by Bree Wolf
As−despite her best efforts−joy began to blossom in her heart, Diana felt a careful smile tug at the corners of her mouth. “Why?” she asked, returning his question to him, seeing the same hesitation on his face that she herself had felt only a moment before.
He inhaled deeply through his nose, and the muscles in his body tensed as though he was preparing himself for an attack. His mouth opened…but then closed again, and Diana’s hopes sank.
Dropping her gaze, she lifted her arms and urged him to release her.
For a moment, he seemed to comply before he suddenly drew her to him with even greater force than when she had almost gone over the rail. His fiery eyes met hers, held hers, as he opened his mouth and said what she had longed to hear. “Because I love you.”
Before Diana could even comprehend what he had just said, before she could revel in the soft feeling that slowly built within her, his lips claimed hers in a passionate kiss.
***
Holding her in his arms, Arthur wondered how he could ever have lived a day without her and fancied himself a content man. Now, however, he was more than simply content. He felt deliriously happy.
As she returned his kiss, he wrapped his arms more tightly around her, determined to never let her go again.
In answer, her arms snaked up and came around his neck, pulling her closer against him. Her fingers brushed over his neck, sending tingles all over his skin. However, then she suddenly stepped back, pushing him off her, and his heart stopped, dread filling his being.
Smiling up at him, she held his gaze, and his heart slowly calmed. Then she whispered, “I love you, too,” and for a moment, he closed his eyes, suddenly aware how desperately he had needed to hear that, “I thought you might want to know.”
Delighted with the teasing tone in her voice, Arthur rested his forehead against hers, feeling the strain of the past minutes leave his body.
“What do we do now?” she whispered then, a touch of uncertainty and apprehension in her voice.
Lifting his head, Arthur frowned, praying that she would not refuse him. Not when he had finally realised what he wanted and on top of that had found the courage to admit to it. “We get married,” he stated simply, unaware that he was holding his breath.
In answer, her eyes bulged and the air rushed from her lungs as though her head had just broken the surface after diving into the ocean. Then she closed her eyes, drawing new air into her body, and a soft smile lifted the corners of her mouth. “Are you serious?” she whispered, searching his face.
He chuckled, unable to help himself. “Have you ever known me not to be?” Her face aglow with happiness, Arthur felt his own heart sing with joy. “Are you truly surprised that I wish to marry you?”
Diana swallowed, and a dark shadow crossed her eyes.
“What is it?” he asked as tension once more gripped his body. “Do you not wish to marry me?”
Instantly, she shook her head. “No, that’s not it. I do. Believe me, I do.” She drew in a deep breath, needing to fortify herself for expressing what was on her mind. “It’s simply that I’ve been here before.” Shaking her head, she snorted as her eyes drifted over their surroundings. “In this very spot four years ago, I had my heart ripped from my chest because a man I thought I loved refused me, and it changed everything. It changed me.”
Inhaling deeply, Arthur pulled her closer with one arm as his other hand cupped her face, making her look up at him. “I’m sorry for the pain you had to go through,” he whispered, “however, I am glad that you did.”
A frown came to her face.
“For if he had wanted to marry you then, I would have lost my chance,” Arthur said, terror filling his heart at the mere thought of it. “Never in my life have I been more grateful that there are dishonourable men in this world for if he had done his duty, I could not marry you now…not out of duty, but for love.”
“Truly?” Diana whispered, her face flushed, her eyes filled with awe as though he had just descended from the heavens.
Arthur nodded, a large smile on his face. He could not remember ever having smiled as much as he had that night. “The world−my world−would be empty without you.” Clearing his throat, he held her gaze, needing her to understand. “Emotions have never come easy to me−I cannot say why−but loving you simply happened.” He shrugged, still at a loss, unable to explain even to himself how this had come to pass. “I cannot even remember how or when, but it did.” Gently, he brushed his lips over hers, then met her eyes again. “I do love you.”
A teasing smile lit up her face. “Does that mean you were jealous?”
“Of course, I was,” he growled before his voice softened once more. “As were you.”
Taking a deep breath, Diana nodded. “I was.” Then she swallowed, and tears formed in the corner of her eyes. “I thought I’d lost you or rather that I’d once again imagined your affection…as I had before.” Sniffling, she brushed a tear from her cheek. “Once again, I thought that no one could love me. It’s always felt like a cruel joke. As much as I always dreamed of it, it seemed as though it would never happen. Not for me.”
