by Lara Norman
“While I was sitting at home wallowing and seeing all these ads on TV about how you could go to trade school and be taught the basics,” he answered her question. “They talked about how quickly you could get to work, and I suddenly wanted that very much. I was twenty-four when I went to school and began an apprenticeship. It worked out for the best, as you can see. I worked for the Blair brothers for three years before I’d saved enough money to attempt to go out on my own. It was bad at first, trying to gain enough customers to make a living. Slowly, though, I gained momentum and did bigger jobs and higher profile clients. I was determined not to live off of my parents my entire life.”
“You endured and survived a tragic event and it made you stronger.” She had more
admiration for him than she did before he told her his story, and that was saying a lot.
He smiled at her. “That’s the positive way of looking at it.”
They stared at each other for a minute before Cora yawned again. Warren sighed. “I should get going.”
She didn't want him to go, but he needed to for both of their sanity. “That’s probably for the best.”
They stood simultaneously and then lingered awkwardly in front of the couch. “I’ll, uh, walk you out.”
Her sweater had slipped off her shoulder again, and Warren couldn't help but reach out and ghost his forefinger over the exposed skin. It was exactly as soft as he had convinced himself it would be. His pants were growing more and more uncomfortable. “Good night, Cora.”
She breathed out loudly but didn't say anything, just backed up to the door. Warren followed her, sticking to her side like he was glued there. She moved until there was no- where else to go, and he moved with her, crushing his mouth down on hers when they bumped into the door. His hands roamed to her back and under the sweater, along her warm skin until he found that he was right; she wasn’t wearing a bra. Unable to hold back any longer, Cora kissed him greedily, drinking from him and begging him for more. He let his tongue wander, pressing it to her lips until she opened her mouth and drew him in. Her hands went to his hair, the thick strands weaving through her fingers in a rush of satin. It felt the way she’d envisioned, and a spear of lust lanced through her abdomen. He touched her boldly, moving around to her belly and feeling the muscles quiver as he began a slow ascent.
“Warren.” She gasped for air against his mouth. “Warren,” she repeated. If they continued exploring, touching and kissing, she wouldn't be able to say goodbye.
It wasn't until she repeated his name that he realized he had two handfuls of her delicate breasts. “I’m sorry.” He gasped as he laid his forehead against her chest.
He let her go and stepped back, looking at her mussed hair and ravaged mouth. Her clothes were askew and her eyes were dark. He wanted nothing more at that moment than to ask where her bedroom was. Instead, he moved away from her until he found his coat. As he slid it on, Cora rested one hand on her stomach to calm the jittering.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said quietly.
She nodded, too overwhelmed to say anything. He pressed a kiss to her cheek and waited for her to move away from the door before disappearing into the cold dark of night.
Cora stood dumbly in her foyer, wondering why she’d let him leave.
Fifteen
Cora wasn't sure what the hell had happened in her foyer, but she knew she wasn’t going to be able to sleep that night. She laid in bed for hours with her eyes wide open as she stared at the ceiling. Warren’s words about his fiancée and his life after her death went around on a loop in her brain. He wasn’t perfect, he had flaws, and he’d struggled with loss. She figured he was a better person for it in the long run, but she wanted to know what his coping mechanisms had been. Was he a recovering addict? Did she have to worry that he would relapse? Did he have an addictive personality that she would have to be careful about? Were her feelings real, or a product of her loneliness? If Warren had come into her life after the holidays, would she be more or less inclined to fall for him?
She wasn't sure why she had so many questions nagging her. There was no particular impetus to make her pick him at the holidays versus any other time of year. She wasn’t more lonely at Christmas time as far as she knew. She’d never put much thought into it, preferring to ignore anything that didn’t work for her schedule. It had never been in her thoughts that Julia and Andy were right, but maybe that was the crux of the matter. Maybe she needed a kick in the backside toward happiness, and now she was overthinking it for fear of failing. She knew she tended toward overthinking everything, but it had served her well in the past and she’d never found a reason to change. Until Warren.
His kisses had drugged her, pulling her under the influence of some spell that she wasn’t sure she wanted to be under. At the same time, it had felt right and amazing to be
kissed by Warren. Not just any kiss, but one by him in particular. He wanted her, she knew, and she could admit that she wanted him, too. She was no longer sure what was up and what was down, but she was sure she needed to sleep on it in order to make an informed decision. If only sleep would come to her.
“Morning, Cora,” Andy said cheerfully when her boss stepped in the front doors seconds behind her.
“Yeah, yeah,” Cora muttered as she made her way to the break room with her purse in hand and coat still on.
“That rough?” Andy asked as Cora poured a cup of coffee and drank it without letting it cool off.
Cora grimaced as the coffee burned her throat. She topped off her mug and blew on it, staring at Andy who watched her warily. “I couldn't sleep last night.”
“Because you had a good time, I hope.” Andy was almost as giddy with the idea that Cora could have gotten some with the delivery guy as she would have been if it had been herself getting laid.
