by Fiona Murphy
With the shake of his head, he doesn’t allow me to move. “When you walked out of the dressing room I wanted to pull you into my lap and fuck you until you screamed. Only I couldn’t do that because I’m a civilized motherfucker. Have no fucking doubt you are always beautiful. The dress only helps you and others see what I already know. Got it, Regina?”
I meet his eyes in the mirror. Turbulent, bluer than blue churning deep in the ocean, I’m going under and I don’t care anymore. I nod.
“No, I need you to say it.”
“I’m beautiful.”
“Again, princess.”
Turning in his arms, I press against him. The arm around my waist tightens until I can barely breathe, only it’s not nearly tight enough.
“I’m beautiful.” I exhale the words as Dominic lowers his lips to mine.
“Good girl,” he whispers. He presses a kiss to the skin where my neck meets my shoulder then he sucks slowly, deeper and deeper to the very edge of pain, and I’m shivering against him. I watch as he studies the skin. I know a bruise will show soon, his satisfaction is clear. Then he’s gone.
Lydia is back and her look of concern disappears when she sees me. She grins knowingly. “I told you so.”
Gradually over the next hour I find myself actually having fun, especially when Dominic does indeed growl a few times at the dresses Lydia puts me in. Long after I thought I had more than enough clothes, we’re still going. I think we’re done but no, we’re moving onto panties and bras, then shoes. Then finally Dominic checks the time. It’s time to meet the dressmaker Lydia called in a favor with. My stomach drops at the idea of a wedding dress. At how the words thrill me.
Dominic’s phone rings and he tells me he has to take the call, to give him a minute. The moment his back is turned I scan the store, wondering if there’s an exit close by. I have to go today, or I never will.
“Don’t, Regina.” Gone is the smiling Lydia. “I get the fear, but don’t. He’s a Sabatini. Yes, they can be assholes, yes, they are ruthless as fuck, and yes, Dominic and Tony have spilled blood. They also love deeply with every fiber of their being. Once they finally give in to admitting that love. Even when they aren’t ready to admit it, though, they’ll protect you from the whole wide world, including themselves.”
It scares me all over again how badly I want to believe her.
“I know you don’t know me. You do know Dominic, even if it’s only been a few days, you know deep down what I’m telling you is the truth. I think that is what is scaring you. Don’t let it. Be brave, you deserve to be loved the way he’ll love you. And Dominic,” she sighs, “he needs your love. He won’t think so, he’ll try and deny it.” She shakes her head. “Don’t let him.”
I close my eyes, fighting for control of the rioting emotions inside me.
“Regina?” Dominic is watching me. “It’s time to go.”
Nodding, I take the hand he holds out to me. His hand is so big, warm, yet gentle as he holds mine.
“I’ll be looking for my wedding invitation in the mail,” Lydia teases.
“You’ll receive it soon,” Dominic assures her.
Down on the street, Dominic opens the car door for me, but he doesn’t get in. “Marco and Dario will be with you. I have business I have to see to. Be a good girl, Regina.”
It’s a warning. I nod.
At the dressmaker Marco warns me, he’ll be outside of the front door and Dario is going around to the back door.
It’s a nightmare. The dressmaker, Callie, is eager to please. The dresses are gorgeous, frothy, romantic, and I want them all. Callie says it’s cute the way Dominic sent her dresses he liked and envisioned me in. How he told her he wanted me to have the dress of my dreams. She had never spent so long talking to a groom as she had with Dominic. If this were the wedding of my dreams, then this would be a dream come true. It isn’t, I try to tell myself. Until she tells me that Dominic told her on our wedding day, I would go from being his princess to his queen, and he wanted me to feel that way.
Those words stay with me through the long appointment as she tries to incorporate Dominic’s desires as well as my own in a dress. For a long moment I allow myself to forget the reality of how I came to be standing in front of the mirror in a beautiful white wedding dress with actual gold stitching throughout the delicate bodice. It’s a dress fit for a queen, and I feel just as beautiful in it as Dominic told me I was.
