by Denise Carbo
I wrap my arm around his shoulders and kiss the side of his head. “I’m feeling much better.”
Tommy plops into the chair across from me. “Does that mean Luke’s leaving? We were going to have another Nerf war.”
The priorities of a ten-year-old boy. “That’s up to Luke. He’s already been here helping us out. Speaking of which, both of you need to thank him.”
They both turn to Luke in the kitchen. “Thank you.”
Luke carries over a cup of tea and sets it in front of me. “It’s been a blast, boys.” He high fives them both. “We’ll still have our rematch. How else will I annihilate you again?”
Tommy grins and jumps up. “Come on Timmy, we have to strategize.”
The two disappear around the corner. Luke slides into the chair Tommy just vacated. “Strategize? I suppose you taught them that?”
“Of course, you can’t have a proper battle without a strategy.”
Separating the top of the muffin, I take a hesitant bite and wait to see if my stomach will tolerate the food.
“So, did Franny and Mitch stay long?”
“No, they stood outside. Mitch introduced himself as he handed over the box. Franny stood on the walk and asked where you were and who I was. When I told her you were sick and upstairs sleeping, she came up the steps intending to check on you, but Mitch stopped her and told her to let you rest. The boys popped their heads out then and said hi as they peered into the box and spotted the bakery boxes. Your friend asked them a few veiled questions about what they had been up to and if I was taking care of them and you properly while she told them the treats she’d brought them.”
I wince. “She wasn’t too hard on you, was she?”
“No, she was just looking out for you. She wants you to call her when you’re feeling better.”
“Okay.”
“Your parents stopped by this morning.”
Oh shit!
I halt with the piece of muffin hanging in midair from my frozen fingers. “My parents were here?”
“I’m surprised you didn’t wake up when your mother checked on you.”
“She checked on me?”
“Yup, after they introduced themselves and asked who I was, she pushed past me and marched up the stairs while she told your father to check on the boys.”
Scrunching my face, I squeeze my eyes shut, and then peek one open. “Do I need to apologize? Did she say something rude?”
My mother is the sweetest woman on the planet—until she gets riled. Thankfully, it doesn’t happen often.
Luke chuckles and I open both eyes.
“She was fine. They both were. It had to be disconcerting finding a strange man opening their daughter’s door. They insisted on taking the boys home with them, but after the boys vociferously announced their displeasure—they relented. We had been ready to have our first battle and they didn’t want to miss out. Your parents stayed and watched them for an hour while I went next door to shower and change.”
I’m sure I’ll be getting an ear full later and will have a laundry list of questions to answer.
“Anyone else stop by?”
“No, those were the only visitors.” Luke gets up and plucks a pastry from the box and takes a bite on his way back to the table.
“I feel like I owe you hazard pay or something.”
The corner of his mouth quirks into a smirk. “I’ll come up with a detailed list along with the various forms of payment expected for each.”
I glance over my mug as I take a sip of tea. “Should I be worried?”
“I think the word you’re looking for is anticipation.”
It’s my turn to smirk. “Confident, aren’t you?”
The smirk stretches into a grin. “On this I am.”
I swear I can see his eyes heat as his gaze meanders over me. A stirring starts low in my stomach which has nothing to do with illness.
“Is it time?”
I glance over my shoulder. Tommy and Timmy are standing outside the kitchen with their Nerf guns.
Luke rises and laces his fingers together and stretches until they crack. “Bring it on.”
Tommy races over and hands him a gun.
“What, none for me?”
Luke grins down at me as Timmy disappears into the living room and returns with a gun for me.
I slide the barrel back with a snap. “Let’s do this.”
Chapter 23
Snow coats the ground and my back deck. We must have gotten at least six inches accumulation last night. I need to drag out the snow shovel and clear the walkway and driveway. Good thing I got up early.
There’s a knock at the front door. I glance at my watch, it’s only a few minutes past eight o’clock—too early for Ryan to pick up the boys. I set my coffee mug down on the counter and walk to the front door.
Stopping along the way to peek out the window in the dining area, I see Ryan. Is he trying to make up for last week by being early? We’ve barley spoken all week when he’s called to talk to the boys.
His gaze scans me when I open the door. “Hi.”
“Hi. You’re early. The boys are still getting dressed.”
“I thought we could talk.”
Oh boy, does that mean he wants to talk about Luke being here last week to watch the boys? It’s too much to hope he’s going to apologize for bailing on me. It’s too early in the morning for this.
“Make it quick because I have shoveling to do.” I shut the door behind him. “You want a coffee?” I walk towards the kitchen to grab my mug. I need the caffeine.
“I’ll do it.”
I stop and look over my shoulder. “You want to make yourself a coffee?”
“No, I mean I’ll shovel the snow.”
He’s going to clear the driveway and walk for me? Well hell, he must feel really guilty over last weekend. Maybe he’s not going to argue about Luke after all. Could I get him to shovel the snow off the back deck too? If it’s not done and it snows again, it’ll just get heavier.
