I motioned to Hazel that I’d be right back and hurried into the kitchen so that Marley wouldn’t overhear my side of the conversation. “I thought you had a backup plan.”
“I did, but they’ve come down with a vomiting bug. Even if they’re better by then, I don’t want to risk the spread of germs. I don’t suppose you could do it.”
“I need to keep my schedule flexible so I can finish my article on Winston York on time. There are a few paranormals I still need to talk to.” I couldn’t tell her about the murder investigation, so I stuck to my usual story. “What about Florian?”
“He has plans every night this week. Linnea’s occupied with the inn. Bryn has a paper due on Friday and no way am I asking Hudson. I adore my nephew, but he’s not equipped to look after my two.”
I drummed my fingers on the island. “What about Artemis?”
“Artemis Haverford? She’s ancient.”
“I know, but she’s great with Marley and she has her own ghost to keep the boys in line. The downside is you’d have to bring them to her. She won’t come to you.”
“Hmm. Any port in a storm, though, right?”
“Depends on how badly you want this dinner.”
I could practically hear her frowning. “I’ve worked myself up to telling Sterling about my Sidhe Shed idea. I’d hate to bail now.”
“I bet she’d be thrilled to have the twins there. Her house is enormous. They can play-and-seek the entire time you’re gone.”
Aster sighed. “That sounds promising. Thanks, Ember. I’ll give her a call.”
“Be patient while she comes to the phone. She moves as slowly as you’d expect.” I hustled back to Hazel before the witch clobbered me with the Big Book of Scribbles.
“Can we get back to work now or do you have a marching band scheduled to come through in a minute?” she asked.
I arched an eyebrow. “Someone needs a good mood ring.” I took my seat across from her. “Why don’t we get started on that emerald bracelet?”
Hazel perked up. “Really? You’re sure?”
“I am. It’ll give me something to show off to my aunt at dinner. Let’s weld…or whatever we do.”
Raoul sighed. Don’t come crying to me when you lose it.
I assume you mean the bracelet.
Sure, yeah. Let’s go with that.
Chapter Nine
I lingered in the expansive foyer of Thornhold with a glass of wine in my hand.
“Oh, Ember. Good. You’ve dressed appropriately tonight.” Aunt Hyacinth descended the sweeping staircase with a half-empty cocktail glass in her hand. She wore a floor-length kaftan adorned with cat eyes. No cat heads or bodies—just their eyes.
I glanced down at my green dress that I’d worn to match my new emerald bracelet. “As opposed to?”
“Every other night?” Aunt Hyacinth even managed to shrug elegantly, despite the creepy frock.
“Why are you suddenly concerned with how I look?” I burst into laughter. “Sorry. For a second, I forgot who I was talking to.”
My aunt fingered the string of black pearls around her neck. “An old friend will be joining us tonight and I’d like to give him the right impression.”
My brow lifted. “An old friend you’ve seen naked?”
Aunt Hyacinth’s stony expression revealed only her displeasure. “Really, Ember. Must your mind go directly to your familiar’s stomping grounds?”
An idea bloomed. “Wait, you said an old friend. Is it Lionel Lattimer, the CEO of a very successful cosmetics company?”
She appeared taken aback. “Why, yes. How did you guess? I’ve known him for decades.”
I sipped my wine and tried to play it cool. This dinner was suddenly looking up. “I’m a big fan of Simply Sparkles.”
“You’re familiar with his products?” She scrutinized my face. “No. I don’t think so.”
I pressed the pads of my fingers to my cheeks. “Hey! I only need a light foundation and a swipe of lipstick.”
“If you say so.” My aunt turned toward Simon as the butler swooped into the room with a tray of fresh drinks like the fleet-footed bartender he was. “Impeccable timing as always.”
Simon swapped her empty glass for a full one. Not to be outdone, I slurped down the remainder of my wine to trade it for another one. I wasn’t competitive about many things, but alcohol consumption might just be one of them.
My aunt leveled me with a look. “Let’s mind our manners for our special guest, shall we?”
