by Eva Chase
If I’d had any idea that I might spy on the Hearts’ Guard and learn more about their plans—when it came to me or to the other Spades—I quickly saw I could forget about that. The city folk might have taken some temporary delight in the unfamiliar weather, but the novelty must have worn off fast. The rain-dappled streets lay empty, everyone with a lick of sense tucked away behind their doors. I didn’t pass a single guard in my roaming. It appeared they had more sense than I did as well.
There was one place I could nearly guarantee I’d find Wonderlanders still up. Without really thinking about it, I ended up outside the spinning walls of Caterpillar’s Club. It couldn’t hurt to listen in on whatever gossip was being passed around in there.
For the sake of caution, I stayed in the muted realm of the in-between as I slipped into the club beneath the oscillating lights that colored the dance floor. The thrum of the music didn’t fully overwhelm my senses. I bobbed with it, swaying this way and that amid the dancers.
At first, I kept my ears pricked and eyes wide. A couple of guards lingered on the fringes of the crowd, but they spoke to no one, their expressions more bored than anything else. The Clubbers, as I should have expected, let loose no more than calls for drinks and exclamations of revelry. After our time tramping around the Plains, I’d forgotten how little the rest of Wonderland knew of or cared about our questing.
It’d be a relief not to care about it myself for a time, wouldn’t it? To lose myself in the whirl and color like I had so often in the past.
I let go of my surveillance, if not my invisibility, and gave myself over to the faded beat. If I brushed against a fellow dancer here or there, what of it? They’d assume it’d been one of the companions they could see.
That thought should have comforted me, but in the grayed space with rain-damp clinging to my clothes, it dulled all the enjoyment I might have felt too. I was nothing to these people, really. They didn’t care whether the guards looked for me, took me. While Lyssa and the others rested to prepare for our next steps at saving this land, could I really be so selfish to seek mindless revelry instead?
My stomach clenched. Maybe there was something constructive I could have accomplished in the club, but I couldn’t stand to search for it while my skin itched this way. I pulled myself out of the crowd and back into the night outside.
The rain had picked up to a steady patter in my absence. I resisted the urge to shake myself and slunk on through the streets with an eye to finding an unsecured space where I might get some rest of my own. My usual sleeping spot would be more bog than bed in this weather.
The Spades had a safe house I’d made use of on occasion in the cellar beneath a candy café. I slipped down there and immediately wrinkled my nose at the dripping of water that was slicking down the outer walls. Another leak tapped a growing puddle in the middle of the floor. Not the dry escape I’d been looking for. There had to be someplace better.
A few streets farther along, candlelight flickered in a shop window next to a doorframe that had lost its door. The flame blinked out a moment later, but I crept over and ducked inside.
A trio of figures I recognized vaguely from meetings of the Spades had hunkered down among stacks of dresses no one had bothered to hang on the racks. One of them was already snoring. I tucked myself into a corner where the shifting of the silky fabric I lay down on would go unnoticed in the dark and closed my eyes. I’d accepted worse accommodations in times past.
Murmurs carried from the other end of the room, audible in the quiet. “How much longer until the White Knight returns, do you think?”
“He wouldn’t leave the city any longer than he felt he had to.”
News of our arrival hadn’t had the chance to spread far. I was debating showing myself to pass on the word when the first speaker went on.
“Cheshire will be with him, won’t he?”
“It’s hard to say, the way he vanishes into the air.”
“Not well enough to escape the Diamonds’ notice, apparently.”
“I’ve heard he used to visit them at the palace ages ago. Can’t have been too caught up with them or the White Knight wouldn’t trust him, but they may be wise to his tricks.”
Not all of them, I thought, but my body stayed rigidly in place, my lips clamped shut.
“Who knows what else he’s been up to? He’s helped the cause, sure, but he’s a difficult one to figure.”
“I suppose if there’s anything to sort out there, it’ll sort out on its own in time.”
