by Van Barrett
But still. I did want it. I could wrestle and suppress my urges all I wanted, but I couldn't stop that one primal desire. For some reason, I wanted it. No matter how much we both prayed otherwise, I wanted a pair of hot lips wrapped around my hard cock.
Watching Lane suck me off was a completely different story. A story about love and devotion and how, with the right person, gifting pleasure was an incredible joy all on its own. It was something that should bring two people together – not force them apart or make them feel guilty or bad or wrong or unwanted.
I want your cum.
That's what I saw in Lane's eyes.
Give me your cum.
“Oh my God,” I panted, my urgency rising. “Oh my God!”
Give me your cum!
My hips raised from the bed. Lane took me deeper, burying me in his throat. I'd never come in a mouth before. I'd learned that was gross, and wrong, and I wasn't supposed to do that – so the taboo thought filled me with a panic.
“Lane I'm gonna cum!” I warned, my words running together, hoping he had enough time to pop my dick out of his mouth in time before I did the unmentionable.
But no. He glanced up at me again, his eyes winking without really winking. He spoke me to with his eyes: 'I know, dude, that's what I want!'
“UUUUURAGGH!” I bellowed as the pressure blast erupted, and my balls emptied.
My body thrashed wildly on the mattress. My arms flailed, my legs kicked helplessly. And Lane sucked my load right out of me. I never had a chance. It rolled right down his throat. He'd swallowed all my sperm.
“I … oh … ha … hah! … oh …”
I babbled non-sense as I laid flat on my back. I was wrecked. Ruined. Spasms coursed through my body, making me jolt and twitch randomly. Lane still had me in his mouth. He made sure to milk me for every last drop of my cream. He teased my still-hard tool with his tongue. He sucked me tight, but not too tight, with his cheeks. Slowly, he brought me back down from the highest peaks.
And, at last, the ability to speak coherent words returned to me.
“Oh … My … God, Lane!” I panted with a fistful of bed sheets gripped tight in my palms. My whole chest trembled.
Lane laughed. The sound was sexy as hell – the sound of his laughs, muffled by the presence of my swollen penis between his cheeks. And even sexier still when his laughs tapered off into a long, indulgent moan. Because all his sucking and slurping was getting me hard again. I didn't doubt I could blow a second load. And I didn't doubt Lane would happily suck it right out of me, either.
He started to suck and slurp all over again. And those happy sounds filled the air once more.
Slurp, slurp. Smack! Slurp, slurp.
“Mmmm.”
“Oh, God, Lane,” I panted breathlessly.
And then – bzzt! Bzzt! – my eyes widened as a buzzing stirred against my leg.
Did Lane just bust a vibrator out in here?
Bzzt! Bzzt!
Lane took my cock out of his mouth. “Uh. River.”
“Yeah?”
“Your phone's ringing, dude.”
“Oh. Right.” I reached into my pocket and pulled it out. I peeked at the screen before I answered. Huh? Seventeen missed calls? The fuck's going on?
I answered the phone. “Hello?” I watched as Lane kissed and sucked my glans before pushing me back down his throat again.
“River! Where the hell are you?”
“Coach!” I yelped. Fuck! I'd totally forgotten!
“You coming or what? We're all on the bus waiting, River!”
“Sorry! I'll be there in a minute!”
I hung up and looked at Lane. He wore an 'oh shit' fifty-yard stare.
“Ugh.” I groaned. “Just … a little more?”
Lane, his uncertain eyes locked on mine, bobbed down my length.
“Ohhhh. Fuck.”
Lane came off me. “River … I dunno if this is really a good id--”
“Just, just a little more. Don't stop.”
“River!”
“Please …” I panted desperately.
Up and down Lane went; one, two, three quick pumps. That easily, he could throat all of me.
“Oh, fuck!” I roared. “God, you're good!”
But Lane sat up in a hurry. “River!”
“What?”
“You have to go! You're late!”
