by Diana Palmer
She sat down hard on the edge of the bathtub and wished she could go back to Christmas Eve and tell the truth. It was weeks too late now. Besides that, there was no privacy with the film company around, even if it was just for a few days, to reshoot one scene that someone had accidentally destroyed.
Maude found out, of course. It was impossible to hide anything from her. When Crissy lost her breakfast the following week and had to lie down, Maude confessed that she knew. She didn’t confess that she’d confided her fears to Cash.
She glared at Crissy with her arms crossed. “He’s down at the barn with the film crew,” she said. “You march right down there and tell him, or I will.”
“You will not!” Crissy said furiously, wiping her face with a wet cloth. “I have decisions to make.”
“So does he,” came the blunt reply. “It’s his baby as well. He’ll want it.”
Crissy wasn’t sure what Judd would want. He’d avoided her since the trip to Japan. In fact, he only came around now when the acting company was here. When he did, he was around Tippy coming and going. He still drove her to and from the hotel. He made sure that Crissy knew it, which hurt even more. It never occurred to her that Cash was hanging around, too, and Judd might be jealous.
“He spends most of his time with Tippy,” she said heavily. “Besides, he’ll file for divorce any day. It’s not fair to rob him of the little chance of happiness he has.”
“Little is right,” Maude scoffed. “I don’t have anything against Tippy, she’s been kind to both of us. But she’ll ruin his life. He could never fit in her world. Any more than you could fit in Cash’s,” she added pointedly.
“That’s Judd’s decision, not mine.”
Maude sighed. “I can’t argue with you, can I?”
“It doesn’t do much good.” Crissy had to agree. She smiled gently. “But I suppose you’re right. It isn’t something I can hide from him.”
“You got that right.” She glanced out the window. “He’s standing outside the barn with Gary and Tippy. You can catch him before he leaves.”
“I’d have better luck catching a cold,” Crissy muttered. “Okay, okay, I’m going!” She got off the bed and followed Maude down the hall.
Maude opened the back door for her with a wicked twinkle in her eyes.
“Don’t get your hopes up too high,” Crissy said as she passed onto the back stoop. “Judd told me that he doesn’t ever see himself as a family man.”
“You wait until he holds that baby and tell me that again.”
Crissy hoped she was right. But she had a bad feeling about the whole situation, and it got worse the closer she went to the barn. What if he thought she was lying? Worse, what if he thought it was Grier’s child? He’d seen her birth control pills at Christmas, he’d even remarked that he wouldn’t have touched her if he hadn’t known about them. But he still didn’t know that they were old and unused.
Nevertheless, she wasn’t going to be able to hide a pregnancy in Jacobsville, Texas, where everybody knew her and Judd. She might as well get it over with. After all, there wasn’t much he could do...
Her mind stopped dead at the sight that met her eyes when she rounded the corner. Gary, the assistant director, was back-talking to his camera-and soundmen. He glared toward the barn and turned away in disgust. Crissy wondered why until she could see inside. The barn was deserted except for two people. Judd was leaning against one of the high stalls, and Tippy was leaning against him, her beautiful body almost part of his in the posture as they kissed with something akin to desperation.
Crissy felt sick to her stomach. There was no way she could march in there and tell Judd he couldn’t divorce her because she was pregnant—not when it was patently obvious now that he was physically involved with Tippy. It was impossible to shrug off a kiss like that one. He’d told her he didn’t want Tippy!
She turned and went back the way she’d come without making a sound. Tears almost blinded her as she walked numbly to her old truck and got in behind the wheel. She pulled out the spare key she kept under the mat and started the engine. She drove away with no thought for her license or her insurance card, or even her purse.
Slowly, feeling returned. The pain was overwhelming. She saw that hungry kiss over and over again. It wasn’t Tippy kissing him, either. It was mutual. Apparently, he was so certain of the divorce that he was already making plans with the supermodel. It was difficult to see Tippy trying to live on a Texas Ranger’s salary, even with the dividends the ranch paid Judd as well as Crissy. The woman was beautiful and much in demand. She traveled the world to appear in fashion shows with the most famous designers. She must really love Judd if she was willing to give up all that money and fame. It shouldn’t have been surprising. Judd was a handsome, sexy, very masculine man. Tippy wouldn’t be the first woman who’d found him irresistible.
There wasn’t much traffic on the roads. It was too late for lunch and too early for the school buses to run. School. Her hands tightened on the steering wheel. She would have a child in school in just a few years. Judd would have to know. There wasn’t any way she could keep it secret from him. The baby he didn’t want would ruin his life, his hopes for the future. He would hate it, and Crissy.
She turned off the main road toward the high banks of the river on a narrow dirt road. Her mind was whirling. She couldn’t decide what to do. She could go away. But he’d find out, someday. It wasn’t as if she could go to a clinic; she couldn’t live with that, no matter what the cost. Blindly, she pressed down hard on the accelerator. She could see Judd kissing Tippy, she could feel the agony the sight had caused, like a fresh wound. Judd loved Tippy. He loved Tippy...!
