by Cameron Jace
“How about this one?” He hands me a hookah that writes random words in the air when you blow out the smoke. How this is possible, I have no idea.
Who r u? The Pillar writes in the air, just like a 1951 Disney movie.
I have to admit. I am tempted to try it. But I realize I am just wasting time while I have a lot of questions.
“Pillar.” I pull him by his sleeve. “I had a vision where I saw Lewis Carroll in the bus accident.”
This stops him from having fun.
He faces me with a keen look in his eyes but says nothing.
“Does that look mean you knew about this?”
“Not knew, but the assumption had crossed my mind,” the Pillar says. “Bear in mind I have no idea what happened on the bus. I only found you after that, when I got into the asylum.”
“So why did you assume Lewis Carroll was on the bus?” I say. “My brain is about to explode. It’s all so confusing. Why is Lewis a Wonderland Monster?”
“Because it’s not exactly Lewis who you saw on the bus. Nor is he the man who plagued the world with his hookahs.”
“Then who is that man looking so much like Lewis?”
“Didn’t you hear nobody say his name? Carolus Ludovicus.”
“I’m not following. Who is Carolus Ludovicus?”
“The hardest Wonderland Monster to kill,” the Pillar says. “Because he is also Lewis Carroll.”
Now my head spins even more.
53
HOOKAH FESTIVAL, BRAZIL
We walk among the festive Brazilian crowd as the Pillar tries to explain things to me.
“You remember when I told you Lewis Carroll’s real name?” he asks me.
“Of course I do. This is the second time you’ve asked me this. Charles Lutwidge Dodgson.”
“Charles was looking for a pen name to use for his book, Alice in Wonderland,” the Pillar begins. “Let’s skip why he needed a pen name for the book for now. What matters is that he spent weeks looking for a special name. One of his ideas was to try to translate his real name to Latin. Charles in Latin is Carolus.”
“I’ve never heard this before.”
“Because people are usually obsessed with books, not their authors.” The Pillar walks next to me in the haze.
“And Lutwidge is Ludovicus?”
“Now you get it,” the Pillar says. Fireworks play all around us. “But then you realize how villainous the name sounds. Interesting but villainous. So he decided to play with it a little. First move was to try Ludovicus Carolus.
“And then?”
“With a little wordplay, it became Louis Carol, and finally Lewis Carroll.”
“I understand. But it doesn’t explain him becoming a Wonderland Monster, or is he?”
“Let’s put it this way. Lewis took drugs like any other Victorian author in a time when it was a common and legal practice. And like most artists, they’re usually stimulated by pain or euphoric substances. Don’t make me count the endless names in history who’d prove my theory.”
“I don’t agree with you, but continue anyway.”
“Lewis’ headaches were the main reason for his addiction. A drug, or rather a cure, called Lullaby, a Wonderlastic invention,” the Pillar says. “The drug helped with his migraines, which he had explained as splitting his head in two. There is a famous scribbled drawing of him with a split brain found in his diaries.”
“An image he drew himself?”
“Yes. Lewis used to beat the migraines with art, poetry, and masterpieces until he desperately needed Lullaby.”
“Which I assume the Executioner and his people provided back in Wonderland.”
“Exactly, and the tricky part is that Lewis still lived in Oxford at the time. He had found a way to move between the two worlds and get his fix.”
“Still, this doesn’t explain...”
“Just bear with me. So the drug worked for a while until the Queen of Hearts found out about Carroll’s need. Since this was at the peak of conflicts in Wonderland, the Queen ruling with an iron fist and Carroll trying to create the Inklings to oppose her, she made sure the drug disappeared from the face of Wonderland.”
“And then Lewis had continuous headaches without a cure.”
“The headaches intensified so much he began to draw many of those split images of himself,” the Pillar says. “Sir John Tenniel, Carroll’s painter, and good friend noticed this and warned him of the consequences. But Carroll just loved his art and wouldn’t stop, even with his killer migraines. Tens of times, they found find him lying comatose on the floor in his studio. And when he woke up, he didn’t remember where he was and what he had done.”
“I don’t like where this is going.”
“I know. Sadly, it’s the truth. Carroll was turning into Carolus Ludovicus when he passed out.”
“What? Like a case of Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde? Lewis had some kind of a split personality? This explains why the man in London is the real Lewis Carroll,” I say. “Poor Lewis. He just needs help. Someone to wake him up from this dark alter ego.”
The Pillar stops to face me. I’ve known him long enough to know this is the moment when he drops a bomb on me.
“It would have been easier if all that happened to him was discovering he just had a monster inside him,” the Pillar says. “One day, Lewis woke up from his episode and saw someone sitting opposite him at the table.”
“Someone?”
“Someone who looked like him.”
I don’t say anything. I only tilt my head in disbelief.
“Lewis Carroll was staring at Carolus Ludovicus in the flesh,” the Pillar says as the fireworks light the sky in red above us. “His other and darker self manifested as a separate and real being. A Wonderland Monster.”