“But--”
“I'm not gonna be the reason you're late, River! Go!”
He hoisted me to my feet, turned me around, and pushed me out the door.
“Don't forget your wallet this time!”
“But …”
“Go, River!”
I found myself outside, the front door slamming in my face. Huh. That was interesting. I'd never been kicked out of my own place before. Much less all the other stuff that just happened.
But out here, out in the hall, the spell was broken and I could think clearly again.
“Oh my God,” I muttered to myself. I checked my watch. It was 7:25. I was late as fuck and the team might miss our flight because of it. “I gotta go!”
I ran down the stairs, sprinted to my bike, fired her up and raced off to the arena.
Don't kill me, Coach …
26
Suspicions
– Lane –
I stood in River's apartment staring at the door I'd just pushed him through. The air was charged but eerily calm. I was reminded of when storm clouds roll through town only to leave as fast as they arrived. And now a gentle suction, a draft that followed in River's wake, was all that remained.
That, and the quiet music on River's stereo, as Vivaldi continued his exploration of the four seasons.
It's a weird thing, when you finally get what you want, and you're not sure if it's actually what you wanted, and you're not sure how to feel about it now that you've had it. Like a spoiled brat who shreds through all his presents on Christmas morning, and finds himself knee-deep in a mess of torn-up wrapping paper, toys and clothes … I want to pout and raise my arms and ask, “… am I getting more? Or was that really it?”
How should I feel about what just happened? Happy? Satisfied? Sexy? Optimistic?
Or should I feel something worse? Uncertain? Worried? Idiotic? Slutty?
It's funny how fast you can go from such heights to such lows after a whirlwind romance.
Deke laid in his bed, but he wasn't asleep anymore. He'd been woken by all the moaning and groaning, and River's loud grunting and yelling in the throes of his climax. Deke slumped with a look of sad defeat in his big brown doggy eyes. I smirked at him. Ha. Now there was a feeling I knew I could indulge in.
“You thought you could keep us apart, didn't you Deke? Okay, you wanted your Mom back … I understand that, and I don't blame you. But she's not coming back. 'Cause she wasn't any good for your Dad.”
Deke stretched until his legs shook and then shut his eyes with a whinny.
“Oh hell, am I really gloating to a dog?”
I made my way back to River's bedroom, pushed open the door, and examined the scene. River's weight and frame had left an impression on the mattress. I could see where his legs had spread just moments ago. I saw the darkened wet splotch on his bed sheets – my saliva that had dribbled down River's balls, dripped down his thighs and ass.
He'd left an impression on me, too. He'd filled my mouth with his warm load. I licked the insides of my cheeks, savoring the last remaining taste of his seed. Wow. It was him, alright: his male essence. Strong, salty, and a touch sweet. And most of all, undeniably manly.
I threw myself in River's bed with a contented sigh and let the memories play out in my mind. I unbuckled my belt, took off my shorts and jerked myself off. This act would've been grossly taboo and wrong an hour ago, but now it felt like something I had implicit permission to do.
I stroked myself off, thinking about River's dick, the same one that had just been throbbing in my lips. He was every bit as long and thick as his dildo – bigger, even
, especially when I got him real excited.
“Unghh!” I moaned, lifting the hem of my shirt just in time. My cum splattered on my belly and trickled down my sides, defiling River's bed sheets.
“Fuck,” I sighed. I stroked my still-hard cock, my slippery cum turning frothy and creamy in my fist.
River Brame. Shit. He was basically a celebrity athlete at our school. And I had seduced that tall, popular hunk.
After I made myself cum a second time, I more or less collapsed on top of his sheets with a dopey grin on my face and went right to sleep, still riding on cloud nine.
***
So there I was. River and the boys just played their last game of the season – a big victory. The UND crowd was going wild, and I just had this big smile on my face. I made my way through the arena and waited outside the dressing room for the team to come out, so I could congratulate them, and especially congratulate River for reaching the finish line. Because now he was going to make the leap to the NHL and be a big star.
