by Alexa Land
She shook her head, which made the bells on her plush antler headband jingle. “Now you’re just making excuses. If it’s meant to be, you’ll find a way. You and me, we don’t know each other all that well, but I’ve always gotten the impression you’re a very cautious person, Jed. Now, there’s nothing wrong with that. The world needs people who carry umbrellas, just as much as it needs the ones who dance in the rain. But men like Dakota don’t come along every day, sonny.” She patted my cheek as she told me, “Don’t fuck it up.”
As she crossed the room to join the kids, Jessie said, “You know, Nana’s never wrong.”
“I’d love to not mess this up, believe me.”
That made my brother smile. “You can say fuck, Jed. I won’t tell on you.”
“Yeah, yeah. I’m uptight. You know it and I know it.” I pulled my phone from my pocket and changed the subject. “I need to call around and see what I can do about getting Dakota’s truck fixed.”
“I’m way ahead of you,” Jessie said. “I called one of the local garages this morning and towed the truck over there. It’s a pretty straightforward repair, and the mechanic was able to expedite the parts we need. They’re arriving tomorrow morning, and since he seemed really knowledgeable, I asked him to go ahead and install them for us. By the way, I’d told Dakota that I was going to do this yesterday when we were towing your SUV out of the mud, which is why I still had his keys. I don’t want you to think I just absconded with his truck.”
“Thank you, Jessie. Make sure the bill comes to me and not Dakota, okay? I feel responsible for that breakdown, so I want to be the one to pay for it.”
“Sure.”
I took a sip of coffee before saying, “I can’t believe you did all of that before breakfast.”
“Our son never lets us sleep in anyway, so I figured I might as well be productive. Isn’t that right, Ry Ry?”
The toddler was sitting between us in a booster seat, sticking cereal in his mouth with his stubby little flingers, and he grinned happily. My brother wiped his son’s mouth with a cloth and asked, “Want to go back to running laps? I’ve had my coffee, so I’m ready to start chasing you again.”
Kai smiled at his husband as Jessie picked up their son and brushed some crumbs off his tiny shirt and overalls. “Remember when we couldn’t wait for him to start walking? What were we thinking?”
Jessie chuckled at that, and then he kissed his son’s forehead and put him down. The moment the child’s soft-soled shoes hit the carpet, he started running. My brother said, “See you both later,” as he took off after him.
“Signal me when you’re ready to trade off,” Kai called.
I watched them go and said, “He’s such a great dad.”
“He really is. I don’t know if he ever told you this, but Jessie was worried about how he’d do with a baby. He’s always been wonderful with Izzy, but she was six when we met. I kept telling him he had nothing to worry about, and I was right.”
Kai watched his husband and son as he spoke, and pure adoration shone in his dark eyes. I turned my gaze to my hands, which were idly creasing the hem of my white sweater. A few moments later, Kai asked, “Are you okay, Jed?”
I let go of the hem and stuck a smile on my face. “Yeah, fine.”
“You don’t seem fine.”
After a pause, I admitted, “I’ve always compared myself to Jessie, ever since we were kids. I know that’s pointless. It’s like comparing apples and oranges, because we’re very different people who’ve always wanted different things. But I can’t help but look at his life now, and it seems so full. He has you and two wonderful kids, lots of friends, the Dombruso family, a nice home, and a thriving business. And then there’s me. Even though my life is empty, I somehow can’t even make room for a tiny little cat.” Or a tall, gorgeous man with tattoos and a love of flannel shirts…
“Your life isn’t empty, Jed. You have us.”
Kai meant well, so I said, “You’re right, I do.” But getting to be a part of my brother’s perfect world wasn’t even close to building a life of my own.
It was right about then that I realized I was letting my emotions get the better of me. I got up from the table and asked, “What are your plans for today?”
“Izzy’s been begging to see that new Disney movie again, and Ry actually sat through it last time, so we’re going to catch a matinee at a local theater. Want to come with us?”
“Thanks for the offer, but I’ll pass. Message me when you guys get back, though.”
