by Frater, Lara
Each day Simon and Aisha had lessons from Jim about organizing and supplies, from Rosa how to farm, Harlan taught Aisha how to shoot, Maddie taught them math, science, English, history and how to cook, I taught them medicine, Dave, electricity, Jake, engineering, and Eli, plumbing. We wanted to make sure these kids survived but weren’t stupid. We didn’t think there would be college in their future. Brie took some basic lessons from Maddie, mostly reading and math.
For what, I didn’t know. Maybe humankind had a survival mechanism in us that made us not want to kill ourselves when we faced extinction.
“How are you? You don’t look well.”
“Like the rest of you, I’m tired.”
“You need to take care. Maybe take tomorrow off?”
Everyone could take a day per week, unless there was an emergency but I never really take any time other than a daily lunch with Maddie
“I’m okay, Rosa, really.”
“I know, but losing Abe was hard for us, especially you.”
I nodded. I didn’t want to talk about it and especially Abe. Thoughts of his death don’t conjure up sadness but anger.
“I have to check on Annemarie. She has a cold.”
Rosa seemed to understand I didn’t want to talk anymore.
I headed to the door. I found it surprisingly warm today. Once upon a time, I might play hooky on such a day, spend some time in the park to enjoy early spring, either with Carl or Dan, my lover, but now I wished I could get up, kiss my husband, and go to work.
I opened the door to a metal staircase, made my way down the stairs and found Jake at the lowest step.
“Problem with the stairs?” I asked.
“Nah, my weekly check. These stairs weren’t meant for high foot traffic.”
“But they are okay?”
“Yep, okie dokie.” Jake was a good looking Asian engineer student who tried to sleep with me. I told him I was a closeted lesbian. He respected that. I wished it were true. He moved on to the rest of the females here. I didn’t really care if he sleeps with anyone, as long as they used condoms.
Annemarie didn’t take it well. When Jake began sleeping with her, she wanted a commitment, but Jake didn’t. She wanted someone who could warm her bed at night and make her feel safe. At best she got a few nights with Harlan. Jake was still willing to be with her some of those lonely nights but instead they barely spoke.
Jake continued his philandering. I don’t know how far he got except I know Maddie thinks he’s a sweet kid and good for her when she has needs.
People were bored. We all wanted to survive, but we couldn’t deal with that all the extra time even with busy work Jim made up. Electricity went out about nine months before. We mostly went without electricity, sticking to a wake up at dawn, go to sleep at dusk routine. We had two solar panels, a generator with only a small amount of fuel, and batteries in the store. We had propane as the CostKing was getting ready for barbeque season. We used it to cook and for heat in the winter. If we had more panels, we might have more electricity but CostKing only had two as display models. To get more you had to have them special ordered. I didn’t think the factory in Tennessee would be shipping anytime soon. They had the panels on the roof and they used it to run a flat screen TV, a $995 CostKing special and some lamps in the store. Dave switched the hook up so we could have lights in the infirmary, on the roof for Princess and kept an energy efficient chest freezer running for what perishables we had left, mostly meat. Dave set it up with capacitor bank of portable batteries so the freezer would run on cloudy days and nights. For an asshole, he sure knew how to wire the place.
We had a lot of batteries and grateful that the store had been stocking camping supplies, but the batteries wouldn’t last forever. We used some of our power to run phones or tablets to see if any internet or phones were still online. For about three days we chatted with a group in California on a social network who had been hit hard by the flu but hadn’t seen zombies. Then the social network went down. Maybe their server went down or maybe the zombies overran them or maybe they all died. We’ll probably never know.
Now no one responded. No voices on the radio. No connection on the internet or any of the phones CostKing had for sale. Static all the way down the dial.
“Where’s Aisha?” I asked. “I thought she was working with you?”
She did, and then she left,” he said. “I think she had to get a lesson for Maddie.”