“No, because I don’t know what the hell I’m doing with Warren and my brain wouldn't shut the hell up. I spent the night overthinking after he went home.” Cora slumped into the nearest chair and let her purse drop to the floor, her neck no longer willing to support her head and her eyes closing. Andy got the coffee pot and refilled Cora’s half-empty mug before getting herself a cup.
“After a goodnight kiss, I hope? Some groping and tonsil hockey?” Andy scrounged for pastries left in the cabinet but found none.
Cora’s head snapped up and she rubbed the kink out of the back of it. “Why would you call it that?”
“Because I’m a fourteen-year-old boy trapped in a lesbian’s body.” Sitting next to her friend and boss, she drank some coffee and tried to be objective as she looked at the dark half-moons under Cora’s eyes. “You look like hell. Is he coming by today?”
“As far as I know they're open through the holidays. He said he’d see me today, so I guess the answer is yes.”
Julia came into the room then and gave Cora the stink eye. “That lack of sleep would look better on you if there was also an after-sex glow.”
“Wow, guys. What the hell is this, the push Cora to have sex show?” She rubbed her temples and tried not to think of how much concealer she’d used that morning just to be told she looked like shit.
“Well, I can tell when you’re miserable and when you’re satisfied with yourself and life in general, so I can only assume that you didn't seal the deal with kindling-man.” Julia also poured coffee and sat at the breakroom table.
“Why is he kindling-man?” Cora asked with a frown.
Julia smirked over the top of her mug. “Because he doesn't even need kindling to start a fire, just his fine, hot ass.”
Cora rolled her eyes. “For crying out loud, you two.” She went back to rubbing her temples. Her friends were more immature than she would have guessed.
“Why are you so determined that everything will go wrong?” Andy asked Cora.
“I’m coming to realize that I need to work on myself. I have problems that are preventing me from sustaining a long-lasting relationship.”
“What kind of bullshit is t
hat?” Andy asked.
It hurt to admit how broken she was, but she needed their advice. “It's pretty obvious what my flaws are. I work too much, I stay hidden in my shell, I never bend on anything. Somebody stop me,” Cora said on a sigh.
“You're a great boss, with the right mix of professionalism and camaraderie. You tend to be generous. You may hate the holidays, but you don’t begrudge others their happiness with it as long as they keep a respectful distance. You’ve never told me I can’t wear a Christmas sweater, at least.” Andy shrugged.
“You’re smart, hon. You work hard. You’re kind. Don’t make me reach over and bitch slap some sense into you. Any man would be lucky to have you, and Warren is clearly interested in being that man.”
Cora smiled pitifully at Julia. “I don’t want to make his life harder than it is. He went through some stuff that leaves me concerned.”
“Is this some excuse you’ve made up so you don’t have to put yourself out there and date?” Julia narrowed her eyes as she asked. It would be just like Cora to make a big deal out of nothing.
“Not exactly.”
Andy and Julia waited while Cora fiddled with her empty cup. She spun it in circles and let it rattle back in place before she spoke again. “His fiancée died when they were in college. He admits he went through some incredibly hard times where he dropped out of school and suffered from depression.”
She fell silent as the other two pondered what she’d told them. “Okay, so why does that give you pause?” Julia said. “Did he say anything terrible that you can’t live with?” Julia was pretty sure the answer was no. If there’d been anything in his past that Cora couldn't live with, that would have been the first thing out of her mouth.
“No, not really. I guess my brain went into overdrive worrying that he’d turned to drugs and that maybe he was unstable because of it.” She sighed. “That’s probably an excuse, like you said. I can’t seem to turn my brain off and just let myself be happy.”
Andy patted her on the hand. “If there’s anything you’d be uncomfortable with, you should ask him outright if that’s what happened to him.”
“You’re right. I’ll put it out of my mind until I see him again, and then I’ll just ask.”
Sixteen
Putting her worries out of her mind was easier said than done. Cora spent the morning stewing in her own thoughts and accomplished much less at work than she should have. She could only focus on what time Warren would come to the office and what sort of personal questions were appropriate for her to ask him in that type of setting with a limited amount of time.
Her entire morning was spent finalizing important paperwork that was due before the end of the year. Most of the businesses they dealt with were closed from the twenty-third or twenty-fourth until the second of January, which forced her to move her deadlines up. She didn't even realize lunchtime had come and passed until there was a knock on her mostly open door.
“Cora, you haven't taken a lunch break.” Cora glanced up to see Andy standing there with one hand braced on the door frame looking worried.
Cora pushed some stray hairs off her forehead and her shoulders slumped. “Oh, I hadn't even noticed. I’m doing a terrible job of focusing this morning.” She scooped her ponytail off her nape and held it out so she could fan her neck in the front and back.
“Do you want me to run out and get you a sandwich or something?”
“You know what? That would be fantastic. I don’t even have a granola bar with me today.” Cora smiled warmly at Andy. She had great coworkers, and she knew she could also count them as friends.