I went into the lobby and stood at the picture window, watching the rain come down sideways as the wind buffeted the surrounding pines. A minute later, I spotted Dakota reflected in the glass. He was doing an exaggerated tip toe worthy of a cartoon character, which was so ridiculous that it immediately lifted my spirits. I grinned and let him catch me.
As he lifted me off my feet, he yelled, “Boo!” He squeezed me before putting me down again, and then he said, “I love your family, both the real one and the Sicilian-American one that decided to adopt two grown men.”
“Oh, it’s not just two. Nana’s brought countless gay people into her family. It’s just what she does.”
“She’s a hoot. I was talking to her last night, and she says they’re planning to come back to the bar this evening after the kids go to bed. I hope she brings the whole family.”
“Let’s make sure of it.”
I led the way to the front desk and asked for a piece of paper and a marker. Then I drew up a flyer with block letters that said: Come As You Are Kitschy Cocktail Party, 10 pm tonight! I wrote down the address for Dakota’s Bar, then stuck the flyer to the lobby’s bulletin board.
“Let’s figure out some fun, easy snacks,” I said. “We won’t charge for them, since you probably don’t have a license to sell food. It’ll just be a nice gesture for the Dombrusos and your regular customers. The theme is retro kitsch, because I think they’ll love that. We could look up some 1970s drinks and appetizers, and plan accordingly.”
“That sounds fun.”
We returned the pen to the kid behind the counter and made sure the shuttle bus was going to be available for the Dombrusos that night, and as we went upstairs to get our coats, I said, “You mentioned knowing the people who own this lodge. Maybe you could see about setting up weekly themed events for their guests. Hundreds of people come up here during ski season, but there’s not much nightlife. It seems like an untapped market.”
“You’re brilliant,” Dakota said, as he took my hand.
I just shrugged. “Anyone could have thought of that.”
“Give yourself some credit. You just came up with all of that in about two seconds, and it’s impressive.”
“Ideas are cheap. Having a way to make them a reality is the hard part, but since you own a bar, I actually have an outlet for all the random stuff bouncing around in my head.”
A couple of hours later, we pulled up behind the bar and unloaded cases of liquor, groceries, and some shopping bags. Dakota turned on the radio, cranked the heater, and plugged in the Christmas lights while I fished through a bag from the dollar store.
I’d kept one of my purchases a secret, and I put it on before turning to him and asking, “What do you think?”
He started laughing at the sight of my big, fake mustache and asked, “What’s that for?”
“If we’re going for a retro vibe, I thought it’d be funny to hand out 1970s porn star-worthy mustaches to our customers.”
“What about the ladies?”
“Oh no, these are unisex. Pornstaches for all!”
Dakota pulled me close and kissed me, and then he scrubbed a hand over his lips as he asked, “Is that what it feels like to kiss me? If so, I need to rethink my scruff, because that totally tickled.”
He turned his back to me and picked up something as I said, “No, because you don’t have a huge, hairy caterpillar on your lip. Please leave your beard alone, because it’s sexy as hell.”
&nbs
p; When he turned back to me, he’d stuck one of the mustaches above the bridge of his nose. He wiggled his unibrow suggestively as he asked, “Really? You think I’m sexy?”
Now it was my turn to burst out laughing, and I exclaimed, “You have to see yourself!”
We put our heads together, and I snapped a selfie with my phone. When I showed him the picture, he chuckled and said, “That’s hot.”
“These mustaches are already the best thing I’ve ever bought.”
“Hands down.” He kissed me and squirmed, and I grinned and peeled off my mustache before kissing him again. He smiled against my lips and said, “It’s the unibrow, isn’t it? It’s turning you on.”
“Well, duh! Nobody can resist the hypnotic allure of the unibrow.”
I stuck my mustache between my eyebrows, and he chuckled and lifted me off my feet. As I wrapped my arms and legs around him, he said, “You’re so much fun.”