I waited outside in the hall. Waiting and waiting and waiting for that team to emerge. But they didn't come out. I could hear them laughing and shouting in the room. They were celebrating! It was the last game of the season, after all, who could blame them?
So I waited longer. Until I grew impatient. I wanted to grab River. Tell him it was time to go. So I went in. I pushed the door open and barged right into the party. Everyone stopped talking immediately. The party just died. And all those hockey players stared at me with a look of disbelief.
I glanced down. I was naked. Oh. Right. I forgot to dress myself today.
They all started laughing in that hockey player gregarious uproar – “bwahahahah!”
I spotted River in the middle of it, too. He laughed too, but not as loud as the others. He wanted to fit in with the others, so he laughed, but he laughed nervously, looking all around him to make sure everyone else was still laughing at me, too.
And then … I spotted a hair clipper. So I did the first thing that popped into mind. I grabbed it, and I buzzed my hair off until I was bald. And then I got on my knees and thrust handfuls of my hair clippings into River's lap.
“Take it! Take it!” I pleaded with him. “Please, just take it! I want you to have it!”
River's face contorted with disgust. “Dude! What're you doing? No! I don't want it!” He angrily brushed my hair off his hockey pants with a shudder.
…
“AH!”
I sat up, drenched with a cold sweat. River's clock said it was 3:23 AM.
“Fuck,” I muttered. It's the kind of dream that fucks you up so bad, you're afraid to go back to sleep. So I tossed and turned, but sleepy eyes eventually won the battle and drew me back in.
Cloud nine was nice while it lasted, but that River nightmare was just a sample of what awaited me: a night full of long and arduous dreams. I was relieved when I woke up to see daylight, daylight at last, and knew it was safe to get myself out of bed.
I took Deke out for a quick walk, fed him, watered him. Then I checked my phone. One text. My heart jumped – seeing a message from River right now could save me a lot of angsty what-ifs. Even if it was a bad kind of message, it would at least let me know where we stand.
But it wasn't from River, it was from Devon instead. I opened her text and read: 'OMG. LOL. You did NOT just do that.'
I gasped. Shit. Does she know about me and River already? How'd she find out?!
I texted her back: 'Did what? What'd you hear?'
She replied, complete with a jaw-drop emoji: 'The email u sent last night DUH. Holy crap!'
“Oh. Right,” I mumbled to myself. I'd forgotten that I'd e-mailed her the picture of River's dildo. Yep, just casually forgetting things like, you know, betraying this awesome guy River to ease temporary tensions with my friend Dev.
God, was I ever a smart guy or what?
I texted her back. 'Drinks tonight? Earlier? ASAP?'
Her reply came a few minutes later. 'haha. i'm busy til later. How about at judys tavern tonight? We can catch the game'
I agreed.
***
Later that evening, I met Devon at Judy's Tavern. We greeted with a hug. I didn't want the blow-up from the other day to linger, so I brought it up right away to clear the air.
“Hey, Dev. Listen, I'm really sorry about what I said last time. I really didn't mean to hurt you, but I know what I said was shitty. I'm sorry.”
She shrugged it off. “Hey. Don't worry about it. I'm sorry too for lashing out.”
We bought our drinks and settled down at a table.
“So how's babysitting River's dog going?”
“It's … going,” I said with a swallow.
She knew something was up. “What?” she giggled with a curiosity.
“Nothing! The dog's fine. I think he hates me. But he's getting used to me. He has to.” I stirred the ice cubes in my drink with my straw. “For the next few hours, anyway.”
“Okay.” She looked around the bar while she collected her thoughts. “So nothing happened?”
“No …?” I eyed her, maybe a little suspiciously: Did she know something? “What do you mean?”
“Based on the text you sent me – asking to get a drink 'ASAP' – I assumed you had something big to tell me.” She took a sip through her straw and raised her eyebrows at me in a manner that seemed to say, 'I know there's more to this story, Lane Matthews, even if you don't want me to know it.'
