I sent a text to Joe, knowing he could fix this shit right away. Josh was just walking out of the office as I was putting away my phone.
“Ready?” he asked.
“Yeah, sub shop?”
He nodded. Josh was different, which I knew when he came back, but it showed more and more the longer I spent time with him. He was more withdrawn, not the same jovial guy he was before he disappeared. Sometimes I felt like I was talking to a stranger. And as long as this feud with Jack went on, and the town kept gossiping about him and Carly, things would never get better for him. Maybe he was right. Maybe it would be easier for them if they left and started over somewhere else. No one would know about their history or judge them for past mistakes. But I didn’t want him to run away. I wanted everyone to pull their heads out of their asses and see him for the guy they knew. Since when did we judge people for what happened to them? It was bullshit.
“So, how’s it going with that chick?”
“Charlie?”
“Yeah, is the sneaking around helping?”
I shrugged. “Eh, it’s going alright.”
He smirked at me. “That bad, huh?”
“I’m going down in flames,” I laughed.
I recounted my trip to the grocery store and then to Kohl's. I got a few half smiles out of Josh, which made my day. I didn’t care if I looked like an idiot in front of him, as long as it cheered him up for a little bit.
“So, you’re gonna keep trying?”
“Yeah, I know it seems stupid. I mean, it’s clear that we want different things, but there’s just something about her. When I’m with her, I just feel…”
“Alive,” he nodded, as if he completely understood.
“Exactly. As frustrating as it is that she doesn’t want a relationship, it also makes her more exciting. And when we hang out, she’s just really chill. There’s never any tension between us.”
“Except when you’re fighting over whether or not you’re in a relationship.”
“Well, besides then,” I admitted grumpily. “I don’t know. Am I foolish for thinking that this is real?”
He was quiet for a moment. “I’m not sure if I’m the right person to ask. Carly’s probably the last person on earth I would have gone for if I had known who she was. We were just thrown together and it worked. I had my doubts when we came back here that we could make this work. If she already has those doubts because of her last marriage, I’m not sure that’s something you can get through.”
Well, that hurt a lot more than I thought it would.
“But, hey, don’t listen to me. If you really like her, don’t give up without a fight. You’ll regret it for the rest of your life.”
We were just about to walk into the sub shop when I stopped, spotting Jack across the street. He was just walking out of the police department. He looked tired and worn, not at all like the man I once knew. His gaze swung over to us and his eyes narrowed. I could feel his anger all the way across the street.
“Shit,” Josh muttered, shuffling beside me.
Jack just stood there staring at us. I could see his fists clenching with anger and then Corduroy stepped out of the office, stopping by his side. He saw us across the street and started pushing Jack in the other direction. It didn’t matter if Jack said anything or not. The message was clear, he hated us and didn’t want us anywhere near him.
Charlie
Holy shit. I was in so much trouble. I really liked Will. And more than that, I really wanted to sleep with him again. That would lead to feelings and messy stuff that would get me in trouble. And one thing I wanted to stay away from was anything that could lead to feelings. I could honestly see myself being in a relationship again, but it would have boundaries. One in which he would have his place and I would have mine. There wouldn’t be sleepovers or any of the messy living arrangements. He would have his life and I would have mine.
The problem with this? Will was not cut out to have this kind of lifestyle. I could tell it from the way he was around his family. They had that close-knit unit that most people were envious about. It was clear that he wanted something long-lasting, while I was just hoping for a long-term relationship of fucking.
I walked down the street, not really having anyplace in particular to go, and stopped outside a floral shop that I had seen many times before, but never stopped in. I peered inside, and then looked closer when I saw a familiar figure inside. Unable to resist, I opened the door and walked inside.
“Hey, stranger.”
He spun around and grinned at me. “Hey, fancy meeting you here.”
“Are you stalking me?” I asked with a sly grin.
He looked panicked for just a second before he cleared his throat and gave an awkward grin. “Just getting something for a pretty lady,” he said, pointing to the flowers.
“Oh,” I said, my smile faltering. Was he taking another woman out? Was he moving on? Maybe the sex was only that fantastic to me. However, I had told him it was over. What did I expect? But then we had so much fun at the bar, I just assumed he might call and try and set up another time to get together. But that never happened. It had been a week and I hadn’t heard a peep from him.
I nodded at the flowers, plastering a smile on my face. “Hot date?”
He shrugged slightly. “If you want to count my Ma coming into town.”
“Oh,” I said, somewhat relieved. Okay, extremely relieved. “That’s nice of you. I don’t actually know any men that buy their mother flowers.”
“Well, my Ma lives out of state. When she comes to visit, I have to make her see me as the better son.”
“And does that work?” I asked, chuckling slightly.
“Well, Eric is the golden boy and he has Kat. And then Robert just redeemed himself with Anna, so not sure how I can beat that. And let’s not forget Josh, the brother that came back from the dead.”
“Sounds like you have quite the competition.”
“Well, I still have Andrew and Joe. At least I think I still rank higher than them.”
