by Kathryn Moon
“But Jonah—“ Bullet started, turning to Ryan. My alpha—my official alpha—was leaning against the counter, sipping coffee out of a china teacup, one eyebrow raised as the other three men stared between us.
“One,” I snapped, stepping between Bullet and Ryan and raising finger. I shot a look at Tornado who was at the stove, skillet sizzling and a fork in his lifted hand. “Do not burn that bacon, I am starving. Two. Am I or am I not going to be a part of this pack?”
“Of course you are!”
“Fuckin’ obviously!”
“Love, how can you ask that?”
“Then three: whose decision is it when and with whom I bond?” I asked, arms crossing over my chest.
“Yours,” Tornado said immediately, earning himself a smile.
“I mean, yeah,” Bullet hedged, brow furrowing.
“You don’t sound certain of that, handsome, and I have concerns,” I said, jutting my chin out and leveling him a narrow-eyed look.
Bullet swallowed, eyes flicking between my challenging stare and my bottom lip. He ended up looking over my head back to Ryan. “You gonna make her defend herself to Scorch when he inevitably feels butthurt at not getting final say and first dibs?”
“Hey! I am perfectly capable of—“
“No, I’ll deal with him,” Ryan said.
I whipped around to glare at him, and he answered me with a stare over the rim of his teacup and a reassuring stroke through the bond.
“Well, fine then,” Bullet said before huffing and settling himself back in his chair. “Guess I’m just kinda jealous now.”
I laughed and climbed into his lap, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “You know you’ll get your own turn when you’re ready.”
Bullet purred, hands cupping around my waist. He leaned back against the table, elbows propped on the surface. “Would you understand if I wanted to wait for Scorch’s blessing?” I frowned, and he squeezed me gently. “Not because I don’t think you deserve to make your own decisions on this, but because I will feel ready when I know that the act won’t cause any tension for anyone.”
I sighed and softened in Bullet’s hold. I’d seen Ryan challenge Jonah before, and it was clear the two cooperated because they were equally strong wills working in tandem. Big, scary, darling Bullet was every bit as strong as any of the alphas in the pack, but his flexibility and open heart were what I needed from him, and if that meant we waited longer to bond, I could understand. It was a better reason than not trusting my decision.
Bullet purred as I leaned in to kiss him until the scent of bacon was too strong on the air and my stomach growled. Bullet laughed and then lifted me up to the table as Tornado and Mackenzie brought hefty plates of food over. I slid down into a seat between Ryan and Bullet and leaned across to the other two alphas.
“I hope you know you’re part of this decision for me too. There aren’t any other alphas who could’ve made this experience feel so natural, let alone make sure I loved every minute of it.”
I smiled as Mackenzie’s chest swelled with pride, his hand reaching for mine across the table.
“You’re sure?” Tornado whispered, eyes wide.
I stretched my other hand to him, and he grabbed it like a lifeline. “I’m positive.”
“There’s no rush,” Mackenzie said to him, and Tornado nodded unevenly. “It will happen when it happens.”
“Damnit, Coal is gonna be intolerable when he finds out he’s gettin’ bonded,” Bullet said in a sudden, humored rush.
Except I didn’t laugh, and Ryan let out an immediate snarl that he failed to stifle.
“Right. So…about that,” I said, grabbing a slice of bacon to tide me over through the next serious conversation.
I was nearly napping on Bullet’s chest as my alphas heckled Peter Fonda in The Wild Angels that night in front of the big movie screen.
“Look at that fuckin’ hair,” Bullet rumbled under my ear.
“That’s his helmet not his hair,” Tornado muttered.
On the other side of the house, the front door banged open. I twitched and froze on my alpha pillow, and Ryan growled.
“Where the fuck is everybody?”
Mackenzie sighed and pushed up from the giant couch. “I’ll go… deal with him.”
I groaned and rolled into the warm spot he’d just vacated before wobbling up into standing. “Hang on. I’ll come too.”
“Baby…” Ryan was antsy and angry and full of worry. Bullet and Tornado too, judging by their stormy expressions. I offered them a thin smile and escaped reaching arms, heading to join Mackenzie by the door.