54
HAHA STREET, DEPARTMENT OF INSANITY
Inspector Dormouse looked back and forth between his officers and the Lewis Carroll man. “Well, that’s the first time we’ve ever caught a criminal in this department.” He chuckled. “Unless you count last week’s rabbit a criminal, which I didn’t end up catching anyway.”
The Lewis Carroll man said nothing. It made everyone worry. These kinds of Wonderland Monsters were never really constrained by bars. Something was wrong.
“My name isn’t Lewis Carroll,” the monster finally spoke, gritting his teeth against the headache. “Carolus Ludovicus.”
“Okay?” Inspector Mouse said.
“Those bars mean nothing to me. I can break through anytime I want,” Carolus said. “But, I am giving you the pleasure of catching me, under one condition.”
“And what could that be?” Inspector Dormouse asked.
“Tell the Queen of England I want to meet her. I know how to stop the plague. But I’ll only do it if she gives me the cure for my headaches in exchange.”
55
HOOKAH FESTIVAL, BRAZIL
I once heard this song that I liked so much. It’s called: The Show Must Go On by Freddy Mercury.
The reason why it comes to mind while I snake my way through the endless smoke of the hookah festival is that it seems to describe what I am feeling.
Think about it. In less than 48 hours, I’ve realized the Pillar betrayed me, I’ve met with one of the lowest scumbags on earth, the Executioner, and I’ve just realized the pain Lewis Carroll went through.
I mean, who can live with his own split persona manifesting into a real enemy? An enemy who is in many ways you.
The darker you.
The you with all those thoughts you could never share with anyone.
The you with all those ideas you never knew you had buried in a grave in the back of your mind.
The you... who isn’t really you.
Making sure I don’t let the Pillar out of sight, my mind is as foggy as the hookah smoke surrounding us. It seems to me, and I’m not the best candidate to say this, that the Cheshire was right. And he always will be. We’re all mad here.
The one thing I’d add to h
is famous phrase would be: So there is no need to point fingers. The world is a marshmallow bubble of mess. Enjoy it while you can.
A few minutes ago, I asked the Pillar if he knows why Carolus was on the bus. The Pillar said he knew nothing of the bus or what happened in it. He also said that whatever I had imagined was likely hallucinations from the mushrooms. I don’t know what to believe.
“Alice!” The Pillar’s voice pulls me back into the real world. “Have you seen this?” He shows me a hookah with an elephant’s hose. “Nutty-tutty weird, right?”
I fake a smile. “I’m going to ask you again. How will we get to that Scientist?”
“Scientisto, if I may correct you,” the Pillar says. “I asked around, and that’s what they call him.”
“They don’t know his real name?”
“Nor does he have an address. But they say he looks like the mad uncle from Back to the Future.”
“I don’t know what that is.”
“A fun movie from the eighties. You weren’t born yet. Don’t bother.”
“So, that’s all?”
“Not exactly,” The Pillar raises his voice against the fireworks and hailing crowd. Some special event is about to take place. “The Scientisto is like a god here. Common belief is that he will send his men to meet with you if he senses you’re special.”
“And how are we supposed to do that?”
“I was told the next event is a good opportunity.”
“This one?” I point at the crowd in the distance. They’re standing next to a tall wall, and it seems the smoke lessens as I walk closer.
“I believe so.”
“How can we show him we’re special in that event? What is it called?”
“How? I have no idea. What is it called? Oh, I know that, and I love it.”
“I’m listening.”
“It’s something Lewis would have loved a lot,” the Pillar says, snaking through the crowd. “It’s called Phantasmagoria.”
56
Settling among the others in the Phantasmagoria event, I see a big truck spurting out big chunks of fire in the air. The flames are thick and light up the night, high enough not to hurt anyone. However, the angle makes our shadows visible on the enormous wall we’re looking at.
I am still not sure what this event or game is.
“Phantasmagoria is one of Lewis’s craziest poems,” the Pillar says, sounding festive like everyone else. “No one really knows what it means, but it’s also the name of a form of theatre in France in the 18th century, and late in England in the 19th century. A very interesting and well known one actually.”
“Theatre? The name sounds like something scary.”
“It is, actually. The Phantasmagoria theatre used a modified magic lantern to project frightening images onto the walls.”
“Frightening as in...?”
“Skeletons, ghosts, and so forth. It happens all the time. Haven’t you ever been to the beach and had the campfire reflect your shadow in scary forms?”
“I haven’t been to the beach,” I say. “But I get the idea.”
“Some artists used semi-transparent screens, frequently using rear projection later,” the Pillar says. “The projector was mobile, allowing the images on the wall to change size on the screen, which, in our current case, will be the wall in front of us.”
Glad to know what the wall is for. Also, I know the fire behind us is meant to cast our shadows on the wall now.
“Of course, there are many variations of the practice,” the Pillar says. “Some were able to cast quick switching images to tell a short story, to show a girl run from a ghost. It was much loved in its time.”
“And we’re going to play it here now, with the fire reflecting our shadows?”