“That’s nice of you.” I hold up my mug. “Coffee?”
He shakes his head. “How about if the boys and I drive you to work this morning so we can pick you up when you’re done?”
“Um…why?”
“I thought it would be nice to have family time tonight.”
I lean against the counter and sip my coffee.
“We could go bowling or catch a movie. It’s been a while. The kids love bowling.”
He’s right, it has been a while. We used to make sure we scheduled family time at least once a month so the boys know that even though we’re divorced, we’re still a family.
“Sure, we can do that. It’s a good idea.”
“Great. I’ll go shovel so you won’t be late.”
Ryan walks over to the door.
“Wait. Aren’t we going to talk about last weekend and the fact that Luke watched the boys without us discussing it beforehand?”
I don’t want it to fester and worry about the conversation, I’d rather have it out in the open.
Ryan turns back and plants his hands on his hips. “You did what you had to do because I didn’t do my part. I’m sorry. I was a dick for leaving you in the lurch like that.”
Am I dreaming? If you question whether you’re dreaming while dreaming doesn’t that mean you’re not dreaming? Sort of like people who are crazy don’t think they are?
“Thanks, that means a lot.”
He nods and then turns and goes outside. I open my mouth to call him back to tell him where the shovel is but stop. He knows where it is. It’s the same place it always was. The same place he used to keep it when he lived here.
* * *
The smack of the bowling ball knocking over a pin echoes through the building. Timmy got the spare. He does a victory dance shaking his hips side to side and swinging his arms in front and then behind him.
After jumping up to high five him, I sit back in one of the chairs in the semi-circle behind the sco
re board. Ryan adds the score and it pops up on the overhead projector.
“Last round boys, then we’ll grab something to eat and play another game if you’re good.” He glances over for confirmation and I nod.
I win by a single point and take a bow. The boys grudgingly congratulate me and we gather our things.
We order a pizza which is quickly devoured. The boys race over to the small arcade dividing the restaurant from the bowling lanes while Ryan and I remain in the booth drinking our sodas.
“This was a good idea, I’m glad you suggested it. The boys are having a blast.”
“Me too.” Ryan rests his arm on the back of the booth. “How’s work at the bakery?”
“Good. Real good, actually. I’m taking on more and more responsibilities and I’m designing a new website for the bakery.”
“Didn’t know you knew how to do that.”
“Neither did I.” I smile and shrug. “The course I took gave me all the basics and I’ve been reading a bunch of articles and watching videos about it. It’s fun.”
“That could lead to a whole new career for you. I imagine there’s a high demand for website designers.”
“I don’t know about that, I’m just concentrating on the bakery.” I take a sip of my soda and glance over to check on the boys playing a game. “What about you? How’s work?”
“My boss recommended me for a management position in the home office.”
“In Boston?”
“Yeah.”
“Wow, that’s…that’s great. Congratulations.”
“I haven’t gotten yet. I still have to interview for the spot.”
“Still, your boss recommended you, that must carry weight.”
“It should.”
Ryan might move to Boston. Is that why he wanted to have this family time? Get some in before he moves, and then what? How often will he see the boys?
He leans forward and clasps his hands on the table. “If I get this job, it could mean a lot of opportunities open up for me—for us.”
“Us?”
“It’s more money for sure, but there’s a hell of a lot more growth potential at the home office. If you want to take courses on web design, or whatever, there are tons of colleges in Boston to choose from. Or if you don’t, and want to be a stay-at-home mom, you could do that too.”
“Ryan, what are you saying?”
“I’m saying I want us to give it another try. You, me, and the boys, together as a family.”
I drop back against the cushion of the bench, staring. He gazes back with a hopeful expression on his face. He’s serious.
I glance over at the boys and back.
“I know it’s a lot to take in. I’ve been thinking about this all week. We’re good together. We were so young before. We can make it work this time.”
“Geez, Ryan, you need to slow down. Let me wrap my brain around this. First you tell me you might be moving to Boston, and then you say you want to reconcile?”
“Boston is just a possibility, but I still want to give us a chance either way.”
“I don’t know what to say.” My thoughts scramble. I don’t even know what to think. Ryan and I back together?
“The kids would be ecstatic.”
My head snaps up. “You haven’t said anything to them, have you?!?”
“No, of course not.”
“Your parents would be happy too.”
Mom would throw a party. She interrogated me about Luke for almost an hour. I’m surprised she didn’t demand documentation from him when she found him at the house. I didn’t even tell her we went on a date. As far as she knows, he’s only a friend and neighbor. She wanted to know how Ryan would feel about a strange man in the house taking care of the boys. Did Luke’s presence help to prompt Ryan’s renewed interest? Is he jealous? Mom has never accepted the divorce. She’s told me she prays every night for us to get back together. If she finds out what Ryan is proposing, I’ll never hear the end of it. She won’t understand my hesitation. His parents will be horrified.
“Yours won’t.”