She moaned out loud. She couldn’t tell him. She couldn’t! It was all her fault. She hadn’t been careful. She hadn’t taken precautions. The responsibility was hers. She should have to pay the consequences, not Judd.
She clenched her teeth and closed her eyes as she saw that kiss again. She wasn’t paying attention to the road. There was a narrow little bridge over the river—it didn’t even have guardrails. The river wasn’t so deep, but the bank was easily ten feet above it. When she opened her eyes, she was out of the ruts and headed straight for the bank...!
She gasped and jerked the wheel. Her foot hit the brake, hard, within inches of certain death. The truck slid to a stop with its front tires barely a foot from the edge of the embankment.
She leaned her head onto the steering wheel, shaking with relief. She felt hot tears wash over her hands at the close call she’d had. So much for driving when you were upset, which Judd had always told her not to do. If she hadn’t opened her eyes at that exact instant, she’d have gone right into the river. She might have been killed, to say nothing of her baby. Her hand went protectively to her slightly rounded stomach.
She fumbled her way out of the cab and went to the dented front bumper, propping against the side of the headlights while she looked down into the fast current of the river. She pulled a paper towel from her pocket, one she’d used to blot her lipstick that morning, and wiped her sweaty face. Her hands were shaking. She’d never had such a close call. Well, she wasn’t getting back into that truck until she was calm enough to drive safely.
The sound of a car going by on the state road that paralleled this dirt one caught her attention. It was a police car. It slowed just for a few seconds before it shot ahead. The policeman probably wondered what she was doing out here all alone with the front end of her truck hanging over a bank. Well, he could just wonder. She wasn’t going home, not yet. She’d give Judd plenty of time to get away first. She couldn’t bear to see him again right now, with the memory of that kiss eating her alive.
* * *
Judd was walking back to his SUV when he saw Maude standing on the back stoop, looking concerned.
He turned and went within earshot, smiling gently. “
Something wrong?” he asked.
“Did Crissy tell you?” she asked abruptly.
He scowled. “Tell me what?”
Maude hesitated. “Have you seen her?”
“No. Should I have?” he demanded impatiently.
“She was on her way to talk to you,” Maude amended. “I don’t see her truck.”
He felt his body tense. If Christabel had come to the barn, she must have seen him with Tippy. He’d kissed her to keep the assistant director, Gary, from trying to put the make on her again. The man was becoming a pest. It had been completely innocent, a stage kiss. But if Christabel had seen them...
“What was she going to talk to me about?” he asked, thinking about how often he tripped over Grier when he came here. It had gotten to the point that he hardly spoke to Christabel. He was so jealous he couldn’t even hide it anymore.
Maude cleared her throat. “I don’t know, she didn’t say,” she hedged. She drew in a long breath. “I suppose she went to get the mail or something. Never mind.”
Maude went back into the house. Judd hesitated. Maude was acting strangely. He wondered why Christabel hadn’t made her presence known. It wasn’t like her to ignore what she’d think of as betrayal. The old Christabel would have raised hell and he and Tippy would have had a royal battle on their hands. It bothered him that Christabel had walked away without saying anything.
He got into his truck and decided to run into town and see if she was at the post office. But even as he put it in gear, he heard a call on the police band.
“Is Cash around?” a young man asked.
“He’s in conference with Chief Blake and the city manager. Why?”
“When he comes out, tell him that his lady is standing on the banks of the river next to her truck out on J. Davis Road, would you?”
“Why does he need to know?” the dispatcher queried.
“Because the front wheels of the truck are barely on the bank, and so is she,” the young man replied. “If I were him, I’d get out there quick.”
“I’ll tell him the minute he comes out. It shouldn’t be long.”
“Thanks.” The young man gave his vehicle’s call sign and left the air.
Judd burned rubber getting out onto the road.
Christabel heard the approach of a vehicle and she tensed. It was a lonely place, and she could find herself in trouble. Maybe it was just that policeman who’d gone by earlier, wondering why she was here. She hoped it wasn’t someone looking for trouble.
The big black SUV came into view and her body tensed. The last person on earth she wanted to see right now was Judd Dunn. Her dark eyes glared daggers as he stopped behind her truck and got out with an economy of motion.
She was wearing her sneakers, which robbed her of height. He looked very big in his leather boots and cream-colored Stetson, with that big .45 caliber Colt automatic in its hand-tooled leather holster on his hip. The silver Ranger badge glittered in the sun, like his black eyes as he approached her.
“You’re too close to the bank,” he said without preamble.
She folded her arms tight over her chest and averted her gaze back to the current. “I’m not,” she argued.
He stopped just behind her, waiting for her to speak, to accuse him, to explain. But she didn’t.
“What are you doing out here alone?” he persisted.
“I had some things to work out,” she said in a strange tone.
He hesitated. He didn’t know how to ask if she’d seen him with Tippy in the barn.
“What things?” he asked instead.
She drew in a steadying breath and turned. Her eyes were just faintly red, but she was calm and resolute. “I want you to buy me out.”
It was the last thing he’d have expected her to say. He was bereft of speech for several long seconds. “What?”
