Lesbia Chronicles: Over Witch's Knee

by Ther Renard

  "That's... a little far fetched," Kira said, guarded.

  "Is it? How did you meet her?"

  "She rescued me after my unit was attacked," Kira said, giving the short version of events.

  "Attacked where? How? You don't seem like the sort of person who needs rescuing very often," Atrocious pointed out.

  "It was a long time ago. I was young. They came from nowhere..."

  Atrocious nodded as Kira trailed off. "Came from nowhere, did they?"

  Kira pressed her lips together as she thought about what Atrocious was implying. "That's not possible," she said finally. "She can't... no she couldn't have... It's not possible."

  "Or maybe it just seems impossible because you don't know how the trick is done," Atrocious said. "Maybe she has been playing us all for fools for years."

  "For over a decade? To what end?"

  "Now that is the question," Atrocious said, slipping down the tree so that her knees were higher than her head as she looked about furtively. "Haven't you ever felt as if nothing is really accidental? As if things were just going to happen no matter what you did?"

  "Sometimes," Kira admitted. "I guess I never really thought about it."

  "That's the trick, isn't it," Atrocious said. "Nobody ever really thinks about it. It hides in plain sight, sometimes we spot it for a second and call it coincidence, but... it's not coincidence is it? None of this is. The same sorts of things keep happening to the same sorts of people."

  "Wait," Kira said. "So are you blaming Ayla for this... or some kind of Fate?"

  "I don't know," Atrocious shrugged. "Maybe both. I just don't think this feels right anymore. It's all too neat. Every time things go awry, she ties the ends up in a tight little bow. She makes everything alright, but then you find yourself ever deeper in her trap." Atrocious picked a blade of grass and pulled it in two. "She wants something from us. You know she does."

  "I know she's up to something," Kira said. "I don't know about the rest of it."

  "Seriously," Atrocious said, sliding down until her head reached the ground. "Have you not sat in a tavern and seen the same people coming and going? Maybe a different nose or a slight bit shorter, but basically the same people - variations on a theme. It's like the goddess only knows how to make a dozen types or so and she just keeps churning them out over and over and over again. And we all think we're so special, but really we're just the same as everyone else. Thinking the same thoughts, doing the same things."

  "That Banisteria really went to your head, didn't it," Kira chuckled.

  "Don't laugh at me, I'm onto something here," Atrocious said, staring intensely up into the leaves. "Maybe that's how she does it. Maybe she wasn't looking for you or me specifically. Maybe she just needed one of our types. Like in a recipe. If it needs some raspberries, it doesn't matter what raspberries you use. You don't have to ask the raspberry its name, or what it thinks about pie, you just pick the first juicy berry that comes to hand."

  There was a protracted period of silence as the warrior digested that slice of theory. "You know... you might actually have a point," Kira admitted begrudgingly.

  "I know I do," Atrocious said, nibbling at her lower lip as she extended her hand towards a low hanging bough. "But you know what?"

  "What?" Kira shifted onto her side, looking at Atrocious with interest.

  "Sometimes things aren't always what they seem. Sometimes what you think is a juicy raspberry is actually a poisonous one that just looks similar. And sometimes a twig on a tree isn't a twig at all." She drew her hand down from the leaves, showing Kira a bright green stick insect, three inches long. It swayed gently on her hand, emulating the movement of the branches in the breeze.

  "Ayla is not the only one who can play shadow games," Atrocious said, gazing at the little creature as it swayed back up onto the tree branch. "If we're going to work out her game, we have to be more than what she supposes us to be. We have to be more than what we suppose ourselves to be."