“I don’t want to be dancing around this,” I said to them. “Just gonna deal with it head-on and go from there.”
Ryan weighed my words, staring at me, for a long beat before standing. “Then I’m coming with you.”
Bullet grunted. “We all are, let’s be real.”
“I want to handle it myself,” I warned, and waited for them to nod. “Okay, then.”
Cole hollered the house down again as we left the movie running and headed down the hall together. When we made it to the front hall, Cole’s bag was dropped carelessly to the floor, and he was holding an ornate vase in his hands with a calculating look.
“That’s worth more than your bike probably, so be careful,” Bullet said. There was a barely concealed snarl in his voice, and I nudged his side with my elbow, lifting my eyebrows. He shrugged and cleared his throat.
“There’s my sweet little omega,” Cole said, eyes on me as he put the vase back on its side table. His arms spread wide. “Well? Get over here and give me a kiss.”
Ryan was thrumming wildly in the bond with a feral energy that he barely hid physically. I brushed my fingers down the inside of his arm, hoping to settle him enough that I could look at Cole without seeing red.
“What’s with you guys?” Cole asked. “The heat do some kinda number on you? Can’t believe I fuckin’ missed the best part.”
“The best part of Baby is Baby,” Mackenzie said in a sudden burst of temper.
Omigod. How cute and how ridiculous are these guys?
Cole’s eyebrows shot up high and his eyes narrowed slightly, studying Mackenzie.
“Sorry for the lackluster welcome,” I said, trying to force myself through the declaration. Just get it over with, Baby. Maybe Cole would even be offended enough to leave.
“Well then, let’s sweeten it, little omega,” Cole purred, striding forward.
“I don’t like being called that,” I snapped, Ryan’s temper getting the best of me. Cole’s feet paused and his eyes narrowed again. Despite the long drive up north, this alpha looked every bit as glossy and handsome as the men in the movie we’d just been watching. Except, I just wasn’t attracted to him anymore. I cleared my throat and squared my shoulders. “I know that you and I… that we were um, exploring a possible connection while I was at the Plaza,” I said.
Cole’s smile was sharp. “If you want to call it that, sure.”
“I think that it probably had more to do with the heat and hormones than you and I,” I said. “I’m sure you have expectations since I asked for you to be here, but I’m not… those aren’t…”
“Going to happen,” Cole said, words flat and voice cold, rolling back on his heels.
“Yeah,” I breathed, nodding.
Confrontation was officially not my jam in this kind of situation. I wasn’t mad at Cole, I just didn’t want him pestering me for sex and knotting and bonding. Not when I wasn’t even sure I liked him, let alone felt as close to him as I did with the others.
“Got it,” he said, straightening and relaxing.
I paused, surprised by the acceptance. “Yeah?”
He laughed, and his smile was shiny and easy going again. “Yeah, Baby. I mean, I dunno if I’m giving up, but I get what you’re saying. Heat’s over and you don’t know if we’re more than a fling.”
“I…” Fling wasn’t exactly the word I would use but, “Ye
ah. Kinda.”
“Cool,” Cole said with a casual shrug. “I got time to win you over.”
My bond with Ryan radiated with suspicion, but we seemed to be on the same page. Relief that Cole appeared to be backing off.
“Well, okay,” I said slowly. “Um, so, welcome then.”
“Right, so what the fuck is this place?” Cole asked, spinning, his boots squeaking and scuffing on the tile. “I mean this is… we’re not like, renting it right?”
Bullet laughed, and the others relaxed. Ryan’s arms circled my waist and drew me back to his chest, worry stifled away as Bullet explained about his secret inheritance.
That was easy enough.
“Still not leavin’ you with him,” Ryan whispered for only me to hear. I shrugged in agreement. My mind wasn’t changed on Cole just because he’d backed off for the moment, and Ryan’s protectiveness suited me just fine.
35
Baby
“Kitten, I’m never gonna let you pull that trigger if you keep your shoulders up around your ears,” Bullet said at my back.
