“The war may be almost over, but we’re leaving,” I said, sitting down beside David.
He shook his head. “I’m assigned car DK 413. It’s over for me. I know where I’m going and what will happen to me there. It’s done!”
He slammed his fist on his cot. I grabbed him by the shoulders. “You’re not going to be on DK 413.”
David was scared and impatient. “Max, I’m not exempted. Do you understand? I’m a Jew, and we’re all going to be murdered!”
“I know, I know. Rahm’s a ruthless bastard. We’re both going to be called up next. That’s why we’re getting the hell out of here. We’re going to Prague.”
“What are you talking about, Max?”
“We have two options. We can go to Auschwitz and die, or we can try to escape. You can be my first mate.”
I grinned and saw a glint in David’s eye.
“In a boat?” he asked.
I nodded.
“On a raft. Hundreds of people are next. I don’t think we’ll be missed at the station. It’s chaos down there. You’ll be sailing on the SS Max by the time they even notice we’re gone. I have charts and provisions.”
“You have this all planned out?”
“The operative word, David, is out! We have an appointment to keep. I must do this, I promised Poppy.”
“I had no idea what you were up to …”
“I didn’t know if I could pull it off—we may not yet—and I wasn’t sure if you would have supported my plan, because it’s crazy.” I laughed, and knew I sounded a little crazy. “I think I may actually be nuts. Norbert wouldn’t disagree. David, I’m thinking of us. We might not succeed, but this is your only chance of getting to Palestine and reuniting with your folks. What could be better?”
David couldn’t believe my plan.
“Did you know that Rahm is shutting down Vedem? Doesn’t that tell you something?”
“It tells me a lot.”
David stood up and began to pace the room. “What are we going to do for money?”
“I have a stash that Poppy gave me. I’ve been saving it. I’ll come for you tomorrow in the afternoon; Freidle thinks we’re working on the last edition. And don’t bring more than ten suitcases. I know you like to travel light.”
David stopped in front of me. “Max, you’re actually going to do it! Why are you taking me?”
Before I replied, I thought that, like Huck, I was planning to repay David for his troubles and send him home a hero, giving him a reception with a marching band.
“To always be your friend,” I said. “We need each other.”
“What do you mean?”
“Hans told me that my mother was Jewish.”
“Welcome to the tribe.”
“I thought you’d be surprised.”
“I’ve always liked you for who you are.”
“I know that, David.”
“What about Sophie?” David asked, throwing clothing into a small suitcase.
“She’s coming too.”
“You’ve told her?”
“Not yet. I’m going to tell her now and convince her to come.”
“Do you think she will?”
“Yes, I think so. She has to.”
“How do you know that?”
“I guess because we love each other. I know we belong together.”
A LAST GOODBYE
I had to get word to Sophie so I sent a note with Sarah Markova. Please tell her it’s important!
“Did you know Edith had a relapse?” Sarah asked, shaking her head. “I think she’s been moved to a different ward.”
“Damn, why am I the last to know?” I had been so preoccupied with my escape plan that I’d failed Sophie. Clasping Sarah’s hands, I urged, “Please get word to her. I must see her.”
Then to Hans. I was desperate, ready to do anything to get him out of Terezín.
“We’ll make room for you on the raft. You’ve got to come with me.”
Regardless of every argument I could muster, I couldn’t persuade him to leave—he had been set in his ways for too long. He was too committed to the children. He could never leave them. He was resigned to be who he wanted to be. Even when I told Hans how much he counted, I couldn’t shake him out of his stubbornness. And I was sure and told myself over and over that the Germans would never kill children, that no one would do that, and that Hans would take care of them. That was his assignment. I could only say goodbye.
“The war will be over,” Hans said. “There will be a new beginning. Things will get better …”
“Until we’re together again.”
There didn’t seem to be much more to say.
Walking over to me, Hans grabbed me in a long embrace. “I love you, Max. I loved Poppy too.”
He clutched me even tighter. “You’ve always meant everything to me.”
Stepping back, he said, “We’ll make it, I know we will. The Great Viktor Mueller is depending on it.”
I left and didn’t look back. It was too painful. I wondered when I would see him again.
Sarah got word to Sophie and she came to Ava’s house that night. I pulled myself together.
When she appeared at the door to my room, I began speaking faster than I could think. “Sophie, this is the most important decision of our lives.”
“All right, Max. Tell me.”
She sat on my bed, her hands in her lap.
“We’re leaving.” I went to the window, collecting my thoughts. I could hear the river running not far away.
“I want you to come with me. I built a raft and we’re sailing down the river to Prague. David is coming too.”
“Max, you’re crazy. But I’m not surprised.”
“So I’ve been told. But I want to be sure you’re safe and, with me, I think you will be.”
Sophie took my hand. “You’re very brave, Max.”
My heart beat quickly. “I’m not so brave. But, come with me, Sophie, please.”
“I want to, Max, more than anything. But Mama is ill. She needs me. I can’t leave her.”
“I know. Sarah told me. And I feel terrible.”
