Books, Blogs and Bloody Murder
An Aggie Underhill Short Story
MICHELLE ANN HOLLSTEIN
Blogs, Books and Bloody Murder, An Aggie Underhill Short Story
Copyright © 2019 Michelle Ann Hollstein
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Book Cover Art: SelfPubBookCovers.com/violaestrella
Ms. Aggie Underhill Mysteries (In Order)
Deadly Withdrawal
Something’s Fishy in Palm Springs
Maid in Heaven
A Hardboiled Murder
One Hell of a Cruise
A Prickly Situation
Vegas or Bust
Dead Ringer
Aggie Underhill Holiday Short Stories
The Case of the Haunted Address
The Mystery of the Beautiful Old Friend
All I Wanted was a Drink
Love is Murder
End of the Rainbow
Coffee, Fireworks and Murder
Books, Blogs and Bloody Murder
A Vienna Rossi Paranormal Mystery
Awakened Within
Beautiful Beginnings
Cheating Heart
Ghostly Gig, A Vienna Rossi Halloween Short Story
Books written under the name
M.A. Hollstein
Fatal Reaction
The Beginning
Survival
Battle of the Hunted
Nightfall
CAST OF CHARACTERS
Aggie Underhill - An independently wealthy widow in her fifties. She’s originally from England and moved to Southern California to be near her daughter, son-in-law, and grandchildren. She has the uncanny ability to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and gets herself involved in all kinds of trouble. Her passion is buying oversized purses, which she calls pocketbooks. She owns one in every style, color, and design imaginable.
Betty Wilcox - Aggie’s best friend for over twenty years. Betty moved with Aggie to Palm Springs to be near her cousin. She lives in a condo next door to Aggie in a luxurious country club on a golf course. No one is privy of Betty’s exact age which is around 60 but she still could pass for late 40s.
Roger Dunlap - Betty’s cousin and only living relative. Roger is a well-known interior decorator and designer in Palm Springs. Even though he has oodles of money, he doesn’t like to part with it. He’s a notorious cheapskate.
Officer Tom Wood - Aggie’s love interest and on-again, off-again boyfriend.
Anita Ferguson - a.k.a. the other grandmother. Anita’s son is married to Aggie’s daughter.
Sherry, Chuck, and Melanie – employees at a local bookstore/coffee shop in Rancho Mirage.
Frances Baxley – a customer of the bookstore/coffee shop.
Books, Blogs and Bloody Murder
Aggie sat across from Betty in the coffee shop at a local bookstore in Rancho Mirage. She reached across the table and supportively squeezed her friend’s hand. “I’m so proud of you. You’re going to do wonderful!” Aggie reassured, even though she wished Betty had changed her protagonist’s name in her blog.
Betty had been writing a blog loosely written around Aggie’s experiences. In her stories, she’d turned Aggie into an amateur detective. Even though Aggie was extremely proud of her best friend, of twenty plus years, she didn’t understand why Betty felt the need to use Aggie’s real name. It irked her to no end.
Betty had written the blog without Aggie’s consent and hadn’t told her about it until after it’d become popular. She’d then said she couldn’t change the name of her main character since she already had a large following.
The worst part of the entire ordeal was that everyone seemed to know about Betty’s blog before Aggie did. And it’d also landed her in hot water, putting her life in danger. But that was a completely different story.
Since Betty’s blog had become such a hit, Betty, with the help of her cousin Roger, had decided to compile her stories and self-publish them. Being that Roger was a lucrative designer-slash-decorator in Palm Springs, he had numerous ties in the desert. He pulled a few strings and had gotten Betty’s new book into all the local libraries and now into a bookstore.
Today, Roger hooked Betty up with a lecture and a book signing at the bookstore in The River, an upscale, outdoor shopping mall located in Rancho Mirage.
Betty forced a weak smile. “Thanks,” she said, looking Aggie in the eye. “I think I’m going to throw up.”