“I know what you mean.” Seeing incomprehension on her face, Arthur sighed. “I’ve never been in love myself. I’ve never even felt the slightest inclination to be closer to someone.” He shrugged. “I don’t know why, but it always made me wonder.” A deep smile tugged at the corners of his mouth and he allowed it to spring free. “But not anymore. Now, I know why.”
“Why?” Diana asked, hope shining in her beautiful eyes.
“Because I was waiting for you,” he whispered.
A moment later, she flung herself into his arms, her blissful sighs music to his ears.
“Will you marry me then?” he asked, realising that she hadn’t yet given him an answer.
Pulling back, she met his eyes and her lips parted. However, then she hesitated, and for a moment, his heart stopped, only to pick up where it left off when he saw a teasing curl come to her lips.
“What is going on in that devilish mind of yours?” he asked, his eyes searching her face.
Biting her lower lip, she grinned, a mischievous sparkle in her gaze. “Oh, I will marry you. However, it just occurred to me that…I am technically still in mourning.”
“Technically?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at her.
“Well, you know what I mean,” she replied mockingly before her gaze grew serious. “Can you wait a year?”
Arthur swallowed as he realised that the circumstances of their situation had never even occurred to him. Of course, she was still in mourning. If they married now, people would talk. Their reputations would suffer. It would be a scandal.
Everything he’d ever tried his utmost to avoid would come to pass if he were to break this particular rule. And yet, Arthur couldn’t help but smile as he realised that he didn’t care.
Seeing his reaction, Diana’s face broke into a deep smile as well. “Neither can I,” she declared. “However, I feel compelled to warn you that…if I were with child, it would be considered yours, your rightful heir.”
For a moment his eyes narrowed. “Are you?” he asked earnestly.
Holding his gaze, she shook her head. “I simply meant to say that society might believe any child born to us within the first year to be my late husband’s. Could you live with the whispers?”
Arthur frowned as his eyes searched her face. “Are you trying to convince me not to marry you?”
Diana laughed. “I simply mean to warn you,” she said, and the expression on her face grew serious again. “The life I’ve lived these past few years was far from easy. I don’t want you to wake up one day and regret the path you’ve taken.”
Shaking his head, he pulled her closer. “The only regret I’m afraid of ever waking up to is not having married you.” Holding her gaze, he nodded, needing her to believe him. “Any child of yours is mine as well. Including Ben. If you’re willing to share him.”
For a second, she c
losed her eyes, seemingly savouring the moment before her eyes were on him once more. “What about your mother?” she asked teasingly.
“To hell with my mother,” Arthur declared laughing, knowing only too well that she would be yet another obstacle they would have to overcome. However, with Diana by his side, he didn’t care. “So, will you finally answer me?”
“I thought I already had.”
“That was not an answer,” he insisted. “That was a warning. I want a clear answer. Yes or no?” Holding his breath, he waited, a part of him still thinking that this couldn’t be true.
Only when she pushed herself up on the tips of her toes, her arms wrapped around his neck, her fingers once more trailing over his skin, sending shivers through his body, and kissed him with all the passion he felt in his own heart did he dare believe that miracles did happen after all.
“Yes!” she declared in a steady voice when she pulled back, looking up at him with eyes that held nothing but promise and hope. “My answer is yes.” Then a flash of mischief returned to her gaze. “How soon do you think we could dare to get married?”
Pulling her back into his arms, Arthur kissed her breathless, congratulation himself on finding the one thing he had never known he’d wanted, wondering if tomorrow might be too soon.
Epilogue
Summer 1820
One Year Later
“Hush, hush, hush,” Diana cooed as she gently rocked her newborn daughter in her arms. Bouncing in her step, she slowly moved around the nursery, humming under her breath as her eyes occasionally shifted to her son and her husband.
At almost two-and-a-half, Ben had grown tall, and his face had lost most of the adoring chubbiness that had given his face such a sweet roundness as a baby. Sitting on the floor in the middle of the large room, he slowly lifted his hand, picked up one of the many wooden blocks strewn about the room and carefully moved it to the top of the tall tower in front of him.
“Slowly now,” Arthur cautioned, his gaze narrowed as he held his breath watching their son as he worked, his little forehead scrunched up in concentration. “Yes, that’s it. Hold it steady.”
Smiling, Diana watched them as they sat together on the floor, heads bent toward each other as though they shared secrets with one another she was not privy to.
A lot had happened in the past year, and in rare quiet moments, Diana could still not believe the change her life had taken. Ever since that night at Lord Barrett’s ball, regret and misery had been emotions of the past, their absence allowing for the excitement and happiness she now felt whenever she awoke in the morning, remembering the many joys her new family brought her.
