We rocked together, violent and vicious, chasing the madness that had infected us both. He rocked into me, pressing my clit with each thrust, hurtling me toward the cliff where all good orgasms originate.
It siphoned through my toes, legs, hands, and heart.
I came alive with it.
I moaned with it.
I threw my head back and let him shove me headfirst into a milking, clenching climax, all while he drove again and again, taking me, fucking me, loving me.
His snarl when he came made my heart hitch with fear. He sounded wild and untameable and totally like a man used to being god with no consequences.
It turned me on.
It made me feel powerful.
So damn powerful to be held by a man so ruthless.
He jerked and shuddered, spurting inside me until his entire body jolted, and he tumbled to his side. Breathing hard, he manhandled me until he spooned me from behind.
His heart hammered against my back, keeping in-tune with mine.
Kissing my hair, he whispered, “I’m sorry. Those sorts of things I should keep hidden. It makes me sound like a monster.”
I stroked his forearm as it wrapped tight around my breasts, gluing me to him. “You haven’t scared me off. Even though I should probably run for my life.”
He nuzzled into me, inhaling my scent and groaning softly. “I’m afraid you wouldn’t get far, Eleanor. The time for running is well and truly over.”
I smiled as quietness descended, helping our breathing regulate. “If I’m free, it means you have to let me go if I ask.”
He shuddered, kissing my nape. “Will you ask? Are you going to break me all over again?”
Skittles landed on the pillow beside me. She puffed up and nudged her tiny beak against my nose. With a quiet chirp, she turned in a circle and plopped down as if the pillow was her chosen nest. Her eyes promptly closed, granting serenity to the night, to me.
I bent my head and kissed Sully’s forearm. “If I ask you to free me, it’s because something has gone terribly, terribly wrong with us. But I can never see me asking, Sully Sinclair, because you…you are perfect for me. And I’m not afraid to be loved by you…despite your black and white boundaries.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”
“Don’t say you trust me if you don’t.”
He jerked but slowly relaxed and snuggled close. “You’ve earned my trust. You’ve stolen my heart. I guess that will have to be enough for now.”
I yawned, slipping beneath the physical and mental exhaustion of the day. “I love you. If that makes me crazy, reckless, stupid, and naïve…so be it. I love you, Sully Sinclair and—”
His hand jerked my chin to the side, his lips planting over mine, kissing me from behind.
He kissed me with every depth of feeling glowing between us. He made tears squeeze from my eyes. He made my body liquefy in his arms.
And when the kiss switched from consuming to calming, and our lips barely grazed each other as we slipped from consciousness to dreamland, I’d never been so contented.
I fell asleep with Sully wrapped around me.
Our hearts thumping as one.
Our confessions and commitments shining like stars above us.
Chapter Twenty-Six
“I LOVE YOU, JINX.” I smiled, carefree and happy.
A decade had slipped from my shoulders, removing sins and secrets, eradicating the heavy blackness from my life.
The coffee-haired goddess with her silver eyes didn’t turn around at my declaration.
My heart skipped a beat as I scowled and moved to stand in front of her. “Did you not hear me?”
She blinked, staring at me with no recognition whatsoever. “I’m sorry…what did you say?”
“I said, I love you.”
She stepped backward, her hand going to her chest. “But…I don’t even know you.”
My temper sparked with dry tinder. “What the hell are you talking about? Of course, you fucking know me.”
Her beautiful face blanched. “I’ve never seen you before.”
Fuck, the pain.
I’d never felt such pain.
“Whatever you’re doing, Eleanor, stop it. Right now.”
True fear smoked in her grey gaze. “Please…you’re scaring me. I honestly don’t know who you are.”
“You’re mine! That’s who you are.” I went to snatch her. To shake some sense into her. But a mirrored wall bounced my reflection with warning.
A man I’d never seen before stared back. He matched my movements, mimicked my motions. Every breath I took, he did. Every twitch, he copied. Every blink, he parroted.
What the—
My heart bucked as I scratched at my jaw, staring at blond stubble and shaved head instead of my usual dark features.
Eleanor continued to back away, fog curled around her feet, steadily obscuring her.
“No!” I rushed toward her. “Wait. It’s Sully. You know me. You love me. Wait!”
She wrung her hands, desperate to get away from me. “I’m sorry. You’re confused. You need help. I’m not who you think I am.”
“You are. You’re mine, goddammit. I’m in love with you. With all my fucking soul.”
The fog continued to hug her, deleting her wisp by wisp.
Euphoria.
That’s why she didn’t recognise me.
I was in Euphoria, hiding within a different character.
Rushing to the mirror, I yanked at the blond stubble. I scratched at the bald head. I stuck my fingers in my eyes to remove the sensors blocking me from the truth.
Pinching the slippery suckers, I yanked them from my gaze and threw them to the floor. With a huge exhale, I looked at the mirror again, lightheaded with relief that I’d figured it out. All I had to do was remove Eleanor’s sensors too, so she could see me, recognise me, come home with me.
Yet…as I raised my head and stared into my gaze…green stared back, not blue. Red hair loose around my shoulders, burly stance—a highlander from the Scottish moors.