They lapsed into silence. I stared at the ceiling, hazy in the dark, the knot that had formed in my gut in the club doubling in size.
A difficult one to figure. That was fair, wasn’t it? How much of myself had I shown any of my compatriots? By the lands, I couldn’t say even Hatter or the White Knight really knew me despite the raw moments they’d witnessed.
And that was my doing, no one else’s. I held myself apart. I’d done it again tonight, hadn’t I? Choosing to sleep by relative strangers on discarded clothes rather than accept hospitality from the closest figure I had to a friend.
Would I really want to live any differently? I hadn’t been thinking only of myself but of avoiding loading more onto them than they could possibly be prepared for. The ragged, wrong pieces inside of me, I couldn’t do more than bury deep—I had no reason to believe they’d ever set themselves right. There’d been something off-kilter to my nature to begin with, or I’d never have careened into the situations I had.
The Spades had stopped talking, but a different kind of sounds seeped through my chaotic thoughts. A hitch of a sigh, a rustle of fabric, an encouraging murmur half muffled by a kiss. These two were partners in more than just rebelling.
My mind flitted to moments past: to Lyssa gazing down at me with desire bright in her eyes, telling me she wanted me. To the soft but passionate press of her lips then and as the Tower had whisked us up to the White Knight’s apartment the next day. Heat I couldn’t suppress unfurled in my chest and flooded down to my cock. Set wrong or not, I was still a man. A man who wished he’d had the opportunity to draw those sounds and more from our Otherlander queen.
The jolt of panic that followed that longing, sharper than any other sensation around me, made me sit up on the scattered clothes. I had the impression of Lyssa’s face, etched with horror; of desire vanishing behind pity…
I pressed the heels of my hands to my eyes. She didn’t know me either. Not really, not fully. She couldn’t.
But right then, damp and disheveled with traces of another couple’s pleasure reaching my ears, the instinctive protest felt suddenly absurd. I was running from Lyssa—from the kindest and most compassionate person I’d ever met. A woman who hadn’t been fazed by the many horrors this place had already thrown at her. Did I really think so little of her that I expected she’d cast me aside over my past inclinations?
No. I believed in her. I’d once trusted the Duchess with that side of myself—how could I say I cared about Lyssa at all if I wouldn’t give her even the same chance when she’d earned so much more faith?
I didn’t want to stay here. I didn’t want to roam aimlessly like a stray tomcat. I might not have a real home, but I had someone who’d welcome me in.
I eased out of the store and through the rain to Hatter’s house. My feet moved steadily but restlessly under me. Mindful of the security measures taken, I scrambled up a nearby building and clambered over to the upper bedroom window.
As I perched by the ledge, droplets trickled through my hair and down the neck of my shirt. They turned even colder when I shifted back into the physical realm. A shiver jittered through my body, but still my hand hesitated by the glass.
Lyssa was on the other side. If I could trust I’d get any one thing from her, it was warmth. The rest… I’d take it as it came.
Focusing on the imagined sensation of heat and comfort, I rapped my knuckles against the pane.
WRATHFUL WONDERLAND - BONUS SCENE #2
A re
you dying to know what happened to Theo after he helped Lyssa escape? Discover the events on the Wonderland side of the story immediately after Wrathful Wonderland’s final chapter in this bonus scene from his point of view.
Theo
The mirror’s glossy surface swallowed Lyssa in an instant—there and then whisked away, leaving only my tense reflection on the glass. My reflection with the golden curls I’d hidden so long, the features that marked me as one of the Hearts on display in a way that had never felt more obvious.
I closed my eyes, breathing shallowly to limit how much rose scent I took into my lungs, and focused my mind on the image Lyssa landing back at her home, safe from the guards and their swords and my mother’s determination to separate this “Alice” from her head. Training every thought on this one good, real thing I’d managed to accomplish.