“Ah, but the baby of the family always takes the cake.”
He huffed and lowered his head in defeat. “So, I’m screwed no matter what.”
“Well, you could always take a hot girl to meet your mother.”
“Yeah,” he snorted. “I’ll just go pick up one off the streets.”
I glanced around and held my arms wide. His eyes widened comically and he shook his head slightly.
“Are you serious?”
“Why not? I’m up for a little fun.”
“You do realize that this is my Ma we’re talking about. She’ll have your wedding dress picked out before you leave the house.”
“Oh, I’d like to see her try,” I grinned maliciously.
He smiled at me, obviously grateful for the offer, but then he said something unexpected. “Look, it’s really nice of you to offer, but I don’t want to drag you into my family stuff.”
“It’s really not a big deal,” I reassured him.
“I know, but I know how you feel about relationships, and everyone there is going to be making assumptions, and I wasn’t lying about Ma picking out your wedding dress,” he laughed. “So, thank you, but I’ll pass.”
Was he really rejecting my offer? I couldn’t believe it. Most men would jump at the chance to bring home a woman to take the heat off of themselves.
“Will, I really don’t mind. In fact, I think it might be fun.”
He snorted again.
“I’m serious. I had a lot of fun with you and your brother at the bar. This is just that plus a few people.”
“More than a few people,” he chuckled.
“Come on. Are you telling me that you don’t want to see the look on their faces when their gay son shows up with a woman on his arm?”
He laughed, and it was such a sexy laugh. A deep chuckle that sent tingles down my spine. He shook his head slightly. “Fine, but I’ll owe you twice for this one.”
“Deal.”<
br />
* * *
“Where’s Oliver?” Nathan asked as he walked through the door. I swear, Nathan thought of that kid as his own son half the time. He didn’t say hi or give me a kiss on the cheek. No, he wanted to hang out with Oliver.
“In his room.”
“Did you tell him I was coming over?”
“Yes.”
“Well, where is he then?”
I stared at him. “I just told you, he’s in his room.”
He huffed in irritation and sat down at the island.
“You want some wine?” I asked, holding up the bottle for him. He nodded and I grabbed a glass for him. “How was your day?”
“Not bad. Surgery sucked. I lost a patient.”
I nodded. We rarely discussed work outside the hospital. He would tell me all about it tomorrow, but tonight, he was here to unwind from his day.
“Did you hear anything from the baseball player?”
I shot him an irritated look. “You can call him Will.”
“I know I can, but I like the baseball player better.”
“I actually ran into him today.”
“Yeah? Doing what?”
“He was picking out flowers for his mother. I’m going with him tomorrow to see her.”
“He picked up flowers for his mother the day before he’s going to see her?”
“No, he was ordering something special. It’s sweet.”
“So, why are you going to see her? Isn’t that a little too much like a relationship?”
“Why? I would go with you to see your mother.”
“Yes, but she knows that you and I are not dating.”
I shrugged. “It’ll be fun. It’s not a big deal. Besides, I like his family.”
“Wait, didn’t you break up with him because he tried to introduce you to his family?”
“Well…yes,” I stammered, “but he knows that’s not what this is. I’m just going along for the fun of it. Besides, I met his brother, Joe, and I liked him. His family is nice.”
“If you like his family, then why don’t you actually date him?”
“You know why,” I said, drinking some wine.
“Or you could try giving this guy a chance.”
I leaned on the counter, thoroughly irritated with this shit. “Why do you keep pestering me about this? Ever since you met the guy, you keep pushing me to go out with him.”
“Because he likes you.”
“So do you.”
“Yeah, but I’m not gonna marry you.”
“And I’m not going to marry anyone else,” I shot back. “Besides, he’s too nice for me.”
Nathan scoffed at that. “Too nice?”
“Yeah, you know, he’s wholesome. He wants the wife and kids. He wants the happy life with the big, blue house and flowers in the garden.”
“Wow, is that how people live?”
“Some people,” I said irritatedly, picking up my glass, only to realize it was empty. I poured myself some more as he continued.
“So, let me ask you, what’s so wrong with that picture?”
“Well, I would have to keep up the big house, do all the gardening, and take care of the kids.”
“Somehow, I don’t see Will as the type to let you do it all alone.”
“You’ve always understood where I stand on this. Why are you pretending like the way I live is crazy?”
He sighed and leaned back in his chair, staring into his wine glass. “Do you ever get the feeling that everyone else out there is getting it right and we’re the ones that are fucking up?”
“Not at all,” I said easily. But Nathan still wasn’t looking at me. “What’s this about?”
He shrugged. “You know I love you,” he started off, which was always a bad way to start. “I just sometimes think I want more.”
My eyes bugged out and I stepped back. “Nathan-“
“Not with you,” he huffed. “Just…with someone that makes me feel like I’m the only man in the room.”
Something must have happened. That was the only reason that he would be saying this stuff. “Nathan, what happened?”