“I don’t want to worry you. The medicine Poppy brought is helping. It’s a new drug. What worries me is that she won’t take it. She says there are other patients who need it.”
“But it’s got to be in short supply. Is there any left?”
Tears welled in her eyes. “I can’t leave her, Max, I just can’t.”
“Oh, God … Sophie.”
I didn’t know what to say.
“Maybe she can come too, and we’ll look after her, keep her warm.”
“She’s in quarantine, Max. I could never … we thought it was just a bad cold at first, but it got worse. Typhoid.”
“Oh, God.”
I summoned my final plea. “You’ve got to come with me, Sophie. I think Edith would want you to.”
My voice was raised, panic creeping in.
“Max!” Sophie cried, grabbing my shoulders and shaking me. “Max! I can’t! Listen to me. Don’t make me choose. Don’t hurt me like that.”
“Okay,” I said, throwing my shoulders back. “Then, I’m staying here. I’m not going to leave you.”
Softening, she took me in her arms. “Max, you must go. Do it for me. For Poppy.”
“You’ve always been my … I love you.”
“I know. You always have,” she said, brushing a strand of hair from my brow.
“There are rumors the war is almost over. It can’t be long now.”
Sophie brightened slightly. “I think so too. We’ll hold on. And someone has to take care of Hans.”
I held her, kissed her.
“I’ll come back for you, Sophie.”
“I’ll be waiting.�
� She gave a shaky smile. “I can just picture you and David, rafting down the Mississippi.”
“Did you know?”
“Yes, I knew.”
“There’s a secret I want to tell you before you hear it from anyone else.”
“Tell me.”
I took a deep breath. “I’m Jewish. Hans told me my mother was Jewish.”
Sophie smiled again. “I always knew there was something about you that I liked.”
“I haven’t had time to even think about what that means or how I feel about it, but I know that I like it. I feel I belong. At last.”
“You’ve always belonged, Max,” said Sophie. I looked at her face, so thin, yet still so beautiful to me.
“I have a few words to say, and I don’t have to think about them because they’re what I feel and have always known.” I never had the ability to compose a poem on the spot, but now I was going to do it.
Her eyes were shining. “Well, go ahead.”
I cleared my throat.
“I hurt because I love,
I say goodbye so I can say hello.
I cry so I can smile
I go out so I can come in.”
Sophie led me out into the hall, where she had found a Victrola left over from the Red Cross inspection. Taking a record, she turned the handle and placed the needle on a groove. It was one of her favorite songs, “The Way You Look Tonight.”
She took my arms and wrapped them around her shoulders.
“But, Sophie, you know I can’t.”
“But, Max, you can. I’ve always wanted to dance with you.”
As the music played, I was awkward at first, but with Sophie’s encouragement, I moved gracefully with the song and in this Fred and Ginger moment it was Max and Sophie. I would never forget that lyric. Maybe just sentimental slosh, but it touched me. I guess like Poppy, I’d always been hopelessly romantic.
Someday, when I’m awfully low
When the world is cold
I will feel a glow just thinking of you.
She tearfully snuggled into bed with me and laid her head on my chest. I stroked her hair and she kissed me. I whispered in her ear: “I guess being happy is not necessarily having what you want, but always truly knowing what you have.”
She smiled weakly. “Why, you are a poet, Max. I knew that all along too. You know, I was always afraid of loving you so much. This isn’t the end, Max. I can’t—I can’t even think—”
“I will come back for you.”
Sophie gave me a small envelope, wrapped in blue paper. “I’ve been carrying this close to my heart for weeks, and I want you to take it with you. You can’t open it now, only when you are safe, Max. Promise me.”
I drew her closer, never wanting to let her go, kissing her cheeks, wet with tears. We held each other for hours, lost in our own thoughts. I drifted asleep with her in my arms, but when I woke in the darkness she was gone.
I was leaving Sophie and Hans. Maybe they were right to stay. If Poppy had been ill, still a prisoner, I couldn’t think of leaving either. They would be all right. They had to be, I had to believe it.
In the distance, near a forest that loomed close by, a train whistle blew, wailing up through the valley toward the station, then the chugging became quiet, with only the intermittent sounds of puffing steam.
My wristwatch ticked 2:00 a.m. Getting up and dressing quietly, I went down the stairs, into the night air, passing through darkness, and made a final check. I had to be sure everything was in place and ready. Norbert had found an old navigation chart in the library, and he didn’t think that the river’s path had changed much in the last twenty years. Pavel and I had stashed my hurdy-gurdy on the raft, but still there remained one detail to take care of—for Poppy. I stole over to the Little Fortress, where a stack of drums were stored in a field. Then, over to Rahm’s bathhouse. I took every precaution not to be seen, just like on my scouting trips with David. I moved easily and silently, my legs cooperating like a military ranger undercover. The operation took less than two hours and wasn’t as difficult as I’d imagined.
