by T. Styles
Just the thought of her pretending to be his mother made me hot. “I can’t take care of him—”
“So you gonna be a deadbeat?” he interrupted. “Like your whore ass mother was before she died?”
“I would get Cassius if I could—”
“Do you want your son back or not?” he asked strongly.
“I…’cause….”
“Madjesty, do you want him back? Because if you do I can take you to go get him tonight and there would be nothing nobody could do to stop me…to stop us.”
“Pops, it’s not that simple. I mean, where we gonna go if I get him? Here?”
“No. You, me and my grandson could go to Texas and start all over. Antoinette has some property down there and she knows I want my family together.” He grabbed my hand. “Come with me, Mad and let’s go get your son. Because I’m going to tell you what I know to be truth, she cannot be trusted.”
My heart thumped inside of my chest. I wanted my son, I know I did, but what if I couldn’t take care of him? What if he doesn’t recognize me? What if he cries when I hold him? What if Jayden doesn’t let me have him? What if I’m a bad mother, like my mother? What if I…what if…I…beat my child too, like my mother beat me?
“You a good person, Madjesty,” my father said to me as if he could hear my thoughts. “You nothing like your father, or mother, and you will never abuse Cassius. I know it. You’re better than me, and your mother.” He looked sad. “Let’s go get him.”
“I can’t go with you, Pops. Not right now anyway.”
He exhaled hard. Like he had been holding his breath for a while.
Trying to change the subject I said, “How did you know I was here anyway?”
“I found a piece of paper in the car the other day that dropped out of Antoinette’s purse while she was cleaning it. It had your name on it, with this location. I’m not going to lie, I was going to kill her when I found out she knew where you were and didn’t tell me, because she knows how hard I been looking for you. I let it go because at least you are still alive.” He paused again. “Look, if you not coming with me how long are you going to stay here?”
“Not too much longer.” I looked around. “I got myself into some shit that’s making it hard to stay.”
“Well how can I get in contact with you if you’re here? I’m talking about phone calls.”
I gave him Father Brian’s information at the soup kitchen. He didn’t write anything down but I know he held the information tightly it in his memory.
“I don’t know if I ever told you this before,” he said to me, “but I…I…lo…love you,” he stuttered.
My eyes widened. “You love me?”
“Yes, you’re my son, Madjesty. And I hate that you gotta do whatever you gotta do here. But I also understand that this is your journey. Not mine. I didn’t start growing up until I found out you were actually my kid. But you need to also know that you’re not like the rest of these mothafuckas here. You’re loved, kiddo. I might not be the best father, but I’m still your father. We all we got.”
“I understand,” I said trying to hold back my own tears.
He took off my cap and wrestled up my hair before slapping my cap back on. The moment I pushed my hat over my eyes, Wicked walked into The Pit. “They said it was true but I was like naw, she’s not crazy enough to have an outsider in The Catacombs. When she knows the rules,” Wicked said. “I guess I’m wrong.”
“I know the rules but this my father. Don’t worry he’s about bounce in a minute anyway.”
“I don’t give a fuck about what he’s going to do in the future,” he said as if my pops wasn’t standing there. “You know the rules and the rules are no outsiders unless it’s put to a vote. Was there a vote that I didn’t know about? Because I’m confused.”
I know my father is vicious but I didn’t know he was quick too. Because before I could say anything, he grabbed Wicked by the neck and choked him.
CHAPTER 27
MAD
My armpits were dripping in sweat. I didn’t see this shit coming. I was standing in front of Old Man Young, The Parable and one other elder as they prepared to judge my fate. To Old Man Young’s right was Wicked and he wore a huge grin on his face. After all the shit he’d done he finally got what he wanted. The possibility of me being thrown out.
Behind me were my friends, Spirit, WB and Gage. I knew this wouldn’t end well so I was glad they were there.
“Mad, you are being brought here because of what happened yesterday in The Pit. Do you understand?”
Yesterday when my pops choked Wicked out, me, Spirit and Gage was able to pull Wicked into his cubby without being seen by anybody else. To make it seem that Wicked was drunk and that my father hadn’t done anything to him, we put the last of my Hennessey in his hand and splashed it all over his clothes. We did all we could to set up the scene. It was a dumb idea and our plan failed.
First it looked good because Wicked didn’t wake up any that night. I was alone in my cubby talking to Pickles hoping that shit would be okay. But in the morning Spirit walked in with Gage and they had serious expressions on their faces. I knew what was up. Wicked not only remembered but he also snitched. I was mad at myself for not letting my father kill him and dump his body out back. Instead I spared his life and this is how he repaid me.
It took everything in my power to convince my pops to leave The Catacombs. He didn’t go until I promised him that I was going to be okay.
“I understand that this is some bullshit,” I said to Old Man Young. “Everybody here knows that Wicked was fucking with me and he finally got what he deserved. Choked out.”
Spirit put his hand on my shoulder and whispered, “Mad, please don’t give them all of that. We don’t want you to leave.”