He drained his wine and set down the glass. “This woman I was performing surgery on, she was young, maybe early thirties. I did everything right, but…her body gave out. It was supposed to be simple…” he trailed off. “And then I had to go tell her husband, and he stood there, staring at me with tears in his eyes, just utterly devastated.”
I had a flashback to the night I met Will, when I performed surgery on his friend’s wife. She had died, but there had been nothing I could do for her. I knew when she entered the operating theater that there was nothing I could do to save her. She was too damaged. And then walking out to tell him, the devastation in his eyes was too much for me to take.
“This has happened before. You’ve lost patients before. What’s different about this one?”
“Usually they’re old. They’ve lived life. I just…you know when you tell an older person that their loved one has died, you know they had all these wonderful years together. And seeing this guy, I wondered, would anyone ever love me that much? And here I am, dicking around, not giving a shit about anything or anyone except work. What happens if I die in a car accident? Who is the doctor going to tell that I died?”
“Me,” I said, reaching across the island to grab his hand.
He looked so sad, so depressed at the thought that it made my insides hurt. That’s why he wanted to see Oliver as soon as he got here. He needed the connection.
“What if I want more?” he said quietly. “What if this is no longer good enough? That boy you have in the other room…I want that. I never thought I would want that before.”
“Nathan, are you sure you’re not just having a bad day?”
He huffed out a laugh. “Right, because I couldn’t want a family?”
“I’m not saying that. I just…you’ve never wanted this before. It makes me wonder if maybe this is hitting you too hard.”
He stood suddenly, snatching his keys off the counter. “You’re probably right. It’s nothing.”
“That’s not-“
“Really, I’m fine. I was just thinking out loud.”
I wanted to grab him and tell him it was okay to want that, but he practically ran out the door before I had a chance to say anything. It wasn’t that I didn’t think Nathan was capable of love, I had just never seen this side to him before. He was always so cold and withdrawn when it came to love. It would be different if he had met someone, but I had a feeling that tomorrow he would feel completely different about all of this. Then again, maybe that was me projecting my feelings on him.
Will
“You really don’t have to do this,” I said for the third time as we pulled into the driveway.
“Would you relax? It’ll be fine. Besides, I can already hear the pin drop in the house when I walk through the door.”
I laughed at that and reached over to squeeze her hand. “Well, no expectations. I’m just telling them you’re a friend.”
“That’s no fun. So, no secret story going on between us that you want to spread just to spike their curiosity?”
“Well, I could tell them you’re a hot girl that I met at the hospital, but that might be more of a killer than anything.”
“Right, I keep forgetting about that. I mean, not that I forget about her…just that I forget that you knew her.”
I sighed as I put the truck in park. “Yeah, about that, Josh and his wife will be here. I don’t know that this will be a good idea. It could get uncomfortable.”
“Why?” she asked in confusion. “You don’t blame him, do you?”
“Of course not, but you were Natalie’s doctor. It could bring up some bad memories.”
“Oh, well, that’s understandable, but I say we just try and move on as best as we can. I mean, bringing it up and acting weird isn’t going to make it any easier.”
“If you say so,” I agreed. “Ready?”
&nbs
p; We both got out and headed toward the door. Charlie had absolutely no fear about any of this. But I was sweating like crazy. I had to keep in mind what my main objective was. I wasn’t dating her. She was simply a friend, a friend I was trying to manipulate into getting to sleep with me again. I had to play my cards very carefully here.
Eric opened the door and grinned at me, his eyes flicking to Charlie in disbelief. “You’re here,” he said, stating the obvious.
“Well, I heard your parents were in town and couldn’t resist temptation.”
His eyes moved back to mine and then back to her. “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea. Ma will have you sized up for a wedding-“
“Dress,” she grinned. “Yes, I’ve heard. And I’m thrilled at getting to play along with the whole charade.”
“Charade for you, but very real for her,” Eric said.
“I think this will be fun,” Charlie grinned, pushing past my brother and stepping inside.
Eric stepped outside onto the porch with me, shaking his head slightly. “I thought you had a plan to get her back that consisted of you backing off.”
“I did back off.”
“Then why is she here?”
“I ran into her at the flower shop in town. I didn’t know she would be there. Next thing I know, she’s invited herself along. What the hell was I supposed to say?”
“No,” he said emphatically. “If anything, Ma is going to ensure that you never see this woman again.”
I sighed heavily, knowing this was true. But what the hell was I supposed to do about it now? “Look, I really like her and she insisted on coming along. If I told her no and walked away, how would that help me any?”
“How does inviting her to come along to meet a woman whose only goal in life is to marry off her sons a way of helping your situation?”
“Look, I just have to play this cool. Charlie and I are friends and that’s it. You guys all go along with it, laugh up how you thought I was gay and how I ran Charlie off with the town shenanigans. We don’t have to convince Ma that we’re not getting married. We have to convince Charlie. Just make her feel like one of us.”
Textbook Approach: A Small Town Romance Page 17