by Cynthia Eden
She shoved at his suit coat, wanting it out of the way.
But Jay gave a ragged laugh. “Sweetheart, my first time with you won’t be a rushed fuck in the back of a limo.”
Why not? The image was hot.
“I’m going to take my time with you.” He was kissing a white-hot trail down her neck. She arched up against him as her heart pounded faster. His left hand had slid down her body. It rested on her stomach, and she wanted his fingers to move. She wanted him to touch her breasts. To touch her—all over. That was what lovers did, right? They touched. They pleasured.
“Jay!” A demand hummed in her voice.
“When we get home, I’m going to make love to you all night long.”
“I don’t want to wait.” Her ragged words.
He’d moved his hand. His fingers slid inside the plunging neckline of her dress, and he teased her nipple. She bit her lip because she hadn’t expected the shock of quick pleasure.
And she wanted more.
“You don’t want to wait? Then how about I give you a taste right now.” His hands moved to her legs. He grabbed the material of her dress and pushed it up. Not fast. Not hard. But slowly, sensuously.
Willow realized she was holding her breath. A lick of fear shot through her because this was new. As far as she was concerned, this was her first time with a lover. And she was hesitating. Her gaze darted to the privacy screen that separated them from the driver.
“I can stop right now.” His hands were on her thighs. His voice was low and gentle.
She didn’t want him to stop.
“The driver can’t hear us. Can’t see us. It’s only you and me. But I can stop right now, if that is what you want.”
She wanted more pleasure. She just wanted what everyone else had. Was that so wrong? “Don’t stop.” A bare whisper.
His fingers trailed up her inner thighs. So sensitive. How had she not realized that particular area of her body was so sensitive? Now she wasn’t holding her breath, Willow was releasing it in a quick rush because his fingers had slipped up her thighs—all the way up until he was touching the crotch of her panties.
And Jay had moved. He’d slid off the seat. Positioned himself between her splayed legs. His gaze wasn’t on her face. He was staring at her body, and she was so incredibly exposed for him because he’d shoved up her skirt.
“These have to go.” He pulled on her panties. Harder than she’d expected. The soft lace tore.
The sound turned her on even more.
“Willow, Willow…sweet Willow.” His fingers caressed her sex. Stroked her. Made her bite her lip. Made her hips surge against him. “I won’t ever be able to go back now.”
She wasn’t sure what that meant. Didn’t really care then because he’d just lowered his head. “Jay?”
He licked her. Licked her and pushed his fingers inside of her, and her own hands flew out to grab onto the seat. Her eyes squeezed closed as her head tipped back. This was so intimate—of course, it was intimate. But she hadn’t expected this. His mouth on her. It was like they’d skipped a thousand steps and gone right to the finish line. It was like—
She came. An absolute explosion of pleasure rocked through her whole body, and Willow clamped down even harder on her lower lip because she didn’t want to scream out her pleasure. It wasn’t some short burst of release. It went on and on, seeming to fill every single cell of her body.
Her breath heaved in and out. Her heartbeat drummed in a double-time rhythm. This was sex? This was pleasure? OhmyGod. How had she forgotten it?
His fingers strummed over her clit.
A ripple of pleasure surged through her as he pressed a final kiss to her. Then he was sliding back. Pulling down her dress. Covering her legs.
And…going back to his seat?
What?
Her breath panted out more. Her nails were digging into the expensive leather of the seat. He sat across from her, his hands between his knees, his stare focused on her. Completely on her. His face was tight, hard. She’d never quite seen him look that way before.
Dangerous.
Jay usually had a quick smile. He usually seemed to be surrounded by a cloud of energy and zest. But right then, a different intensity clung to him. Almost a predatory intensity.
“You…” Okay, her voice was definitely husky. She tried clearing her throat. “You didn’t…”
“I told you our first time wasn’t going to be in a car.” He even sounded different. Jay’s voice was downright guttural. She realized that he held her panties in his right hand. As she watched, he shoved them into the pocket of his coat. “I’ll have you in my home. It will just be you and me, and you won’t have to bite your lip. You can scream as loudly as you want.”