14
Regina
After the dressmaker Marco drives me to the wedding planner, Sonya, who tells me the ceremony will take place at the major cathedral downtown with the reception to follow at the Drake Hotel just two blocks away from it. The wedding planner is brash and has a hard edge to her. I’m pretty sure she’s perfect to make everything happen in two weeks. She also tells me that the wives of Dominic’s three cousins will be my matron of honor and bridesmaids. Nice to know, then I remember that without them I wouldn’t have anyone else to do it.
Three hours later my head is spinning, and I have a slight headache but everything that needed to be chosen has been. I hated I was doing it alone.
Yet even though Dominic isn’t here, he’s involved. From his orders to Callie and Lydia and the laundry list he gave to Sonya, he’s exerting his control, and yet...he’s not running me over with what he wants, he’s leaving me options, letting me decide. Sonya had also made that clear: Dominic wanted certain elements, but how that happened was up to me.
Except it’s all an illusion. None of this is how I dreamed—god, I’m such a liar. The big white dress, the over-the-top flowers which are so expensive I couldn’t breathe when Sonya and the florist discussed the prices as if I weren’t even there. It didn’t matter I thought it was too expensive; it was what I wanted, so Dominic decreed it was what I would have.
Yes, I wanted the man I was going to marry to love me enough to grant my every wish. Except this is all wrong because he’s not the man I dreamed of. He carries a gun and he kills people and he threw me into the trunk of a car, and he threatened the life of a man I was foolish enough to believe I loved. How can I think I love him when he is who he is?
No, no, no. You don’t, don’t be stupid. It’s been less than three full days. You do not love him. Focus, Regina, you have to find a way out of this and you have to do it today.
At the doctor’s office I’m given the birth control implant Dominic wanted. The doctor is very obviously a mafia doctor—the office has few supplies except for what was needed likely to give stitches and remove bullets. Neither the nurse or doctor wore anything even resembling scrubs, we could have been in any office. I had been worried about pain, but the shot to numb me is the only thing that hurts. I’m warned it will leave a bruise and be tender for a week or so and to use condoms for at least seven days. I nod, no way is it something I’m going to worry about.
We’re inching closer and closer to the apartment and tension is building within me. If I don’t go now, I know I’ll never get a chance. Out of nowhere Everett slams on the brakes.
“Fuck, Everett,” Marco groans as he pulls his seat belt away from his chest.
“I apologize, there’s a car accident up ahead.”
It’s now or never. I unclip my seat belt, moaning. Marco barely notices as he leans between the two front seats. Slowly, I unlock my door. I sigh as it moves; then I take a deep breath, open the door, and run.
Thank god I’m in flats. Up one side street, down a short alley. I almost cry in relief to see a police car and two cops in uniform, one leaning against the car and the other running his eyes over the street.
“Help me,” I call out.
The words are barely out before a rough hand comes around my arm, yanking me up against a hard chest.
Both cops straighten, neither of them looking at me—their eyes are on Marco.
I fight back tears as the larger, bullish cop with a smashed nose and clipped haircut nods. “Evening, Marco. How is Mr. Sabatini doing?”
Marco’s hand squ
eezes my arm in warning. “Good, this is Regina Conti, Johnny’s daughter. She and Dominic will be getting married soon. Maybe give a call if you’re looking to work security for the big day.”
Both cops nod, and the bullish one touches his cap to me. “Sounds good, congratulations, Ms. Conti.”
Humiliated, I don’t fight as Marco walks me back to the SUV. “Any cop you go up to, the same thing is going to happen. They’ll hold you for Dom, and hand you over with a smile on their face. All you did is piss off Dom, and now me and Dario are going to pay for it.”
Ice slides down my spine in fear at the idea of Dominic finding out what I’ve done.
***
Regina
I’m back in the apartment at the window seat. I had considered hiding in my room but knew I was putting off the inevitable. Besides, this room soothes me in a way I can’t explain.
