted my daughter.
I needed to piss in the worst way. I staggered to the bathroom and let the door slam shut behind me. I unzipped my jeans and stood at the urinal barely able to stand up let alone hold my dick.
The bathroom door opened. I glanced over my shoulder expecting another man to walk through that door. Instead it was her.
“What the fuck,” I growled at her.
She laid her tray on the counter. I had my dick out of my pants, peeing in the urinal. I couldn’t have stopped if I tried. She didn’t seem to care or notice. “Disa, do you mind? I’m taking a piss.” My eyes were bloodshot and bleary but even I could see that she wasn’t leaving.
“I get that,” she replied. “I just needed to say that I’m ashamed of you, Benjamin.”
I lowered my head. “I already knew that,” I whispered looking at my penis. The thing that got me into this mess but damn, did I want to see my little girl again. I shook it off and shoved it back in my pants then I tried to zip my jeans. My boxers were stuck. “I need your help,” I slurred.
“You have got to be kidding me.”
“My boxers are stuck in the zipper,” I told Disa trying like hell to get them unstuck and only making it worse.
She sighed. “Come here,” she snapped at me.
Disa bent at the waist causing her hair to spill over her shoulder as she tried to pry the fabric loose from the zipper without touching me. If I hadn’t been so drunk I would probably be hard right now.
I sniffed her silver, blonde hair and closed my eyes reveling in the sweet smell of her silky locks. Damn, she smelled good like sweetness and sunshine mixed together. She reminded me of the honeysuckle that grew behind the farmhouse where Elijah and Jenny now lived.
“Ben, how can you turn your back on that little baby?” Disa asked me while she struggled with my zipper.
I sighed, a deep and heavy sound between us. “I want to see her.” I replied choking on the words.
Slowly, Disa’s head shot up to look at me. Her eyes were filled surprise. “Why don’t you then?” She asked.
“Jasmine,” I replied.
She lowered those beautiful baby blues back to the task at hand. Those amazing eyes of hers. Drunk or not, I saw the hurt. I touched her chin and through blearing eyes I saw the need in her face that my touch caused her. She wanted me to kiss her as much as I wanted to kiss her.
I lowered my head. My lips hovered near hers. Her fingers dropped from my zipper. The only sound was that of our breathing in the empty bathroom as we stared at each other. It was late or early however you chose to view it. The pub was nearly empty, so no one was likely to come in here.
Our eyes locked on each other. Hovering. Deciding. Was this a good idea? Then, I brushed my lips across Disa’s, throwing caution to the wind.
“Ben,” she moaned into my mouth. “Ben,” Disa moaned my name again. Then she thought better of kissing me and shoved on me. I didn’t move at first. “Ben don’t.” She shoved me again. “You’re still thinking about my cousin.”
“When I said Jasmine…well, it’s not what you’re thinking,” I murmured.
“How do you know what I’m thinking?” She went to work again on getting the fabric out of my zipper. She brushed her fingers against my cock and we both gasped.
Those eyes, crystal blue and fringed by thick, dark lashes shot up to mine and I wanted to kiss her again, but I didn’t. I didn’t want to make Disa anymore uncomfortable than she was.
Disa stammered. “You shouldn’t be kissing me, is what I’m thinking when you just had a baby with my cousin.”
I sighed and shook my head. “I’m not sorry for kissing you, Disa.”
She sighed then she got the plaid fabric unstuck and zipped up my jeans. “Fix your belt. Fix your life. Stop, the weekend drinking binges, Ben. I’ve known you for a long time. This isn’t you,” she informed me.
I looped my belt through the buckle then I tightened it. “Who am I, Disa? I’m not a father but I want to be that little girl’s dad in the worst way.”
She laid her hand against my chest and I found it hard to breath. “Then do it,” she told me, her blue eyes blazed at me.
I slipped the end of the belt through the loop in my pants then I cupped her face between my palms. I stared at Disa. I needed to soak up everything about her features. Her tiny nose. Her full, luscious lips. Her eyes. Those amazing, wonderful, beautiful eyes.
I had let her go once because my father in no uncertain terms let me know that I was no good for a girl like Disa Riley. My own father had said that to me and like a fool I had listened to him.
I was twenty-two and she was twenty-one. Was I ready for a serious relationship? Probably not with just anyone but maybe with her? I would never know now because I had walked away and every day of my life that I saw her I had regretted it and I had to see her. Sherwood was a small town.
