Donut Leave Me (One of the Boys)

by Teresa Crumpton

  This time he full-out laughs. “Yes, Piper was right. I’ll let you in on a secret. She’s not off the hook, either.” He gestures at Aunt Piper. “Why don’t we go sit with my friend over there and wait for news? Sound like a plan?”

  “Yes.” The three of us walk over to a pretty dark-haired woman sitting next to a window.

  My dad turns to my aunt and says, “Piper, you might remember my friend, Calla.” Aunt Piper nods and shakes the woman’s hand. “Ella, Calla is my friend and coworker. She owns Belladonna, the restaurant where I work,” my dad tells me.

  “Hi Miss Calla.” I shake her hand and take a seat one space down from her.

  “Hi Ella. Piper.” Miss Calla nods at each of us, watching my dad, Aunt Piper, and me.

  “Are you two dating?” Aunt Piper asks as she sits next to me.

  Miss Calla starts to cough.

  Dad’s eyebrows furrow. “No, Calla was the only one that could come with me and there not be any blood shed. Plus, Nessa hadn’t even arrived at Belladonna when I left, and trust me, you don’t want Adam here.”

  “Nessa’s going to be livid isn’t she?” Aunt Piper asks.

  “What do you think?” my dad responds, taking the seat between me and Miss Calla.

  “Aunt Piper, can I have one of the donuts you brought?” I look back and forth between my aunt and my dad.

  “Sure Sweetheart.” She pulls out a rectangular white cardboard box from her bag.

  Lifting the lid, I peer in. Aunt Piper brought an assortment of our favorite donuts. I pick one of the glazed ones and take a bite.

  The fluffy, sugary donut tastes amazing. This is pure happiness in a little round treat. I’ve missed the weekend donut runs with Mom. Swallowing my bite, I face Aunt Piper.

  “Hey Aunt Piper? Why did you bring donuts from our favorite donut shop?”

  “This morning after your mom met with Forest, she called and told me she wanted me here this week to help when you and your dad would meet. I offered to bring donuts up since your mom said y’all hadn't found a place here yet for your weekly fix. The three of us were going find one this weekend.” Aunt Piper’s small smile is not quite brightening her face.

  “So you were already driving up here today?” I take another bite.

  “Yep. As soon as I finished practice, I started my drive. I was going to stay until Sunday afternoon,” she responds, holding the box out to my dad and his friend, Calla, who has stayed quiet on his other side.

  Forest

  Shit. Piper drove up to help Hallie, and most especially Ella, meet me. I haven't even had a chance to get over my shock of learning I have a daughter. Hallie and Piper were planning for me to see Ella one day this week. My mind is still reeling with these facts.

  Waiting for news on Hallie is nerve-racking. With Ella here, I can't ask Piper everything I want to. Though from the looks she gives me, she knows a long-overdue discussion is coming. Ella’s homework is spread out on the floor as she diligently works on finishing. I’m a little shocked she has homework already. I’d thought school just started.

  A man in scrubs ventures toward our little group as we’re the only people who remain in the waiting room.

  “Mr. Jenson? I’m doctor Scott. I am the primary surgeon on Ms. Hartley's case.” The doctor pauses and glances down at Ella, who's now sitting up watching him closely.

  “Hey Ella? Will you walk with me to get something to drink?” Calla sits forward, holding out a hand as she speaks to my daughter.

  “I want…” Ella starts to say, tears glistening in her eyes. “Yes, ma’am.” She reaches for Calla's hand, wiping one eye.

  “Thank you,” I mouth to her.

  With her free hand, Calla squeezes my shoulder and walks my daughter away. Doctor Scott watches as my friend leads Ella out of earshot.

  “In the documentation the police found with Ms. Hartley, she listed you as her ‘in case of emergency’ contact, along with a Miss Piper Jenson.”

  “I’m Piper,” my sister speaks up.

  “As I’m sure you both know, Ms. Hartley was already very sick. Because of her illness, all we are able to do for Ms. Hartley is stabilize her enough so her family can say goodbye. She’s on life support and probably won't make it through the night. There’s a DNR on file for her. As soon as Ms. Hartley’s settled in ICU, one of the nurses will be down to take you to her room.”

