by Jenni James
“I am not a lady. Not even close.” She pulled the back of her skirt off a thorny bush and then turned and was surprised to find Adrian inches from her.
“If I had my way, I would make you a princess.” Those eyes of his bore into hers.
Slowly, she inhaled until she felt as though her lungs would burst. “Please do not say such things to me.”
His hand came up and released a strand of her hair from a long branch. “And why is that?”
“Because you make me hope for something that will never be.”
Adrian’s fingers paused right as he came to the tip of her hair. “Dearest, I do not think my heart can handle such a confession from you at the moment. I could not bear it if you were jesting.”
“Jesting?” All at once, each breath was forced.
He let her lock go. “I comprehend I am nothing more than a frightening specter and not worth the time it took for your heart to learn to beat for me.”
“Therefore, I must be jesting?” she asked, attempting to finish his sentence.
“Precisely.”
Adeline looked away from his earnest gaze, endeavoring to make sense of the swirling thoughts within her. How she would give anything to see this man stand before her alive and well. “We should not speak like this.”
Adrian coughed gently. “No, we should not. But before we break this small moment of tension and pretend as if this did not happen, may I kiss you?”
Her eyes met his. “I beg your pardon. What did you say?”
“May I kiss you, my dear?”
Never had she taken such shallow breaths before. Surely this lightheadedness was from lack of breathing properly and not from the way his blue eyes pleaded with hers. All her life, Adeline had envisioned kissing her husband in front of the altar. And many times, she had imagined what his lips would feel like against hers. But this—this was an experience she had never once dreamed of. To kiss a prince in the castle gardens. And to have it be Prince Adrian, of all things!
His face fell as he took a step back. “Forgive me. I have no doubt scared the wits out of you. I blame myself for being so forward and can only wonder at such manners.”
“Adrian?”
“Yes?”
“I—” She was not certain how to go about asking a prince to kiss her. “Would you come closer again?” Already she could feel her face begin to grow warm. “You misunderstood me. I was merely contemplating what it would be like to kiss you, not wishing you a thousand miles away.”
“Truly?” He grinned and hesitantly moved toward her.
“I am most curious at how your lips will feel. So far, every single part of you has felt decidedly real and alive.”
He looked down, and then those blue eyes met hers again. Yet this time, they were filled with something she could not quite place … sorrow? Sadness? Regret? “I should not take such liberties with you.”
“I will not be compromised by a mere kiss. A kiss no one else could see.” Goodness, how brazen she had become! Her cheeks grew even more warm.
Adrian lifted her chin with his finger and lowered his mouth to her brow first. “Please know, my dear, that this may be the single most difficult thing I have ever done.”
“To kiss me?” She was a bit confused by that remark.
“No. Yes. It is kissing you and then knowing I will not be the man who will forever kiss you, comfort you, hear your laughter, your ideals about life, and witness your outrageous pluck. I have tumbled quite helplessly in love with you, and I do not know how I will cope once you are gone.”
“You are a dream of mine,” she said. “You are a figment of my imagination, and any moment now, I shall awaken in the library and find myself once again waiting for the butler to return and realize this was all an outlandish reverie.”
He kissed her then. Warm, soft, perfect lips met hers until her knees went weak and her heart refused to beat the same again.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN:
Later that evening, long after they had returned to the home and long after dinner, Adeline and Mrs. Humphries were on the settee in the older woman’s rooms, having a nice tête-á-tête.
“And what did the prince say to you to create the charming rosiness I see upon your cheeks now?” the housekeeper asked.
Adeline grinned and shook her head as she took a sip of her tea. She debated confiding all that she and prince had spoken of. She longed to open up to someone and spill her confusions and thoughts so maybe they could tell her she had not lost her marbles altogether.
“Come now.” The older woman’s eyes sparkled. “You cannot get away without at least sharing the details of the kiss with me.”
Adeline nearly dropped her cup. “The kiss! However did you learn of it?”
“I should say it was in your eyes.” She chuckled. “But that would be very deceiving of me. Adrian told me all about it himself merely an hour ago.”
“Well! I dare say I do not know why I attempt to keep a thing to myself.” Adeline grinned and took another sip of the comforting liquid. “I am all astonishment that the prince would deem me worthy enough for a mention as it is.”
“Are you?” The older woman raised an eyebrow. “Careful, child. You will appear as if you are looking to be complimented.”
Adeline set her cup into its saucer and then chose to ignore the last quip. “I was kissed this afternoon by the lake. The charming rogue nearly broke my heart before he did so.”
The housekeeper spoke quietly. “I have never seen him more in love in all my life. It would seem you have completely bewitched him.”
“I do not see how. I am nothing of significance really.”
She tutted. “Tsk. ’Tis those compliments you are going fishing for again.”
“Forgive me. I do not mean to. I am truly lost as to how this has all come to be.”
Mrs. Humphries smiled a rueful grin and then leaned over and touched Adeline’s arm. “’Tis your soul he has fallen for, my dear. Your goodness and playfulness and frankness.”
“What am I to do?”
“Do you love him in return?”
