Merrick left her in the bakery because he got a call. That call was the hostage situation. Her irrational mind said he could have called to let her know. The sane side said he was too busy taking care of hostages and saving people to stop and text. The logical side wins.
As she followed the signs to the hospital, she mentally beat herself up. He wanted her, and she wanted him, but what if he died without knowing how much he meant to her?
The thought made her choke on a lump in her throat. Fate had been cruel before, or had it? Maybe her hook up with Red and his subsequent dismissal was fate teaching her a lesson. It was showing her what love should feel like. Red was lust mixed with need. A woman should never be so in need of affection that she was willing to accept less than she deserved.
She pulled into the nearest empty parking spot at the hospital and dashed inside the emergency room entrance. At the desk, she asked about Merrick.
“Are you family?”
“Umm, no, I’m...”
“She’s his fiancée,” a commanding voice said from behind her.
She spun around to find Merrick’s mom standing there with two cups of steaming coffee in her hand. They were the paper cups with poker hands on them that came from a vending machine. “It looks like you could use one of these.” She passed a cup to Deanna. “Follow me. I’ll take you to the waiting room.”
“Is he okay?”
Elsa shook her head, and Deanna’s stomach twisted into knots. Was that a no or a head shake of disbelief? She wished she knew Elsa better to know.
“He’s still in surgery. He got hit in a major artery and lost lots of blood.”
“Oh my God.” Her mind swam with scenes from her binge-watching Life in the ER and Grey’s Anatomy. Loss of blood could cause secondary problems like brain damage. Then there was the injury to his leg. Would he lose a limb? “How long has he been in the OR?”
“A few hours.” She led Deanna through a set of double doors and down a brightly lit hallway that smelled like antiseptic and hope. “What took you so long to get here?”
Elsa had a right to know the truth. “I didn’t know he was hurt. We had a date for six tonight, and when he didn’t show, I went to the diner to drown my sorrows in pie. It was Louise who told me.”
“You’re here now, and that’s all that matters.”
Was it? Her being in the hospital wouldn’t help Merrick’s chances. “Is there anything I can do?”
Elsa turned the corner into a small waiting room. “They are asking for blood donations. It will probably be another hour or so before we know anything.”
“Okay, I’ll be happy to donate.”
In the room were several people she recognized. Aiden was there with Marina. Lydia was sitting next to Sage, who rubbed her rounded belly.
Would she ever know the joys of motherhood? She’d take constipation and swollen ankles just to share the creation of life with a man who loved her.
Aiden rose. “I should have called you. I’m sorry, I just didn’t think about it.”
She glanced at Elsa and at Beth, who now stood beside her mother. “It’s not like I’m family.”
“Oh, honey, you’re Merrick’s girl. That makes you family.”
Deanna lowered her eyes. She couldn’t look Elsa in the face and say what needed to be said. “We lied to you. I was never his girlfriend. We just—”
Elsa pulled her to the side. “I know.” She cupped Deanna’s face and smiled. “I also know there was a spark between you too. Don’t you think a mother knows when her son isn’t honest? Merrick didn’t want me interfering.”
“He loves you too much to hurt you by being honest. It was wrong, but his intentions were good. He wanted you to be happy he was with someone. He wasn’t willing to give up his career and move back to Denver. Being with that woman would have required him to alter his life plans.”
“Sandra showed me another side of her that day. It was like seeing a live version of Jekyll and Hyde.”
Deanna thought back to that day and how her feelings were twisted with jealousy over a woman who wasn’t even a threat to her fake relationship.
“Jealousy can bring out the worst in people. I know, I wasn’t at my best that day either.” She sighed. “I owe you an apology for being dishonest.”
“Do you care for my son?”
An honest heart never lied, and hers flipped and flopped. The pace picked up, rushing blood to her face.
“I think I’m in love with your son.”
Elsa smiled. “Of course, you are. Who wouldn’t be? He’s handsome and sweet. He protects those he loves and those who simply need protection. It doesn’t hurt that he’s employed. That seems to be a problem with a lot of men these days. All this split the bill, and I’ll open my own door bullshit. Having a man dote on you doesn’t make you less of a woman.”
Beth walked up to them and stood beside Deanna. “I couldn’t help overhearing.” She giggled. “I heard you that night too. That didn’t sound like you were faking it then.”
Elsa pointed to the door. “Beth, sometimes you make me wonder. Go sit down or give your blood or get another cup of coffee. I’m talking to the future mother of my grandchildren here.”
Beth laughed. “Oh my God, just wait until Merrick finds out you’re planning his life again.” She walked in the direction of the vending machines.
“Back to you,” Elsa said. “My son looked at you like you were the sun. There was something very real there, which is why I didn’t say anything. I figured you’d work it out.”
“That was the plan. As I said, we had a date tonight, but he never showed up. I thought he’d abandoned me again.”
Elsa pulled Deanna in for a hug. “It’s not in Merrick’s DNA to abandon anyone. He may step back and let his mind work out the details, but he’ll never leave you wondering for long. Trust a mother’s instinct. He might not have told you yet, but that boy is in love with you.”