Returning to my room, Twain was still on my bed with favorite passages marked in the margins:
I was pretty tired, and the first thing I knowed I was asleep. When I woke up I didn’t know where I was for a minute. I set up and looked around, a little scared. Then I remembered. The river looked miles and miles across. The moon was so bright … Everything was dead quiet … The stars were shining, and the leaves rustled in the woods ever so mournful; and I heard an owl, away off, who-whooing … and a whippowill …
Early in the morning I popped in to see Fritz. I wanted to say goodbye but no one was around. After the war was over, I thought I would send a postcard to him every day just to keep his mailbox full. After all, what is a post office for?
Right after lunch, prompt and correct, Frau Schmidt walked me to Hanover Barracks, where David was waiting with lanky hair and a shuffling gait. Passing a few guards, we were a familiar sight, ever since Rahm had demanded Frau Schmidt accompany me to visit my “little Jewish friend.”
She gave her usual greetings, barking at the guards, “Straighten up, wake up, Valter. Attention, Bernhard!” They didn’t seem to mind having a few orders thrown at them in a way no one else dared every time she passed. Was she their conscience? Or, strutting plump and proud, did she simply remind them of their mothers?
When Frau Schmidt paraded past the guards, she leaned over and whispered to me, “I know about your plan, and the raft.” She glanced around the empty square.
“How?”
“I know your every move. Be careful.”
“And Freidle?”
“Not so much. And he wouldn’t want to know. For all his faults, he’s fond of you,” she said, marching straight ahead.
“I thought it was a secret. How did you find out?”
“Max, quit asking questions. Do as you’re told.”
“I’m going to miss you,” I said, taking her hand.
She almost smiled, shooing the thought away. “Get serious, Max.”
Then she paused and whispered, “I’ll miss you too.”
“I’ll see the lists as soon as they come over from the SS,” she said in a raspy tone, speaking out of the corner of her mouth.
“You must make sure Sophie and Hans are not numbered.”
She nodded when she heard the desperation in my voice. “I’m good at making up rooms and rearranging books. Part of what I do. Of course, I’ll be arrested if Rahm finds out. But it couldn’t happen to a nicer person.”
I laughed. “Frau Schmidt, I never—”
“Knew that I had a sense of humor? Well, just don’t tell anyone. Here’s the address of Pension Burger in Prague, don’t lose it. Pierre worked for me in Berlin before he opened his own place, in better days. He knows you’re coming, and he’ll be expecting you boys, so don’t let me down. I’m never pleased when someone cancels a reservation without twenty-four hours’ notice. He’ll be waiting for you at Judith Landing just before the tower at Charles Bridge in two days’ time, Tuesday at four o’clock. He’ll wait as long as he can. I’ll give you some money.”
“I have some that Poppy gave me. Having a contact in Prague will make all the difference.”
“Your father knew Pierre as well. You’ll be safe there.”
We kept walking, and Frau Schmidt kept barking. “Straighten up, Leopold, pay attention! You’re on duty.”
The guards tried to hide their smiles. After we passed, she dropped her voice back to a whisper: “Max, when you and David are no longer around, Rahm will think you have both been transported.”
“Thanks for helping me.”
“That’s what I’m here for,” she said, never losing her disapproving demeanor. “And I owe a lot to your father. He was a hero to
the cause.”
The cause?
“And you’ll watch over Sophie?” I asked. “Promise me that.”
“You can be sure.”
We had arrived at David’s barracks and he joined us outside. He was surprised by Frau Schmidt, and raised his brow at me. I gave an innocent shrug.
“Okay, boys, we’re twenty minutes from the river. Follow me.”
David was quiet, looking neither to the left nor right. I kept my head down and tried to calm my racing heart. Walking through the gate, Frau Schmidt carried on straight ahead, not blinking an eye.
“I’ve been watching you and Norbert for days,” she said. “You always amaze me. Let me just say, without getting too sweet, that I have liked knowing you.”
Her words filled me up inside. “Frau Schmidt, I feel the same, I always have. I think I have a crush on you.”
“Crush? Crush? What kind of crush?”
She blushed and even David was tickled.
“You’re a formidable woman, Frau Schmidt!”
“I’d come with you, but I’m afraid this formidable woman would sink your bloody boat,” she said, keeping her composure. “Now, Max, there are reports that the Russians are near. I’ll let you and David know what happens through Pierre. It’ll satisfy your reporting needs.”
“Please drop in on Hans when you can, Frau Schmidt, he means a lot to me.”
“I know. He means a lot to us all.”
“It’s very nice of you to see us off.”
“I’ll wish you bon voyage.”
Passing the utility door of Rahm’s bathhouse, “Excuse me,” I said. “I have to go to the bathroom. I’ll meet you at the raft in a few minutes.”
I had my supplies ready, hidden the night before, having scouted out the location of the large propane gas tanks used for heating. I didn’t have enough explosive materials to blow up Himmler House, but there was an ample supply of kerosene for what I needed to do. By the time I’d finished, Major Karl Rahm was going to have the bath of a lifetime. As soon as Rahm turned on the sauna, the heater would ignite a slow-burning fuse, giving him just enough time to get into the tub before he was blown to high heaven.
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