“Not just the fire, the hookahs’ smoke too. You can either use the smoke to manipulate the image or to add another layer. Be creative.”
We start to stand in line next to one another, facing the wall. I’m starting to sweat heavily. The area is getting hotter because of the fire, never mind the Brazilian humidity.
But I am rather enjoying this. The reflections on the walls are funny. People bend their bodies, stretch their arms, and sometimes use an external element to manipulate the shapes on the wall. There is a man whose reflection is a big duck. Another makes his body look like a boat. It’s brilliant. I think the kids would have enjoyed this.
The Pillar borrows a few balloons from others and manipulates his image into a caterpillar sitting atop a mushroom. People go crazy when they see that. They love it.
“Now, that’s something special.” The Pillar winks at me.
“I wish the caterpillar was real,” a little girl comments. “I love him.”
“He loves you too, darling.” The Pillar smiles.
“How do you know?” The girl pouts. “You’re not the caterpillar.”
I burst out laughing. The Pillar’s cheeks redden.
We keep on watching others. Three men manipulate the image into three dogs eating peanuts. I tilt my head back to the Pillar for an explanation.
“They all know the Queen of England eats their precious nuts here,” he says. “None are left for the masses, so they have to make fun of her.”
“Uh-huh. So I am still lost at that something special idea. I see most people are doing incredible things. What could be more special than that?”
“I have no idea,” the Pillar says. “We have to think of something that would attract a man who just cooked a plague to kill everyone on the other side of the world.”
I have no idea what that could be. It occurs to me that I don’t know anything about Scientisto. “I wonder if the Scientist is also a Wonderlander.”
“A very plausible assumption.” The Pillar looks impressed. “But, I don’t know of a scientist in Wonderland.”
“Let’s just say he is.” I have a dangerous idea in my mind.
“Okay. Let’s just say that. So what? Are you going to manipulate your image into writing Wonderland on the wall?”
“No,” I say. “In fact, I don’t need to manipulate anything.”
The Pillar stops his moves and stares at me. It’s that look again in his eyes when he admires my actions. “You have my undivided attention and heart-pounding anticipation.”
I smile and slip my hands into the Pillar’s pocket, pulling out the key.
57
“That’s a very smart idea,” the Pillar says.
“I know. I don’t need you to tell me that.” I hold up the key and adjust my angle, so it reflects on the wall.
Of course, it doesn’t reflect immediately. The key is too small, and the fire is a bit far from where I stand. I run through the crowd, the Pillar following me until I find the spot with the fire nearest to the wall.
Not just that. I spend some considerable time finding the right spot where the key’s reflection is big enough to be noticed. It doesn’t get that big, but it’s enough for the Scientist’s attention—that’s if my assumption is right.
“Seems like it wasn’t a great idea after all.” The Pillar pouts, looking around for the Scientist’s men.
But my stubborn genes tell me it should work. Even if the Scientist isn’t a Wonderlander, the key should attract someone’s attention. This isn’t possible.
“I am afraid to ask, but I need my key back.” The Pillar shrugs.
“You know it’s not your key,” I say, giving it back to him. “But I don’t want it. At least not now. And for the record, I don’t ever want to talk to you again after we save the world this time.”
“Are you so sure you’re going to save the world this time?” He tucks the key in his jacket pocket and rubs off some smoke.
It’s questions like these that make me doubt myself.
Of course I am not sure I’m going to save the world this time. And it scares me to even think about it.
I think about those children again. The world can’t end on their first day of freedom. They still have so much to e
njoy and learn in life, or has the Executioner already sentenced them to death in his grip?
I realize I would have preferred to choke him myself instead of listening to the explosion.
And there is something else I realize now. That Fabiola was right. If you stare into the eyes of darkness, you will always get stained.
“I’m thinking of pulling off my pants and letting out gas into the smoke, the Scientist will definitely notice me.” The Pillar rubs his chin. “I know it’s lame, but so were many of Carroll’s jokes.”
Lewis!
That’s the answer to how to get the Scientist’s attention. The Pillar’s key may be valuable to many Wonderlanders, but definitely not like the one I have in my pocket.
Sorry, Lewis, I will break our promise. But I have to give it a shot.
I raise the key in the air and stand in that same spot again. Carroll’s key reflects in a shimmering hue over the wall.
“You have another key?” The Pillar can’t take his eyes off it. “Who’s the liar now?”
I dismiss his comments, still staring at the wall.
Then it happens. Not the way I expected, but close. A loud, deafening horn blares in the festival.
58
QUEEN’S GARDEN, BUCKINGHAM PALACE, LONDON
“Welcome back, Carolus.” The Queen of Hearts stood in the middle of the rain, two of her guards holding her umbrella for her. “It’s time we solve this matter.”
“What matter?” Carolus spat rain in her face.
“Your headaches,” she said. “You know, without me stopping the Executioner from giving Lewis his medication, you would have never been created in the first place.”
Carolus grunts, trying to step closer, but he was chained in heavy steel and guarded carefully. Finally Margaret did her job right, the Queen thought.