I froze with an empty glass in one hand and a full one in the other. “So, no double fisting?”
She turned up her nose and sipped her cocktail. “Simon, where is my wayward son?”
“Your wish has been granted.” Florian glided into the room wearing a turquoise T-shirt featuring the tepen curled around an egg. Even in a ridiculous top, my cousin managed to look hot. Some paranormals had all the luck.
Aunt Hyacinth’s scowl was unmistakable. “Florian, this is a family dinner. You’re not seeing one of your filthy bands in a bar basement.”
My head swiveled to my cousin. “Filthy bands? The next time you go to see one of those, will you tell me? It’s been ages since the soles of my shoes have been sticky.”
My aunt’s lips thinned. “I’ll refrain from comment.”
“That’ll be a first,” I mumbled.
“We have a guest joining us this evening,” she said, her focus back on Florian. “I would’ve hoped to see you in nicer attire like Ember.”
I smiled broadly and squared my shoulders. “Yes, like me. Poster child for appropriateness.”
“You wanted me to take a more active role in an organization, so I have,” Florian said. “Now you’re going to complain that you don’t like the way I do it?”
“You’re lowering the town’s profile with cheap and tacky merchandise,” Aunt Hyacinth complained. “You’ll end up attracting the wrong kind of tourists.”
“The kind with money to spend?” I asked.
“If they’re picking up tat like tepen T-shirts, then they don’t have enough money to spend.”
“But you always say money doesn’t buy good taste,” Florian said. He gestured to his top. “I’m testing your theory.”
Aunt Hyacinth huffed and turned to me. “It’s too bad Marley couldn’t make it. I was hoping to show her off.”
“Schoolwork is the priority,” I said.
“I think it’s excellent that she’s so focused on her studies,” my aunt said. “The Black Hat Academy is an excellent school, one of the best in the nation, in fact.”
“Ah, yes. The best. Whatever that means.” I sipped my wine.
“Please, Ember. You know perfectly well there’s a hierarchy in all facets of life. That’s how the world works.”
“Good thing we can bust out our Descendant of the One True Witch card whenever we need to feel superior.”
Florian eyed the tray that Simon still held. “Any ale, Simon?”
“Certainly, Master Florian.” The butler bowed and retreated to the kitchen.
“No Craig tonight?” I asked. My aunt was currently happily ensconced in a relationship with a wizard. I’d hoped the romance would soften her a bit, but she was the same steely witch I’d come to know and fear.
“Craig is with his sister,” Aunt Hyacinth said. “He sends his regards. Aster can’t make it either. She and her family already had plans, which is probably just as well. The twins seem to be going through a wild phase. I blame their father.”
Of course she did. The doorbell rang and Simon materialized with Florian’s ale and continued to the door.
“Why are we the early birds?” I asked. If I’d known I could be late without consequences, I would’ve spent another ten minutes on the couch doing absolutely nothing.
“Because I assumed you and Florian would be late as you always are, so I gave you an earlier arrival time.”
Simon entered the room with a shadowy figure behind him.
“Mr. La
ttimer.” Simon bowed and made himself scarce.
Lionel Lattimer strode into the room. The vampire was tall and slender with a mustache so bushy, it could qualify as a familiar.
“Lionel, how wonderful to see you. I’m so pleased you let me know you were in town.” Aunt Hyacinth held out her hand and he brought it to his lips, careful to avoid his fangs.
“I couldn’t possibly come to Starry Hollow and not call on you, dearest Hyacinth.”
“You remember my son, Florian.”
Lionel regarded him. “You were a lanky teenager the last time I saw you.”
“And this lovely young woman is my niece.”
I extended a hand. “Ember Rose.”
Aunt Hyacinth placed her hand on my arm. “Ember is a reporter for Vox Populi.”
“How wonderful. And what about you, Florian?” His gaze flicked over the tepen T-shirt.
“He’s working tirelessly on behalf of the tourism board,” Aunt Hyacinth interjected.