“Reuben?” Andy double-checked.
“With extra dressing. Thanks.”
Cora watched Andy leave and wondered where Warren was. He typically came by around the middle part of the afternoon, and since she had worked through the day until three, she was surprised she had yet to see him. She managed to finish what she’d been working on and took a quick break when Andy came back with her lunch. She even invited Andy to sit with her while she ate, and they talked about a bunch of nothing to help distract Cora.
She was starting to be truly worried as she gathered a stack of papers she needed to run up to the second floor. Maybe he’d had the same second thoughts she briefly did and was making it easier on them both by quitting his second job. She didn’t think she would be very happy if he didn't show up ever again because she’d gotten used to seeing his face every day. Judging by the fact that she noticed when he was running late, she obviously considered him to be so reliable that she could set her clock by him. If he never showed up again, she would miss his sunny smile and good looks, his affable nature, and frankly, his magnetism. She
would miss the way he kept trying to sneak a kiss in her office lately, even though she knew she had to be extra careful with that sort of thing in order to maintain her professional reputation.
Cora headed to the elevator, picturing his face when he’d told her about Heather. He’d been heartbroken, even though it had been so many years in the past. It was clear the devastating events had stayed with him long into adulthood. The doors closed behind her with a whoosh and she thought about how Warren was donating his salary to the local orphanage. That was incredibly selfless and generous, and it was a testament to his character that he would take on the extra hours of a second job simply to give away his paycheck.
She heard the ding that announced the elevator had reached its destination, but her head was downstairs in her office with the delivery guy, and she stayed rooted to the spot.
“Cora?”
She stared at Susan with a frown on her face. Cora couldn't say how long she’d been
standing in the open elevator. She stepped out and stood on the blue and green patterned carpet next to her colleague. “Yeah, hey. Sorry, I’m a bit foggy-brained today.”
“Are you bringing me the figures for the Graham account?” Susan asked with an edge to her voice.
“Yes.” Cora drew out the word because she was leery at the expression on the other woman’s face.
“They’ve made changes. Lots of them.” Susan sounded heavily agitated.
Cora groaned. “This close to the holidays? Don’t they know I have to send my employees home at some point in time?” Cora would have banged her head on the wall, but she thought maybe it was unprofessional.
“I don’t think it’s occurred to them to care. We need the changes done by end of day tomorrow.” At least Susan had the decency to look sympathetic.
“Great. Looks like I’m staying here tonight.”
“Sorry.” Susan handed her the new paperwork and turned on her heel before fleeing the area. Cora couldn't blame her for rushing off.
Sighing, Cora got back in the elevator and hung her head as she read over the changes she would have to make. She was so frustrated at the amount of work it was going to take, and she knew she couldn't leave it to anyone else to do. It wasn't fair to them. They all had families and others close to them coming in for the holidays.
The ding alerted her to her arrival on the first floor, and she looked up so she could step off the elevator. What she spotted had her heart picking up its pace.
Warren was backing in the front doors while he toted the handcart awkwardly. She felt a little lighter as she looked at him, a little less like the world was going to pull her under and drown her before Christmas. She went in his direction at a fast clip, her high heels clicking on the tile of the foyer.
“Warren,” she said, and even she could hear the honeyed tone to her voice.
He looked over at her as the doors closed behind him. The snow outside was swirling in heavy clouds like airborne paste. Most of Warren’s clothes were covered in the soggy flakes. He’d pulled a black knit cap over his head and covered his ears with it, which she thought made him look adorable.
“Hey, Cora. It’s crazy out there today.”
“Well, come on in and take a minute to warm up.”
He gave her a grateful
smile and appraised the way she looked. She was flushed, as though she’d overheated and hadn’t cooled down yet. Her hair was in a low ponytail with a few loose tendrils stuck to the back of her neck, and there was a pen tucked behind one ear. He didn’t notice the dark circles or the droopiness of her shoulders, he only noticed that she looked great to him.
“I didn’t think I was going to make it here today.” He followed her to her office as he spoke. Her derriere was showcased by a tight pencil skirt, something he appreciated greatly.
“I admit that I was surprised that you weren’t here yet.” She set down the offending paperwork from upstairs and temporarily put it out of her mind.
“Then you must not have looked outside.” Warren began unloading the boxes he’d brought in.
“No, I was buried in work, as usual.” She walked to her window and opened the vertical blinds. There was no sun to speak of, and the snow seemed to have bleached the color of the sky. It somehow looked worse than when she met him at the door.
“I don’t see how your gifts are going to arrive on time,” Warren spoke from behind her.
She suppressed a sigh. It would be the first year she didn't hand out gifts on the last day of work. “I know. Everything was due to ship today, but who knows when it’ll actually arrive. I’ve already informed everyone via email that they'll have to wait until they come back from the break. They’ve seen the weather reports, so none of them were terribly surprised.”
“That’s good, then. You can hand them out as a bonus after-holiday deal.” He closed her closet and held out the signature pad.