She had just stopped seeing a guy, we both knew from high school. I knew this because I kept tabs on Disa Riley. I laid my forehead against hers. “Why d
id you break it off with Kevin?” I asked.
“None of your business,” she declared trying to extricate herself from my embrace.
I backed Disa into the wall refusing to let her go. “Oh,” I mumbled against her lips sending a shiver up her spine. “I think it is my business. Tell me,” I urged her, letting my lips trail across her jaw to that sweet spot on her neck that made her groan every single time. Tonight, was no exception.
Her palms were flat against my chest but not shoving against me. Her eyes were focused on mine. “Ben, don’t,” she pleaded with me.
I kissed her sweet lips making her moan then I stepped back, and her hands dropped to her sides. I couldn’t look at her or I would tell her how I felt about her. I would tell Disa, she was the one that got away. That I regretted ending our relationship six years ago. I would tell her that I loved her still.
Chapter 2
“Elijah,” Jenny poked me. “Jeremiah is crying. I got up with him last.”
I rolled over, covered my eyes and winced. The sun was pelting me in the face. “That’s Asia,” I informed her.
“Oh,” she murmured. “I’m so tired. I thought it was Jeremiah.”
Our son had not been sleeping. Belly aches the doctor called colic had been keeping him up every night this week. I swear I could sleep on my feet. I’m surprised I hadn’t set fire to my pants with a welder.
Asia on the other hand slept like an angel. My brother had not seen her since that night at the hospital and our kids were six weeks old.
She continued to cry. I uncovered my eyes. Jasmine wasn’t getting her. “I’ll go check on her.”
“No, I’ll go.” I pushed Jenny back on the bed. She had gotten up with Jeremiah several times because our baby boy wanted no one, but his momma. Her boob the only thing that would sooth him.
I couldn’t blame him. I loved her boobs too. She rolled her eyes at me when I said that out loud. Jenny didn’t like it, so I didn’t say it out loud often, but I could think it.
She was more beautiful to me now that she was the mother of my son. I loved her more than I ever thought was possible.
I stumbled down the hall to Jazzy’s room. I knocked but she didn’t answer. Then, I called her name. Jasmine still didn’t respond so, I carefully opened the door.
Her bed was made like it had never been slept in. Jasmine wasn’t known for being neat and making beds. The baby was in the crib, next to it. A piece of notebook paper laid across the middle of the bed.
I went to the crib first and picked up Asia. I cradled her against my bare chest until she quieted. My niece was a good baby not like my son who at times was inconsolable. Jen and I were at our wits end with Jeremiah.
My niece was beautiful. Dark, fuzzy hair covered her head. She looked exactly like my brother. Then, I went to the bed. I had to read what was on that letter and face the truth. Jasmine was gone. Beneath the notebook paper was an envelope with Ben’s name on it. I knew this wasn’t going to be good.
I glanced at the child in my arms. I kissed my niece’s forehead. Then, I read the letter.
Elijah and Jenny,
I’m sorry to do this to you. I know I promised to take care of Jeremiah while Jenny went to work but I can’t do this. I’m only twenty. I couldn’t imagine ever hurting my baby or ending my pregnancy like Ben wanted, but he was right I’m not ready to be a mother.
I’m leaving Asia in your care. I hope that Ben will be a father to her since I can’t be her mother. I’ve been so depressed since she was born. I think you’ve realized that even if I couldn’t say anything and you didn’t either. I thought she would fill that void in my life since I left home but I’m not ready for this. Please understand.
I love you guys.
Please take care of her for me if Ben won’t.
Love,
Jasmine
Ben had better be ready to be a father. He was about to get one big surprise. I grabbed up both letters and headed down the hall to our bedroom with Asia tucked securely against my chest. “It’ll be all right baby girl,” I promised my niece.
“Jen, we have a problem,” I said as I opened the door to our room.
She rolled to her back, her hair spilling around her in loose curls. “What?”
“Jasmine left.”
“What do you mean, Jasmine left?” She sat up in the bed then I handed her the letter and I sat beside her while I grabbed my phone. “What are you doing?” She asked glancing at me then the letter in her hand.
“Calling Ben. He’s going to help with his daughter.”
Jenny rubbed her eyes. She snatched my phone out of my hand and snapped, “Wait a minute. Let me read the letter.”
Her eyes scanned the words Jasmine had written then she looked at me. “Do you think we should give her a day or two?”
“For what?” I asked staring at her like she had three heads.
“To come back,” Jen replied. I knew she couldn’t understand Jazzy leaving her baby but no, hell no. We were not waiting on her to return. What if she didn’t? We would have two newborns to care for. A terrifying thought since one of them didn’t know the meaning of sleep.