Adeline took a deep breath, and when her hand began to shake, she quickly set the cup and saucer on the table. “I hardly know. I feel so much in his presence. There is most certainly an increased awareness and pull to keep him by me always, and yet I feel as though I am living someone else’s life. As if I am in a dream of some sorts. It cannot be real. This good, wonderful prince cannot be in love with me.”
“And what if he genuinely is?”
Adeline’s heart fell, and she could not keep her countenance. “I will surely suffer as unkindly as he. The notion that I could cause such a man to hurt is beyond my comprehension.”
“But he is not a man, though—not truly.”
Her head whipped up, and instantly, a flash of anger coursed through her. “Prince Adrian is as real—nay, he is more real than any young man I have ever known. When he holds me, his heart beats gently in my ear and he feels so warm, solid, and comforting. I cannot think of him otherwise. I would not dare to.”
The older woman shook her head. “Adeline, you cannot mean this. It is not right for you to feel this way. He is dead.”
“Halt, please.” Adeline closed her eyes. “Please let us talk of happier things. I feel as though I shall truly break at any moment.”
“Then you do love him!”
“One cannot fall in love as quickly as that.” She opened her eyes to find Mrs. Humphries openly smiling. “What is it? Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Then there is hope.”
“Hope? For what?” She tamped down a feeling of irritation. “That I will fall in love?”
“That you are.”
“And why would anyone wish any such thing to happen to either of us? Who would wish that sort of torture when we are destined never to be together?”
“Me, my dear.” Mrs. Humphries stood up in a flurry of activity. “Now, please excuse me while I talk to Adrian. I must find him
at once.”
Stunned, Adeline watched as the round woman hurried from the room, leaving the tea things strewn all about. She pondered the meaning of such actions as she slowly picked up the dishes and took them to the kitchen to be washed. “Whatever could she be hoping to speak to Adrian about?” she mumbled to herself. “Other than—oh, heavens. Please pray the woman was not hoping to reveal this ridiculous notion that we are both in love with the other.” Pray the housekeeper had enough sense not to do that!
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN:
The next morning, after many failed attempts to get Mrs. Humphries to reveal what was said to Prince Adrian, Adeline found herself in a new lilac gown and shooed away into the blue drawing room where a few of the guests were having an early tea. She did not see the young gentleman in the green waistcoat or her stepsisters, which gladdened her a bit as she slipped into the room and sat on a chair in the back.
It looked as though no one had spotted her, which suited Adeline just fine. She found a small book of poems on an end table near her elbow and quickly put her nose into the thing and attempted to ignore the gaily chattering group.
“Why are you here in the shadows and not in the middle of the fray?”
Fray? Fray. He would use such a word. Adeline primly set the book upon her lap and looked up at the ghostly prince. “What are you doing here in the shadows?” Her heart began to beat strangely in her chest, and her hands grew tense.
“Merely watching you, of course.”
She picked the book back up and whispered, “Is this something you do often?”
“Every moment I get.”
“Prince Adrian!” she hissed, most decidedly feeling a bit scandalized.
He smugly grinned. “Yes?”
That twinkle in his eye stopped any silliness he was attempting to provoke out of her. “Oh, never mind. I know you are not heathen enough to approach Mrs. Humphries’ rooms.”
He pretended to clear his throat and then shifted his feet. His eyes scanned out toward the other guests and he answered quietly, “You know me well. I would never consider that an option.”
She watched him a moment longer before realizing—why, he was embarrassed by the subject! “So, this is what it is like to see you so uncomfortable.”
He still did not meet her eyes. “Perhaps not as uncomfortable as I can become, but close enough.” He leaned against the wall and crossed a leg over the other, appearing—if anyone could see him—as if he had not a care in the world and was as contented as ever he could be.
She chuckled. “Careful. At first I had to wonder if you were avoiding meeting my eye because you had done just that—came into my rooms and watched me sleep.”
If the ghostly prince could have gotten any whiter, he would have at that moment. Adrian’s jaw dropped and he refused to meet her humorous gaze in his attempt to assure her he would never do such thing. “I vow that I would only approach you in your rooms if I was certain all was well and you were dressed and such.”
She could not let him off the hook that easily. “Oh, I am not so positive of that.” She turned a page of the book. “You were most obviously in my rooms those first few nights my stepsisters and I stayed here. ’Tis why I followed the sound to the library, so I could find you to begin with.”
Adrian’s face flushed an interesting shade of red. “Yes, but I was not . . . I did not mean to . . . it was not like that at all.”
Adeline could not help herself. She giggled. Right out loud.
A couple of gentlemen turned around in their seats to see where the sound came from. Adeline was surprised to see their shocked looks turn to smiles. And when one of them stood up as if to approach, she became so nervous that she stood up herself and nearly ran into Adrian.
“You know you cannot run from every gentleman who is interested in you,” he said matter-of-factly.
“Adrian, you only speak such things because you have never had to deal with the male species.” Clutching the book, she brushed past the prince, walked out into the corridor, and began to head toward the library as quickly as possible. Once there, she collapsed into the overstuffed chair in the corner and hid behind her small volume of verse.