“I don’t give a fuck,” I told him. I focused back on Old Man Young and the others. “I have eaten this mothafuckas shit for too long, and he got what he was due. He tried to kill me several times and he even tried to take out my little man.” I looked over at Pickles who was with Fortune. “I’m glad the shit happened and I should’ve let him kill him.”
“So you’re saying that you aren’t apologetic?” Old Man Young said.
“I’m saying fuck this nigga,” I said looking into his eyes. “And I’m saying fuck everybody else who has a problem with it.”
Old Man Young sighed. “Well, I guess I’ll have to talk it over with the elders. We will have a decision late tomorrow. And whatever we decide will be final.”
“Whatever,” I said walking away. Spirit and them tried to follow me but I stopped them. “Ya’ll go back, I want to be left alone.”
“Are you sure?” Spirit asked.
“Did I stutter?”
When they walked away I was almost to my cubby when I felt someone following me. When I turned around I was staring into Wicked’s eyes. I bet if his man Pop Kill didn’t get arrested for fucking some chick in a car up top, he would’ve been with him trying to annoy me.
“If you knew what I had in my hand right now, you wouldn’t be walking up on me,” I told him.
He stepped back, looked at the knife and smirked. “Don’t worry, I’m here for one reason and one reason only.”
“And what’s that?”
“To let you know that I provoked your father. I knew he would do exactly what he did and now you’re finally out. Good luck staying out of jail up top. Because I have a feeling that your days are numbered.”
****
I don’t know what made me go to Concord Manor but I was there. My heart sped up in my chest when I got off of the bus and walked on the block leading to the house. I guess I was nervous because I realized that I use to live here and it brought up bad memories.
When I made it to the house I walked around back. I saw a black Rolls Royce sitting out front and I wondered who it belonged to. The grounds look kept and the outside looked better than it did when my mother was alive. I guess Jayden is doing better than I thought.
He was so handsome. His hair was long, wild and curly just like mine. I wiped the tear away that fell down my cheek and exhaled. I wanted to hold him so badly my stomach ached.
Cassius pushed the toy lawnmower in the yard as if nothing was wrong in the world. As if everything was right, despite his mother, me, not being in his life. I wanted to tell him that I was sorry for not being around but since he's only two-years-old would he be able to understand?
I was just about to make a move and go talk to him when the backdoor opened. My sister, my twin, walked out holding a large red ball. Jayden looked more beautiful than the last time I saw her and my heart leapt. I could tell without even speaking to her that she was doing well. It was because of her long black hair that flowed and the diamonds that hung from her neck and ears. I wondered what she was doing to make her money because it was obvious that she had a lot of it.
The next thing I heard broke my heart. It shattered it in a way that can't be explained unless you had a child who didn't know you. "Mommy," he said looking at her with wide eyes. “Ball!”
I felt my skin heat up and my scalp tightened. Cassius called her mommy. Not auntie or Jayden but mommy. I don't know what made me angrier. The fact that he could look at her and call her the title that was rightfully mine. Or, the fact that she allowed him too.
I hate that bitch. More than anybody I ever hated and that includes my mother. How could she do this to me? My own flesh and blood? My twin sister! I swear if I had a gun I would've shot her dead. Better yet if I had a knife I would've stabbed her with my bare hands so that she could feel my hate.
I should've never come here. I should've never allowed myself to feel this kind of pain. I know I’m not a good mother now because a good mother could never hate so much. Maybe part of me wanted him to be sad without me.
I turned around to leave.
****
I stood before Old Man Young, The parable and the elders as I waited for the judgment. I couldn’t believe I was going through all of this. They should be begging somebody to live in this funky mothafucka, instead of throwing them out. Yet here I was, homeless, and begging them to give me a few more weeks in this hellhole.
"Mad, we have given a lot of consideration to this matter," Old Man Young said. "And we realize that you have done a lot for many people here in The Catacombs. But, violence of any kind is not acceptable. You were irresponsible when you allowed your father to hurt another resident here, and for that we must hold you accountable."
I swallowed the knot in my throat. I knew what was about to go down before they even said it.
"With that said, we are exiling you from The Catacombs,” Old Man Young continued. “If you refuse to go we will make life for you here difficult."
Exiling? What did that mean? Why couldn't they just tell me what the deal was using regular words? What was wrong with English?
Spirit must've sensed my confusion because he whispered in my ear, "It means you'll have to leave The Catacombs, Mad." I turned around to look at him, still a little confused. He touched my shoulder. “Them old mothafuckas putting you out.”
I turned back around and faced Old Man Young and the others. They didn't know who they were fucking with. I saw where being nice got me. Nowhere. I hate this mothafucka! I hate everybody.
"So it's cool for Wicked to try to fuck my little man and lock him up in a gage. But the moment my father knocks him out it's a problem? Are you serious?"
"It's not about Wicked," Old Man Young said. "It's about the fact that you allowed an outsider into our home and in turn he hurt another member. We would've exacted the same punishment on Wicked had it been the other way around. But it wasn't. At the end of the day someone you know came into our place and hurt another."