“No. Hell no, woman. We are having trouble with one six-week-old baby. We will be eaten alive by two of them,” I informed her.
My Jenny laughed at me. “What if she doesn’t come back, Elijah?” Her voice was soft and sad. She caressed Asia’s cheek.
“More reason to call my brother give him his letter and let him take care of his own kid,” I informed my wife.
She sighed at me. “What if she comes back?”
I knew what she was thinking. She didn’t want Jasmine and Ben to battle over Asia. She was a sweetheart of a kid. “Then Jasmine and Ben work that out between them. We support them both.”
“Let’s read Ben’s letter too,” Jenny suggested.
Nope. Not happening. We had done that when we approached Jasmine without his knowledge. “We are not invading his privacy. She told us what she wanted us to know. Whatever in his letter belongs to him.”
She was clinging tightly to that envelope. “Jenny hand it over.” I held tight to Asia with one hand and held out my other hand to my wife.
“Oh, all right,” she snapped. She slapped the envelope into my hand. “Now what?”
“I’m calling Rachel and getting reinforcements in getting my brother’s ass over here. He’s about to become a father in every sense of the word.”
Jenny chuckled at me. “That’s not fair.”
“What’s not fair about it?” I asked giving her a look.
Our son began to cry. Jen got up and as she walked away, she smiled over her shoulder at me. “You know you are fighting dirty by bringing Rachel into this. Ben won’t stand a chance.”
Then she headed to our son’s room across the hall from ours. She returned a few minutes later as I was rereading the letter from Jasmine. I didn’t see any other way than forcing Ben to be a father to his daughter.
Jenny sat on the bed and laid Jeremiah between us. Then she handed me a diaper. “Asia needs changed.”
“She’s a girl. You should change her,” I declared trying to hand the baby girl in my arms to my wife.
Jenny frowned at me. “You are changing our niece’s diaper. Then, you are calling your brother and telling him to come over here.”
I laid the little girl down at my bent leg. I unsnapped her sleeper and slid it up to her chest. I grumbled to myself things I didn’t want Jenny to hear while I undid the diaper. My girl handed me a wipe from the package that we kept on the nightstand.
She caressed the baby’s cheek. I glanced at her. Then I looked at the baby lying beside our son. I cleaned her up and put on a fresh diaper. Then I snapped up her sleeper and lifted her in my arms.
“Time for Daddy to come over here, Asia.” I glanced at my wife and sighed. “Time to get Rachel involved and for all hell to break loose.” I just didn’t see any other way.
Chapter 3
My mother was in my t
railer. I had to be dreaming. She was shaking me hard. Why was my mother in my trailer? I had a rough night last night. I drank too much once again, and Seth had to drive me home from the pub. Truth be told, he practically carried me inside.
Other things I didn’t want to think of filtered through my hungover brain. Disa Riley was in the men’s room while I was taking a piss. I had kissed her sweet lips.
I pushed my mother’s hand away. Surely to God, Rachel wasn’t here to reprimand me already. We had left my truck at Ike’s, so I had no escape. I was stuck unless I managed to steal my brother’s truck.
The painful throbbing in my head might have something to do with me never getting out of bed again. Drinking had become a norm for me since Elijah had married Jenny.
Hell, since Jasmine had told me she was pregnant I was drinking more than I ever had. It had only gotten worse, since I had held my daughter in my arms at the hospital the first night of her life.
It was stupid, I know. It wasn’t accomplishing anything. All I had to do was breakdown and tell Jasmine that I wanted to be a part of Asia’s life. I guess what was holding me back was what expectations did Jasmine still have of me? Did she think she came with that package?
My head was a confused mess since I had dropped off Jasmine the morning after I slept with her. Her cousin’s image haunting me every single day since then. I realized that I had been with Jasmine because she reminded me of Disa.
It was a cold wake-up call in the early morning hours. Then to find out that she lied to me about her age only made me more suspicious that she had tricked me about the birth control pills too.
The alcohol wasn’t making it any better either. Rachel shook me harder shouting at me to get my ass out of bed now. “Mom, for Christ’s sake, what the fucking hell are you doing here?” I bellowed at her, bolting upright in my bed.
I knew that was not the right thing to say or do. I had never in my life spoken to Rachel that way. My mother was glaring hard at me right now. I knew that look. I had seen it many times before. She wanted to slap the stupid out of me right now and I deserved it.