A door opened at the end of the hallway, and a doctor emerged. Elsa took a few steps forward, then backtracked to grab Deanna.
“Dr. Marsh, this is Deanna, Merrick’s fiancée. Do you have news for us?”
Deanna’s heart took off like a bee racing for nectar. If Merrick didn’t make it, she’d end up with so many regrets.
“He’s out of surgery. He had the best vascular surgeon Colorado has to offer, so I’m sure he’ll heal and be back on his feet in no time.”
A whoosh of air came from somewhere. When she looked around, she realized it came from her.
“Can we see him?” Elsa asked.
“Are you sure he’s okay?” Deanna glanced up at the doctor, looking for anything that told her he was concerned, but she was poor at reading people. If she’d been better, maybe she would have seen what Elsa did. Could Merrick truly love her?
“He’ll spend a little time in recovery, and then we’ll transfer him to a room. I’ll let you both know when he’s ready for visitors. As for being okay, he made it out of a difficult surgery. There are risks like clotting and infection we’ll be on the lookout for, but the prognosis looks good.”
Once the doctor was gone, Elsa whimpered, and her strong façade fell apart. She grabbed onto Deanna and wept.
Beth came through the door and ran to them.
“Oh God, don’t tell me he’s dead. I’ll kill him myself if he’s dead.” She joined her mother and cried.
“No, he’s okay.” Aiden walked into the hallway with Marina. The others waiting for word joined them. Before anyone else started bawling, Deanna cleared her throat. “Merrick is out of surgery and is stable. He’s in recovery and should be able to see you all in a while.”
Lydia and Sage walked over to Elsa. “I’m going to get my sister back home. She gets hangry when she doesn’t eat hourly, and Cheetos and Sour Patch Worms aren’t going to cut it. I’ll check in on him later.” They gave everyone hugs and left.
Aiden’s eyes were clouded with concern, and the dark circles beneath them spoke to his exhaust
ion. “I’ll stick around if you don’t mind, but Poppy is watching the kids, and Marina needs to get back to them.”
Elsa laid a hand on his arm. “I’m sure he’ll be grateful to see you.”
“Did the situation at the bank get resolved?” Deanna asked.
“It did. All the hostages are safe. The suspect didn’t make it. Once he opened fire, a sniper took him out.”
A shudder rushed through her. Many things could have gone differently today, but in the scheme of things, a child was safe, and Merrick was alive.
When the nurse came half an hour later and told them Merrick was awake but groggy, they all headed toward his room.
Only one person was allowed in at a time. Being the least connected person to Merrick, Deanna waited outside while Aiden, Beth, and Elsa took turns visiting him.
Elsa emerged, looking tired but happy. She held up Merrick’s keys. “I’ll be at my son’s house for a few days until he comes home.”
Deanna pulled her business card from her purse. “Call me if you need anything.”
“I will.” She kissed Deanna on the cheek. “My son is waiting for you.” She turned to Beth. “Let’s see how fast we can get to Aspen Cove. I figure if we got here in less than two hours, we should be able to make it there in less than thirty minutes.”
“Geez, Mom, you’re not supposed to be driving a hundred miles an hour. One day you’re going to lose your license for speeding.”
Elsa laughed. “I have connections.” She looked at Deanna and winked. “Don’t keep my son waiting. He needs you.”
Deanna was left alone in the hallway. She paced in front of the door for several minutes before she got the nerve to walk inside.
Merrick lay in bed. He was so still that she was sure he was sleeping.
“It’s about time you decided to visit.” He sounded like he was choking on sand.
Deanna rushed forward and took the cup from his tray, offering him a drink.
He shook his head. “That’s not what I need.”
She sat on the edge of his bed, and he winced. “I’m so sorry. I can’t seem to do anything right.” She backed away, not sure what to do.
He opened his eyes. “Come back here.” He reached for her, but his arm flopped to the bed. “Hate being so weak.”
She moved toward him. “You’re the strongest man I know. No one would ever consider you weak.”
“You make me weak.”
She furrowed her brows until an ache formed between them. “How do I make you weak?” Was this where he told her she wasn’t right for him?
“Weak in the knees, silly.” He coughed, and his face turned unnaturally pale. “Damn, that hurts. Everything hurts.” He patted the edge of the bed. “Sit with me.”
“But I’ll hurt you.”
He shook his head. “Only if you abandon me.”
Her breath caught in her throat. “Never. Haven’t you heard? We’re engaged.” She gently took a seat on the edge of his bed, careful not to jostle him in any way.
“Yes, I heard. My mother informs me that we are having two-point-five children in the next five years.”
Her shoulders shook with a suppressed laugh. She did her best to hold it in, but a squeak broke free. “What are we going to do with half a child?”
He reached out and took her hand. “I don’t know. I was hoping for four in four years, but I’ll settle for two.”
She knew he was still full of drugs, and nothing he said should be taken seriously, but there was a part of her that hoped some seed of truth was present.
“I’m so sorry you got hurt.” She cupped his face and gently ran her thumb over the bruise on his cheek.
“I’m sorry I didn’t show up for dinner.”
Tears trickled down her face. “I fed your first piece of pizza to Sherman.”
“I bet you were pissed at me.”