No!
I glanced over my shoulder, searching for Eleanor, ready to get on my fucking knees for help.
But the fog had stolen her from me.
I was all alone, shedding the skins of imposters, unable to find who I truly was behind so many fucking masks.
I punched the mirror.
It smashed but repaired itself; the splinters of glass reforming and changing my reflection from red hair to dreadlocks.
A man with an ear-piercing and rings on his fingers.
I howled and scratched at my face.
Another mask fell.
A new man stared back. This one bristling with a black Mohawk and heavily shadowed eyes.
“Stop!”
It didn’t stop.
The shedding increased in speed.
Over and over, masks continued to fall and appear, obscuring me from myself.
A never-ending carousel of strangers.
Greek, Chinese, African, Swedish. Every nationality. Every shape and size.
Until finally, I slammed to my knees in terror and turmoil, unable to stare into another pair of unknown eyes, so fucking lost, crippling under the defeat of losing Eleanor.
My breath caught.
The final disguise fell away, leaving a kid standing in the rubble.
A kid I did recognise.
A kid with bruises and bumps of badly healed broken bones. A kid with a one-eyed dog at his side, covered in the wounds that’d killed him.
Pika appeared, squawking in panic, unable to figure out what’d happened to me. He flew around the boy, around and around, until he gave up and catapulted away.
The kid stared at the broken man in the mirror and said, “You gave that bird his freedom, and he stayed. You gave the girl her freedom, and she didn’t. She left because how can she trust a man who doesn’t recognise himself? How can she love a man who doesn’t deserve her trust? How can any goodness come from su
ch lies?”
I wanted to kill the boy, to stop his awful message, but he stepped out of the mirror…he became me.
His voice in my skull.
His past hopes and dreams crushing me with disappointment. “It’s better she’s gone. She’s safer this way. Don’t you agree?”
A single tear rolled down my cheek as Pongo—the dog I’d tried to rescue only to sign his death warrant—disintegrated into dust. The voice of my adolescent self echoed through my bleeding chest. “Everything you love dies, Sinclair. Everything you treasure is gone. That’s your true curse. The one you can never run from.”
The bed shook.
The villa creaked.
The air boomed with explosive thunder.
My eyes tore open. My body leapt upright, ready for battle, primed and on high alert.
Earthquake? Tsunami?
Eleanor.
I dropped my fists, no longer ready to fight an imaginary demon but needing to touch the girl I loved. I held out my palm as she scrambled across the mattress toward me. “Sully. What the hell was that noise?”
“I don’t know.” Keeping her close, so fucking thankful she was still with me and the nightmare was over, I dragged her to the deck and outside.
Dawn had already begun, shoving back the stars, making way for sunshine and another tropical day. No rain. No lightning. The boom hadn’t been thunder from the many angry storms we endured.
The waterfall continued to cascade. The blue pool serene with its glittering ripples.
So what the fuck woke us?
Almost as if the universe heard my question and decided to give me a precise and definite answer, another crack sounded, followed by the terrifying reverberation of war.
Boom.
Fucking boom.
A plume of smoke rose in the distance, kilometres away but black as cloying death.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck!
Letting Eleanor go, I bolted back into the villa and snatched my phone from the sideboard. Cal answered before the line properly rang. “I heard. Already got pilots yanking on their pants. I’ll meet you at the helicopter.”
My heart smashed against my ribs. “He’s going to fucking pay for this.”
“I have no doubt.” Cal crashed into something, probably hauling his own clothes on.
I looked down at my naked body. A body that’d been inside Eleanor. A body containing a heart that’d believed it was worthy of some goddamn happiness after so long.
Turned out, fate wasn’t done tormenting me yet. Or torturing those I loved.
“I’ll see you at the helipad in seven minutes,” I hissed.
One minute to dress.
Six minutes to bolt down the sandy path from Nirvana.
It was a fucking eternity.
If Drake had hurt anything…Christ.
He’ll pay.
I’ll make him pay with every droplet of his toxic blood.
No mercy this time.
No fucking leniency.
He’s dead.
Throwing my phone on the bed, I stormed into my wardrobe and threw on whatever I reached first. Slacks and a white t-shirt. I grabbed boots instead of expensive loafers.
Eleanor intercepted me as I came back out. She’d pulled the sheet from my bed and wrapped it around her gorgeous body. Her eyes were as wide as I’d ever seen them. Behind her, black smoke thickened up the sky.
Shit!
“Sully. What’s going on?”
Grabbing her by the shoulders, I marched her to the mattress and shoved her down. “Stay here. Don’t go anywhere.” Stuffing my phone into my pocket, I swiped a shaky hand through my hair.
I split down the middle.
I didn’t want to leave her.
But I cursed every moment she held me back.
She popped up from the bed, amplifying my panic, bleeding into rage. “Sit down, Eleanor!”
Her cheeks pinked with matching temper. “What the hell is going on? Tell me. Let me help—”
“You can’t help.” Backing away to the door, I imprinted her to memory. The nasty pain from my dream had ghosted into reality. This felt like a goodbye, not just a short parting.