“I truly have never seen a maiden move as quickly as you do,” Adrian said as he sat down on a matching chair next to hers. When she ignored him, he continued, “’Tis no use running away. That gentleman will find you soon enough.”
Adeline closed her eyes and groaned into the book. “Do not say such things.”
He chuckled and leaned back into the chair. “Very well. I will not mention your folly in escaping a guest party where all of the guests are staying in the same place.”
She lowered the book and gave him a rueful look. “I have no desire to meet anyone or to speak to anyone, let alone be courted by anyone.”
“Are you afraid, then?”
A flash of crossness flew through her. “We have been over this again and again—I am not like these women here. I wish more than anything that I was, but this is not my life. I am a servant first.”
“You are an heiress, my dear.” Adrian’s head tilted a moment and then he looked toward the door. With one hand out as if to tell her to halt speaking, he whispered, “Some of the guests are on their way to the library.” He stood up. “Follow me quickly.”
She tucked her hand into his and followed him through a side door she had not seen before. It led into a narrow hallway that was dimly lit. “Where are we?”
“The servants’ passageways. Now stay with me and I will take you somewhere no one will disturb us.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN:
Adeline’s heart raced as she followed Adrian through a maze of passages she had never known existed. “I bet you have had a lot of fun exploring these,” she said, matching his pace as he hovered in front of her. The walls were plain and narrow, but clean. It amused her that after all of his demands that she stay and mingle with guests, every opportunity he got to snatch her away from them, he did so.
“These passages were exceptionally entertaining.” He looked over his shoulder at her.
“One could get very lost.”
“Aye.” He chuckled. “I have seen more than one new maid in distress over the years, completely unsure of where to go. Unfortunately, none of them can hear me as you do. And truth be told, this is how I overheard the harsh words of your stepsisters that morning. The servant entrances are thin doors to help disguise them into looking as if they are part of the wall.”
“Miss Adeline!” One of the servants looked at her in surprise and curtsied as she passed her.
“Do not answer her,” Adrian advised. “She has more than likely already heard you talking to yourself. The more you speak, the more rumors will fly.”
Adeline nodded, squeezed past the young girl, and followed Adrian as if hurrying through passageways was a perfectly respectable thing for a guest of Lady Middlesong’s to do. Once out of earshot, she whispered, “How much farther is it?”
“Around the bend—we are almost there. It is a shame this castle is so very large. I prefer my family’s home in Germany. It is much smaller, more manageable, and much more like a home.”
Adeline could not imagine any castle becoming like a home for her. She needed nothing as grand as that.
“And here we are!” Adrian announced as he pushed open a small door and stepped into an enchanting ballroom. “No one will ever find us in here.”
It was as if she had wandered into a fairy tale of some sort. Gleaming marble floors, mirrors decorated the walls, and glittering crystal chandeliers hung regally several feet above their heads. “It is by far the most elegant room I have ever seen in my life.” She could imagine what it would look like bathed in candlelight and the tables adorned with fresh-cut flowers.
Adeline twirled once about the room in utter awe, taking it all in, which is precisely why she did not notice Adrian waiting for her in the center of the dance floor with hands open until she had nearly bumped into him.
“Oh! Forgive me. I was admiring the grandeur around us.”
“So I see.” He grinned a dashing grin and then asked, “My dear lady, would you have this dance with me?”
“What?” She gave a nervous giggle. “Now?”
He glanced around him. “Why not? We are in a ballroom, after all. ’Tis only right to dance with the most beautiful woman in the room.”
She held out the edge of her pretty lilac morning gown. “I suppose this will do. It is by far the most beautiful frock I have ever owned, but whatever will we do for music?”
Adrian leaned forward and captured her hand in his. “My dearest, if I were yours, you would own a thousand gowns, each one more exquisite than the last until you truly felt as though you were the princess you should be.”
“Ha!” Adeline shook her head and laughed, belying the silly speed of the fluttering in her chest. “I have no need for fancy gowns.”
She was not quite certain, but she thought she heard him quietly utter, “Oh, I hope you will.” When she was about to ask about it, he surprised her by speaking first.
“As to music, you need none. There is nothing I enjoy more than creating my own.”
“Your own?” Another giggle escaped. “Is it anything like the moaning that interrupted my sleep again and again?”
“You minx.” His eyes sparkled as he wrapped an arm around her waist and twisted her until they were side by side. “Now, hush so I can teach you the steps to my favorite German love song.”
“Love song?” Could her breathing become more rapid?
“Yes. Shh … Or you will miss the whole of the dancing, and that cannot be.”
The next twenty minutes or so were a blur to Adeline’s happy soul. Dipping, spinning, stepping in time to Adrian’s unexpected voice. How he could sing! Glorious, deep melodies in a language she did not know sent more than one shiver down her spine. It was as if she were in a trance, so beautiful and elegant and perfectly romantical were the expressions that played through her mind.
His blue eyes seared hers as he sang from the heart. She did not dare ask him to translate the song for her, for she did not want to ruin the moment. Besides, from the way he looked at her, she did not need to know the words. They spoke directly to her heart.