  The erstwhile thief spoke in a low murmur, but with a deep conviction that transcended her scruffy appearance and belied her years. Kira felt a tingle down her spine, the same feeling she'd had when listening to a particularly charismatic officer giving a rousing speech. Quiet little Atrocious was on the war-path, and though five minutes earlier Kira would never have given her a copper coin's chance in a furnace of besting Ayla, it now seemed the witch might have a worthy adversary after all.

  ~~~

  After a pleasant afternoon of scheming and plotting, the scent of food brought Atrocious and Kira traipsing out of the field and into Ayla's cottage. They arrived to find the witch wearing a white apron and toiling over a hot stove. Her hair was down and fell in long blonde skeins to her waist, blowing in the slight breeze as she turned to greet her guests with a smile that looked sweet, but Atrocious knew masked all sorts of hidden plans.

  "Oi," Atrocious said, marching up and poking Ayla in the stomach. "I know what your game is."

  "Do you?" Ayla looked down at her with a little smile.

  "Well no," Atrocious admitted. "But I know you have one."

  "Hm," Ayla said, turning back to the stove. "Take your armor off, it's time for dinner."

  "Watch out for that," Kira interjected. "Sometimes food isn't food around here."

  "Isn't it?" Atrocious puzzled. "What is it?"

  "This is food," Ayla said, casting a warning look at Kira. "Now take that oversized vest off in here Atrocious, you don't need it."

  "Don't tell me what to wear," Atrocious scowled. "I will wear what I want."

  Ayla paused for a moment, holding the wooden spoon she had been using to stir the stew. "At what point in our adventures did you decide you no longer had to do as you were told?"

  Frowning, Atrocious crossed her arms over the vest, making the mail jingle. "I'm not taking it off. You can't make me."

  Ayla's fine brow creased into displeasure. "Is that what you think?"

  "I can do things," Atrocious said. "I can make things appear. You can't tell me what to do anymore."

  Ayla's lips thinned as her patience waned. "Atrocious, take that vest off and sit down for dinner, or I promise you won't be able to sit at all."

  With narrowed eyes, Atrocious lifted her thumb to her mouth and bit the tip of it in a defiant gesture.

  Sighing, Ayla put down the spoon, wiped her hands on a cloth and took Atrocious by the ear. As the witch's long fingers pinched against the sensitive ridge, Atrocious squealed in outrage.

  "Let me go!"

  "I will let you go when you are in the corner," Ayla said, releasing Atrocious long enough to swat her into position where the two walls met. "You can wait there until I am ready to punish you."

  Pouting, Atrocious looked over her shoulder at Kira for backup, but the warrior just winked and shrugged. Obviously their little pact did not extend to any help in disciplinary scrapes. That was disappointing. As soon as Ayla returned to the stove, Atrocious stepped out of the corner boldly.

  "Atrocious...." Ayla spoke warningly, her back still turned. Atrocious had no idea how Ayla had known she was no longer in the corner.

  "What, I'm not... you can't make me," Atrocious repeated herself.

  Ayla damped the fire, untied the strings of her apron, removed it over her head and calmly turned up the sleeves of her robe. "I see you and I will have to have a little discussion now," she said, taking Atrocious by the hand. As much as Atrocious tried to wriggle and pull away it was impossible to do so, and in very short order, the witch sat down and drew Atrocious over her lap.

  "No!" Atrocious yelled, quite furious at the sudden turn of events. She had been feeling very smart and quite in control of matters, but now, facing the bare floorboards of Ayla's cottage, that illusion was slipping away far too quickly for her liking. "Let me go, witch! Let me go!"

  "All you had to do was take off your vest and have dinner," Ayla replied. "A simple enough thing, don't you think?" She smoothed her palm over the thin material covering Atrocious'
bottom. "But you wanted to be defiant."

  "Why won't you just let me have my own damn way," Atrocious swore, wriggling in place as Ayla wrapped one dreaded arm about her waist.

  "Because it's not good for you to get your way," Ayla said, her tone quite placid as she began placing light, stinging slaps across Atrocious' bottom. "It's not good for you to think that you will be allowed to be petulant and rude, is it?" She slapped a little harder, catching Atrocious across her lower cheeks in a blow that made the unfortunate thief squeak.

  "You will listen to your elders and respect them, understand me?" Ayla lectured her. "You've caused a lot of trouble, young lady. You do not need to cause any more."