“That’s literally the first time anyone’s said that to me.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“Come on. Remember the guy you met on Friday night? The one who’d planned to spend his vacation analyzing spreadsheets? That guy’s not fun.”
“When I met that guy, he was dancing a jig in thirty-degree weather while dressed in nothing but a pair of sexy briefs. It went something like this.” Dakota began to leap from foot to foot in an exaggerated jig, and I whooped with laughter and held on tight.
He finally came to a stop in the middle of the bar and sat me down on one of the tabletops. Then he kissed me again, and when both of us started to get turned on, he pulled off my sweater and tossed it aside. “I think we just invented a brand new kink,” he said, as he unbuttoned my pale blue Oxford shirt. “Unibrow foreplay.”
“It’s sure to sweep the nation.” I grinned as I peeled off both of our fake mustaches and stuck them to the table.
He pushed my shirt off my shoulders and kissed the base of my throat. Then he nuzzled my neck as he said, “I really want to fuck you, Jed, but I just don’t feel right about being the one to initiate it.”
“That’s because you know I’m pretty inexperienced, right?”
He nodded. “If we don’t end up going there, that’s fine too. But either way, you need to take the lead.”
I pulled my shirt back onto my shoulders and looked up at him as I said, “I want to. God, I want to. But I need a little more time.” That made no sense. The one thing we didn’t have was time. It was already Monday, and I was going home Wednesday night.
Deep down though, I knew why I was holding back. I was getting way too attached to Dakota. If we had sex and that intense connection between us became even stronger, how the hell was I ever going to walk away from him?
“That’s totally fine,” he said, as he ran the back of his fingers over my cheek. “I’m having the time of my life with you, so it’s all good, no matter what we end up doing.”
“Thanks for being so understanding.”
He retrieved my sweater, and when I slid off the table, he took my hand. “Come on,” he said, “let’s get some of those weird snacks going. Would it screw up the historical accuracy if we put vodka in the mini Jell-o molds?”
“Yes. Let’s do it anyway.” He grinned and led me to the kitchen.
We started to get a bit nervous that night when ten p.m. came and went, and the only people in the bar were us and one of Dakota’s regulars. I’d gone back to the lodge that afternoon to spend time with Jessie, Kai, and the kids, and it certainly seemed like people were planning to show up for our cocktail party. But the later it got, the more my stomach tightened. Dakota had spent a bunch of money on food and mixers that were all going to go to waste if nobody showed up.
But then at 10:32, the shuttle bus pulled up, and Nana was the first person through the door. She was carrying a huge black purse and wearing a red velvet dress with fluffy white trim. Her husband Ollie was in a matching velvet suit, so they looked like a stylish version of Mr. and Mrs. Claus.
“Sorry we’re late,” Nana said, as she and Ollie pulled up seats at the bar. “I know it’s supposed to be a ‘come as you are’ party, but some people went and got all fancied up anyway, so then we had to go change. You can’t show up looking schlumpy if everyone else is dressed to the nines.” She gestured at her family members, who were pouring into the bar.
“Well, you look great,” Dakota told her, “and we’re glad you’re here.”
Nana rubbed her bony hands together and said, “What kind of drink specials do you have for us today? The ones yesterday were fantastic!”
“We recommend the Harvey Wallbanger,” Dakota said, as he indicated the chalkboard with a flourish. “The theme tonight is 1970s kitsch.”
I added, “Though invented in the 1950s, this questionably named cocktail reached its zenith in the 70s, and it’s actually really tasty.”
Nana exclaimed, “Well, now who doesn’t love a good Wallbanger! I’ll take two.” Dakota grinned and went to work.
The turn-out ended up being better than we’d hoped for. In addition to over forty members of the Dombruso family, several locals also showed up, drawn by the music and the festive atmosphere. It was a small bar, so with that number of people, the place was packed.
Dakota and I never stopped moving, between keeping the drinks flowing, the appetizers stocked, and the glasses washed and ready for the next round. At one point, Jessie and Kai showed up, and my brother said, “A couple of our friends offered to babysit, so we decided to come and check this place out.”
