by Lynnea Lee
As she sat on the huge bed, her anger cooled. Maybe she was a little harsh on Kean. But then she remembered how he’d lunged at Rax and decided she wasn’t. Rax could have been killed!
From what she gathered from talking to the compound’s residents, Kean was not a rash male. He took time, deliberated, and made well-informed decisions. He was known to be logical, but his reaction today was anything but. Why did he act so out of character when it came to her?
You are MINE. His words echoed in her head. Sarah had thought he’d meant that he owned her because he’d killed Gadrek. But now, she wasn’t so sure. Could Kean care for her in other ways? He’d wanted her by his side at the party. But what if he wanted her by his side, period?
Sarah tried to stay angry with him, but the last look he gave her was so full of pain that she couldn’t. And besides, she had exhausted her anger by yelling at him. Sarah picked up the PPC and placed it on the nearby desk. Then she went to the door, but it was locked. Kean had locked her in.
She was a prisoner again, but this time in a beautiful and comfortable cage. Kean had given her so much freedom that it had been easy to forget that technically, he still owned her. But even with that knowledge, Sarah couldn’t summon forth her anger.
It was hard to stay angry at someone who looked at her with such defeat in his eyes.
She went to the sink and washed her tear-streaked face. The face in the mirror was fuller and healthier than the last time she’d checked, even though it had only been a few days. She had a rosy glow now, despite her recent cry.
With nothing left to do, she explored his suite. It was spacious and as rustically decorated as the rest of his compound. The bathroom she was in had a large tub as well as a cleansing unit. A big skylight lit the area with natural sunlight, and a few large potted plants offered a splash of green. One wall was a stone façade.
The living area had an oversized leather couch, or the Tallean equivalent of one which was more like a day bed, with a fur throw tossed over the back. It was adjacent to an open concept kitchen with stone-look counters and exposed wooden beams. Again, the whole suite had a lot of natural sunlight and potted plants in every corner. It almost seemed as if Kean had brought the outdoors into his home.
There were several dirty plates on the counter, and he had his own replicator, even though he could just as easily have food brought up from the kitchens. She hadn’t eaten lunch yet. But she didn’t know how the replicator worked. She pressed a few buttons, but she couldn't read the words on the screen. No matter, she didn’t have an appetite anyway.
How could she have an appetite after what happened? And they hadn’t even fixed things between them yet. Kean had just left. Sarah wasn’t sure what was worse. Screaming and yelling, or just leaving.
Large double doors opened out to a large balcony, and she stood at the edge and leaned over the railing. They were on the third floor, and it was much too high for her to climb down. Sarah wasn’t sure that would be the best course of action if she wanted to fix things between them and save Rax from imprisonment.
Heading back into the bedroom, she sat at the heavy wood and metal desk. There were a few notes scrawled in messy Tallean in Kean’s handwriting, but she hadn’t ever been taught how to read it. The glyphs all looked the same to her. She went on the PPC and pressed around but couldn’t get it working. She didn't understand any of the symbols.
Gadrek had not let her touch his PPC, and now Sarah felt so useless. She was sure that even slaves learned how to use a PPC to order household items and teach themselves how to cook. Sarah didn’t have any of the skills needed to be useful at all.
Considering she used to be a secretary and prided herself on keeping everything organized, it was quite depressing. There went the idea of asking Kean if she could help schedule his meetings. She couldn’t even get the damned thing running.
“Argh! Can’t I do anything right? I can’t even use a PPC. I’m so useless.”
And Sarah hadn’t even tried to be helpful since arriving at the compound. Instead, she’d spent her time being suspicious of and avoiding the very person who had rescued her and given her a good life. She hadn’t even tried to learn to read the language yet. And instead of asking Kean for help regarding her sister, after he had already told her he would, she’d gone looking for help elsewhere.