It was the first in what would need to be a long line, but every journey started somewhere. No matter what happened next, I’d saved Wonderland’s true queen and defended everyone who’d turned rebel under my leadership.
My mind slid from the imagined Otherland scene to the embrace Lyssa had offered me just minutes ago. Her sweet flavor lingered on my lips. In some ways she was still here with me, holding me steady against the other influences this palace could work. I’d loved Wonderland and its people for so long, but I’d had no idea my body could contain so much affection and admiration for a single person.
All the more reason I needed to prepare this place for her return as quickly as I could.
Squaring my shoulders, I strode through my mother’s rooms to the outer halls. The rose scent faded gradually, but the remembered sensations of a much more welcome intimacy kept me on track. Of course, the real challenge would be addressing the woman who stirred up that scent. As I reached the front of the palace, the tension in my chest gripped my innards.
I’d admitted to Lyssa not long ago that I was afraid of my mother. That was as true now—perhaps even more so—as it’d been then. But if I’d learned anything about a leader’s strength from our Otherlander, it was that fear wasn’t a good enough excuse to back down or hide away. I had to command the sensation, not let it rule me.
At the end of the hall, a looming window overlooked the front gardens. Bits of the broken stands and cage still littered the grass, and a few of the palace guards roamed between them looking unnerved but determined, but the audience for the Queen’s trial had dispersed just as the captive Spades and Clubbers had. I’d put an end to that horrible spectacle—I could take some relief from that.
Before I could decide what my most immediate next step should be, the tapping of hard shoes and the rustle of immense skirts carried from a nearby staircase. My posture stiffened automatically. I turned already knowing who I would see.
My mother swept into the hall with every bit of her usual imperious air, no sign now of how the catastrophe of the “trial” or my unexpected arrival had affected her. Four guards flanked her—apparently she felt she needed direct protection even inside the palace walls these days. Her eyes settled on me with a coolly metallic gleam, but I caught a momentary hesitation in the set of her face. A hint of motherly concern beneath the queenly façade?
I couldn’t count on that, as my own experiences as a child and what I’d observed of my older siblings had proven hundreds of times over.
“Jack,” the Queen of Hearts said, her voice all commanding sharpness. The old name I’d cast off decades ago scraped over my nerves, but I kept my expression schooled calm. “Where have you taken the Alice? I’ve just been to the dungeons, and the guards there haven’t seen her.”
That question was the one that would tear any trust I’d gained with her to shreds. I swallowed tightly and sidestepped it as deftly as I could.
“I need to speak with you about that and other important matters. Perhaps a private conversation, away from any parties outside the family?”
My mother glanced at her guards. Her chin came up, her lips rigidly pursed. “My guards know better than to gossip about matters that are beyond their station. But we can take a small leave of them.” She nodded to the four and strode several steps past me down the hallway, where she could still summon them to her side in an instant but where only raised voices would reach their ears. I supposed that was the most privacy I could hope for given her state of mind.
I followed her to the painting she’d stopped in front of, a scene of minstrels performing in the palace gardens. I might as well be an entertainer about to put on a show now myself. The words lay heavy on my tongue. I had to walk a line even more careful than I ever had in my time balancing the roles as Inventor and White Knight, making my case without wounding a woman so easy to offend. She had to believe I was trying to support her reign, not undermine it.
“I must apologize again for my deception and the long time I’ve stayed away from the palace,” I said. “I never meant to fully abandon my role here—or you. My goal has always been to see Wonderland become the best world it can be with everything we could want for and from our people.”
“They have disappointed much lately,” the Queen muttered. “I could have used you here beside me to keep the order we need.” She peered at me again, her eyes so glittering I couldn’t tell whether any real fondness entered her gaze.
“I think I have accomplished better than that,” I went on tentatively. “By living among the common people as I have, tending to their more ordinary requests, I’ve gained a full picture of what tensions we’re dealing with. They don’t show every side of themselves to those in the palace—out of the due respect and awe, of course.” Not to mention fear.