There is no warning of the alert from the elevator I’ve been straining to listen for. Suddenly Dominic is there, Marco and Dario beside him. Both men have their heads down. Dominic is studying me.
Why are they here?
His eyes are ice blue. “What happened?”
I shake my head, my throat tight in fear.
“Tell me what you did, princess.” His voice is smoke and fire as it burns over me.
Even though Dominic has his eyes on me, from the corner of my eye I see Marco flinch. “It wasn’t their fault. I saw a chance and I took it. I’m sorry.”
“Their one single job at this time is to keep you in sight, and in hand. They failed. You running was no surprise, it was expected. If you got more than five feet away from them, they failed me. I cannot have that.”
Turning, his attention is on Dario. “Eye or hand? What do you want broken?”
“Dominic, don’t, please. I swear I won’t do it again.”
I might as well not have spoken. Dario meets Dominic’s eyes. “Eye.”
Dominic moves so fast if I had blinked I would have missed it. The crunch of hand to bone is loud in the room. Dario staggers back against the wall, he fights not to go down. His hand against his eye, he’s gasping.
Without a second look at Dario, Dominic asks the same thing of Marco.
I never hear the word; blood is thundering in my ears as I watch Dominic smash his fist into Marco’s eye. Marco isn’t able to stay on his feet. I reel in shock at the violence in front of me.
Through my tears, Dominic is in front of me, a terrifying blur. “Are you going to hit me now too?” I fight to throw the words at him, but I’m shaking so badly they come out a garbled mess.
A hand comes up to caress my cheek, I flinch. It’s the same hand he put through the wall yesterday, the same hand he used to hurt Dario and Marco. Bile rises up in me at seeing blood on his knuckles.
“Why would I hit you, princess? I do believe I have made myself crystal clear. For the next week every time you see Marco and Dario, you’ll be reminded of what you did. The next time,” he shakes his head, “I will not be as lenient. Next time, they will pay in blood. Next time you will pay in pain.”
Trembling in fear, I can’t look at him anymore. His big hand takes mine, the hand with blood on the knuckles. He slips a ring on my left ring finger. Satisfaction is clear on his face at how it fits just right.
“It was my grandmother’s. Nonno gifted it to her on their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary for putting up with him for so many years.”
I shake my head. It feels wrong, so wrong. Everything about this moment is wrong.
Ice blue darkens to ocean as he presses a finger against my lips. Dominic presses his lips against my cheek. “Work with me, Regina, and when we get to twenty-five years you won’t regret a day. I promise you.”
Closing my eyes tight, I can’t say anything.
“Don’t run away from this, from us, princess. You belong to me. I will always come for you and I will always find you. Running will do nothing but make me angry with you. I don’t want to be angry. You don’t want me angry. Don’t do it. For both of us.”
I nod. I can’t say the words. He says what I’ve always known. He won’t stop until he finds me. Without another word, he’s gone.
For a long time all I can do is study the ring on my finger. A thick heavy platinum, if it’s art deco or Edwardian, I can’t say for sure. Intricate leaves climb up the band and tiny diamonds sparkle along the setting holding up the large European diamond that has to be at least three carats, but I think is closer to four.
Twenty-five years, she knew what her husband was, what he did and for at least twenty-five years they were happy, in love. Do Dominic and I really have a chance in hell of making it a year, let alone twenty-five?
***
Dominic
“Repeat those words again, Valdez,” I dare the man.
“My deepest apologies. We will find Taylor. My man was concerned about Benny, they have been glued together since Regina went missing. They are trying to find her and you. Benny’s father wants both of them dead. However, you did not clear Benny’s death. Taylor gave my guy the smallest window, he took the shot and missed. Please know both my man and I take this as a personal failure. Richard Taylor will be found and we will kill him. The question is, is Benny acceptable collateral damage?”
“No, I don’t need the firestorm that will rain down on me. If Alonzo wants Benny dead he’ll want to be the one who did it. Kill Taylor, I don’t care if Benny knows it was me. I just want Taylor dead.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Valdez, don’t call me unless you have good news.” I end the call fighting the urge to get violent.