Yes, it had not been easy. Arthur’s mother had been beside herself with shocked rejection as she had not seen it coming. Never would she have imagined that her virtuous son would propose to a woman who had been at the centre of society’s gossip for the past years.
However, Arthur had been adamant in defending their relationship, making Diana’s dreams come true. Finally, she had found a man who truly loved her, who not only said so with his eyes when he caught sight of her across the room, but who would wake up every morning pulling her into his arms and whispering those very words into her ear.
And still, sometimes Diana wondered if she was only imagining her happiness as the past had clearly left its mark on her. Would her heart ever completely recover? Would she always feel this insecure when it came to believing that someone truly loved her?
Gazing down at her sleeping daughter, her little face completely at peace, Diana sighed, sinking into the upholstered armchair in the corner of the room.
Perhaps the remnants of insecurity she felt were not a curse after all, she realised as she once more lifted her gaze and felt her heart dance in her chest at the sight of her family. Perhaps it was the very means that helped her cherish her life and the happiness it brought, that helped her see that she never ought to take it for granted.
After all, she knew only too well that it could be different.
As her daughter continued to sleep peacefully in the crook of her right arm, Diana once more turned to the short list she had laid down on the small table beside her when her daughter had started crying. Reading through the names listed there, Diana opened her mouth to address her husband, but then hesitated as she lifted her gaze and found him beaming at her son.
“Well done, Ben,” he exclaimed, patting their son on the shoulder before brushing a hand through his wild curls. “I’m proud of you.”
His face aglow with accomplishment, Ben stared at the tall tower in front of him. For although the top block stood a little crookedly on the one below and the tower had swayed slightly when he had removed his steadying hand, it still stood, tall and proud.
“Wonderful, Darling,” Diana praised her son before her eyes shifted to her husband.
Meeting her gaze, Arthur smiled, a sense of blissful joy in his eyes as he smiled at her and their daughter. “Is she asleep?”
Diana nodded, then once more looked at their guest list for the dinner party a fortnight from today. “Lord Harrington and his wife will attend,” she mumbled, her eyes shifting over the names. “As well as Mr. and Mrs. Everett.”
Her husband nodded. “Yes, I received their confirmation this morning.”
“Good. Rose and her husband shall attend as well, now that their daughter finally sleeps through the night. However, she wasn’t certain yet if her brother-in-law and his wife would be back from Italy in time. We shall wait and see.” Lifting her gaze, Diana looked at her husband, a bit of apprehension in her eyes. “What about your mother?”
A touch of an apologetic smile on his face, Arthur nodded. “She confirmed.”
“Willingly?” Diana enquired, a smirk on her face.
Arthur laughed. “A lot has happened since last year,” he reminded her with a twinkle in his eyes. “For her as well. We’ve all changed.”
Diana nodded, remembering the previous summer and its rather tumultuous developments. “What about Eleanor and her husband?”
Again, her husband laughed. “You know that she would never miss an opportunity to see the children, especially now that she is expecting as well.”
Diana smiled. “She will be a wonderful mother.”
“Yes, she will,” her husband agreed as he rose from the floor and strode over. Stroking a gentle hand over his daughter’s head, he met Diana’s eyes and her heart skipped a beat at the unconditional devotion she could see there. “As are you.” Leaning down, he placed a gentle kiss on her lips, a promise of more passionate ones to come later that night.
Diana sighed happily, barely remembering that at one time in her life she had believed that she had wasted her heart on the wrong man, convinced that love would never find her again.
But it had.
And she would never take it for granted.
About Bree
USA Today bestselling author, Bree Wolf has always been a language enthusiast (though not a grammarian!) and is rarely found without a book in her hand or her fingers glued to a keyboard. Trying to find her way, she has taught English as a second language, traveled abroad and worked at a translation agency as well as a law firm in Ireland. She also spent loooong years obtaining a BA in English and Education and an MA in Specialized Translation while wishing she could simply be a writer. Although there is nothing simple about being a writer, her dreams have finally come true.
“A big thanks to my fairy godmother!”
Currently, Bree has found her new home in the historical romance genre, writing Regency novels and novellas. Enjoying the mix of fact and fiction, she occasionally feels like a puppet master (or mistress? Although that sounds weird!), forcing her characters into ever-new situations that will put their strength, their beliefs, their love to the test, hoping that in the end they will triumph and get the happily-ever-after we are all looking for.
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