Roger walked over to the table they were sitting at in the coffee shop. He twitched his thick reddish-brown mustache. “You ready?”
Betty looked up at him and Aggie squeezed her hand again.
“I don’t know why I have to speak in front of all these people,” Betty said to Roger.
Roger looked around the bookstore. The turnout wasn’t quite as big as he’d hoped for. He felt he should have advertised better. “There’s not that many people.”
Betty frowned. She hated public speaking. “There’s enough,” she said. “Can’t they just buy my book without me talking about it?” She looked up at her cousin and batted her thick mascara lashes at him. In general, her lash batting got her out of all sorts of messes.
Roger chuckled. “Save your lash batting for someone else. Their effect is useless on me.”
“Fine,” Betty said, pouting. She slid off the chair. “I should’ve known better. At least no one I know besides you two will be here to see me make a fool out of myself.”
“Well,” Roger said, his cheeks reddening. “That’s not entirely true…”
As if on cue, a shrill, high-pitched voice called out, “Yoo hoo! I almost nearly didn’t make it!”
The hairs on the back of Aggie’s neck stood on end at the familiar sound of the irritating voice. She recognized it immediately. Anita, also known as the other grandmother, her archrival, entered the coffee shop.
“You’ve gotta be kidding me,” Aggie groaned. She threw Roger a dirty look.
Sheepishly, he shrugged and put his hands in the air. “What?”
“You know what,” Aggie said beneath her breath.
“The traffic wasn’t too bad,” Anita sang. “But there were a couple of spots that slowed me down a bit. Otherwise, I would’ve been here a lot earlier since I rise every morning with the roosters.” Anita laughed. “You know how some of these California drivers can be… slow as molasses.”
Aggie shook her head. She wished the California drivers were much slower so that Anita would be stuck in traffic somewhere far, far away. Preferably in San Diego County. “What are you doing here?” she asked Anita, a little more harshly than she meant to. “I mean, I thought you were visiting Sarah and helping with the children. Why are you in the desert?”
“Oh, I am helping Sarah,” Anita said, proudly. “I’m multitasking. It’s one of my many talents.”
Aggie frowned. She’d already been perturbed because originally, she’d planned to be in Oceanside helping Sarah with the baby during her grandson, Shawn’s first week back to school. But Anita had taken it upon herself to ruin Aggie’s back-to-school plans by flying out a day before Aggie was meant to arrive.
Aggie had been fuming when Sarah called her. Supposedly, on arrival, Anita had announced that it was a surprise vis
it. But Aggie knew differently. Aggie knew that Anita was gunning for grandma-of-the-year, and that’s why she showed up at Sarah’s house unannounced.
Due to Anita’s surprise visit, Aggie had decided to wait until Anita flew back home to Georgia before visiting Sarah. She didn’t want to be stuck spending time with Anita, competing for the spot of best grandmother. She knew that if they were both in Oceanside at the same time, it’d make Sarah’s life much more stressful. And the idea was to help Sarah, not to make her life more complicated.
Sarah was married to a US Marine, Anita’s son, and they were currently stationed in Camp Pendleton. Before that, Sarah and Everette had been stationed in 29 Palms which was why Aggie had moved to the California desert from England. She’d moved to be near her daughter, and Betty had moved to be near her cousin, Roger.
Recently, Aggie had been looking at small houses that were for sale online near the Oceanside pier. She’d been thinking it would be nice to have a beach house near Sarah.
“When Roger called to tell us about Betty’s book,” Anita explained, “Sarah told me that I should drive out.” Anita beamed. She then looked over at Betty. “Sarah said to tell you she really wanted to be here. She’s sorry she couldn’t make it.”
Betty gave Anita a nervous smile. “Thanks.”
“What’s wrong?” Anita asked, looking Betty up and down. “You don’t look so good. Are you sick?”
“What?” Betty gasped. “Do I look sick?”