“Why do you say that? Of course they would.”
I tilt my head to the side and stare. “Give me a break, Ryan. Your parents have never been fans of our relationship and me especially.”
“They’ve done nothing but welcome you.”
“Yes, politely and at a firm distance.”
He shrugs. “They’re not the overly affectionate people your family is.”
I shake my head. “It doesn’t matter, that’s not the point. You haven’t said anything to them, have you?”
“No, not yet.”
“Don’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’ve dropped this on me and I can’t even think straight. I need time and I don’t want to feel pressured. And I definitely don’t want the added worry about you telling your parents hanging over my head.”
“Okay.”
I rub my forehead. “Ryan, I don’t get this. Why now?”
“I told you. My life might be changing and it made me think. I don’t want it to happen without you and the boys. I want you to be part of it.”
“I can’t…I can’t think about this right now. Promise not to say anything to the boys, or anyone else we know.”
“Okay, when can you think about it?”
“I don’t know, but it’s not going to be an instant decision. Give me a few days, at least.”
“I’m meeting a client Monday morning in Granite Cove. Why don’t we go to lunch just the two of us?”
“That’s only two days away, I said a few.”
“We can talk about it, or not. We can just have lunch as friends if you’re not ready to discuss it.”
“You’re being very accommodating.”
“I’m trying here. All I’m asking is you to try too.”
Lunch is harmless. At least I’d have some time to think about this and figure out how I feel. “Fine, Monday.”
“Great, thank you.” He glances up. “Here come the boys. We promised them another game.”
“Right.” I turn and smile as they slide into the booth and sip at their neglected sodas.
“Are we playing another game?”
“We sure are. Let’s see if one of us can defeat your mother.”
Tommy raises his hands in the air. “It’s going to be me.”
“We’ll see about that. I have to defend my title of reigning champion.”
“You only won by one point, Mom. I don’t think that makes you champion.”
I give Timmy a mock glare. “Of course it does. It doesn’t matter how many points you win by.”
The boys scramble up and bounce in place.
“Let’s go, champ.” Ryan stands and holds out a hand to me.
I place my hand in his and let him help me from the red vinyl booth.
What the hell am I going to do?
Chapter 24
The wooden stairs leading to Lucinda’s apartment thump beneath my running feet like an off-rhythm bass drum. I dropped the boys off for a playdate on the way here and their friend’s mom had been in a chatty mood. She regaled me with comments and descriptions about the latest school fundraiser before segueing into a teary-eyed complaint over her sister-in-law’s thoughtless question asking her what she did all day as a stay-at-home mom of school-age kids.
After biting back the suggestion to punch her sister-in-law in the face the next time she asks that question, I rubbed Jill’s back and instead told her to smile politely and then list all the jobs she performs each and every day for no pay and little or no appreciation. We made our own list which started with chef, maid, nurse, personal assistant, accountant, teacher, and ended it a few dozen titles later with event organizer, financier, and travel agent. By the time I left, we were both laughing, but then she thanked me for commiserating with her even though I was a working mom.
I’ve been working since the kids started school, but I still thought of myself as a stay
-at-home mom because that’s what I was for the first five years of their lives. Except for the hour between the time they get home from school and I get home from work, I’m home for them.
I grip the railing on the landing at the top of the stairs to catch my breath and gain my composure after the sprint from my car parked a couple blocks away. The view of the lake is stunning from up here. Most of the cove is visible. The marina is empty of boats and docks. With winter approaching, everything has been pulled from the water before the lake turns to ice. If I lived up here, I would want to extend this landing into a proper deck so I could place a few chairs to sit and enjoy the view.
The door opens behind me and I glance over my shoulder. Lucinda stands in the open doorway dressed in a royal blue cable-knit sweater and jeans. She smiles and then shivers when a blast of icy wind off the lake blows over both of us.
“What are you doing standing out here? You’ll turn into an icicle.”
She gives me half a hug before steering me inside her apartment.
“I was admiring your view.”
“It’s great isn’t it? I’m trying to figure out how I can fit a chair there for warmer months.”
“Maybe you can convince Franny to make an addition?”
“Ooh, I like the way you think.”
“Uh oh, that sounds like trouble. Sign me up.” Rebecca strolls over and pushes a glass of wine in my hands and clinks her own glass against it in a toast.
“What are you guys conniving over here?” Franny grins as she stops next to Lucinda and bumps her shoulder with her own.
“Olivia has the wonderful idea you should renovate and put a nice big deck so I can entertain outside.”
“I don’t think I used quite those words or made it sound so expansive.”
Lucinda waves a hand in my direction. “Details.”
“Actually, I want to put in outdoor seating for the bakery which might mean moving the stairs to the apartment so it’s not entirely out of the question.”
Lucinda claps her hands together. “Excellent. When can we start planning?”
Franny shakes her head and laughs. “I need to talk to my accountant first. Besides, you won’t be able to enjoy it until spring rolls around.”