Oh, wow. She swallowed. Made herself take her nails out of the leather.
“You are so fucking beautiful. And you taste like the sweetest sin.”
She could feel her cheeks burning.
“The first time won’t be slow.” Again, he was guttural. She rather liked the roughness of his voice. It sent a shiver over her. “I can’t do slow with you. Not after I had my mouth on you.”
Inside, she felt another pulse of pleasure. Just from his words.
“The first time will be rough. Hard. Wild. We’ll do slow later, if that’s what you want.”
“I don’t know what I want.” Should she be embarrassed to make that confession? With him, right then, Willow found there wasn’t room for embarrassment. It was just him. Just her. And what they were doing together, what they were saying, didn’t feel wrong. “I have no idea what I like.”
His body tensed. “Baby…” He exhaled slowly. “Are you trying to break me?”
She wasn’t sure what that meant. Of course, she didn’t want to break Jay.
“We’ll find out what you like,” Jay promised her as the limo slowed. “We’ll find out every single thing that you enjoy. What makes you moan. What makes you come faster. What drives you absolutely wild. And we’ll do those things over and over again.”
Yes, please.
The limo stopped. She heard the driver exiting. Before he could reach the door, Jay had already opened it. He surged outside. “I’ve got her.” There was a hard, almost possessive edge to his words.
But Jay wasn’t the possessive sort, was he? He offered her his hand as she climbed from the limo. She took it, not hesitating, and a tremor of excitement spiraled through her. She couldn’t look away from Jay. Couldn’t focus on anything but him. Jay was all she could see.
Her heartbeat pounded so fast.
Dimly, she heard him giving instructions to the driver. To the guards who were at the gate. But then she and Jay were heading up the stone steps. Moments later, they were in the house. She heard the quick beep of the alarm resetting behind them. She stood in the foyer, nervously shifting from her left foot to her right on the marble flooring. She waited—
Jay pulled her into his arms. His mouth crashed onto hers. And, no, there was nothing soft or gentle or hesitant about his kiss now. He kissed her like a desperate man. Like he was starving. Or wild. For her. Her mouth opened for him, and she met him eagerly. She’d had a taste of pleasure, and Willow wanted more. She wanted him.
Her hands shoved against his fancy suit jacket, and it hit the floor. Then she was grabbing for his shirt front. Buttons popped and flew, but Jay just laughed. He shrugged out of the shirt, and then he was backing her up, pushing her against the nearest wall. Caging her there with his body while his hands flattened on the wall, positioned on either side of her head. His mouth went to her throat. Kissing. Licking. Biting with the lightest edge of his teeth.
Her breath hissed out. Oh, yes, she liked that. “You said…we’d go fast. Wild.” That was what she wanted. Because her body seemed to be burning inside, a white-hot, sensual fire. She wanted to go wild. Wanted to lose all control. To just be—
With him.
He scooped her into his arms. The move was so unexpected that she gave a little c
ry of surprise. In the next instant, he was kissing her again. Carrying her, kissing her, and Willow wrapped her arms around his neck. Sometimes she forgot just how strong Jay was. He might not be a super soldier, but the man was built. And he carried her as if she weighed nothing.
She loved the way he kissed her. Did all men kiss with such skill? Did they all know just how to use their tongues and their lips?
Or was it just Jay? Just Jay who made her feel so out of control? Who made her want and want and want?
He lowered her onto a bed. His bed.
Then he backed away, staring down at her. “Now,” Jay growled, “we have our first time.”
She still had on her dress. She should take it off, right? Willow figured she should. She eased out of the bed. Stood before him. With trembling fingers, she reached for the zipper in the back.
“Let me.”
