Prodigal Son © 2022 by Jay Crownover
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means without prior written permission.
A letter of copyright has been applied for through the Library of Congress.
All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. For information, address Jay Crownover LLC, 1250 Grass Valley Dr. Colorado Springs, Colorado 80906.
Publisher’s Note: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are a product of the author’s imagination. Locales and public names are sometimes used for atmospheric purposes. Any resemblance to actual people, living or dead, or to businesses, companies, events, institutions, or locales is completely coincidental.
Cover design by the incomparable Hang Le: http://www.byhangle.com
Cover photo by: Michelle Lancaster
Model: Tommy D
Editing and formatting by: Elaine York, Allusion Publishing
Copy editing by: Bethany Salminen, Bethany Edits, www.bethanyedits.net
Foreword
Marked Men Family Tree
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Epilogue
Thank You
Fortunate Son - Prologue
Fortunate Son - Chapter 1
Acknowledgements
About the Author
Other Books by Jay Crownover
This story is for all of those whose quirks are a little something more and who have had to deal with wonky internal wiring. However, I really wrote Remy specifically as my own little hope and wish for the person in my life whom she reminds me so much of. Never in a million years would they believe me if I told them I dedicated a whole novel to them…
Love is hard.
Hello friends and followers!
I’m back with another 2nd Generation book. I didn’t plan for these kids to be as endearing as they are, and I ended up getting as invested in them as I was with their parents.
But first things first, I don’t often include a trigger/content warning for my books. I feel that I typically write about everyday struggles, which aren’t particularly traumatic to most in my little writer’s mind.
This book is a bit different. Remy is dealing with some major mental health issues. There are immediate references to self-harm and suicidal ideation.
And as a couple, Remy and Hyde both deal with what it might be like to face the loss of a child, so if these situations might make you uncomfortable, you have been forewarned.
If you or someone you know is struggling, please reach out for help.
National Suicide Hotline: 800-273-8255
Remy has borderline personality disorder, which is a mental health condition I’m very familiar with. I don’t have it, but I spent my entire life in the shadow of someone who does, and that person’s struggles very much shaped who I am as a person and the life I’ve lived. They affected my relationships throughout my life in varying degrees and definitely shaped the way I love and accept love from others. Their story isn’t mine to tell. And I don’t think it’s fair to divulge any personal information or details that justify me being able to write this kind of character correctly, but I will say that I’m very aware of what it is like to live adjacent to borderline personality disorder—so I pulled from very personal experiences while bringing Remy to life. She’s always been one of my favorite characters, but now she holds an even more special place in my creative heart because, in a perfect world, the way Remy thrives and finds herself is what I wish for the person in my life who faces her same struggles.
And just to be on the safe side, I sent this book through a mental health sensitivity edit before publishing. I asked someone whom I consider an expert on how to talk about mental health, and how mental health should be portrayed, to give Prodigal Son a read through. Now, that doesn’t mean she’s going to find each and every item that might trigger someone. People come from all different walks of life; they have different experiences and issues. What one reader might take offense to won’t even be a blip on another’s radar. So, she made sure there are no major red flags and that I’m not inadvertently doing more harm than good with any of the scenarios Remy faces throughout the book. My beta team also has a wide array of smart, talented women. Several of them also have personal experience with a variety of mental health disorders. I’m confident that, for the majority of readers, I’ve done a good job making sure Remy’s disorder is accurately portrayed, and for the few for whom she’s a miss, that’s totally fair. Like I said, I can only write what it’s like to be next to borderline personality disorder, not what it’s like to actually live with it. I just felt like this year especially, since it was so hard for me personally, I wanted to feature a character who embodies how difficult it can be to keep your head up—and how hard it can be to keep moving forward when your mind is working against you.
Once again, Prodigal Son is set in the near future in Denver, but it is a vague, fuzzy type of flash forward. I didn’t give anyone a flying car or space helmet. If it doesn’t come across as futuristic as you hoped, I apologize. It’s really hard to stay contemporary and be realistic when you just have NO IDEA what the world will look like at the point you’re writing about.
I do want to mention again: I will not respond to complaints about the 1st Generation characters. When I put that warning in the previous book, I think it was taken out of context quite a bit. I wasn’t saying not to leave a review or comment on your specific likes and dislikes of my writing choices to the rest of the world. Hell, I encourage that kind of lively conversation among readers. I was simply stating that, since I answer all of my own email and run all of my own social media platforms, don’t expect a response. I’m happy to reply across the board to my readers in all forms, even when they don’t have the nicest or most flattering things to say. I always want to acknowledge someone who took the time out of their day to reach out to me. But I’m not going to defend my creative choices or justify that I know my characters best to anyone. If you don’t like something I’ve done, please tell other readers about it, but I really can’t do anything about what readers love or hate after a book has been published. Once it’s out there, it’s out there. I hope that clarifies my intent. And if you’re still waiting for more of your faves from the original series, just give me some time. I have a few books in the 2nd Generation series planned, so you never know who may show up and surprise you.