“I should like one of those shirts,” Lionel said. “Not such a bright color though. I wouldn’t want the tepen to spot me a mile away.”
The doorbell rang again, signaling the arrival of Linnea and her kids. I was relieved when my aunt ushered us into the dining room because I was starving.
We took our usual seats with Lionel seated across from me in Marley’s chair.
“Tell us, Ember. What are you working on now?” Aunt Hyacinth prompted.
“It started as an article about Winston York’s search for the tepen, but it’s morphed into a Winston York remembrance piece.”
“A real loss for the global community,” Lionel said.
“Is the tepen that dangerous?” Hudson asked. “Like should I not be building my fort in the woods right now?”
“I wouldn’t be concerned,” my aunt said. “From what I’ve read, unless the creature deems you a threat to itself or its nest, it won’t bother you.”
“Kind of like you,” I said, flashing a mischievous smile at my aunt.
“That tracks with what I’ve heard,” Linnea chimed in. “According to my guest at Palmetto House, the tepen probably felt attacked by York.”
I was so intent on the conversation and watching Lionel’s reaction to it that I barely heard the voice in my head.
You’re holding your cutlery wrong.
I stiffened. Raoul?
Who else?
I surveyed the dining room. Where are you?
Under the table. I crept in after the appetizers and nobody was the wiser.
I felt a paw tap my foot. You shouldn’t be here. What if Precious gets wind of you? My aunt’s familiar would have a literal hissy fit.
You don’t need to worry about that albino hairball.
Raoul, this is a family dinner. You don’t need to be here.
Sounds like the ideal opportunity for your accountability coach to shine.
“Ember, could you please pass the potatoes?” Aster asked.
“Sure.”
As I reached for the oval dish, Raoul’s voice echoed in my head. Your wrists are weak so use two hands, and whatever you do, don’t drop the potatoes.
Naturally, I dropped them. The dish hit the table and spuds rolled in every direction, including straight off the table and onto Lionel’s lap.
“I’m so sorry,” I said.
I’ll get it, Raoul said.
“No!” The thought of a raccoon paw reaching for Lionel’s lap spurred me into action and I ducked my head under the table to stop him.
“Ember Rose, sit up this instant,” Aunt Hyacinth said firmly.
“But…” What was I going to say? Please excuse the circus, Aunt Hyacinth, but my woodland accountability coach has positioned himself under the table?
Hudson sniffed the air. “Why do I smell wet dog?”
“Because you’re sweaty?” Bryn shot back.
“Takes one to know one,” Hudson said.
Linnea gave them a pointed look. “Let’s stop now before it escalates.”
“Bryn has a boyfriend,” Hudson announced. “I saw them kissing by their lockers at school.”
“I do not.” The pink hue of her cheeks told me that Hudson was telling the truth.
“This isn’t appropriate dinner conversation,” my aunt said.
“There’s nothing appropriate about them,” Hudson continued. “You should hear the disgusting sounds they make when they’re kissing. Like two animals being experimented on.” His eyes rounded and he looked at Lionel. “No offense.”
“I don’t take offense to that. Testing is a necessary part of our business. If we don’t test on a living creature, how can we know whether our product is safe for someone like your mother?”
“So you’re prioritizing one life over another,” Bryn said.
“Don’t we all do that?” Lionel asked smoothly. He’d clearly handled these types of questions many times before. “If your mother and an animal were drowning and you could only save one, you’d choose your mother, wouldn’t you?”
“Depends on the day,” Bryn muttered.
Uh oh. I could see this conversation heading downhill quickly. “So, Mr. Lattimer, are you in town to see the tepen?”
The vampire smiled broadly. “That’s right. I’m hoping to capture it. My preference is the adult, but I’d take the one that hatches in a pinch.” He dipped his bread in the remaining gravy on his plate and took a bite.
“You would experiment on a baby of one of the rarest creatures in the world?” Bryn asked. Her contempt was written all over her youthful face.