  “DNR? What is that, and what does it mean?” I interrogate the surgeon, not understanding all of his medical alphabet soup.

  “It’s a ‘Do Not Resuscitate’ order in her record that she had signed previously. It means that if her heart or other organs give out or shut down, we won’t attempt to bring her back. We have to let her go.”

  Piper gasps at this devastating news, and I have to grab for her quickly and hold her upright as she begins to collapse to the floor. I stabilize Piper and refocus on the doctor.

  “Thank you, Dr. Scott. When my daughter gets back we’ll want to spend as much time with Hallie as possible,” I inform him as I’m attempting to gather the scattered pieces of my heart and soul from that huge emotional bomb he just dropped on us.

  As Dr. Scott briskly strides out of the waiting room, I pull my sister into my arms, letting her sob on my shoulder. No matter how pissed I am at her for not telling me about Ella, I can't help but comfort her. She’s still my little sister, and she’s hurting. While I want to kick her ass, I understand that Hallie, her sorority sister and best friend, is like family to her. Hell, considering our age difference, I see why she feels closer to Hallie than to Nessa or myself. Tonight, I only need to think about her and my daughter. They need to grieve, and for better or worse, I have to be their rock.

  I can’t lose my daughter, and Piper is the only person in my family that can help me protect Ella. She’s also the only one who can help me bridge the years I’ve missed. Plus, Mom might kill me if I actually hurt my baby sister.

  Piper wipes her tears before stepping away from me to clean up Ella’s school work. I move to join her, but she holds up a hand to stop me.

  “Let me do this. It will keep my mind on something other than losing my best friend.” She sniffles. “I knew this day was coming, but I thought I’d prepared myself better than this.” Piper plops onto the floor, more tears billowing in her eyes.

  “Piper, I’m sorry you’re losing your best friend. I can’t imagine...” my words cut off. Piper knows I have no fucking clue how she’s feeling right now, and I don’t need to try to explain it. “While I am still pissed that you didn’t tell me about Ella, I’m not going to push you away. We will have words, but now isn’t the time for that. My daughter needs you. She needs someone stable in her life, someone she’s known all her life, as we move forward. And like it or not, you are family, and I do love you.” I squat down next to her and hand over Ella’s books, folders, and papers.

  Piper stares at me, wiping away more tears. “I love you, too. And thanks for not pushing me away. You have every right to. When this is all over, I’ll take any punishment you want to give.” She reaches for me and tries to push me over.

  “Aunt Piper?” My daughter’s voice is tentative behind me.

  “Sweetheart, your dad and I need to talk to you,” my sister tells my sweet little girl, and my heart wants to break in two.

  “Mommy didn’t make it did she?” Ella asks, her lip trembling and tears filling her eyes.

  I grab her hand and pull her tiny body into me. “Baby girl, she’s still with us. But not for long, I’m afraid. The doctor says we need to say our goodbyes.” She wraps her arms around me. “How about I carry you as we go see your mom?”

  “Yes please, Daddy,” Ella’s voice quivers. “Is it okay that I call you that?” Tears stream down her face as she asks, and I wrap her even tighter in my arms.

  “Yes baby. And as soon as I’m able, we will make it official. First, lets make sure your mom gets to hold you one last time.” Ella lays her head on my shoulder as I pick her up and stand. She lock
s her ankles around my hips once I’m upright.

  Calla steps closer, side hugging me and rubbing Ella’s back. “Remember what I said Ella.”

  Ella nods, and Calla steps away from me.

  “I’m going to go get everyone some food and let the guys know what’s going on. I’ll be back in an hour. Text me with what room you’re in.”

  “Thanks Calla,” I reply and start to head for the counter.

  “It’s what families are for. You know that,” she responds and helps Piper off the ground.

  “Mr. Jenson, Dr. Scott wanted me to inform you that Ms. Hartley is on the fifth floor. They said she’d be in room 501, but that may have changed once they got her up there,” the sweet lady behind the desk informs us.

  “Thank you. We’ll head up there now.” With my daughter in my arms and my sister by my side, we move to the elevator and prepare for our lives to be turned upside down.