“No!” Aggie quickly intervened. “You look beautiful.” She threw Anita a sour look. “Betty is just a little nervous, that’s all.”
“Nervous?” Anita asked. “You’ve never struck me as the nervous type.”
“I-I don’t know.” Betty shrugged. “I don’t like public speaking.”
Anita shook her head and tsk, tsk, tsked. “Poor, poor Betty. You poor, poor dear.”
Aggie couldn’t help but grin. Generally, she was the source of Anita’s tsking. It was nice to have someone else being tsked and poor, poor deared for a change.
“No, really, I’m fine,” Betty said.
“No,” Anita said, shaking her head. “No, you’re not.”
“I am, truly,” Betty said. “It’s just a little bit of nerves. Nothing serious.”
“So strong of you to put on such a brave face. You know as well as I do, that if you mess this up, no one will ever take you seriously as an author. It’ll ruin your career before you’d even gotten started. Such a shame.”
“That’s not true!” Aggie said, shooting daggers with her eyes at Anita. “Betty, don’t you listen to that rubbish!”
“I’m only speaking the truth,” Anita said, tilting her cute little head of bobbed blonde hair to the side. She smiled angelically. “You know what helps me?”
“No, what?” Betty asked, desperate to ease her nerves.
Anita lowered her voice and blushed, “Picture everyone in the audience in their underwear.” She looked around to make sure strangers hadn’t overheard her big secret. “It really works.”
Aggie followed Anita’s glance to an older woman with short, permed copper-colored hair that was streaked with white. She was sitting alone at a table for two, reading a newspaper, and sipping coffee. There was a coffee cup with a lid that had bright orange lipstick on the rim across from her on the table.
“Really?” Betty asked.
Anita nodded and then tapped the side of her nose. “I do it all the time. Especially when I have to speak at one of our HOA meetings for our neighborhood. Works like a charm! Or you can take it one step further and picture them naked.”
Embarrassed that someone may have overheard her, Anita eyed the copper-haired woman again, and then looked over at the counter. There was a tall woman with long, red hair and freckles at the register, and a boy, probably in his late teens, cleaning the tables. A fair-haired man with glasses was looking at the pastries for sale behind the glass.
“Betty,” Aggie interjected, “you’ll be just fine.”
“Come on,” Roger said, breaking up the discussion. “Time to go. They’re waiting for you.”
“You’ll do great,” Aggie reassured again while getting up from the table, coffee in hand, to follow Roger and Betty to the back of the store where they set up a table with copies of her book. To Betty’s surprise, there were about twenty people at the table. And several were handsome men. Betty perked up. She knew exactly what to do with handsome men. She was good at flirting.
“Hello,” she said, batting her lashes while walking up to an extremely handsome man. “I’m Betty.”
Aggie followed Betty to the table at the back of the room and then stopped dead in her tracks. Her jaw dropped as she stared at the poster on a tripod with Betty’s book cover. On the front of the book was a photo of Aggie, carrying a large red purse, which she always referred to as a pocketbook. And in her other hand, she was holding a magnifying glass.
Gasping, she couldn’t believe her eyes. She’d been photo-shopped to look like she was wearing a Sherlock Holmes detective cap and a grey trench coat. The coat was tied at the waist and left open just enough to see quite a bit of cleavage in a very lowcut blouse. She was also wearing an extremely short, tight, black and white checkered skirt, showing off long shapely legs, and was standing in four-inch red stilettos. The color of the shoes matched the bright red lipstick and fingernail polish, as well as, the purse.
Embarrassed as heck, Aggie’s cheeks burned bright red. She could feel them heating up. In fact, they also matched the red stilettos.
Betty had mentioned that her book cover was a surprise designed by Roger, but she’d never mentioned that Aggie would be on the front cover. She was beyond mortified.
“Why don’t you ever wear anything like that for me?” a man’s familiar voice asked from behind.