A shiver rolled over her, but she turned around, giving him her back. His fingers trailed along her skin, and her eyes closed. The hiss of the zipper filled her ears. The dress fell down, puddling at her feet. His knuckles stroked down her spine, making her quiver. She turned toward him. “Jay—”
He tumbled her onto the bed. His hands were caressing her, his mouth was kissing her—all over. Her legs were spread and his hips pushed between them. He still wore his pants, but she could feel the hard press of his erection through the fabric. He was fully aroused. Long, hard, and thick, and she wanted him inside her.
His mouth closed over her breast. He sucked, licked, marked her with the faint edge of his teeth as her back bowed off the bed. Desire surged through her. She was wet and ready for him, and Willow didn’t want to wait. He’d said they wouldn’t wait. Fast. Hard. Wild. “I need…”
He was kissing his way to her other breast.
Her hips arched again, and her sex surged up against him, riding the hard length of his cock even through his clothes. Her nails raked over his back when he licked her nipple. “Jay!”
He pulled back. Jerked open his pants. Leaned over the edge of the bed and reached into the nightstand. A moment later, he had a small packet in his hand. Condom. She hadn’t even thought about that, she’d been so intent on having sex for the first time—
Only it might not be my first time. I could’ve had other lovers. I don’t know them. I don’t—
“Willow.” His voice pulled her gaze up to him. “Are you with me?”
She blinked. Focused on him. Sexy Jay. His hair was tousled, and she vaguely remembered sinking her fingers into it when they’d been kissing. He leaned toward her. Kissed her again. Kissed her with soft passion, then harder need. Kissed her until she was moaning and, yes, with him. Only him. Because he was what mattered. Not her past. The past she’d lost. Not her future—a future she might not have.
Just her present. Just Jay.
His erection pushed against her. The head slid against the entrance to her body. Her breath caught in her throat when his fingers twined with hers. He pushed their hands back, moving them so they were on either side of her head.
“Willow.” Her name again. Only it sounded like a caress when he said it. “You are perfect.”
Jay surged into her. There was no pain. Nothing but pleasure. Nothing but a wildness that ignited inside of her. And she knew he felt the same wildness, too. Her legs rose and locked around him as Jay thrust in and out of her. Again and again. He was heavy, so thick, stretching her, and she absolutely loved it. They moved in perfect time. He thrust deep and hard, and she met him eagerly, even as she felt tension coil within her. Pleasure was close. Her release barreling down on her. She could tell it was coming, and she raced toward it, needing that wild burst of pleasure. Needing him.
“That’s it, Willow, hell, yes.” He released her right hand. His hand snaked between their bodies. Found her clit. Touched her just right. Exactly in the way she needed. In the way that made her scream with pleasure.
And he was with her. He surged deep inside of her and growled her name as he came. Pleasure exploded through her, and he kissed her. The climax swept over her whole body, through her, and Willow never wanted the moment to end. She wanted to hold Jay close. To keep this moment forever.
Never, ever forget it.
As she’d forgotten everything else.
***
He’d loved her once. Treated her like a fucking princess. Put her on a pedestal. Spread the world at her feet. Then…
Willow had been gone. Lost to him. A moment in time that he couldn’t take back. Rage had torn through him. The pain had been the worst he’d ever felt. He’d thought he could carry on, could go on, but Willow had haunted him.
A dead woman, his ghost to always carry.
Only Willow isn’t dead. He’d searched for her, for so long. But it had been as if she’d disappeared. Willow had always been good at disappearing. He hadn’t given up, though. He’d never give up on his Willow.
Then he’d seen her. With that prick of a billionaire asshole Jay Maverick. His Willow. Alive. Laughing. Dancing in a ballroom. She’d looked right at him, and she’d stared at him as if she didn’t even know who he was.
Maverick thought he could take her. That he could lure Willow to him with his money and his fame. But what Maverick didn’t get—the guy was going to crash and burn. The bullet he’d fired had missed its mark, and for a moment, he’d felt terror claw through him when he’d seen Willow fall.
Not again.