“I’m so glad you could make it,” I said, as I gave my brother a hug.
“We’re happy to be here. By the way, Izzy took her job of cat-sitting very seriously and checked on your little buddy about thirty times today. She wants a cat now, which is totally your fault.”
“Just break down and get her a cat. You know the kid always wins.”
“You’re probably right. What’re you going to do with the cat when your sitter goes home in a few days?”
“Dakota’s going to start bringing him to the bar, but he wanted to wait until next week when it’s not so hectic in here.” I pulled a couple of things from my pocket and handed them over as I said, “Before I forget, here, have a 70s porn star mustache.” At least half the crowd was wearing them, which I thought was hilarious.
Jessie stuck a big, black handlebar mustache on his face and said, “This is awesome.”
“Glad you like it.”
“It looks like you guys are swamped, so tell us what we can do to help.”
“This is your first night in a week without the kids, so I want you both to relax and enjoy yourselves,” I said, as I put together a pair of drinks. Meanwhile, Kai stuck a bushy, blond mustache to his face. Then he and his husband looked at each other and grinned.
When I handed them the cocktails, Jessie looked past me and said, “Okay. But, is he alright?”
I turned to find Dakota standing perfectly still and frowning. When I followed his gaze, I spotted a handsome blond in an expensive suit standing just inside the door. I touched Dakota’s sleeve and asked, “Who is that?”
“Malcolm. My ex-boyfriend.”
“What’s he doing at the bar?”
“If I had to guess, I’d say he’s probably on his way back to Sacramento from his sister’s house in Carson City and figured he’d drop by for a booty call.”
“Okay. So, what do you want to happen here?”
He met my gaze with pain in his eyes. “I just want him to go away.”
“Permanently?”
He grinned, just a little. “That sounds like you’re offering to kill him for me.”
“Not quite, but I’ll make him quit coming around if you want me to.”
“I’ve tried, many, many times. He just doesn’t take the hint.”
“Well, then maybe it needs to be more than a hint.”
“Probably, but you don’t need to mix yourself up in this. He’s my problem, not yours,” Dakota said
, as he peeled off his fake mustache and tossed it in the trash. He looked so defeated.
Malcolm had been working his way through the crowd during that conversation, and when he reached the bar, he smirked at Dakota and said, “I’ve never seen more than four people in this dump. What are you doing, giving out free blow jobs with every cheap beer?”
I’d already hated him before he opened his mouth, and now I felt like punching him in the face, which was entirely unlike me. I snapped, “What he’s doing is running a successful business, which means he doesn’t have time to waste on your sorry, cheating, bleached blond ass. Do us all a favor and slither back out of here.”
He shot me a withering look and asked, “Who the hell are you?”
I squared my shoulders and held his gaze. “Someone who’s smart enough to know Dakota’s an absolute treasure, and worth so much more than a random booty call.”
His smile was cruel when he said, “I suppose to a hick working in a bar, like you, he would seem like quite the catch.”
“You don’t know me. You obviously don’t know Dakota, either. Otherwise, you’d realize he’s always been way too good for you.”
Malcolm crossed his arms over his chest as he said, “Please. That boy’s nothing but trailer trash.”
I turned to my brother, peeled off the thing stuck to my upper lip, and said, “Hold my mustache.”
Jessie took it from me with an expression that landed somewhere between amused and stunned. In the next instant, I scrambled onto the bar, leapt at Malcolm, and knocked him to the floor. He was a lot bigger than me, so when we both stood up, I knew for a fact I was about to get pummeled.
I stood my ground though, and raised my fists like I was in some kind of old-timey boxing match. Then Malcolm drew his fist back and took a swing at me. But it never made contact, because Dante Dombruso caught his hand in mid-air and glared at Malcolm.
As if it wasn’t enough that Dante was about six-foot-four and a wall of muscle, his equally huge, totally intimidating brother Vincent backed him up. Malcolm’s eyes went wide, and he blurted, “Who the hell are you guys?”