  "I have not caused trouble! You have caused trouble you damn... damn tricky witch."

  Ayla's palm swept down in a fast arc and contacted Atrocious' bottom in a hard slap that echoed around the cottage. "I am not the one who burned down our shelter," she said, repeating the treatment with another harsh slap that made Atrocious cry out plaintively.

  "That was Rogette," Atrocious sniffed, reaching out to steady herself with her hands on the floor. "But you never blame anything on her, do you? No, she's always perfect little Rogette."

  "This isn't about Rogette," Ayla replied, smacking Atrocious' bottom with sound, crisp smacks that heated her bottom through her dress. "This is about you, you little troublemaker. Why, even the way you spoke to Ariadne was rude and disrespectful."

  "She's a goddess, I think she'll get over it," Atrocious replied with a bitter sniffling.

  Ayla paused. "What did you say?"

  Stiffening, Atrocious assumed that she must have said something else wrong. "I said she'll get over it?"

  "Before that." Ayla rubbed Atrocious' bottom with little circles.

  "She's a goddess?"

  "Yes. How did you know that?"

  "Isn't it obvious?" Atrocious craned her neck around to see both Kira and Ayla looking at her as if she'd grown another head. "I mean... it's obvious, right?"

  "You must never say that aloud again," Ayla cautioned her. "That is one of the deepest secrets of our kind."

  "It's not a very deep secret," Atrocious muttered as Ayla rubbed her bottom, soothing away the sting with a warm hand. "Unless you have no eyes in your face."

  Atrocious did have eyes in her face. She had eyes in her face and muscles in her arms and legs. She used the latter to push off Ayla's lap, fall to the floor and run outside.

  "ARIADNE IS A GODDESS," she shouted at the top of her lungs. "AND I CAN MAKE LITTLE EL..." she did not finish the sentence, because Ayla clapped a hand over her mouth and hauled her bodily back inside, kicking and squirming all the way.

  "I don't know what has gotten into you," she said crossly, depositing Atrocious on the kitchen mat, "but you can consider your speaking privileges revoked."

  Atrocious made a rude, defiant gesture as Ayla's spell took effect, making speech impossible.

  "Is that how you are going to behave, is it?" Ayla's brow rose. "Then you can go to bed without any dinner."

  Shaking her head silently, Atrocious mouthed 'NO' at the top of her muted lungs.

  "Yes," Ayla said firmly, her hands on her hips as she leaned over the defiant thief. "Go upstairs and go to bed."

  "NO!" Atrocious mouthed silently again.

  "I can only assume you want to be thrashed," Ayla said. "You are very close to getting your wish."

  Her mouth was drawn quite tight and her green eyes were narrowing by the second. She did not seem to be her usual patient self. Pretending to give in, Atrocious started climbing the stairs, Ayla's gaze boring into her with every step. She was almost at the top when she turned, took two steps down and jumped over the railing and scampered back outside, laughing with silent glee.

  "Kira, would you go and beat her for me please," Ayla said, putting her head in her hand. "I am getting too old for this sort of game."

  "Do you expect her to be obedient? After Ariadne outed your little plan to bring us all here?"

  "Not you too," Ayla said in groaning tones.

  "Yes, me too," Kira said, folding her arms as Atrocious ran hither and thither past the open door. "I don't like being manipulated and lied to."

  Ayla's expression drew several shades darker as she lifted her finger and pointed toward the door. "Out," she said.

  "Out?" Kira repeated the word, uncertain of its meaning.

  "You can both sleep outside," Ayla snapped. "I grow tired of playing both nursemaid and villain."

  "It's not..."

  "OUT," Ayla repeated herself firmly. "Now."

  "So if we question you, you throw us out. I see how this works," Kira said, sauntering towards the door. "I'll leave with pleasure." As she made to leave, Atrocious ran into her at full speed, sending them both crashing to the ground in front of Ayla's house. The witch looked down at the mess of tangled limbs, shook her head and closed the door on them.

  "Well that didn't go as planned, did it?" Kira said, disentangling herself.

  Atrocious shook her head. No. It had not gone as planned at all. She went around to the window of the cottage and peeked in at Ayla, who was stirring the stew very crossly. For the first time that Atrocious could recall, she looked a little bit old. A little bit tired. Atrocious knocked on the window, hoping Ayla would look up, but the witch simply twitched the curtain across the window.