That was all a big mouthful. I hope you’re loving these kids as much as you love their parents. I can’t believe it’s been nearly a decade since Rule made his way into the world. Time flies for sure. But it’s been fun, and there
hasn’t been a single story I regret telling along the way.
Thank you so much for taking this long and ever-winding journey with me. I can’t wait to see where we end up next.
Love & Ink
Jay
“THE WAY SHE loves you…” The small woman standing in front of me shook her head and glared at me with eyes that were not only two different colors, but also full of two different emotions. The blue eye was full of sorrow and glimmered with a soul-deep sadness. The darker eye was lit from within with rage and the kind of anger only a mother who was bound and determined to protect her child could feel. “It’s going to kill her. And it’s going to destroy you. I’m serious, Hyde. She’s going to continue to hurt herself if you don’t take yourself out of the equation. We both know she’s never going to let you go. It has to be you who cuts all ties. She’ll never hurt you on purpose; she’ll just keep hurting herself over and over again. If you don’t put some distance between the two of you, there is a good chance no one will be there to save her next time.”
I looked through the small window in the closed door of the hospital room. It was dark inside, but I could just make out the figure on the bed hooked up to a bunch of machines that were monitoring her vitals. Remy was lucky to be alive. I knew that. I also knew her mother had a point. If Remy’s younger brother hadn’t been injured during soccer practice and decided to go home early, he wouldn’t have found her before she stopped breathing. And I would be taking the flowers I was clutching like a lifeline to her funeral instead of to her hospital room. Her brother performed CPR until the paramedics showed up and rushed her to the emergency room, leaving an empty bottle of prescription sleeping pills on the floor next to a half-full bottle of whiskey, which had slipped from her grip when her heart almost stopped beating. Zowen saved her life, and just like Remy’s mother coldly insinuated, I seemed to be the one who repeatedly ruined it.
I let the flowers fall to my side, not only because my body suddenly felt numb, but because I realized the devastated woman in front of me was right.
It didn’t matter how many times I told Remy Archer that I saw her as a little sister. I swore to her that I considered her my closest friend, and I would never jeopardize the rock-solid relationship we’d had since we were kids by adding anything romantic or sexual to the mix. She insisted we were meant to be together. The girl had loved me with her entire being since the beginning, and there was no convincing her that we weren’t meant to be. In Remy’s mind, she saw our fate written in the stars, and I was just a stupid boy who was standing in the dark.
Sure, I loved her. She was honestly the most loveable person I’d ever encountered in my short life. But I loved her like she was part of my family. I’d lost count of the number of times I’d hurt her, rejected her, disappointed her, and not managed to live up to the heroic, nearly perfect image of me she had in her mind. I would never be as great as she believed me to be. So, I never even tried. I was the one holding Remy back. I was the one standing in her way. She was always going to wait for me, wasting her time and energy on something, on someone, who was never going to live up to her expectations and grandiose ideals.
I was just a normal guy. There was nothing overly special or impressive about me.
Remy was anything but normal. Everything about her was special. She was magnetic and charismatic. She was bubbly and bright. Wherever she went, chaos and excitement followed. People either loved her or hated her with equal passion. She was polarizing without trying to be. People were drawn to her.
Physically, I towered over Remy, but somehow it seemed I always ended up in her shadow. She lived to be the center of attention, and I could throw up at the thought of having all eyes on me for any length of time. It was easier to screw up and make mistakes when someone was watching your every move. Remy didn’t care about those kinds of things, but the idea of failure in front of an audience made my skin feel too tight and turned my stomach inside out.
Remy’s mom sighed heavily and reached out to pat me on the arm. Cora Archer was very petite, but her small stature didn’t stop her from coming across as larger than life. She was scarier than Remy and Zowen’s dad, who was nearly as big and burly as my own father. I had inherited the height gene, but I was definitely missing the bulk that the grown men in my life tended to have. I was only twenty, so there was still time to catch up and be considered a giant like my dad.