She got up from the desk, walked back out to the living room, and flopped down on the couch, defeated. That look on Kean’s face before he left stuck in her head. She’d never seen him like that. Kean was anything but vulnerable. He was fierce and respected. Other males cowered at his feet.
But that look! It was as if she had taken his heart out with a knife.
“He looked so dejected. What the fuck did I say?” She was glad there was no one here to hear her talking to herself. She doubted she would rid herself of this habit anytime soon.
Sarah had been so enraged at losing the chance to find her sister that she’d just let it all out without a filter. Then it hit her. She had said she hated him right before his change. Not once, but repeatedly. She’d spat the words at him with so much venom.
“Was it that?” she asked the empty room. Could that be it? Did Kean care enough about her that those words would hurt him? If he did, then, shit, she’d fucked things up royally.
Chapter 12
Kean watched Sarah through the security feed from his comm. The cameras in his suite were accessible by him alone. He understood that for humans, his behavior would be construed as stalking. But Sarah was his, and if he wanted to stalk what was his, then so be it. And besides, it was perfectly normal in Tallean culture for males to watch their females. It was a sign of caring.
He rubbed at his chest. The horrendous pulling there wouldn’t go away, and he wondered if the stress of running a whole planet was finally killing him. He’d survived an assassination attempt only to be taken out by a malfunctioning heart.
Her angry words kept circling around and around in his head, like cruel, pointed daggers. He’d thought himself impervious to hateful words. He’d thought that words were cheap and silly, not worthy of a male of action. He was wrong. Again.
On the screen, Sarah stepped out onto his balcony and stared down. He held his breath when he had a mental image of her trying to climb down. She would fall, and the fall from that height was deadly for humans. Luckily, she backed away from the edge and went back inside.
Sarah’s mouth moved as if she spoke to someone, but the camera showed no one else in his room. His little female had a habit of talking to herself and even to inanimate objects. It was endearing. Kean rubbed at his chest absentmindedly and smiled at the screen.
“Sir.”
Kean turned and found Zake and Rax; he’d called both of them in. They both had their heads bowed. Zake knew it was his fault for letting the two leave the compound. Kean had assigned him as Sarah’s personal guard. And Rax, even though he had been helping Sarah, knew he was not supposed to take her out of the compound.
Both were young and rash, but they had good hearts. Kean needed to find a suitable punishment, something they wouldn’t enjoy, but that would still teach them valuable lessons.
“Sarah explained that you were helping her find her sister. I know now that you were not stealing her away.”
Rax relaxed visibly.
“But you knew not to take her out of the compound. Where did you see her sister?”
“The local inn. The innkeeper had her.”
Kean would have to give the innkeeper a visit. Horin had told him that he’d sold her sister to a traveler; the traveler must have stayed at the inn.
“I’m assigning both of you to work in the crèche for ten days. Not as guards at the door, but as caregivers.”
Both males paled. “Watching babies?” Zake choked.
“Maybe it will teach you to watch one grown female.” That quieted him. “Now go. Get out of my face.”
Both males turned and fled, knowing they
got off easy.
Kean rubbed at his forehead. He wanted to go back to his suite and spend time with his female, teach her to care for him, convince her not to hate him. But his schedule was filled until past the evening meal. It was one of the drawbacks of owning a planet.
A knock sounded at the door, and Zharor walked in. “I heard what happened.” The look of concern was plain on the male’s face. He was never one to hide his thoughts from Kean. “Attacking Rax on sight with the intent to kill was extreme. It was reckless. That’s not like you.”
He could always rely on his friend to be honest with him; they’d built this empire together. Kean’s actions could be seen as a weakness and set them up as a target. The entire compound was already talking about it; news and rumors spread quickly here.
“It was irrational,” Kean agreed, ashamed of his brash actions. “Rax was helping her find her sister.”
“But you’ve already set up a reward for anyone with information leading to Chrissy’s safe return. I posted it this morning.”
“Rax didn’t see the notice, and I never told Sarah.” Kean leaned back into his chair and sighed. “I lose my head when it comes to her. I don’t understand it.”