  "Leave her be," Kira said wisely.

  Atrocious sulked away from the cottage. It wasn't fair. Rogette was being petted and cosseted by Ariadne and she was being shut out of doors without being able to so much as speak. As she walked, she spotted a bush which seemed a likely target for her frustrations. Lashing out with her foot, she kicked the bush. Just before her foot slammed into the delicate twigs, the bush avoided the kick by getting up and shuffling away.

  With wide eyes, Atrocious pointed to the bush, but Kira had not seen what she had seen and simply shrugged. Atrocious tried to mime what had happened, but only succeeded in appearing to have some kind of mild fit.

  "Stop messing around," Kira said. "We'll have to try and find somewhere sheltered to bed down for the night."

  Atrocious scowled and pointed back toward the cottage.

  "I don't think she's going to let us back in tonight," Kira said, "she's pretty angry with us."

  Atrocious did not like the feeling of Ayla being angry at her. It made her tummy feel hollow and her head feel heavy. She sat down in the grass, feeling sorry for herself. The new toy smell must have worn off her, now Ayla didn't care for her anymore.

  "Come on," Kira said. She bent down and scooped Atrocious up by taking her by the arm and pulling her up and over her shoulder. "We'll be fine out here."

  Atrocious would have laughed and squealed with glee as Kira carried her off, but instead she was delightedly mute. Together they gathered dry grasses and a few sticks and Atrocious watched as Kira put together quite a serviceable little shelter using one of the crevices of the high stone walls.

  Whilst Kira built a circle for a fire, Atrocious scampered around the village, borrowing the odd egg out from under the odd chicken and pulling out lettuce and carrots and anything else she could get her hands on. She took her haul back to Kira, who nodded approvingly.

  "Most of this stuff will cook in the embers."

  They sat down before the fire, Kira cross-legged and poking the flames with a sturdy stick, Atrocious pressed up against her right side. There were few places in the world that felt as safe as Kira's side.

  Atrocious and Kira spent the night in front of the embers of the fire, Atrocious curled up beside Kira, who kept a protective arm draped about her waist until the sun rose. When morning came, the door to the witch's cottage stood open. They made their way over, hoping for breakfast, but when they arrived they found Ayla sitting at the kitchen table with a mug of tea. There was no breakfast in sight.

  "Is everything alright?" Kira asked. The witch did not seem her usual stoically calm self. Her robe was creased, her hair was lank a
gainst her face and her expression was devoid of her usual light. It was as if somebody had switched off the very thing that made her what she was.

  "I know I'm not strictly human," Ayla said softly, wrapping her hands around the earthenware mug that sat before her. "But I would still like to be treated as a person."

  Atrocious and Kira looked at one another, feeling the same toe curling guilt.

  "I'm sorry, Ayla," Atrocious said, not quite understanding how she was apologizing to the woman who had originally kidnapped her. "But you... you... you tried to sell me once, so forgive me if I don't quite trust you."

  "And Ariadne did say that you had brought us here, like you did so for a reason," Kira added.

  "I did bring you here for a reason, the reason being that Atrocious seems set on getting herself killed." Ayla turned to Atrocious. "You say I kidnapped you. You showed up on my doorstep filthy, skinny and entirely alone. You had no sense of self preservation at all. I could not let you leave in good conscience, anymore than I'd put a stray kitten out. As for selling you, it was to Kira. A good match I thought."

  "Well..." Atrocious said begrudgingly.

  "Now, thanks largely to you, my home in the woods is overrun with Imperials, we are all being hunted and still, to this very day, you seem to find it impossible to show the slightest scrap of gratitude," Ayla snapped. "You compare yourself to Rogette, but what you fail to take into account is that Rogette at least attempts to be pleasing. You have done nothing more than sulk, pout, scheme and behave badly."

  Ayla turned her hard gaze on Kira. "As for you," she said solemnly. "You are here because you want to ensure her safety. But you are not so different from her. You believe talk of my villainy, though I have never shown you anything but kindness. You put stock in the conspiracy theories of a thief who barely knows what an honest day's work looks like. Do you blame me for being tired of you both?"