by Lotte Moore
“Oh Sergei, what are you saying?” Tears came as he hid his face on Sergei’s shoulder.
“It’s not possible any more. We must go on to new pastures. We’ve had a wonderful time together and learnt and given so much to each other, but I cannot share you.”
“But I… I want you in my life,” Theo said, wiping his wet face.
Sergei smiled sadly. “Me too, but we will just be going in circles. You will never leave your wife.”
After leaving the restaurant, they went off talking and walking along the cobbled streets until past midnight, but neither could see a way out for them to both have what they wanted.
“Come and meet Alex Petrov at the studio tomorrow morning,” Sergei suggested. They hugged warmly, and each walked off home in opposite directions.
*
Theo was nervous at the meeting Sergei had suddenly set up for him. He was devastated by the changes that Sergei seemed to find unavoidable. Why hadn’t their love resumed again?
A tall, bearded man with unruly red hair peered round the door. “Am I in the right place?” he asked.
“Come in, Alex. This is Theo, who we talked about. I wondered if you’d like to be at the recording next Monday?” asked Sergei.
“I’d love to. I saw you play in both Paris and Vienna, Theo. You have a unique gift,” Alex enthused.
“Thank you,” said Theo. He felt the man had a calm authority, which was the essence of good management.
“I’ll leave you both to chat for a while and perhaps we can have lunch in the square afterwards,” suggested Sergei.
As Alex and Theo spoke, Theo gradually relaxed and explained his ambitions for the future, including the fact that from now on he’d prefer to spend less time away from his family. He then expressed a desire for new challenges and new composers and maybe teaching some master classes for up and coming music scholars. Finally, he spoke in detail of his family in London, especially Vivi and their new son.
Alex conveyed warmth and sympathy while listening to Theo’s description of recent events. Sergei joined them for lunch and was saddened but knew it was the right thing when Theo accepted the inevitable ending of their passionate relationship, both personally and professionally.
*
On Monday, everyone arrived early in anticipation of the first day’s recording. Murel’s enthusiasm inspired Theo and the orchestra to perform brilliantly. The afternoon session was slower because various phrases needed re-recording.
By Thursday the Rachmaninov was completed and captivated all those in the studio, including Sergei and Alex. The Chopin sonatas would start the following day.
That evening, Theo suddenly panicked as Sergei walked home with him.
“It’s nearly over, how can I leave you, Sergei?” He grabbed the Russian’s shoulders and swung him round, kissing him passionately.
Sergei withdrew slowly. “Think of your future, your music, your family. You have to live for them now. Don’t break down and spoil it all, Maestro.” He stood frowning at the pavement before speaking again. “By the way, I’ll let you know when Baba’s place is sold. I’ve a friend who’s interested in buying it for her son.” Sergei stroked Theo’s face. “This is the end Maestro.”
*
Saturday was full of farewells during the orchestral lunch. Quite a few musicians were leaving to join other orchestras and Murel obviously felt sad losing part of his family and a great pianist and friend in Theo.
“I’m sure we’ll all meet up in London again one day,” he said hopefully.
Sergei had suggested that some of the musicians went back on the same flight as Theo. It would make his departure less painful and mean there was no opportunity to break down in tears.
Chapter Seventeen
Chiswick
Hours later, Theo arrived at Heathrow to be met by Vivi and the children waving madly at the exit with little homemade flags. They rushed at his weary body, hugging him. Theo looked down to see Sebastian’s eyes staring out of the baby-sling on Vivi’s chest. Emotion flooded up to his throat.
Georgie jumped up and flung her arms round his neck. “Oh Daddy, Daddy!” she cried, engulfing him with kisses.
Vivi saw a tear roll down his face. “You look exhausted.
Did the recording go well?”
“Yes,” he whispered. He searched her face, wanting to know if they were okay. She smiled at him and he knew he was forgiven. He kissed her softly, then ruffled Jago’s hair.