This felt final.
She held up her hand, stepping toward me.
I bared my teeth. “Do not leave my villa. I have to deal with this.”
“Deal with what?”
“My motherfucking brother,” I snarled. “He’s attacked Serigala.”
Her terrified inhale was the last sound I heard as I turned and charged from my villa.
I turned my back on my future to protect my past.
I chose animal over human.
Meek over immortal.
Creature over soul-mate.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
I WASN’T FAST ENOUGH.
The second Sully vanished; I threw on the borrowed shirt and bolted after him. I ran as fast as I could. My lungs burst. My legs burned. I kept pushing, trying the impossible to catch up with him.
But…I was too late.
Gasping for air, I stood on the shoreline, squinting into the newly risen sun, dying inside as the helicopter holding Sully and Cal flew into the plume of black smoke in the distance.
From here, it looked like a volcano had gone off, spewing fire and hatred into the atmosphere, tainting the air with carcinogens and ash. Only…Sully had said his brother had attacked Serigala.
He had a brother?
And if he did, why on earth would he attack a sanctuary for disabled and diseased animals?
What sort of psychopath would do such a thing?
Swallowing hard, doing my best to get my breathing under control, I wrapped my arms around myself, drenched with a sudden chill.
How could a few short hours separate the best time of my life to the most uncertain?
Sully had been wild.
Each word that’d fallen from his mouth had sounded like a snarling pack of wolves.
Yesterday, I’d found him so unbelievably handsome. The more we revealed about ourselves, the more I found him attractive. Each time his shields came down, I spied an equally beautiful soul hidden within its host.
His laughter…wow.
It had the power to stop my heart. To stop my thoughts. To completely wrap me up in an embarrassing amount of devotion.
There had been no laughter this morning.
I’d hardly recognised him. His eyes had been feral. His temper on the shortest leash.
Not directed at me, but at his family.
A brother who had done something monstrous.
I sighed as the helicopter vanished into the smoky horizon.
I hated the distance…not just physical but emotional. Sully had withdrawn from me. The link between his heart and mine had been severed.
You’re reading into things. You were both literally woken up by a bomb. Of course, he would be short and rush to attend the wreckage.
Common-sense was a kind matron, speaking wisdom I really ought to accept, so why was there a noxious little sparrow on my shoulder, whispering of endings and goodbyes and that love wasn’t eternal, after all?
Skittles descended, scattering that little sparrow intent on whispering unpleasant repellent things. She pecked my cheek gently, worry trembling her feathered body. Pika squeaked as he landed on my other shoulder, his black eyes locked on the sky.
“He’ll be back, guys. I promise.” My voice didn’t sound nearly as confident as it should.
Get a grip, Ellie.
What’s gotten into you?
Nothing had changed between us.
Yes, circumstances had ripped us apart this morning, but…that was just life. Work and errands and other commitments would always intrude on a new romance.
I sighed, slouching into myself.
Then why can’t I shake this horrible premonition that yesterday is all I’m going to have with him?
“Hey.” A feminine arm slinked around my waist, squeezing me gently. “Y
ou okay?”
I turned my head, smiling sadly at Jealousy. She wore a pink polka dot singlet and pyjama shorts, her blonde hair still messy from sleep.
Seemed the noise had woken everyone early this morning.
“Yeah, I’m okay. You?”
She eyed up Skittles and Pika commandeering my shoulders before turning her attention to the ominous blackness on the horizon. The faint smell of burning overshadowed the sea breeze.
God.
Please don’t let those animals be hurt.
Jealousy huffed under her breath, looking as morose as I felt. “For once, you know more than me about this current situation. Fill me in?”
I shrugged. “Not much to tell. Sully’s brother attacked Serigala.”
“Ah, yes, Drake. He’s a fucking asshole.”
“You know him?”
She shook her head. “Heard of him.” Falling quiet for a moment, she asked quietly, “And what’s on Serigala? Is that the island where he sends all that animal feed too? Does he have an army of pets that he keeps hidden?”
“It’s a rehab facility for lab animals and other abused cases.”
“Oh.” She gnawed on her bottom lip. “And the chances of it being blown to bits?”
My heart fisted. “Hopefully zero.”
“But if it is?” She flinched. “How many just died?”
Tears glossed my gaze as the sea lapped around our ankles and two parrots cooed sadly in my ears. “Hundreds. Thousands. Enough that it will destroy Sully.”
Jealousy dropped her arm from around my waist. “Oh.”
I nodded, unable to fight the liquid tracking down my cheeks.
Yes. Oh.
Whatever Sully was about to face—whatever war he was about to reap…he wouldn’t be the same man when he returned.
Whatever progress I’d made.
Whatever connection we’d built.
It might have been murdered along with so many other lives lost today.
That was why I was so afraid.
That was why I couldn’t stop the trickle of ice.
If Serigala had been attacked…it didn’t matter what I felt for Sully or what he felt for me…his loyalties were fierce to those who couldn’t speak. To the vulnerable creatures with four legs, wings, and tails.
He would fight for them.
He would extract vengeance for them.
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