  Chapter 6

  Forest

  The last few days have been a living hell. Thank God Hallie had everything worked out for when the cancer took her from Ella. If she hadn’t had the forethought to take care of so many things, I don’t know what I’d have done. It’s been five days since Hallie passed, and besides finalizing all her wishes, I’ve gotten the DNA test, and now we’re waiting on the results. Once Piper explained everything to Nessa and our parents, and pulled out her own DNA test results that she’d had done a few years back to help make a case that I was, in fact, Ella’s father, the outright name-calling and fighting stopped. At least within hearing distance of Ella.

  As soon as my parents saw my daughter, they welcomed her into the family unconditionally, as did Nessa. Though she still shoots Piper the evil eye on occasion and has a few choice words to say. Her niece has proven she’s a Jenson too, as she shoots the evil eye back at her Aunt Nessa. The expression Ella gives is the same one I’ve seen cross both Nessa and Piper’s faces, along with my mother’s. She’s having no problems fitting right in.

  So far, today has been a complete blur, and I’m so glad I have family and friends that want to help. I haven't let Ella out of my sight since Hallie died, so she’s missed a few days of school. Thankfully, the school has been extremely understanding. Turns out Ella’s teacher, Ms. Scott, is married to Dr. Scott, so she's been sending me Ella’s homework.

  Ella has gone to Belladonna with me twice, and everyone there loves her. I think Calla wants to keep her. Ella seems to brighten Calla's mood, and she’s been able to make some delicious meals for us. Though she hasn't tried anything new or difficult yet.

  Maybe all Calla has needed was something to kick start her mojo. I don't mind if Ella is the one to help.

  I’ve even seen a change in Wes, thank fuck for that. I’ve wondered when he’d finally pull his head out of his ass.

  “Mr. Jenson? It's time,” the attendant calls.

  Nudging Ella, she pulls my earbuds out of her ears, looking up at me with tears filling her eyes.

  Getting to my feet, I straighten my pants and hold my hand out to her. “Let's go baby girl. We need to pay our respects to you mom.”

  Her bottom lip trembles. “Okay, Daddy.”

  I love that she already calls me Daddy. There hasn't been a time since we met that she hasn't. Once this is over, I’ll need to thank Piper for that, as well. I know she’s the one that told Ella all about me.

  Once Ella puts my phone in her tiny purse and neatly wraps the headphones so they fit inside it too, she grabs my hand, and we walk into the viewing room the funeral home set up for Hallie. The room is filled with all different types and colors of flowers, with a few plants thrown in. Ella’s fingers tighten around my hand, and I know I’ll do everything I can to protect her. I glance down at her to see her sweet little face fighting back tears the best she can.

  I sink down on one knee in front of her. “Ella, Sweetheart, are you sure you want to do this? We can wait. And if you don’t want to wait, it’s really okay to cry.”

  “I want to see Mommy, and I want to be a big girl, too. But Daddy, I do want to cry.” She steps into my arms and does just that.

  “It's okay to cry baby girl. No one's going to say anything. In fact, you’ll see a lot of people crying today and tomorrow,” I tell her into her hair, wrapping my arms around her slight body.

  “You’re not crying Daddy?” Ella pulls slightly back from me.

  “I didn't know your mom well, Sweetheart, and I’m being strong for you. It's my job to be strong for you, and it will always be my job, even when I’m really old and gray. If I would’ve known about you as a baby, I would’ve been strong for you then too.” Tears continue to stream down her cute face. “Let's go see your mom. I’ll be right by your side.”

  Ella steps back, but I pull her close to me, picking her up as I stand. We make the long walk to the casket and hover there until voices can be heard outside.

  “Do you want a minute with your mom alone?” Ella nods, and I put her down. “Let me get the stool for you.”

  She sniffles and wipes her eyes and nose with the back of her hand. I take a few steps away from the casket and grab the footstool and Kleenex. When I move back to Ella, I pass the tissue to her before placing the stool in the ideal spot for her to stand on.

  “Thanks, Daddy.” She leans into me for a side hug, and I kiss the top of her head, letting my lips rest there for a moment.