My mother looked skeptical. “Today’s events prove that if they need anything, it’s a firmer hand and more respect enforced. The insolence… The way that girl barged in on my home…”
Better to get her off the subject of Lyssa for as long as I could redirect her. My mouth was going dry, my pulse hitching here and there as a thicker rose scent wafted off my mother’s dress, but I held my stance and my voice steady.
“I’m afraid we may have gotten ourselves into an unproductive cycle. The commoners act out not because they think they can or should get away with it, but because they feel they have nothing to lose. We ask for a lot from them, but if we did a little more for them, gave them more freedom to live their lives as they see fit, they wouldn’t see the need to fight. They’d honor you even more.”
The queen’s eyes narrowed. “That sounds like fanciful talk, not anything based on reality. I know what we’re dealing with here. I’ve seen what these miscreants will do if given any more ‘freedom.’ Your mind must have gone soft in all the time you’ve spent among them. Let’s have a word with this Alice, and you’ll realize exactly how noxious the lot of them are.”
I was running out of room to maneuver. All I could do was get out as much of my case as I could and hope some part of the Queen was still capable of listening.
“I have talked to her,” I said, “and her only intention today was to save lives. Maybe those lives deserved to be taken in punishment, but I’m sure you can agree few would accept that judgment for themselves or their loved ones without protest. It’s only human nature. Our kingdom will prosper so much more if we work with those impulses instead of punishing people for them. I’ve given it a great deal of thought. I can lay out a few simple steps we could take that would reduce the rebellious behavior tenfold without you sacrificing a shred of authority. You can place all the responsibility on me. I—”
“You were never against her,” my mother interrupted, her face flushing nearly as dark as the crimson on her dress. “All this soft talk—I see it now. She and her ‘Spades’ have poisoned your mind. My son, speaking of freedom and pulling back punishments, excusing the attacks on us as human nature. Where is the Alice, Jack?”
The final question allowed no waffling. I met her gaze unflinching. “Where she should be—home in the Otherland. Where she’ll stay until we can—”
“You…” S
he left off with a strangled sound and snatched my arm, hard enough to bruise the skin. “You will bring her back at once to face the consequences.”
“I can’t,” I said truthfully, bracing myself. “I don’t know how to find her there. But she’s no threat to you when she isn’t even in Wonderland.”
“And what’s to stop her from returning whenever she sees fit?” Spittle flecked the Queen’s lips as her fury grew. “You’ve turned full traitor—lied to me in front of them all—I will not stand for this. It is their doing, her doing, clearly. We must get the poison out of you and bring you back to your proper self.”
Was that perspective better than her understanding I’d taken these actions and said these things of my own free will? I couldn’t say, but I knew I didn’t want to submit to whatever tactics she intended to use to cure me. If appealing to her rationally wouldn’t work, I could turn to my own authority, last-ditch effort though that was.
I tugged my arm from her grasp abruptly enough that her fingers jerked apart and drew myself up even straighter. “I’m the son you raised to be your heir, Mother, and I’m fulfilling my duty to the Hearts with all the skill and devotion I have in me. I’m not a child anymore. Let us sit down and talk this through like the rulers we are—”
“You can rule nothing like this,” the Queen said, her hand flicking toward the guards. “Take my son into custody. To the medical room, where the doctors can do their work. They must counteract this toxic influence quickly.”
“No, Mother, you’re not seeing…”
But she wouldn’t even look at me now, her face pinched tight. The guards marched over with weapons drawn. I had nothing on me but my wits, which might be considerable, but not enough to escape four armed men.
I couldn’t let her take me over again, couldn’t succumb to the influences of the palace. I backed up a step with my hands held up in a gesture of peace. “I don’t want a fight. You can hear that there’s nothing addled about what I’m saying, can’t you? Let my mother and me hash this out ourselves.”