I found Dave Carr, my second least favorite person, waiting outside the bakery. The infirmary was in the health and beauty aisles and on the opposite end of the store closer to the front and I know he would walk with me all the way complaining about something.
I knew little about him, only that he is in his late thirties, an electrician, and a son of a bitch who loved to use slurs behind people’s backs.
“Yes, Dave?” I walked a brisk pace to the infirmary.
We need to be careful about who we pick.” He said, trying to keep up with my pace.
“I know that.”
Do you, Rachel?” Dave called me by my real name all the time. He refused to call me Doctor or Doc. Besides being a racist, he was also a chronic complainer, but refused leadership when I offered. “Do you want another Tom?”
“Tom was already in the store when Abe came.”
Dave looked lost for words then said. “Let Mindy know that.”
Abe was careful. We never let in anyone we didn’t like.”
“What about your useless fattie?”
I wanted to punch him or at least make him go away. Dave sported an entering middle age paunch. For some reason he took a dislike to her. I want to say because she was black but Dave never complained about Robert. Maybe because Robert was a man. “Maddie has been exceptional at saving foods and keeping it fresh and delicious and the children adore her and they still need an education.”
“She’s useless.”
“So are you sometimes.” The words came out before I could stop them. I broke one of my underwritten rules, ‘do not engage with Dave.’
“Hey,” said a voice behind us, saving me from Dave’s wraith. “Don’t stress out the doc. We need her most of all.” We both stopped walking and turned around.
It was Eli, a plumber in his former life. Eli was bigger than Maddie, but never got Dave’s wrath, because he was his only friend. Eli wasn’t much better than Dave at times, he was younger and prone to anger, but Eli seemed to have more self-control and had no hint of racism. Dave complained behind people’s backs but Eli would tell it right to your face. Eli also acted as unofficial dad to the kids, even to Aisha who often resented having to listen to adults but Simon and Brie adored him. He loved kids. All of his died of the flu.
“We’re almost ready. Jim said you should start moving.”
“Thank you, Eli,” I said and followed him, anxious to get away from Dave.
But he got in the last word. “Remember what I said, Rachel. No Toms.”
I was technically a late comer to this merry group. When Abe and his band: Dave, Mindy, and Brie came to the CostKing, four employees and three customers were already here: Ashley, a 60 year old cashier, Robert and Joseph, who did stock and Tom, an assistant manager. Among the customers were Debra, Annemarie, and an old man named Jonathan. The ten of them decided to share the CostKing and lock out anyone except those with skills they could use. Even though only Robert had any skills, as his job was to lift heavy items and drive the fork lift. They were only here a week when Tom lured Mindy to the stock room and raped her. Abe killed him. Joseph, upset over what Abe did to Tom, left and never returned.
Ever since then, we were careful not to invite anyone who seemed suspicious. No one here was a criminal, though some like Dave were real assholes.
The group began to invite people with skills in. First it was Jim, and then Princess invited herself.
After I came, we were attacked by a group of men who wanted our CostKing. They managed to get through a window and killed Debra. Princess
, who Abe hated to be indebted to, saved the day and then asked for 30 Xanax as payment.
She got it.
For a while we didn’t ask anyone, still weary from the attack. However Robert saw Simon hovering around the repair shop and convinced Abe to let him in.
After that we got Eli, Harlan, Rosa, Aisha, Jake and Maddie.
On Christmas Day, we had a roaring celebration to boast morale which was low, the holidays hit us the hardest, even me and I’m Jewish. For many of us it was the realization that not only were we not going to have our family members back, but the world would never be what it was.
At 12:01, a minute after Christmas was over, Abe excused himself. He went to the roof and jumped off. Jumping off the roof was not the best way to go as it isn’t that high up but he didn’t survive the fall. Princess without emotion said he dove head first like he was going into a swimming pool. He had been laughing and joking even as he left for the roof. No one knew he planned to do it.