Aggie spun around to see Officer Tom Wood standing behind her. She and Tom had a sort of on-again, off-again kind of relationship. Tom wanted more than casual dating and Aggie was very fond of him. However, she wasn’t quite ready to move on after her beloved Lionel’s death. It’d been several years since he’d passed, and she knew he would want her to move on and to not be alone, but she just wasn’t ready yet. “Because I don’t wear anything like that period,” she snapped at him.
“You mean,” he said, “you didn’t pose for the cover?”
“No!” she snapped, stuffing her hands on her hips. “Of course not! I didn’t even know I was going to be on the cover. And I can’t even balance in a pair of stilettos, let alone own a pair.”
Tom looked her up and down and then glanced at the giant photo of the book cover. He then raised an eyebrow at her. “I wouldn’t mind, you know…”
Aggie gave him the death stare. With gritted teeth she seethed, “I’m going to give Roger a piece of my mind!”
Tom put his hand on Aggie’s forearm to try to calm her. “Why don’t you wait until afterward. You don’t want to ruin Betty’s first book signing.”
Aggie knew Tom was right. She didn’t want to ruin Betty’s big day. Her friend was nervous enough. She’d wait until later to have a discussion with the two of them about changing the cover after the event.
There were five rows of folding chairs and Tom led Aggie to the last row. “Here,” he said, motioning for her to take a seat. “No one will even know it’s you. Trust me.”
“Oh my God!” Anita shrieked, standing in front of the poster. She picked up one of Betty’s books and pointed at the cover. “Aggie! Aggie! Did you know you were going to be on the cover? And with so little clothes on! My word! Who knew you had such shapely legs?”
The other people that’d been browsing the table, and those in nearby rows, not attending the book signing, but looking at other books, stopped to have a look at the woman on the cover and then a look at Aggie.
Aggie’s cheeks flushed as she forced a weak smile. “Kill me,” she muttered. “Kill me now.”
“It’s not that bad,” Tom consoled. “I kind of like it.”
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“It is that bad.”
Aggie buried her face in her hands hoping to disappear. Obviously, she knew closing her eyes wouldn’t help her any, but she still tried. She squeezed her eyes shut and wished to be at home in her PJs lounging on the sofa while reading a cozy mystery. But when she opened her eyes and lifted her head, she groaned. She was still sitting on an uncomfortable folding chair.
Tom was staring at her. “You okay?”
Aggie nodded. “I think so. Maybe.”
“Hello, everyone!” Roger announced, holding a microphone in one hand. He was standing in front of the table with stacks of Betty’s book on it. The bookstore quieted down and people quickly took their seats. He thanked everyone for being there. And also thanked, Melanie, the manager of the bookstore, for hosting the event.
Melanie, a heavy-set woman in her mid-thirties with shoulder-length brown hair, blue eyes, and glasses, took the microphone from Roger. She was wearing a light blue button-down shirt tucked into tan trousers. She wore a name tag with the store’s logo beneath her name.
“Hello! And thank you for joining us. I’m pleased to be introducing Betty Wilcox, the author of the popular blog, the Aggie Underhill Mysteries, which are now available as a book in both paperback and hardcover.” The audience clapped and Betty smiled brightly while batting her thick eyelashes.
Melanie spoke a little bit about the bookstore and wanting to help support local authors. She also introduced her event coordinator and buyer for the store, Chuck.
Chuck smiled and gave a little half-wave when he stepped out of an aisle of books to their left. He appeared to be out of breath and his cheeks were flushed. Aggie figured he’d been running late and had probably just arrived. She pegged him to be in his early thirties. He had reddish hair, a straggly beard, mustache, freckles across the bridge of his nose and a receding hairline.
Chuck wore square rimmed glasses and was also heavy set. He had on the same light blue button-down shirt as Melanie, with a pair of beige khaki pants, that was a shade lighter. Aggie surmised it was the dress code for the bookstore employees. She also noticed that Chuck wasn’t wearing a nametag. His shirt was wrinkled and slightly untucked on one side.
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