*
The next few days were very tense while Theo came to terms with his complete departure from Russia and from Sergei. He cried from time to time while practicing, but the children’s joy helped him to start thinking of new concerts. Meanwhile, all sorts of things—some familiar, others new—were pivoting round him.
His new manager, Alex Petrov phoned to suggest meeting the following week, as he’d be in London for a few days.
Jonty returned with Beady and helped her settle into the cottage and distribute some items of furniture to the family. The children started school again. Sebastian began to open his eyes more, and pay attention when Theo played the piano. It was a busy time—almost chaotic, but it allowed some level of distraction from the heartbreak he was feeling.
Chapter Eighteen
Oving
The lawyers of Lang’s old firm had replied very aggressively about the debt, stating categorically that they would accept no delay. This caused him great anxiety.
He was soon busy with school runs and introducing Benjie to his first day at nursery proved difficult. And Freddie wailed and clung, repeatedly asking why Mummy couldn’t take him to school.
“She will soon, when she is less busy,” explained Lang.
Having safely delivered all three children, he decided to pop in and see Jonty on the way back.
“Hello Lang, good to see you,” said his brother-in-law. “Let’s go down to the plantation.”
“Is Beady upset about leaving Madeira?” Lang asked on the way down.
“Yes, she was a bit sad, but she’ll be surrounded by family now and will love seeing all the grandchildren,” Jonty replied. “How are things with you?”
“I had another very aggressive warning from the firm’s lawyers yesterday. Jonty, do you think the money will come through this week?” Lang’s voice became agitated.
“I’m sure it will. I’ll give Beady’s people in Madeira a call later, but you can’t hurry them. I’m afraid they’re a law unto themselves.”
They walked round the woods for a good two hours, Jonty stopping now and then to admire the progress of the saplings and straightening some of the wire fencing.
“I do love this place. How I wish I could see it in fifty years’ time.”
They stood in silence for a while absorbing the air.
Lang glanced at his watch. “Oh, I must pick up the little one from nursery. He’ll be out at lunchtime. How time flies here! See you later, Jonty.” He hurried back to the car.
The playgroup was bubbling with children and mums noisily calling their offspring. Lang caught sight of Benjie sitting on a log holding the hand of a curly-haired girl. He went over.
“Hello Benjie, who’s your friend?” “Lucy,” he said. “She’s my girlfriend.”
“Oh your girlfriend,” Lang said, with his mouth twitching.
“She’s got silver shoes, Daddy. I’d like some like that.” The boy laughed and wrapped his arms around Lang’s knees.
Alicia and Freddie raced out of Oving Junior School, babbling non-stop as Lang talked to a couple of parents. On the way home, they stopped at the village shop for a homemade ice cream. Lang was relieved to see Freddie had enjoyed school almost as much as Alicia.
“Let’s see who can get their homework finished first,” he said after tea.
Suddenly the front door opened. There was Serena with an enormous bouquet.
“Oh Mummy! Look at those flowers,” exclaimed Alicia. Everyone gathered round.
“The Russians are very generous. They also g
ave me these boxes for you.” She handed out three wooden boxes with feathers painted on their sides. Inside there were sweets.
“Why are you back so early, darling?” asked Lang, pecking her on the cheek.
“They’ve got a business party at the house, so I was able to bunk off for once.” She laughed. “Now, who’s going to tell me first how school went?”
Chapter Nineteen
Chiswick
Theo lay in the garden hammock, thinking about everything that had changed and gone, wondering what Sergei was doing now, this very minute.
Vivi walked over and gently pushed the hammock. “You’re looking very solemn today, what’s up?” she asked. “Are you missing Russia again?”
“No, I’m just wondering about the future. When I’ll get my next job,” he said.
“Well, surely Sergei will organise it all as usual?” Vivi said casually.
“No, not now,” Theo said quietly. “I’m getting a new manager. Actually, he’s flying over next week for a chat. Is that alright?”