Cora squeezed my arm and gave me a serious look. “I’m not blaming what Remy did on you, Hyde. I’m asking you to help me save my daughter.” Her fingers dug into my arm in an almost painful way, and I watched as pure desperation filled her two-toned gaze. “If anyone is to blame for things getting this far with her, it’s me. We’re too much alike. I should’ve seen that the way she feels about you is unhealthy and dangerous. It was cute when you were young, and she tried to steal kisses and your toys so you would pay attention to her. It’s something else altogether now that you’re both older, and you’ve clearly told her you don’t share her feelings.” The blonde woman sighed heavily and blinked back tears. “The sleeping pills she took were mine. Her dad got hurt really bad when I was pregnant with her, and I still have nightmares and anxiety from what happened that day. I shouldn’t have been so careless with them, or with Remy’s mental health. I was the same way when I was young. I know all the signs better than anyone. I also lost my mind over a boy, and nearly lost myself as well. If my father hadn’t gotten me on the right path, I very well could’ve ended up just like my daughter. I should’ve seen that Remy was caught in the same kind of scary spiral. If I lost her…” Her voice trailed off and got husky. She shook her head slightly and squeezed my arm again. This time it was hard enough it actually hurt. Cora Archer would never knowingly hurt anyone, so I could tell just how close to the edge she was. I didn’t ask her to loosen her grip or remove her hand because no matter what she said, I knew I had a hand in Remy ending up in that hospital bed. “I’m not even going to think about what would’ve happened if Zowen hadn’t been there. I’m not going to worry about what will happen when she finds out that I asked you to leave. She’s going to hate me. If she finds out that I’m begging you to get out of her life before it’s too late, I don’t think she’ll ever be able to forgive me.” It went unspoken that if Remy figured out what her mother was asking me to do right now, it could very easily trigger another extreme reaction. There was no telling if Remy would be able to survive another attempt on her life.
She wouldn’t forgive either of us if I left without a goodbye. She would be furious I left and angry her mother didn’t try to stop me.
Remy was stubborn and hated when anyone told her how to live her life or tell her what was best for her. When she had her mind set to something, there was very little that could change it. She was only eighteen, but sometimes acted like she was fully grown and had lived a lifetime’s worth of experiences. She was sure she was right, even when she was doing something she knew was very wrong.
I lifted the flowers and handed them to Cora Archer. I dragged my other hand down my face and gave myself a mental shake. It wasn’t like I hadn’t been wrestling with myself over the next steps in my life anyway. In fact, the reason Remy had resorted to such drastic measures was because I told her I was thinking about enlisting in the military. It was the one place she knew she couldn’t follow me, so she immediately hated the idea. It was the one option that was bound to separate us. I wasn’t considering it to get away from her, exactly. I was just trying to escape all the expectations coming at me constantly from everyone who loved me the most. I felt like I couldn’t breathe, and I was bound to let someone down whatever route I decided to take.
My mom wanted me to go to college and focus on finding a suitable career. My dad wanted me to learn his contracting business from the ground up. And Remy wanted me to be her everything. She never made that a secret, but I couldn’t do that.
I knew I wasn’t cut out for college life or summers under the sun doing manual labor. I’d yet to find th
at elusive thing that sparked excitement and joy within me. It seemed like everyone around me had their life’s calling all figured out, and I was just clueless. I wouldn’t have felt like such a failure if I wasn’t surrounded by people who actually figured out how to follow their dreams. Everyone with the last name Archer was included in that group. It was grating to have kids several years younger than me already on the path to happiness and fulfillment. And now, my indecision and lack of drive had hurt someone else deeply. Because I didn’t know who I was or who I wanted to be, I’d driven Remy to the brink of how much rejection she could handle. I thought her resilience and determination was endless. That there was no end to her devotion to me.
I was wrong.
I knew she was upset after we talked and didn’t want to hear I might be leaving her behind for a significant amount of time. I knew when I told her we needed space, that both of us needed time to grow up and figure our lives out, she’d been hurt. In her mind, everything we needed to know, we were supposed to learn together. However, I should’ve known that when I told her I wanted the chance to meet someone else, it was a step too far in making my point. I didn’t really want a girlfriend or to meet someone else, but I knew telling Remy I did would be the one thing to finally get her to back off a bit. As persistent as she was, she would never want me to be unhappy, and telling her she was in the way of me finding someone special was the final nail in the coffin of our years-long relationship.
She was so certain I’d come to love her the way she loved me, and it shattered her belief in herself, and in me, when I told her that any love I had to give, I wanted to share with someone else. There had been other girls who drifted in and out of my life over the years, but none of them were ever able to hold a candle to Remy. She outshone them all, and eventually, they all got tired of being left in the dark because Remy came first.
Prodigal Son: A Sexy Single Dad Romance: Book 2 in the Marked Men 2nd Generation Series (The Forever Marked Series) Page 1