“As I said, the adult is the priority, but we’ll take what we can get.” He didn’t seem at all bothered by her outrage.
“Do you have any idea how rare the tepen is?” Florian asked.
Lionel looked at him askance. “Of course I do, and that’s why I’m here. The value of its secretions is…Well, I can’t put a price on it.”
Aunt Hyacinth appeared equally unconcerned. “I don’t see what everyone is so worked up about. It’s Darwinism at work. If these tepens can’t get their act together to increase their population size, then it’s not our job to do that for them.”
“Ah, the old bootstraps argument for a supernatural sea serpent,” I said.
Your aunt doesn’t like when you make jokes at her expense, especially at her own dinner party with an honored guest.
I’m well aware, thank you.
Just checking, you know, as your accountability coach.
I rolled my eyes, regretting my decision to placate the raccoon.
“My company stands to make millions,” Lionel said. “Isn’t it far better for me to apprehend the tepen and extract a positive contribution to the world than to simply let it slip back into the sea and die alone?”
“You mean a positive contribution to your bank account,” Bryn said.
“The financial incentive aside, I don’t see the harm,” Lionel continued. “The tepen dies either way.”
“But it dies with dignity in the ocean once it knows the next generation is safe,” I said. “In your hands, it dies the death of a lab rat.”
Lionel fixed me with a condescending stare. “Does a monster need dignity, Ms. Rose?”
“You’re a vampire,” I shot back. “You tell me.”
Zing! Direct hit! Raoul said from under the table.
“Ember,” my aunt scolded me. “Please refrain from being rude to my guest. I would think you of all paranormals would think twice before referring to a vampire as a monster.”
“You’re right.” I straightened in my chair. “I apologize for the remark, but my point stands. A monster, or whatever you want to call the tepen, deserves dignity as much as any living creature.”
Lionel ran his cloth napkin along his fangs. “I am quite accustomed to standing on the opposite side of an ethical line. I can assure you that I won’t budge on this issue. If this one creature can provide a substance that allows us to help millions of customers, then that outweighs the need for
a dignified death in my view.”
“Easy for an immortal to say,” Bryn huffed.
“I think you and I have different definitions of ‘help,’” I said. “I might be more willing to consider your point of view if we were talking about an incurable disease, but we’re not. We’re talking about superficial reasons.”
Back away slowly, Raoul advised. No one is changing anybody else’s mind at the dinner table. It’s a guaranteed outcome like hitting every red light when you’re in a hurry.
Lionel set down his fork and gave me an appraising look. “You’re wearing makeup this evening, are you not? I see a faint shimmer of bronzing powder. A bit of mascara and, of course, lipstick.”
I sank against the back of my chair. “It’s foundation, not bronzing powder.”
“How would you feel if you couldn’t wear these products? Old? Haggard?”
“These products are made without sacrificing the life of a creature that deserves better,” I argued.
“The dignity, not the life,” he reminded me. “Two very different things.”
“Unless the tepen escapes you and you take the egg instead,” I said. “You said you’d be willing to do that—take what you can get?”
Annoyance flickered in Lionel’s eyes. “I have a responsibility to my customers, Ms. Rose, not to these strange monsters and their supporters.”
“I take it you’ve encountered Winston York before,” I said. There was no point in passing up the opportunity to question him about his death.
“Naturally,” Lionel said. “It’s inevitable that we’d cross paths when you’re as dogged as I am in pursuit of the best ingredients.”
“I still use that youth serum you sent me years ago,” Aunt Hyacinth said. “I buy a new jar every six months like clockwork.”
“I can tell,” Lionel said, smiling at her. “You practically glow, my dear.”
Raoul made a gagging sound.
“Did anyone hear that?” Linnea asked. “It sounds like Precious might be throwing up a hairball somewhere.”
“Linnea,” my aunt said sternly.
“Have you seen York since your arrival in town?” I asked.
“Ember, this is not the time to quiz our guest.” My aunt’s warning tone was loud and clear.
Magic & Monsters (Starry Hollow Witches Book 12) Page 9