Jonathan froze to death soon after. I wonder if he offed himself as well. Abe set up leadership: he was in charge of a four member council that included Jim, Eli, Ashley and me. After Abe’s death, all three voted for me to become leader. I voted for Jim.
We didn’t add anyone to the council; they gave me two votes instead. Today was the day we would find out if that worked.
The walk to the pharmacy seemed to take forever. I had shopped in this store before and I didn’t remember it being this big. Ashley stood near the entrance with Jim. She was a petite woman in her late fifties with grey hair with dark ends from her grown out dye job. Eli joined her. Abe put Ashley on the council so she would feel useful. She was an unskilled laborer, high school diploma and working dead end jobs to both live on and give some cash to a former drug addict daughter going through college. She didn’t have anything to offer except be working at CostKing already when Abe came in.
She enjoyed her leadership role. It made her not think if her adult kids, a girl and a boy, and two grandchildren were alive or not. Because of her age, she knew we wouldn’t go to heroic methods to save her. Jim and I gave her a sheet of codeine which was against the rules. Except for Princess and Ernie, painkillers must be preserved for emergencies.
Princess got two Vicodin for when she had to do something outside her normal duty. I didn’t know if she was using it or making sure she had them. We have an ample supply of Vicodin and when we finished, we would give her Xanax.
The pharmacy was locked and only Jim and I had keys because only two keys could be found. In it we kept most of the painkillers including the over the counter ones. Although everyone was given two big bottles of whatever OTC they wanted. I chose generic Tylenol. We also kept the antibiotics which we’ve only had to use once.
“Hey doctor,” Ashley said.
“Good morning, Ashley.”
“Heard we got some good candidates,” she said.
“Any have medical training?”
“Pharmacist, that’s all and a massage therapist.”
I laughed and Ashley looked at me oddly. I guess Princess might get her masseuse after all. “Let me go check on Annemarie, and I’ll be with you shortly.”
We kept the infirmary next to the pharmacy, among the vitamin, beauty and drug aisles and tented it off with blankets with a single space heater inside to keep it warm and a floodlight for night. I pulled a blanket aside and found Annemarie and Mindy chatting. Mindy wore a mask to not catch Annemarie’s cold. Despite that Jake often slept with Mindy, she and Annemarie were best friends.
“Hey doctor,” Mindy said. Mindy was a divorced woman in her late 20’s whose husband left her with a high school education and debt while he got his MBA. She ended up becoming a home health aide to make ends meet and had planned to go nursing school. She was my honorary nurse.
Mindy had the triple whammy of dealing with the flu, fleeing from zombies and dealing with the dregs of society. Tom had knocked her out and dragged her to loading dock where he had his way with her for two hours. It was only by luck that Abe found them. Abe shot both of Tom’s knees with his own gun, and gave him to the zombies. I don’t know if I wouldn’t have been so cruel.
Mindy coped as best she could. She knew enough to take HIV meds and the morning after pill. So far she seemed to be clean.
“Hey Annemarie, how are you doing?” I should wear a mask but didn’t. Instead I kept a few feet distant, even though I rarely got colds
Annemarie’s response was a sneeze. Around her were vitamin C, D, zinc cold remedies and some decongestives.
“Thanks for the time off.” Her voice sounded nasal. Annemarie was a plump woman with pretty red hair in her early twenties, who had been studying communications at Hofstra, when the flu started. She had been gathering supplies at CostKing when a riot broke out near her school. She didn’t try to go back.
A communications major really doesn’t do much but Annemarie was a quick study. Her job became being an assistant to anyone who needed it, usually Jim, and act as our third rooftop shooter. She was the worst of all three. She usually got day duty because it was easier to see the zombies.
“We definitely don’t want you to get sicker.”
She nodded, blew her nose. Colds and respiratory illnesses spooked me. A chilly reminder of the flu epidemic that changed the world. This was an ordinary cold, probably passed on from someone in the repair shop, as Annemarie was social. The flu would incapacitate you.