What she felt then didn’t matter. “Everything is okay.”
“We need to talk.” His eyes drifted closed, but he forced them to open again. “You need to know something.”
“Whatever you have to say can wait.” She wanted to bask in the glow of their fantasy life together and the possibility of having his children.
He shook his head. “No, things like this shouldn’t wait. They have to be said before it’s too late.”
She looked into his eyes, eyes that were clouded with pain. “Tell me.”
He pulled her hand, so she fell forward. Trying not to crush him, she placed her hands on either side of his head. They were mere inches from one another.
“I love you.” He rose with a scowl and touched his lips to hers for a brief kiss before he sagged back against the pillow. “You need to know that I would have shown up for the date. Tonight’s dinner was the first day of the rest of our lives, and I wouldn’t have missed it if I could have helped it.”
“I love you, too. I knew it in my heart, but my head got in the way.”
He touched the skin over her left breast. “Always think with your heart, babe.”
Hearing his nickname for her made her melt against him. Her lips found his, and they started a long and languid kiss.
Someone cleared their throat behind her. “Excuse me, I’ll need to take his vitals,” the nurse said.
Deanna gave Merrick another quick kiss and lifted from his bed. “Oh, he’s alive all right. Nothing can keep my man down.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Merrick hobbled from his bedroom to the kitchen and started a pot of coffee. His mother and Beth were coming up from Denver today to stay the weekend. She’d come up every weekend since the event. He chuckled at how he described the shooting as “the event,” like somehow it was planned like a concert or an outing.
“I would have put the coffee on,” Deanna said. She sidled up next to him and gave him a kiss. Ever since that first day in the hospital, she hadn’t left his side.
“Deanna, I don’t need you to make the coffee or cook my dinner or do my laundry. Elsa Buchanan raised me, and she taught me how to be self-sufficient.”
He watched her shoulders sag. “I get it. You don’t need me.”
He pushed off the counter to face her. The weight shift sent a jolt of pain down his leg. The doctor said that would be the case while the tissue healed, but he was certain Merrick would make a full recovery.
“Babe, I need you, but not for those things. I need you to be my friend, to love me no matter what, and to forgive me when I’m an idiot. While I like that you want to cook my dinner, clean my house, and do my laundry, those things aren’t what make me love you.”
The corners of her lips lifted. “Say it again.”
This was a game she played, but he’d learned to play his own. “I don’t need you to—”
She covered his mouth with her hand. “You know what I mean.”
Yes, he did. She needed to hear the words. “How about I show you how much I love you?”
He grabbed her hand and led her toward his room. “Merrick, don’t forget about what the doctor said.”
He knew the doctor told him to take it easy on the leg, but Dr. Marsh didn’t have Deanna lying next to him each night. It was like putting a piece of chocolate cake in front of a dieter and making them look at it each day and never take a bite. Merrick had willpower, but not when it came to his woman.
“He said all things in moderation. Celibacy is not moderation.”
She rushed ahead of him, stripping off her shirt along the way. “Very true.” She looked at the clock on the nightstand. “When is your mom getting here?”
He laughed. “Not for an hour.”
For the next forty-five minutes, they made love, and it was love. No other woman made him feel the way Deanna did. He always thought it was his job to protect and serve, but it was okay to let someone else defend him too. Deanna was like a pit bull when it came to her loyalty and fierce devotion.
They were almost dressed when Sherman barked. He had settled into Merrick’s place without any troubl
e. All the little guy needed was kibble, a place to run outside, and a lap to snuggle in at night.
“The watchdog has spoken. Your mom must be early.” She pulled on her shirt and slipped her feet into her shoes. “I’ll get the door. Are you okay to dress yourself?”
He was dreading this visit. He knew what it was about. His mother had been hinting at him to leave the force. “Once is bad luck, two is an omen,” she said. He’d been waiting for Deanna to say something too. She’d been tight-lipped about “the event.” Somehow avoiding it made it not real.
For the last week, they’d lived in a bubble of bliss, but today everything would change. Would he give it all up if Deanna asked him? She once said that every day a person walked out of the house could be their last, but that was before they fell in love. Love did crazy things to the heart and mind. Love could make a sane man crazy and a crazy man sane. Love was an equalizer or a disruptor. It was too soon to know which of those it would be for him.
Down the hallway, he heard his mother enter and greet Deanna. His sister’s voice followed close behind.
He tugged on his shirt and slipped on his sweatpants. They were the least constricting and most comfortable of the clothes he had to wear.
Trying to hide his limp, he put on a smile that wasn’t hard to fake because he’d just finished making love to the most beautiful woman in the world.
“Hey, Mom.” He walked up to her and kissed her on the cheek. Turning to his sister, he knuckled the top of her head. “Hey, brat.” It was funny how he still viewed Beth as his little sister when she was two years older than Deanna.
“Hey, gimp,” Beth said. “Where should I put the groceries?”
“Follow me,” Deanna led her to the kitchen. Sherman tagged along, hoping something would fall from the bag. He loved the visits from Beth because she always had a treat in her pocket for him.
“We stopped by the Corner Store. I swear that young woman who runs it looks familiar.”
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