“Yes, of course, but what’s happened to the great Sergei who never left your side and you couldn’t do without? He was almost your mother, the way he cared for you,” Vivi said, rolling her eyes.
“It just wasn’t working. He was getting overbearing and booking me too much work in Russia.”
“Really? You thought that?”
“Yes,” Theo lied avoiding her eyes.
Tears suddenly filled Vivi’s eyes. Unable to trust herself she turned and walked back to the kitchen.
Theo sunk further into the hammock. Suddenly, he was swung upwards. Georgie laughingly pushed it again and Theo fell out.
“You can swing me now, Daddy,” she called, but Theo walked away. “Why are you cross?”
He ignored her and walked indoors. He leaned against the wall and breathed in deeply. His heart was hammering against his chest. His ache for Sergei wasn’t going away.
Chapter Twenty
Oving
During the next three days, Lang was in a terrible state, hoping Beady’s money would arrive. He snapped at the children and Serena. He didn’t eat and went for long walks alone. Twice he was late to pick up Alicia and Freddie. Finally, he exploded on Wednesday evening as Serena came off the phone.
“Can’t you bloody well ring up Beady? Do something! I’ve only got two days before the deadline,” he shouted.
Serena had never seen him in such a state. “Lang, calm down! I’ll ring them now.” She rang Jonty first and explained the panic.
“Oh yes, Mum said you should get a cheque tomorrow,” he said.
“Thank God. He’s really distraught. Will you have a word with him?” She handed the phone to Lang.
“Will it definitely be here tomorrow? They’ll serve the writ on Friday,” he said in a shaking voice.
“Don’t forget Mum is here in Chiswick now, you can always give her a call,” suggested Jonty.
Lang didn’t want to admit that he was still uncomfortable about what he had done especially around Beady, who he knew resented him for how hard Serena worked.
*
The next morning, Lang refused to take the children to school. He insisted on waiting for the postman. Frustrated, Serena had to alter her work schedule and take them herself, much to the delight of the kids.
Lang was pruning the climbing rose cascading round the front porch when he heard the post van rumbling up the drive. He almost fell off the ladder and ran towards the gate.
“Not much for you today,” said Fred, handing him two brown envelopes and a blue one.
Lang grabbed them. “Thanks!” While tearing open the blue envelope, he saw the cheque at last. “Good old Beady—she even remembered to make it out to the firm!”
He felt overwhelming relief as if being freed from his own sentence, and immediately phoned his lawyer to arrange a meeting. Having asked Maggie to pick up Benjie, he rushed off to catch a train.
An anxious Lang arrived at the lawyer’s office half an hour early.
“You look as though you need a drink,” said his lawyer. “Let’s go to the pub.”
Lang hadn’t been to the old familiar pub in a long time. Luckily, there were no colleagues around and after the second stiff gin and tonic, Lang was able to relax a little but couldn’t wait to get back to the country.
“Here’s the cheque.”
His lawyer checked it and smiled at Lang reassuringly. “It’s finally over.” And Lang felt like he could breathe again.
From the station at Aylesbury, he drove up to the top of a wooded hill and drank in a breathtaking view across the rolling countryside. A sense of security began to ease his panic. This was what he was part of now. Tranquillity seeped into him.
He glanced at his watch. “Goodness! They’ll be coming out of school in five minutes.”
Back home, Maggie greeted them all with strawberries and cream. The children were amazed to see Daddy so happy. He became immersed in the bonfire, he set up for the kids and homework was forgotten.
Two hours later, Serena arrived back to find three grimy faces peering out of the bath.
“What have you all been up to?” she asked, smiling.
“We made a huge bonfire and baked potatoes and toasted marshmallows,” squeaked Freddie.
“But we left one for you. It’s in the kitchen with a fork sticking out. They are delicious.” Alicia smiled, rubbing the smoke off her face.
Lang gave Serena a hug. “The cheque arrived, and I rushed it up to the lawyers and the debt is paid off, darling. We’re free at last! Thank you so much for your generosity and patience. I’ll always feel guilty for what I did and the effect it had on us—forgive me a little.”