Damnit, he was right. I was super tense. I took in a deep breath and released it slowly, breath fogged in the crisp air of easing winter. We were in the woods on the ‘estate,’ as Bullet called his mansion in that odd shift in his voice when he got a little comfortable being home again. I rolled my neck, flicking the safety back in place on my gun, and lowered it to my side, trying to shake out some of the tension in my shoulders.
“What’s got you knotted up?” he asked, hands settling on my shoulders, thumbs digging through layers of sweater and coat.
“I dunno.”
“Old black-hearted Coal?”
“Ehnnn…” Cole had been picking at Mackenzie through breakfast and was definitely wearing out his welcome with us in my mind, but I hadn’t been thinking of him.
“Scorch?”
I sighed and shook my head. “No, not gonna worry about that until he’s back.”
“Good. So what’s going on?”
“I think I’m just… missing the others?”
“Green can manage without you for an hour,” Bullet teased.
I laughed. My peaceful alpha and I had been a little inseparable since the bonding. “No, I mean Roger and Chef and Dusty. The girls. I even miss the locals at the bar.”
Bullet was quiet for a beat. “Kitten… Baby.” I turned to face him, startled by the tear in his voice. His hands framed my face, and his head bent, lips grazing over mine once before pressing in deeper. I hummed into the kiss, and Bullet purred. “You could not be a single bit better for us,” Bullet murmured. “I’m never gonna get over how perfect you are.”
I blushed and blinked in surprise as he nuzzled one cheek, then the other. “Is it so strange to miss all the members of a pack?”
“No, but it is to miss their unbonded beta girlfriends,” Bullet answered, grinning. “My mom was bonded to three of her five pack mates, but she still kept a tight leash on the other two.”
My nose wrinkled. “I just don’t get that.”
“I know you don’t, kitten. The guys, and hell, the sweet but—“ he stuttered at my glare, “—the girls, love you for it too. I love you for it and a lot of other shit.”
I squealed and jumped, and Bullet deftly caught the gun in my hand and tucked it away before holding me to his chest, purr rumbling. “I love you too, handsome. For every bit of you. Quincy and Bullet and my big, naughty alpha.”
We stayed wrapped up in each other for several minutes, kissing and scent marking and cuddling until Bullet set me back on my feet. “We’ll get back home soon. Scorch says there’s gonna be a pack meet to talk shit over, and then on the other end he’s got Books doing his cyber shit, digging up whatever he can find on them, in case the truce isn’t an option.”
“See, that’s just it! I hate being here and you know, all helpless damsel while everyone else is doing something. Or being in the line of fire for me.”
“Making sure you are safe and that no one is gonna threaten your place with us is taking care of everyone. Remember, you are part of us now. If anything happened to you…” Bullet turned gray, even in the cold snap of the winter breeze around us. “It can’t, Baby. It’d mess us all up worse than we could stand through.”
I released a shaky sigh, and Bullet frowned. “Sorry. Not trying to scare you.”
“I know,” I said, nodding. “You’re right. But if there’s ever anything I can do, I want you to tell me.”
Bullet straightened and returned to his position at my back, spinning me to face the targets he’d set up through the trees. “You got it. For now, all I need for you to do is shake off the worries, take a deep breath, and squeeze the trigger as you let it out. Oh, and aim, yeah?”
I rolled my shoulders out, concentrating on keeping myself loose and relaxed, even as Bullet lifted my arms and tucked the handgun back into my grip. I took a deep breath, lifting it in front of me so I could stare through the guide down the barrel. I released the breath, slow and steady, and squeezed the trigger, absorbing the shock and kick of the gun in my hand. One by one, I shot for each target until my palms were numb and my fingers ached.
The cartridge was empty, but I clicked on the safety all the same and followed Bullet in to check the targets. I frowned, nose wrinkling as we got closer. I might’ve been privately hoping to miraculously hit center every time. Bullet hummed and counted the holes on the paper targets. When he turned to me, his eyes were bright and his smile was broad.
“This is good, kitten!”
“They’re all wobbly.”
Bullet belly laughed. “Well, yeah. You’re a beginner. But look, you got the paper on each shot. We know where all your shots went. It’s a good start. Let’s go back, and I’ll work on your stance with you.”