“I’ve decided that I don’t want to spend the rest of my life trying to raise beef, despite the Japanese deal,” she said calmly. “I’ve got a little money saved. I don’t want to go back to the vocational school. I want to go to college.”
“All right,” he said. “I’ll talk to Murchison at the bank. You can live at the ranch while you commute...”
“You misunderstand me,” she interrupted. “I’m going to school in San Antonio, not here.”
She was going to leave. He wouldn’t see her again. The ranch that had been their primary link would be his alone. She would live in another town, work in another town. She wouldn’t be here when he came to look at the books, check the livestock, pick out the culls. He wouldn’t see her at all, even with Grier. The thought paralyzed him.
“I’d like to leave at the end of the month,” she added. “If you can’t tie things up by then, it doesn’t matter. Arrange it however you like. I’ll sign any sort of papers.”
He scowled ferociously. Something was very wrong. She loved the ranch. It had been in her family for three generations. She’d hated even sharing it with him, at first. Now she wanted to leave it for good. Why?
“Maude said you had something to tell me,” he said. “Was this it?”
“Yes,” she said, grateful that Maude hadn’t been more forthcoming with him. San Antonio wasn’t far enough, but it was a good jumping off point. She’d go there and then find someplace else to escape to, before she started showing.
“Christabel,” he began.
Before he could organize his thoughts, he heard a siren and a very loud, racing engine. They both turned in time to see a Jacobsville police car come roaring down the dirt road, leaving a huge wake of dust. Grier, damn him!
Grier slammed to a stop and barely took time to cut off the siren and the lights before he got out and strode quickly toward Christabel.
“You okay?” he asked abruptly, ignoring Judd altogether.
She felt a wave of relief. Now Judd couldn’t pump her for information. “I’m okay,” she said. “I just needed a quiet place to think.”
Grier wasn’t buying it. His eyes narrowed and he stared at her doggedly. “I’ll follow you back to the ranch,” he said.
Christabel let out an angry sigh. “I don’t need a keeper!”
“The hell you don’t,” Grier ground out. “Look where you’ve parked!”
“I’m a good foot off the bank!” she argued.
Grier held out his hand. She glared at him, but she gave him her truck key.
“I’ll move it back. What are you doing out here?” he asked Judd belatedly.
“Talking to my wife,” he returned with mocking arrogance.
“I’m not your wife,” Christabel choked. “I’m just the hired help.”
Grier wisely left them alone and went to move her car.
“What the hell does that mean?” Judd demanded.
She wouldn’t look at him. She wrapped her arms tight around her chest. “I’m cold.”
He glanced at her bare arms and his voice softened. “No wonder. You aren’t even wearing a sweater.”
She ignored him, watching Grier whip the truck around with easy expertise.
Judd’s sigh was audible. “We need to sit down and talk...”
She met his eyes evenly. “I have nothing to talk to you about ever again,” she said solemnly. “Talk is just words. They don’t mean anything.”
His jaw tautened. “You saw me with Tippy,” he said gruffly. “I can explain.”
“What do you care what I think?” she asked evenly. “I’m not part of your life. I never was.”
He winced. “Christabel...”
“Crissy! Let’s go! You’ll catch cold standing out here!” Grier said shortly.
She forced a smile for him. “Look who else isn’t wearing a jacket,” she accused gently.
Grier looked as if he’d die keeping his mouth
shut, but he did.
She shrugged. “Okay. I’m coming.”
Judd’s big fists were clenched at his sides. “Wait a minute.”
She looked up at him. “Your life is your own business now. I won’t interfere. I’ll expect the same courtesy from you.”
“Damn it!”
“You saved the ranch, Judd,” she said quietly. “You saved me, too. You’ve sacrificed five years of your life just keeping me solvent. I’ll never forget what I owe you. But I don’t expect you to go on making sacrifices for me,” she added huskily. “If anyone ever deserved a little happiness, it’s you. I’m...glad you have Tippy, waiting for you. I won’t stand in your way.”
She moved back from him, like a shadow merging with the forest, and her attention went to Grier, who was holding the driver’s door open for her. He handed her the truck key.
“Okay, I’m going home,” she told Cash, making a face at him and laughing.
He smiled back. “Don’t speed.”
“I never speed.”
“Ha!”
She got into the truck and drove off. She didn’t look at Judd as she passed him.
Judd stalked over to Grier, who was getting back into his patrol car. “She isn’t divorced yet,” he said in a blatant challenge.
Grier gave him a cold look. “She might as well be, for all the notice you take of her lately.”
“How could I take notice of her when I can’t come to my own ranch without tripping over you! Besides, my relationship with Christabel isn’t your business.”
Grier only smiled. “We’ll see about that.” He started the police car.
“What do you know that I don’t?” Judd asked abruptly.
Grier hesitated uncharacteristically. “Ask her. Better yet, ask Maude. That’s how I found out.”
Before Judd could persist, Grier drove away.
* * *
But Judd wasn’t giving up. He knew something was going on, and he had a sinking feeling that he was involved. He followed Grier to town and right into the police station.