Lang wrapped his arms round Serena and hugged her softly with warm love. The children were splashing each other riotously.
“Oh, I’m so glad it’s over darling.” She pulled away from him. “If you ever lie to me again Lang—”
“I won’t, I promise,” Lang said, kissing the tip of her nose.
Half an hour later the two boys were in bed. Alicia was practicing the piano, while Lang finally spoke to Beady, showing his gratitude for her generosity and his relief. It was all over, and he reassured her he would contribute to the family in every way possible. He handed the phone to Serena.
“Mum, the stress has gone at last, and I do appreciate what you’ve done. The dreadful cloud hanging over us has gone forever, I hope.” Serena listened for a minute, then suddenly smiled. “A party? What a nice idea. Will it be in your cottage? Oh, in Vivi’s lovely drawing room, what fun. Yes, we can all come on Sunday next week.”
Serena put the phone down. “Mum’s having a family do to celebrate her new home.”
“Now, let’s go out for a drink or even a meal by the canal,” suggested Lang.
“That’s a bit sudden, darling. Maggie might have prepared supper.”
“I don’t care even if she has. Tonight, you and I are going to celebrate,” stated Lang.
Chapter Twenty One
Chiswick
Theo opened the door to Alex Petrov.
“So sorry I’m half an hour late. The taxi took me to some place called Kew. What a beautiful home you have,” Alex said.
“Yes, the tide even laps our front door sometimes,” said Theo. “Will you have vodka or a coffee?”
They walked through the hall into the garden. After an hour, they’d both relaxed and started discussing possible future concerts. Alex had already fixed a date in Edinburgh.
Vivi arrived with a tray of snacks. Theo began to feel confident that he could progress under the guidance of a dedicated and enthusiastic manager, but it still felt alien to him that it wasn’t Sergei he was talking to.
Vivi asked about the plans and was relieved to hear there were no bookings in Russia at present. She also responded warmly to Alex Petrov and suggested he came over one day for lunch.
Later that evening, Vivi enthused over the new manager. “He’s charming and very ambiti
ous for you, isn’t he?”
“Yes, I’ll see how it works out after he’s booked some good concerts,” replied Theo.
“By the way, I wondered about having Sebastian christened the same day as Mum’s do. What do you think?” Vivi asked tenderly.
“Actually, yes. We’ll just make it one big family party at lunchtime, Beady won’t mind, will she?” asked Theo.
“I’m sure she won’t.”
“Oh, and the other thing we need to talk about is godparents. We’ve only got Cheryl so far. I’d like to have Mark Cooper, that clarinettist I used to work with. Do you remember? He’s a lovely person,” Theo said.
“Yes, I liked him. And I think Lang would be a lovely godfather too. He’s great with the kids, isn’t he?” replied Vivi.
“I’ll ring them up now.”
Chapter Twenty Two
Wiltshire
Three tapestry curtains had just been fitted around the large four poster bed in Oleg Paranovsky’s master bedroom. He was pleased to see the work progressing, but Serena stood back and looked at them, then sighed.
“The colour just doesn’t work, I’ll have to find an alternative. Take that lot off,” she said, realising that this job was proving much more difficult than any other.
She sent her assistants home early and then decided to take a long stroll in the gardens.
“Goodness, I’m losing my touch. It’s all getting out of hand,” she said to herself. “What with the stress of Lang’s debt, not seeing the children enough and taking on this enormous challenge, I’m feeling I can’t cope.”
Just then Serena came to the top of a rise. Below her an avenue of beech trees had begun to turn golden and brilliant red as the sun filtered through their leaves. To the left, a copse of ash and hornbeam nestled at the bottom of a hill near several gnarled oaks which stood beyond a flourishing orchard, bursting with russet apples like the baubles on a Christmas tree.
There were so many autumnal colours melding into each other it was almost like a tapestry in itself.