I reached for his hand as we turned around and instead he passed me a new cartridge. I snorted and shook my head, focusing on my gun. Bullet snuck a kiss to the top of my head, and I smiled at the ground.
“Mmf nuftshug fiisis fukkin,” Tornado mumbled around the spoon in his mouth, eyes blinking rapidly and forehead furrowed as he diced onions.
“Sorry, what was that?” I asked, grinning and sitting on top of the long kitchen table, peeling garlic cloves for our chicken dinner.
There were two dining rooms that I’d found in the house so far, but even the smaller of the two felt too formal for our little family dinners. For the most part, we ate where we cooked, sometimes even standing up if no one felt like setting the table.
Tornado cocked an eyebrow and glared at me until I reached and took the spoon from between his teeth. “That wasn’t working,” he said, as a tear rolled down his cheek from the onion fumes.
I shrugged. “It looked cute though.”
Tornado studied me with suspicion for a moment before turning and sliding his onions into the stockpot to sizzle. He set the cutting board and knife aside on the counter before stepping back to me, pulling the clove of garlic out of my fingers and tossing it aside on the table. He plucked the paring knife out of my hand and tossed it in the air. My eyes grew wide as it flipped mid-air and was then caught again in his grip.
“Was that cute?” he purred.
“No, that was fuckin’ sexy,” I said, grinning at him and combing dark strands of hair off his face. “You want me to go stand against the wall, and we can practice your circus act?”
Tornado huffed, eyes slipping shut and head shaking in a soft twitch, probably wondering if I was joking or crazy. His hands slipped between my knees and pushed them apart so he could step in closer, hands sliding across the table to pin me in. The more time Tornado and I spent together, especially here in the quiet of the mansion, the more playful he became. Since Mackenzie had been absorbed with work on his laptop it was nice to get to have the one-on-one time with Tornado, both in and out of the bedroom.
“I like all your pieces put together just as they are, love. No knife tricks for fun, please,” he murmured.
�
�Deal.” I hummed happily, leaning into him and setting my lips against his, catching his eye and waiting for him to press into the kiss. He did, but only briefly before pulling back.
“How is the bond?” he asked.
I blinked. “With Ryan?” Which, of course, I hadn’t gotten any others yet. “It’s…wonderful,” I said. Just thinking of the bond was like sending up a short flare, feeling Ryan calling back, his presence like a kiss on my soul before he drifted back to his rose hobby in the greenhouse.
“What about… like at lunch when he snapped at Coal over the perfume comment?”
Mackenzie had been teasing me at lunch, fingers playing along the hem of my skirt until apparently, the others had gotten a whiff of my interest. Ryan hadn’t taken it well when Cole made the joke. It might not have been such a big deal if it weren’t for the fact that realizing Cole’d been privy to my moment with Mackenzie made my stomach turn faintly.
“You mean like what’s it like when he’s angry? Umm… I dunno. I know where the feeling is coming from. I feel it, but it doesn’t, like, control my own reaction.”
Tornado frowned and started to lean away, and I realized what his question was really about. I hooked my legs behind his hips and pulled him back to me with a slow encouragement.
“You’re worried about me bonding you?” I asked softly.
“Green is… calm and patient,” Tornado started.
“Ryan portrays calm and patience,” I corrected. “He’s got a lot going on. And listen, I’m not going to make light of this and say I know I can handle it when you’re the only one who really knows what I’ll experience with you in the bond. I will say, however, that the connection is a two-way street.”
“If one of my episodes hits you without you realizing, you may not be able to help me, love,” Tornado murmured.
“Maybe, maybe not,” I agreed. “Mackenzie will though, right? And we don’t know yet that I won’t help.
“I’m supposed to be the alpha. You shouldn’t be responsible for—“
“Don’t say that,” I said, fisting my hands in his t-shirt and squeezing my thighs around his hips. We were nose to nose, both of us holding still, trying not to spook the other. Tornado’s dark eyes were gleaming, and all I wanted was to twine myself around him and not let go. I wished I had the bond with him now, just so I could share my confidence with him. “I am not the omega who needs an alpha to tuck her away and hide her from every uncomfortable thing in the world. I want to be just as important to your care as you are to mine, okay?”