“We don’t want to spread it. I’m going to have to ask you to stay in here at least until tomorrow.”
“Come on, I can be sick in my own aisle. I won’t leave it.”
“We have a decent selection of movies and books. Jim can bring you some later. It’s warmer here than your aisle.”
“How about Shaun of the Dead?” she said and laughed.
One night she ransacked the DVD and book section destroying anything about zombies; Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Zombieland, World War Z all turned into pieces.
I don’t blame her. It doesn’t seem funny when you were in it.
“What you should do is drink lots of water and rest. I’ll ask Maddie to make you hot tea. Do you want a sleeping pill? I have to go get Princess hers.”
Annemarie rolled her eyes at the mention of Princess. In a popularity poll, Princess would rate at the bottom and Jim at the top. “Sure, I’ll take one.”
I made my way to the pharmacy, unlocking the door and letting it close behind me
With the door locked, no one could see me. I started crying, softly, I did this once a day, part of my routine. I had to do it to keep the memories from flooding in and impairing me.
I contained myself in five minutes, knew I had to keep it together for the others. I wiped my eyes with a tissue box that Jim probably left. He probably knew I came in here to cry. He knew everything. I grabbed two bottles from the shelf. Two pain pills for Princess and one sleeping pill for Annemarie. I could take a bunch of these pills. Then it would be over and I would be with my family. Jim would find me. Would he try to revive me or accept my choice? Was it right for me to do this after what happened with Abe?
I didn’t want to be leader, I wasn’t even sure I wanted to survive. Even if the humans did win, what kind of life was left for us?
“Annemarie,” I said, handing her the pill. “I expect you to use this. You should sleep as much as possible.”
“I might be about to go tonight for a couple of hours,” she said then coughed.
“In the freezing cold? I don’t think so. Harlan will do some extra hours, I’ll have Ashley, Jim, or Dave on sentry duty.”
“I feel useless.”
“I’ll have Harlan give you some rifle magazines to load.”
CostKing didn’t sell guns; there was a burnt out Smile-Mart in the same shopping center, where we got rifle rounds, but we only had three rifles, two shotguns and a handgun that only had 20 bullets, and we had eight boxes of shotgun shells. That gun and one shotgun were locked in the pharmacy. Pr
incess brought two of the rifles and two suitcases filled with rifle ammo that we were about a third of the way through. She kept one of those rifles with her at all time. Her favorite. I think she slept with it. We only let the sharpshooters have the rifles. The rest of us use weapons of choice, baseball bats, tire irons, crowbars and golf clubs. We even sharpened the edges of broom handles as long reach weapons. A few people had their own guns and kept them. I know Mindy had her own handgun with only a four rounds in it. It had been Tom’s gun originally. He gave it to Mindy as some kind of morose present.
Annemarie didn’t look satisfied but seemed too sick to complain.
“Doc,” said Jim’s voice from outside the curtain. “We’re ready.”
“Take care,” I told Annemarie, then left the infirmary. I would check up on her and the others later.
Chapter 2 We created a makeshift meeting room between the store and the automotive repair shop. The room had originally been the food court. This area and the repair shop gave us extra space between us and the outside world. Before this happened the two spaces were separate because they closed an hour earlier than the store. The food court had been stripped clean of food a long time ago but still had a slight smell of decay. We put together several tables from the food court and Jim put five chairs around it and one chair in front. The rest had been stacked up behind us. Robert would move that stack in front of the door when we were done.
Eli, Ashley, Robert and Princess were already in the room. Princess looked bored. I came in with Jim. We sat at the table with Princess looking decidedly non-menacing behind us.
We would interview them one at a time, talk no more than 10 minutes and then vote. Robert opened the door to a young white man with greasy shaggy brown hair, wearing a puffy coat, who looked like a college student. Robert shook him down and recovered a crowbar.
“That’s mine,” he said. “I wasn’t gonna use it on you, just the zomb’s.”