“Maybe it’s best to keep her with us while we work. We can dress her up in expensive clothes to impress the guests and give her a PPC to keep her entertained. She will be safer here, and you will be able to keep your attention on our guests.”
Kean snorted. “She ran the first time she saw us working.” He didn’t want to see that look of fear in her eyes ever again.
“She’ll get used to it.” Zharor looked him in the eyes and turned serious. “You are acting as if she is your mate.”
“I hope not. She just told me she hates me.” He could still feel her little fists pounding angrily on his chest.
“She will calm.”
Forming a mating bond with someone who hated him back would be the ultimate punishment for all the wrong he’d done in his life. Not many Talleans survived an unfulfilled mating bond with their minds intact.
Kean had asked the Stars for a mate for years. A mate who hated him hadn’t been what he had in mind. But maybe that was all he deserved.
The day crawled by. Kean even skipped the evening meal, opting to move his schedule ahead. But by the time his meetings were over, it was dark. Kean opened the door to his suite and inhaled deeply. His quarters smelled like Sarah, and it made him inexplicably happy, despite the way they’d parted earlier.
He entered quietly, his predator’s body allowing him to move silently despite his size. He didn’t want to wake Sarah if she was already asleep. She was. Sarah snored softly on the bed, smelling of his soap, her chest rising and falling. The sounds were adorable, and Kean smiled.
After a long moment watching his female, he moved quietly to the replicator and ordered a simple meal. It was too late to bother the kitchens now, though he knew real food was healthier. He ate in silence, surprised that he even had an appetite.
Taking long pulls of his nuri leaf tea, he pulled up his PPC and checked to see what Sarah had looked at throughout the day and frowned. It seemed she hadn’t watched any vids or looked up anything on his computer. What had she done all day?
Sarah had put his used plates into the decontaminator but hadn’t turned it on. It didn’t look as if she’d done anything else. According to the history on the replicator, she hadn’t even made herself a meal. She’d gone to bed hungry. Kean rubbed at his brows, worried.
Hopefully, she hadn’t sat around collecting his weapons and plotting his death. He hadn’t hidden any of his weapons from her, and he regretted that now. He checked his wardrobe, opening the side that held his weapons. They were all there and didn’t look like they’d been touched. Maybe she didn’t hate him that much after all.
He jumped into the cleansing unit for a quick wash, hoping the sound wouldn’t wake her. When he stepped out, Sarah had changed positions but was still asleep. She looked so serene in the dark of his room, in his bed. Still naked from his cleanse, Kean snuck into bed with her, keeping his weight on the far side of the bed at first to avoid waking his little female.
The sheets and blankets already smelled like Sarah, even though it was her first night in his bed. Kean inched a little closer to his female, and instinctively, she snuggled in against him for warmth. Good. Her body knew he would protect her, even if her mind didn’t yet.
Kean closed his eyes and willed himself to sleep. Insomnia visited him often, with memories of his lost brother and the stress of running a drug empire. He knew better than to make a habit of using his own wares, but he kept a few Euphora capsules by the bed for nights where sleep refused to come. But tonight, lying next to Sarah, sleep welcomed him.
Chapter 13
Sunlight filtered through the window and woke Sarah from her sleep. Despite being in a new environment and the stress of the events from the day before, Sarah slept well. The moment her head had hit the pillow, and the scent of Kean on his blankets and sheets surrounded her, she’d felt calm. Sleep came easily.
Sarah stretched, and bare skin rubbed electrically against her leg. Her eyes popped open. Kean lay on the bed next to her, and she’d cuddled right into him in her sleep. One muscled arm draped over her waist, and the other was under her neck, pillowing her head.
“Good morning, little one,” he said in a low baritone.