“You just doing this because you want me to leave,” I yelled at Old Man Young. “You been saying for the longest that you want me gone and now you got your wish. This shit was a set up. Even Wicked said he provoked my pops.
“It doesn’t matter,” Old Man Young responded. “It is time for you to leave.”
I bit my inner lip. I bit down so hard I could taste my own blood. I decided not to kiss their asses anymore. If they wanted me gone then fuck it, I was going to leave. But it wouldn't be without a fight.
"When I gotta go?"
"You have one week."
I rubbed my hands together and looked at Wicked. "That's all the time I need."
CHAPTER 28
DAZE
A few days later, after Old Man Young and the elders had given Mad the verdict, Wicked, Pop Kill, Daze and Killer went into Wicked’s cubby. Pop Kill was home after his short jail stint and eager to get into trouble. After the verdict they still acted as if they hit the lottery because after all of their planning, they finally got what they wanted, Mad evicted from The Catacombs.
“Do you remember seeing that bitch’s face?” Wicked asked walking into his room. “I can’t believe this shit.”
“Yeah, she looked pretty fucked up,” Daze said. “You better watch out though, man, I don’t trust her.”
“Why are you always worried about what somebody might do?” Wicked asked rubbing his baldhead. “She is out of here and that’s all I care about.”
“Yeah, baby,” Killer said kissing Daze’s lips. “What she gonna do to us now?”
“Besides,” Wicked said patting him on the back. “I got something for you all as a token of my appreciation.”
“Appreciation for what?” Pop Kill said. “I didn’t even get a chance to have some fun. One minute I’m here and the next minute she’s about to be out of here.”
“This is for having my back,” Wicked responded.
He handed them each a small baggie of heroin. “I got this out of Spirit’s room. I followed him up top and caught him copping from his regular dealer. That Bitch Mad was with them.”
Daze, Pop Kill and Killer’s eyes widened. Immediately they started to salivate as they sat on Wicked’s bed and opened the packets. In no time they cooked the dope, and loaded their needles. Wicked was supposed to save his pack to share with a female he was meeting later but he couldn’t hold on any longer after seeing them cook.
"So what do you think will happen to Mad now that she gotta go?" Pop Kill asked Wicked as he tapped his vein.
"What do you think?" he responded cooking his hit. "If shit goes the way I know it will she'll be thrown out on the streets and before long thrown in jail.”
Pop Kill grinned. "I would have rather have killed the slut with my bare hands instead of kicking her out. But to each his own."
"Well maybe we can hunt her down outside of The Catacombs and then you’ll get your chance."
“Now you’re talking,” Pop Killed responded slyly.
Daze and Killer were too busy stuffing their veins to even listen to what Pop Kill or Wicked was talking about. Wicked tied Pop Kill off and Pop Kill pressed the dope into the vein. Wicked tapped his vein to inject himself. He was about to insert the needle until Pop Kill’s eyes flew open.
"What's wrong, nigga?” Wicked asked.
“I think we got a bad—”
Pop Kill’s sentence was cut off when he felt a lightning bolt type pain shoot through his arm. When his body started experiencing sharp pains he knew what was happening. He had received a hot shot.
The moment he fell down, Killer cried out as well as Daze.
“What’s going on?” Wicked yelled looking at his friend’s lying on the floor convulsing. “What the fuck is going on?”
They couldn’t answer him but Mad, who was on the outside of his cubby knew exactly what happened. She got revenge on three of her enemies and there was only one more
to go.
CHAPTER 29
WICKED
Wicked was sitting on his bed, rolling up a blunt laced with crack cocaine. Since Pop Kill, Daze and Killer were gone, he was alone. He still couldn’t believe that they were dead. Daze and Killer had been by his side since he first made it to The Catacombs. Pop Kill came into the picture later but he still had a close bond with him. And to learn that they all died from a heroin overdose fucked him up.
He thought about how the dope was left out in the open in Spirit’s room. They knew he would steal it. He couldn’t bring it up because he wasn’t supposed to be in Spirit’s room.
He couldn't sleep ever since he and a few other West Wingers buried them in the graveyard by The Pit.
He was just about to smoke when the lights to The Catacombs went out.
He popped up from the bed. “What the fuck is going on?” he yelled out into the dark tunnel. “Why the lights go out?”
Nobody said a word and he was petrified. Hoping they’d take care of what needed to be done to get the lights back on, he decided to sit back down and finish his weed. That was until he sensed somebody behind him. Before he could move a cold knife was placed against his throat.
"I warned you didn't I?" Mad said before slicing into the flesh on his cheekbone. "But you didn't listen. Why didn't you listen?"
With the lights out Wicked felt helpless. Was she alone? Would she kill him?
"Please don't do this," Wicked begged. He wasn’t acting like the arrogant bastard he usually was. "I mean...I didn’t want to get you put out but you was trying to tear my family apart. Don't you realize how much I love them? They the only things I have in this world and they abandoned me all for you."
"Your family?" she laughed, before cutting into the first layer of the skin on his neck. “You don't give a fuck about anybody but yourself. What the fuck you know about family?"