But she was okay. Alive. She’d even headed to a club with fucking Maverick. His bodyguard? Is that how they’d gotten together? Like the news stories said? He doubted that story. But Willow had always been deceptively dangerous. Such a beautiful face, to hide a devious killer. Willow had such deadly skills. Those skills had drawn him to her in the beginning. Willow looked like the best sin in the world, and she could attack a man as easily as she could kiss him.
Was it any wonder he’d fallen for her?
She’d said that she loved him. Once.
Then why did you leave, Willow?
She wouldn’t leave again. And she wouldn’t stare at him as if she had no clue who he was. He’d mattered to her before. He’d matter to her again. When Maverick’s dead body was at her feet, she’d understand.
Willow had always belonged to him. She would always belong to him.
He wasn’t going to let her go again.
He stared at the house, studying it through his night vision binoculars. Not a house, not really. A freaking mansion. Who needed a place that big?
Guards were at the front gate. Like they were supposed to be a challenge. No, he was more worried about the security system. Maverick might be a dick, but the guy knew his systems. He’d designed plenty of high-tech shit for Uncle Sam over the years. Hell, he’d even used Maverick’s tech on a few missions that wouldn’t be found in any books.
Maybe that was the key. Maybe he shouldn’t try to sneak inside of Maverick’s place. Maybe he should just get an invitation to go inside. He could walk right up to the bastard. Smile. And kill him.
Yeah, that sounded like a fabulous plan to him.
Willow, I have missed you.
Chapter Seven
“You shouldn’t be here,” Willow said the words quickly, even as she took a step back. Shadows surrounded her, a thick darkness, but she knew she wasn’t alone.
He’s here. He found me. Hadn’t he once said he’d always find her?
“You left…where did you go, Willow?” His voice was low, a rough rasp in the darkness.
She shook her head. He shouldn’t have found her. She’d been promised that he wouldn’t find her. “Leave me alone.”
“Never.” A low, tender whisper. “You belong to me. I belong to you…”
She didn’t belong to anyone but herself.
“He can’t protect you.” A slight edge of anger slid into the words. “He can’t keep you from me.”
“I don’t need protecting.” She took a step back, her feet sliding over the thread-bare carpet. Her hands were loose a
t her sides, her body tense. “And we’re done. Do you understand? We are—”
He surged toward her, a fast burst of fury and strength. “We’re done when I say we are.”
***
“Stop!” Willow cried out as she jerked upright. Her heart thundered in her chest, and a light sheen of sweat covered her body.
“Willow?” Jay’s voice. Light flooded on beside her, and she realized he’d just turned on a lamp. The light pushed back the darkness.
He was waiting in the dark. He uses the dark to his advantage. Always has.
She sucked in a deep breath.
“Baby?” Jay was beside her in the bed. His chest was bare, his hair tousled even more than normal, and the covers pooled near his waist. “What’s wrong?”
“I—” She floundered. Stared at him. Then her gaze whipped around the room, almost as if she were searching for a threat. She could practically feel the threat, but no one was there. You left…where did you go, Willow? She grabbed the covers and pulled them up to her chest. “I think I had a bad dream.”
Beside her, Jay stiffened. “You don’t have bad dreams.”
No, she didn’t. Not bad dreams. Not good dreams. Not since she’d woken in that lab. Or at least, she didn’t usually remember the dreams when she woke up. Things were changing now.
“Willow.” Jay seemed hesitant. “Was it a dream or a memory?”
She shook her head. Nothing had been clear in the dream. She hadn’t seen the man’s face. She’d just felt him. His strength. His anger.
And she’d been afraid.
Willow jumped from the bed, pulling the covers with her. Suddenly, she felt far too exposed. “I need a shower.” Sweat still clung to her body. For a bit there, she hadn’t even realized she was dreaming. “It seemed so real,” she mumbled. Her feet padded across the floor as she headed for the bathroom.
“Willow.”
His low voice stopped her.
“Do you want to tell me about it?”
She wanted to pretend it hadn’t happened. Not at all. “Shower first.” Because she wanted to wash away the fear. It clung to her skin like the sweat. She hesitated. “Join me?” Willow realized that she didn’t want to be alone. Not then.