“Ohhh.” I nodded my head. “Right.”
“Well? Did something happen?”
Could I tell her? Of course I could tell her! After all, she was right! she'd been practically predicting we had some kind of chemistry from day one. This is the kind of thing me and Dev have always been open and honest about with each other! No secrets between us!
But on the other hand … River wouldn't want anyone finding out, I'm sure. And wouldn't his concerns take priority? Considering what's on the line for him. And was it a jinx to tell Devon about me and River? And how could I tell Devon this, after I'd already betrayed River's trust by snapping that photo! And …
Devon's laughter interrupted my crazed internal monologue. “What's this about, Lane?”
“Nothing! Nothing.”
“You're acting really weird. Are you sure we're cool?”
“Yes! Yes. We're totally cool.”
“And you're sure nothing happened last night?” She gave me that sassy, all-knowing look again.
Damn it. Don't make me lie. World's worst liar, remember?
“Ya. I'm sure,” I grunted hoarsely. I think I even touched my nose and pulled at my shirt collar. Two blatant gestures people are known to make when they're lying.
“Wow. You're such a bad liar, Lane! It never gets old.”
I sighed. “I'm just – really nervous. And I'm feeling bad. I shouldn't have sent you that picture of River's, well, you-know-what. Please don't share it with anyone, alright?”
“Of course I won't! Here. Watch me delete it.” She pulled out her phone and showed me as she deleted the e-mail. “Voila. Gone.”
“Thanks.”
She leaned forward and sipped her drink through the straw. “He sure has a nice one though, doesn't he?”
“God, yes he does,” I panted.
“Think it's bigger in real life?”
“I kn-- I'm sure it is.” I grunted.
She took another sip from her drink. I stared off into space, doing my best to avoid the weight of her knowing eyes. She was toying with me. She knew I was keeping something from her. My only solace was that I knew she didn't have any idea what I was hiding from her. Even if she liked to joke about me and River hooking up, I don't think she could ever picture it happening … even in her wildest dreams.
Because if she did suspect it? All she had to do was ask. And then watch my world crumble as I try to stutter and deflect and change the subject. Boom. I'd be roasted.
I wanted to tell her, of course. Everyone wants to tell thei
r best friend when something huge and amazing happens in their life. But sometimes it's just not yet time. You have to keep it all bottled up. And that sucks. Especially when it creates a blockage between you and your friend. And they know something's not right.
We struggled through conversation. We talked like two acquaintances who make big plans to meet up and hang out, only to discover that they've run out of things to talk about after five minutes.
“Okay, we are not on the same page today, Lane.”
“I knoooow,” I said with a whine. I trotted out a new excuse and hoped it might put Devon's mind at ease. “I didn't get good sleep last night. I tossed and turned all night. Sleeping in a new bed, you know? It's always a weird adjustment.”
“Hm. I see.”
“But hey, I'm really excited to see how River's going to play in this game.”
That was the truth – although, I guess I might be more nervous than excited. Because River had told me earlier that he didn't play well when he was mad. He said he played best when he was happy.
So, therefore, common logic would dictate the following: if River had a bad game … he wasn't happy about what happened between us. On the other hand, if he had a good game … that would mean good things and our future together will be rosy!
Okay, maybe it wasn't the most scientific of experiments. But at this point, I'd take whatever I could get.
“Are you excited to see Jono play?” I asked her.
She swallowed heavily and grumbled out some words I couldn't quite hear or understand.
Ah, there's always two sides to a coin, and I knew Devon well enough to know when she was hiding things. But after our fight the other day? I'm not about to call her out on anything relating to the boys in her life or how their relationships operate. Not my business. No way, no how.
“Oh, good.” I took a look at my watch. The game was about to start in 20 minutes. “I bet they're probably all getting amped up in the dressing room right about now, huh?”
“Yeah, probably.”
27