  “I’m going to go wait right over there.” I gesture to a spot behind her, and she turns to look. “Just call me if you need me.”

  I walk away, letting Ella have as much time with her mom as possible. Before I know it, more family members are entering the room, but Ella doesn't move. She remains at her mother’s side, proving just how strong she really is.

  As friends and family make their way to Hallie’s casket, Ella comes over to me, taking my hand. She tugs twice, and I bend down to her level.

  “Yes, baby girl?”

  “Thanks, Daddy.” I wipe the tears from her cheeks and haul her into my arms.

  “Anytime, Sweetheart.” I kiss her cheek and squeeze her tight, and she returns the gesture.

  “Now, do you want me to hold you or let you stand so you can greet your Mom’s friends and family?” I question, making eye contact with her.

  “Will you stay next to me the whole time?” There’s a quiver in her young voice, and a trembling lip too.

  “I won’t leave your side,” I assure her.

  “Then I’ll stand and hold your hand. You’re sure that’s okay?” She gauges my reaction. I get that she’s still unsure of me, not to mention she just lost her mom, and she’s off kilter.

  “Deal.” I kiss the top of her head and stand. She quickly grabs my hand, and we greet my parents together.

  Piper follows behind my parents, with Nessa and Adam bringing up the rear. After my family, everyone from Belladonna’s kitchen comes to give Ella their condolences. She’s truly making a wonderful impression on my friends and co-workers, and each and every one of them gives her their respect when they stop and hug her.

  The rest of the line is filled with Hallie’s friends and estranged family, I learn, as Ella greets them and introduces me. About three hours in, I’m beat to hell, and I can only imagine what toll this day is taking on Ella. Suddenly, her little body straightens, and there’s this new energy about her. To her right stands a group of kids whispering, probably trying not to get in trouble. Behind them are more football players, and by the looks the players are giving the kids, I’d venture to guess the kids belong to them. And I think I spot Calla’s brother, Ben, mixed in with this crowd.

  I thought he played for a different team? I wonder why Calla didn’t say anything about him being in town. Normally we talk about it in the kitchen. Though every time Ben comes in, Wes gets in a mood. Fucker just needs to tell Calla he’s into her and take the beat-down Ben will give him like a man.

  “Daddy,” Ella says pulling my hand, and I squat to her level. “These are my friends from back home. Devin,
Chad, Jacob, Davan, Reagan, Ezra, and Serena. Y’all, this is my dad.” Her voice has a hint of excitement to it, and I’m not sure if it’s from seeing her friends or finally telling people she has a dad.

  “It’s nice to meet you, sir,” the kids repeat, one after another, some almost talking over the others.

  All seven of them huddle around Ella, forcing me to let her hand go so they can engulf her in a group hug. I rise as they comfort my girl.

  My girl. I’m not sure I’ll ever want to stop saying that.

  “Come on kids. Let’s let Ella finish greeting all these people. Tomorrow y’all can cheer her up,” one of the biggest guys I’ve ever seen tells them. Then he bends down and picks her up in a bear hug.

  “Uncle Chris, it’s okay.” Ella holds the man tight.

  God can my little girl be any stronger? She’s comforting this huge football player when all he wants to do is comfort her.

  Chris puts her back on her feet and holds out a hand to me.

  “Forest, right?” He’s waiting for me to shake his hand.

  I nod, taking his hand with my free one.

  “Piper told us a lot about you, especially when Hallie said she was going to finally tell you about Ella. On behalf of myself and the team, I want to say thank you for being here for Ella. We know it can’t be easy finding out you have a child seven years later. I know we don’t know you, but seeing you here with Ella, you seem like a real stand-up guy. If y’all need anything let us know, and if possible, could you bring her down every once in a while so we can see her?”

  “I’m just glad I have her in my life now. Of course I’ll bring her down. Or maybe her and Piper can have a girls’ weekend once a month when Piper heads back,” I reply, and it seems to satisfy him and the guys behind him.

  After Chris, the line moves pretty much the same way for the rest of the viewing. By 8:30 PM Ella is about to pass out standing up, so we head to my place, grabbing dinner on the way. We eat, and she is out as soon as she finishes her tacos.