I nod at Vincent. “Taylor is loose and coming after Regina. I need you to get her to the dentist, have them put in the tracker as a filling. Start making sure everyone is wearing their bulletproof vests.”
Everett is stiff in the front seat. “Everett, you want to retire again?”
A pause as he considers the question. “No, sir.”
“There’s no shame, no offense taken,” I assure the man.
“I’m sure.”
Vincent shakes his head. “Don’t worry, Everett, Taylor is too much of a pussy to come right at us. He’ll go to the girl to hide behind her skirt. I’ll make sure aside from the dentist tomorrow, Regina won’t see the light of day until Taylor is dead.”
There is no doubt Vincent is correct. Taylor is a coward. But he’s riding shotgun with Benny. Benny is no coward. The only question is does he know his father wants him dead? What was his move being beside Taylor in all of this now that they should consider Regina out of play? Because fuck it all, she’s my woman, so she should be completely off limits to everyone. Tension builds inside me as I consider how far they are willing to go to get to my woman.
Vincent ends the call with the dentist. “He can get her in tomorrow. You need to talk to Tony. He’s your weak spot, Taylor might try to get to him.”
I shake my head. “I’m too pissed. You call him. Regina can’t know, not that I ordered Taylor dead or that he’s coming after her. Make sure the men are aware to keep their mouths shut.”
Vincent nods. “It will be done.”
15
Regina
It’s been six days since we arrived in Chicago. After the day in the library I had thought I was really going to give up, but only the next day Dominic changed my mind all over again. He found me in the library, asked me about the book I was reading. It was a love story. Hearing the title, he rolled his eyes and laughed at the absurdity of the love on which the whole story hinged.
The moment told me everything I needed to know. We would be one of those plastic couples who were together out of duty, not out of want, of need for each other. As badly as I wanted him, as afraid as I was that I had already fallen in love with him, I knew I had to leave to save my sanity. I couldn’t survive loving him without ever getting his love back.
I’m not even sure how it happened, but we’re on the same schedule. While Dominic is at the club I’m working on my translati
ng. I need a few more hours of sleep than him and I hate the idea of him knowing I can’t settle unless he’s home, so I’m usually lying in bed when he comes in in the morning, with my alarm set for the same time as his in the afternoon. As soon as I hear the elevator notification I’m asleep.
When Dominic wakes up we have breakfast together, spending hours talking about his previous night and what will happen throughout his day. Normally, he would spend the morning with his father, only he’s not ready to see him yet.
It’s weird how not weird it is. I don’t feel like a prisoner. I’m not going stir-crazy considering I haven’t left the apartment since the second day. It was just supposed to be a dental cleaning but the damn dentist found a cavity. I left with a filling, a lecture to cut back on sugar and a gross tube of fluoride toothpaste.
Dominic is the perfect fucking gentleman, no more kisses, not even a simple touch. Which I’m telling myself is a good thing. Why do I miss it so much? There might not be any touching, but there is definitely mind-fucking. Every day Dominic draws me deeper into him. He smiles more, laughs, teasing as he wants to know my every thought and opinion and fear. He casually talks about our future as if it were a given.
He calls me his wife. It didn’t matter we haven’t said the words, I am wearing his ring, I’m his. As his, it his responsibility to take care of me, anything I could want or need is provided, any casual mention of something is answered, often within hours. Despite my every attempt against it, I’m falling for Dominic.
It isn’t until the afternoon of the seventh day, with our wedding just three days away, when I finally get the opening I was beginning to give up on. Of all people it’s Johnny who gives it to me. When the alert from the elevator goes off I don’t bother taking my attention from the translation I’m working on in the library. Assuming it’s Marco coming to relieve Dario. Then I hear shuffling and Johnny calling my name.
Stiffening, I consider ignoring him, except it’s childish and stupid. I get up and go into the living room. He’s on the long leather couch. I sigh, he looks awful. I see Dominic’s warning now. How the hell could I have been so blind in New York?