She looked up, but all she saw was his chin. She pushed away so she could look at him and realized she’d been drooling on his arm. She wiped it up awkwardly, embarrassed. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. It’s cute.” He wrapped his arms around her and settled her back into a comfortable position on the bed. “I enjoy waking up with you. It will make the rest of my busy day more bearable.”
“Are you always this busy?”
They both avoided talking about what happened yesterday, pretending everything was fine. Sarah wondered how long they could ignore the elephant in the room.
“No, little one. Before I claimed Gadrek’s territory, my operation ran smoothly, without too much daily attention from myself. I’d even considered retiring and handing the infamy and responsibility over to someone younger. I’m too old for this.”
Sarah looked up at his face. Kean wasn’t young, but he didn’t look too old for anything.
“I didn’t expect to own a planet. When I came here, I just wanted a small piece of something to call my own. But all this work will be temporary. Once things settle, I will have more free time.” Then his face dropped. “But today is filled with deliberations and meetings with the many immoral crooks living on Vosthea.”
Which meant Sarah was stuck in here again for another day. Great. It was a gilded cage, but a cage nonetheless. There was nothing to do here other than to sleep and eat. And she couldn’t even figure out the replicator! She was going to go crazy in here. At least with Gadrek, she had her hatred of the guy to carry her to the next day. She’d spent her days daydreaming of Gadrek’s demise, and it had kept her sane.
But she couldn’t even do that with Kean. She didn’t want to. She wanted to fix things between them. She understood now that Kean did morally questionable things to keep himself and his people safe. He did bad things but wasn’t a bad person, if that was even possible.
“What’s the matter, little one?”
Sarah realized she was wearing her thoughts on her sleeve and was pouting like a child. “It’s nothing. I just get really bored in here. Can you show me how to use the replicator before you leave? I can’t read Tallean, and I don’t know what I’m ordering.”
“You did not eat yesterday. Are you hungry? I can order you something now.”
“I can’t stomach food in the morning. But if you show me how it works, I’ll eat later.”
“I’ll download the Tallean to English translations. It is a common modification now. I will do the same to the PPC. Don’t be afraid to use it. You didn’t use it yesterday.”
“I couldn’t get the PPC working, and I didn’t want to press something I shouldn’t.” She’d imagined accidentally deleting all his important files.
Kean frowned. “You’ve never used one before?”
“On Earth, sure, but not a Tallean one.”
“Let me reschedule my morning meetings, and I’ll teach you how to use it.” Kean reached for his comm.
“You don’t need to do that.” But inside, Sarah was thrilled Kean would delay his day to spend time with her. A warm, happy feeling tickled at her chest.
“It’s done.” Kean turned back to Sarah and gathered her into his arms. “It’s time I put work aside and spend some time with my female.” He held her eyes. “It was my fault we’ve had a rough start. I should have been spending more time with you.” He took her hands and enclosed them in his massive ones. “You feared me. That’s not acceptable. You should never fear me; I will never hurt you.”
“I don’t fear you anymore. I saw what you did to that thief, and I freaked out. But I’ve talked to people living in the compound. You do what you need to do to keep this place running and to keep everyone safe. I get that now.”
“Then why go to Rax for help?” The words came out tight and stiff. “Why didn’t you come to me?”
And the elephant was out. Sarah crossed her fingers, hoping it was a civil elephant and not a rampaging one. She wanted things to work out with Kean.
“I was asking everyone. Rax just happened to have seen a woman of Chrissy’s description. I didn’t even think before I left with him. I just wanted to see my sister.” Then she remembered the pained look on his face when he’d left yesterday. “I didn’t mean what I said. I don’t hate you. I don’t hate you at all.” She took a deep breath. “I was just so pissed off.”
“I am to blame. I should have known not to jump to conclusions before I’d gotten all the information. A mistake like that would have cost me dearly in my business. It should be no different with you.” Rough fingers gripped her chin and tilted her to look him in the eyes. “I don’t know why, but I find it hard to be rational when it comes to you. I’m sorry, Sarah. Will you forgive me?”